Awkward conversation ahead. Better don't take it serious ;-P
Chapter 2 The Question
Edeline stood in front of Mustang's office door and swallowed. Now was her last chance to back out. But that stubborn idea from Friday night in the bar had refused to leave her despite thinking long and hard about it and so even now she still thought she wanted it. What she didn't want though was the conversation needed to get to the event.
There was no way she could seduce Mustang or something so the only way to get him to do what she wanted was with a reasonable discussion. But how do you ask your superior officer for something that, by the way, was not only illegal with the military fraternisation laws but also quite embarrassing and inappropriate?
She attempted to bang her head against the door, both because of frustration and because that would finally make her knock on the door somehow, but instead fell forward into the chest of the very same person she wanted to talk too. Mustang, having just opened the door, caught her by the shoulders, a mixture of concern and confusion in his voice when he asked, "Fullmetal? Uh, are you all right?"
"Need to talk," she mumbled into the broad chest, beet red.
"Yes... Sure..." the brigadier general said slowly, obviously confused that she didn't pull out of his grip immediately. Carefully he stepped back and let go of her shoulders, waiting for a moment to see if she would fall forwards again. "Well, go in and sit down, I'll just grab some coffee. Do you need anything?"
"No, I'll just go and wait," Ed quickly walked in, still too embarrassed to look up, and sat on the couch. She could feel the raven haired man stare at her for another moment, then he went to get his coffee.
Edeline chewed on her lips while waiting. Damn, this was so stupid and embarrassing! But she refused to back down and be a coward even if she hated to ask Mustang for a favour. Much less a favour like this, it would blow up the bastard's giant ego even more! Oh, just why did she think this was a good idea? He wouldn't laugh about her while at it, but before, for the question? Why did she only think about that now? He would laugh, he would so laugh, she couldn't do it! She stood, attempting to flee and almost bumped into Mustang again as he walked back into the office.
"You sure are weird today," he stated, stepping to the side, allowing her to flee, in slight amusement about her confusion. Ed was tempted to do so but the 'weird' translated to 'cowardly' in her head so she went back to the couch, sitting down and fiddling with the edges of her red jacket's sleeve.
Mustang made a move towards his desk and a sudden instinct had Ed yell, "Lock the door!"
"Why?" Mustang asked in a way that indicated he suspected she would pull a prank on him as revenge for all the short jokes if he cut off his escape route. Not that he would run, he would fight back. As long as Ed hadn't realised the existence of water pistols yet, that is.
"You don't want anybody to hear what I'm going to say," the girl managed.
After a long moment she heard the lock click and relaxed a little bit. She watched Mustang walk to his desk from between her bangs. There was no particular sway in his hips or something, his steps were a focused military march and still she couldn't help but stare and blush and think about how those hips would move against hers should she succeed in convincing him to be her first, should she get the damn question out of her mouth.
"So, what has you all bothered and flustered?" he asked nonchalantly as he sat and sipped from his coffee.
She swallowed, too flustered to deny that she was, well, flustered. Okay, how to do this?
"I- I want you to-... to teach me something!" she stuttered out, urgently but still not sure how to word what she wanted.
He chuckled and raised an eyebrow. "So you wanted me to lock the door so no one could hear that the great Edeline Elric needs her useless," he ground his teeth at the word, "commanding officer to teach her something?" Smirking at her face becoming even redder he sipped his coffee again.
Ed sat there, a light tremble coming up as adrenaline pumped through her to gather up the courage needed to point her finger at him and blurt out, "I WANT YOU TO BE MY FIRST IN BED AND TEACH ME HOW TO HAVE SEX!"
Mustang's coffee cup dropped on his desk and he choked on the liquid he had just tried to swallow. Any other day Ed would have revelled in seeing her commanding officer trying to regain the ability to breathe while developing a bright red flush and simultaneously trying to wipe coffee from his chin and save the papers on the desk from the black broth, all the while looking like Ed had just told him and proven that he was a penguin and had never realised it. As it was though Ed just sat there, arms stiff at her side, hands grabbing the edge of the couch tightly, trembling from excess adrenalin and waiting for her doom.
Finally Mustang had the basics of his composure back together and his desk more or less tidy and coffee clear. Only then did he sit down again, stared at Ed and asked a flabbergasted, "Come again?"
"You heard me!" Ed screeched.
