585A/N: Uhm... Hi. *sweat drop*
I have no excuses.
Enjoy my song of the day and chapter for you.
Song of the Day: Not Today
By: BTS
Lost Cause
It's his job. Being in this special operation requires apathy, a cold heart, and dead eyes, making him just the man to do it. Of course this doesn't mean he likes it. However, when he runs into three young teens in the worst possible situation a life could lead, it turns out that he isn't as heartless as he once thought he was. Modern day AU: Officer Levi, Prostitute Eren. (Lots of trigger warnings. You're going to hate me so much for this fanfic.)
Rated M for adult themes, sexual content, adult language, violence and gore, child abuse, rape, drug abuse, oh so much more that I can't even list.
Main pairing: Riren. Other pairings with side pairings.
Anime: Shingeki No Kyojin (Attack on Titan)
Chapter 49: Reunion
The next time he saw the kids, it was under more morbid circumstances.
It had been a week, and after a quick talk in the halls with Armin, he'd come to find that Eren stood by his word.
He wasn't going to do it.
They didn't want to do this to him. They really didn't. They wanted Eren to be willing to go back, and they wanted for him not to lose his trust in them. Doing this was going to put a strain on him and his relationship with everyone, including Armin, who he'd just gotten back.
He hadn't meant to really involve the blonde in this type of situation. He was sure Eren would agree to it if was Armin who asked him, but after he refused, Levi realized that Armin now knew of something Eren didn't. He'd switched their rolls and thrown Armin into a situation he didn't belong in, just like they'd done before.
Once again, he'd gone and messed up, but they had to fix this. He had to fix this. He needed to make this right.
If there was a chance, even the tiniest of chances that Grisha wasn't set free, it was something they could work with.
He needed to keep fighting.
That meant they had no choice.
They all met up in Erwin's office. It was cold, raining, and awful outside. Armin was afraid of thunderstorms, which meant he was up all night, and because he was up all night meant so was Mikasa and Eren. That meant their moods were already on a sour note so early in the morning. Hanji was trying hard to remain chipper, to bring up their spirits, but she knew there was only so much she could do.
It wouldn't mean much in a few moments anyway.
"Good morning, everyone." Erwin greeted, as awake as one could be at eight in the morning on a Monday.
There were few replies, small responses and a groggy yawn from Levi as he sat back in Erwin's chair. The taller man gave him a confused look, but the officer returned it with a look that dared the man to force him out of the chair. It was too early for any of this.
"Why do we have to be here so early?" Eren groaned, rolling head to land on Armin's shoulder. Definitely way too early in the morning to talk about this.
"I have a press conference at nine, so this was the only time to do it." Erwin told him and sat on the edge of his desk. "Do you want to take a guess at why we're here, Eren?"
There was a pause from him. Armin felt the brunette instantly stiffen against him, his head slowly lifting from his shoulder.
He wasn't dumb. He knew what this was about.
"Eren-"
"Armin," Levi quickly interrupted him by shaking his head. Armin didn't need to be in trouble for his mistake.
"It's about the case, Eren." Hanji told him.
"I already said no. I'm not going." Eren instantly rejected him, standing up from his chair to pace. He couldn't leave the room with Hanji by the door, unintentionally (or maybe it was intentional) blocking the doorway.
"Yes, you are." Erwin spoke in a deep tone, a tone of voice he used when authority was needed.
"No, I'm not."
"I put in for a court order a couple of days ago from judge Zackley." Erwin told him. "You don't have a choice now."
"What...?" Eren's voice cracked at the sudden high pitch. "You can't do that!"
"We tried to get you to go willingly, Eren." Levi assured him.
"I'm not going! You can't make me!"
"Eren, calm down." Hanji stood away for a moment to reach out to him, but the utter disgust he felt in their actions showed at the way he backed up from her.
"Eren, if you don't show up under court order, I'll have no choice but to place you under arrest for failing to appear in court." The blonde man explained.
"What...?" Mikasa gaped at him in surprise. This was news to her.
"You never said that!" Armin barked at Levi.
