This wasn't right, he shouldn't feel this way, especially about her, about Pema, right now.
Lin was a force to be reckoned with. She was fierce and fiery and unyielding. She never compromised and was exacting. He wouldn't have her any other way. Because by the Spirits, he felt like she completed him. That they would be together forever, they would have a family, and, hopefully, at least one of their children would be an airbender. The pressure placed on him being only one of two airbenders on the planet was getting to be a heavy burden. One, however, that he seemed to bear alone. The more he tried to bring it up to Lin, the more they seemed to fight and bicker.
He used his airbending to circulate the warmth of their breaths around her body, letting some areas get cool while others remained comfortably warm. Just hot enough that a thin shimmer of sweat would form on her skin. He began kissing a trail from her neck, to her shoulder, to her chest, pausing to lavish attention on those heaving breasts of hers. One hand controlled the air current and the other had delved into her depths, making her writhe beneath him. He smirked at his effect on her as his mouth ventured lower, kissing her abdomen and occasionally scratching the beginnings of his beard on her lower belly. He looked up at her face when she began to squeal and continued to watch her expressions as the noise changed into a huff of mock irritation. The pleasured smile across her features prompted his own.
"You. Are. Sexy." Tenzin murmured against her skin as his fingers curled to find that one spot that made her toes curl in turn.
"So are you," she replied huskily, trying to control her breathing as her hands fisted the living daylights out of the sheets. Her head pushed back into the pillow as Tenzin sent bolts of pleasure through her.
"Just imagine, you glowing, our baby growing in this magnificent..." Tenzin began as he started to trail his tongue from her navel down to the edge of her womanhood.
But before he could even get to the good part, Lin's mood suddenly changed. At first she felt defeated, but then she just felt angry. She metalbent the cables from her cop uniform that had been carelessly and hastily taken off and thrown to the floor, and used them to secure Tenzin's wrists to the bed frame at the foot of the bed. .
"Oh, I didn't realize we were playing good cop, bad cop," Tenzin murmured as he rearranged his legs and opened them wide for easier access to her.
"Can it," Lin spat as she threw the pillow at his groin, causing him to jump and yelp unceremoniously.
"What the..." Tenzin muttered, completely oblivious as to why her mood would suddenly sour.
"How many times are we going to have this conversation? I don't want kids. I have no desire to be a mother. I am THIS CLOSE to becoming Police Chief. I have a city to protect and I can't do that with a baby on each hip," she snarled.
"But your mother did," he argued back.
"I AM NOT MY MOTHER! I have no motherly instincts. You've seen me with children; they always cry. I can't stand crying. I am not cut out to wipe up drool and change diapers. And if you are so stuck on having children, perhaps you should do it with someone else, because I'm not interested," Lin stated resolutely as she took the sheet and covered herself to make sure Tenzin would keep eye contact.
"But you'll see, it's not that bad. It's very rewarding, and it's what you were meant to be," Tenzin tried to soothe.
"WHAT I WAS MEANT TO BE?! ARE YOU MY FORTUNE TELLER NOW?! How could you say that to me?! It's like you don't even know me!" she bellowed, becoming more enraged by the second.
"That's not true. I know you better than you know yourself. I love you," Tenzin replied as calmly as he could.
"CLEARLY YOU DON'T, OTHERWISE YOU WOULDN'T KEEP BRINGING THIS UP! THIS IS THE LAST TIME WE WILL EVER TALK ABOUT THIS!" Lin roared as she got up and hastily put her clothes back on, ignoring her mused hair. She didn't bother unbending Tenzin from his bonded position until she was almost out of the room, forcing herself to shut out all of his pleas.
That was two weeks ago, almost three. They hadn't spoken since then, and for all he knew they were broken up. Again. And with Pema's admittance of her feelings for him only the day before, to say he was feeling "confused" was a gross understatement.
He liked Pema, he really did. She was sweet and kind and beautiful, but he didn't know if he would feel that same fire he felt with Lin. Pema did have a quality; something he had great difficulty in really describing that drew him to her. He always enjoyed her company and had really started to miss her when she wasn't around. And last night he couldn't get her face or her voice out of his head. Even now he had a hard time getting her out of his mind. Perhaps the term "like" wasn't the correct term, because it was starting to feel like more than that.
Perhaps Lin and himself weren't meant to be? And if he stepped back and honestly looked at his current situation, wouldn't he realize that his relationship with Lin was toxic? That really, Pema would be the most ideal in every aspect that really mattered to him?
But could he love her, not the same way he loved Lin, but perhaps something comparable? Just as much? Just as deep? Just as all consuming?
He didn't know yet, but a large part of him wanted to find out.
Special thanks to Alaburn for betaing and you can thank dupreerose for HEAVILY HINTING AND TRYING TO 'INSPIRE ME' to write this.