"Yes but right now I'm not sure I can trust my ears!" he answered, his voice actually pitching a bit higher in shock.
"Why not?!" Was it really so hard to belie- yes it was.
"You just asked me to have sex with you!" The epitome of incredulous.
"Don't act like that is something special to you you damn womanizer!"
"But you're my subordinate, years younger and you can't stand me!"
"I canstand you when you for once don't act like a total bastard!"
They sat there, just staring at one another for the moment, red faced and confused.
Closing his eyes for a second Mustang started to calm down again. He prided himself in his ability to stay level headed in almost every situation so he would not flip out now. Well, not totally, a bit he had already.
"Okay," he then started in a more level voice. "So you can more or less stand me but I'm still older than you, as you like to rub in should you remember."
"I thought about it, I don't care if you're an old man-"
"Old man? Just because I'm older than you doesn't make me an old man!"
"-actually I appreciate it because you don't find it weird when I think like someone far older than I am and- "she blushed, her calm voice pitching in panic again, "and you- and you havedamnexperienceandyoudon'tlookthatbadforyourage!" she rushed out, blushing even more.
Mustang took a deep breath, trying to keep his cool, and chided himself for acting like a fifteen year old who tried to avoid a second bees and flowers talk with his parents. The next problem helped him calm down and go back to business mode more easily. "Well, thanks for the compliments, but the biggest problem still remains: You are my subordinate. Us doing anything is illegal," he stated in a discussion-is-over tone.
"Oh, come on! Half the generals screw their aids and other soldiers date too and no one cares!" She rolled her eyes.
"Screwing a secretary or some low ranking idiots fooling around is quite different from me screwing my major, a fellow state alchemist and a girl much younger than me that I have known since she was twelve. Do you know how that will look? Like me being a paedophile who takes advantage of you!"
That shut Ed up for a moment and she hung her head. She really didn't want to ruin Mustang's goal of becoming Führer. And that seemed to be the only problem here. Wait... She looked up, slightly surprised. "You only argue the usual points thateveryone would bring up. Does that mean that- that you personally wouldn't mind... helping me?" she asked, peaking at Mustang carefully from between her hair.
The raven haired man sighed, making a few of his bangs fly upwards. "Don't get me wrong," he said, looking her in the eye. "I'm neither out for easy to get sex, I don't need you for that, nor do I have a crush on you or any other kind of affection that surpassed friendship and comradeship." He looked down at his desk and added a bit quieter, "I just prefer you being safe with me to you getting it on with some idiot who doesn't care about you. Because if you came asking me then you must have really had no luck in finding someone who fits you better so far." His gaze snapped up again. "You don't have a crush on me or something, do you?" he asked, his face telling that he didn't want to hurt her yet would be flattered and amused.
"What, no!" she assured quickly. "I just want you because... because..."
"I have experience," Mustang concluded and even though he didn't look or sounded offended or hurt or something at all Ed still felt bad because the answer made it seem like Mustang was nothing but a beginners toy for her.
"That," she admitted quietly. "That and I trust you."
The small happy smile was almost invisible but Ed still saw it lift the corners of his lips and it made her smile too for a second.
Then they sat there, awkwardly silent again.
"Ohm... so... once your contract has run out you can... uh come around and remind me I agreed to this," the brigadier general finally offered, sheepishly scratching at his neck.
Edeline swallowed. She had managed the initial question, she could get this out too! So she chocked it out. "Mustang...I- I can't wait this long." She had really thought about waiting until her contract's end but she had waited so long already and the hormones were driving her crazy and she just wanted to get it over with.
He blinked, slowly. "I don't want to ask. Why?"
"Because I never had the time or peace to do anything until now and now my body drives me crazy and I just want to touch and feel and be touched and try to kiss and- and- and try not to be awkward, try to- to- EVERYTHING!" She flailed her arms around, trying to emphasize 'everything', then blushed and hid her head with the limbs.
Mustang cleared his throat, looking like he was trying to find the way to word this best. "Have you ever tried to... ahm... relieve the stress yourself?"
Edeline's face turned as red as her coat.
"I guess this means yes...?" the brigadier general asked hesitantly. He really didn't want to fish out that information it seemed.
Ed could only choke out "It doesn't help."
They sat there for a while longer, awkward silence coming up again.
Ed chewed on her lips, trying to find words. "I- I know this is selfish of me to ask," she started shyly "but no one will find out anyway, right? I mean even if we'd wait until my contract ends... if we get caught then they would still suspect you're a bastard who took advantage of me for a while now. So we would need to make sure it stays a secret anyway..." She trailed off and hoped she didn't just talk him out of it, feeling even more selfish.
"So you really want to do this, huh?" Mustang asked after a while, brow furrowed in thought.
"Yes," she said, clear and determined.
"Are you sure you can handle that without developing a crush on me afterwards?"
"You call me short all day long, bastard, how could I possibly develop a crush on you?!"
He just smirked. "You'll get to see me naked."
She swallowed. "I know. I can manage."
"I'll get to see you naked."
"I know, do you think I'm stupid?!"
His smirk only widened, unperturbed "And we'll touch each other."
She gulped once more.
"On bare skin."
Her face was so red, it must contain all the blood in her body.
"I KNOW THE THEORY, STOP TALKING!" she yelled, putting her hands over her ears, only uncovering them when Mustang looked serious again.
"Just making sure you know what you're asking for," he said calmly. "Are you sure you can handle acting normal around me after that?"
"I've pushed bigger things out of my mind."
"DON'T CALL ME SMALL!... But yes I can do that too," she added quieter.
Mustang just regarded her for a long while. "Give me a few days to think about it," he then demanded, rubbing at his temples. And then he smirked once more. "You can hold out for that long without jumping me, can you?"
"I hope your giant ego isn't the compensation for the size of somethingthat I'll maybe get to see soon," Ed huffed, at a point where getting even more red in the face was already impossible.
Mustang stared, then laughed. "You talking about size compensation... I'm surprised you haven't discovered high heels for yourself yet."
"DON'T CALL ME SMALL YOU COMPENSATING BASTARD OR YOU'LL LOSE THE THING YOU'RE COMPENSATING FOR ONCE I'M THROUGH WITH YOU!"
The brigadier general just kept laughing. "Oh, I could listen to this all day long if the volume wouldn't give me a headache after an hour. I hope you won't scream that loud when you're coming, can't have people hear my name that would defy the whole purpose of keeping it secret!"
Edeline chucked a couch pillow at the brigadier general and stomped out of the room, seething, red faced and ignoring that she had just pulled a locked door open, ripping the lock apart.
She just hoped Mustang was joking about her screaming his name while coming because he had decided already. Having that fantasy put into her head was the last thing her body had needed, it drove her crazy enough as it was.
On Friday of the same week Edeline found herself in front of Roy Mustang's office again, a mission report tucked underneath her arm. Mustang hadn't said a single word about her inappropriate request since she blurted it out on Monday but Ed guessed that when he said he needed a few days to think about it he was probably thinking of telling her now, when she was due for her report and had to come in anyway.
Though while listening to her oral report while flicking through the written version he didn't say anything. He also didn't speak up when she was done. All he finally said was "This report is well done. I apologise beforehand."
She was confused. "For what?"
"Just step out of the office..."
Ed frowned, the smirk on the brigadier general's face was telling that he was up to something. She was wary as she slowly tuned to the door, pushed the handle down and pulled the door-
"-do that report again Fullmetal, just because you don't like the military and get out in a few months you can't give crappy reports like that! I expect a new version today and I don't care if you show up at my house a minute before midnight and ruin my date, you will bring a new report in today, do I make myself clear!?"
Hearing Mustang yelling at her immediately put the pissed off expression required for the show on her face. That bastard could have given her a warning!
"Yeah I understood!" she snapped over her shoulder before slamming the door closed, huffing and glaring at Mustang's subordinates who looked at her with sympathy.
"Don't take it to heart Ed, he's been snappy all day long. Must have a really terrible headache if he takes it out on us. Normally he doesn't do that," Havoc shrugged.
Ed grumbled something incoherent and angry, then smirked. "You know what? I'll really show up at his house one minute before midnight, just to teach him not to be that much of an ass! And I'll bring a report so crappy he will have to waste the whole night trying to explain to me what I did wrong!" Laughing like an evil maniac she walked out, proud of their little show.
Now even if she was seen coming over to Mustang's house, people wouldn't get suspicious because as soon as the rumours reached these trusted subordinates they would smother them. After all Flame and Fullmetal annoyed each other enough that such a prank was much more likely than the totally absurd idea of them having sex.