"Fine then!" Eren's words took everyone by surprise. All eyes were on him in the room, staring at him in morbid shock that he would even agree to something so crazy. "I don't care! I said I'm not going and I mean it!"
"Eren, wait a second-" Mikasa reached out for him, but he was like a startled animal, quickly backing away from even her own touch.
"No! I'm not going back!"
Eren's resolution was firmly set in place. There was no changing it.
They would have argued it more, said things, and told him he had no choice or face jail again, but they stopped when Hitch came into the room.
"Commander," She quickly interrupted, followed by a shout outside of the room. "We need your help out here."
She was gone as fast as she came in. Levi, Hanji and Erwin shared confused looks with each other before Erwin walked out, Levi following at his own pace.
There was yelling outside of the room, frantic shouting, but only from one person. A female voice it seemed. Behind it was someone else, a male voice, but it didn't sound half as frantic as the woman's did. It sounded concerned, worried even.
Following the man, the officer stood in the doorway. It was easy to spot who was shouting, seeing a very tall and thin woman standing at the doorway to the main office. Her hands balled into fists, her freckled face red from yelling, her hair a scattered mess inside of its pony tail, but he wasn't sure if that was her usual style or from the rain outside.
"No! I did not drive one hundred fucking miles to be turned away at the god damn door! I want to see them!"
"Miss, calm down." Marlow was trying to calm the young woman down, but she was already livid. This had nothing to do with him.
"Stop it! You're gonna get us in trouble!"
She wasn't alone. Behind her stood a group of young adults. Two men and two other woman.
The woman who told her to stop was shorter, but still tall by his standards. Her brown hair was pulled back into a pony tail higher on her head, a worried expression on her face. A man beside her, bald and relatively short, was holding onto the tall woman's arm, seeming to hold her back from doing anything crazy. She seemed to have an upper hand though what with her crazy height.
There was another girl, shorter than Levi was, with her blonde hair pulled up into an odd sort of a bun on the back of her head. She was very quiet for such a tense situation, but she looked really annoyed with the tall girl. The boy beside her, tall, muscular, with hair almost as dark as his own and freckles too match the girls, looked like he was ready to join the smaller boy in holding her back.
"Excuse me," Erwin interrupted. He had height on the tall girl, but she didn't seem deterred by his appearance or arrival at all. "Is there something I can help you with?"
"W-We're looking for the victims in your most recent case." The bald teen explained. "Eren, Armin and Mikasa? Are they here?"
"W-We just want to see them." The brunette beside him said.
"I'm sorry. We cannot allow anyone to see them right now while we're brief-"
"Don't give me that shit!" The tall girl spat once more. "Where the fuck are they?"
"Eren..."
Armin's timid voice brought Levi back into the room. His eyes fell to the blonde, noticing the very far off look in his eyes that were looking down at the floor. He seemed to be focusing on something, like the voices outside of the room. He couldn't see the people, and yet there was some form of recognition on his face, like he knew these voices. Knew these people. He seemed to recognize them just from the tone alone.
"That sounds like Ymir..." He mumbled, looking to his friend with furrowed eyebrows.
"It does..." Mikasa agreed quietly.
Eren nodded his head in agreement before slowly walking forward, passing Levi to look outside the office. He allowed him, noticing the curious look in those green eyes that questioned the voices he heard. Armin and Mikasa were close behind, not ignoring him for a second to be left out.
The older man watched them carefully, sharing a careful glance with Hanji who was staring just as intently. The two of them were watching them, calculating, judging, testing their limits. This was all new territory. Maybe not to them, but to the adults it was.
They knew these people.
"I cannot divulge in that information right now, miss. Now I'm going to have to ask you to leave." Erwin told the teen in his usual, authoritative manner.
"I ain't going anywhere, fucker." Her response was as cold as ice as she stood up to him. Erwin looked about ready to get security on her before Eren stepped out of the room, pulling everyone's attention to himself.
"Ymir," He called out to the girl. Their eyes fell on him, shock quickly evident in their expressions. "You gonna look over here, or are you gonna get yourself arrested?"
The room fell silent, all except for the key's that had been in this persons, Ymir's, hand, fell to the floor. Not a soul in the room dared to move, breathing strained, eyes wide, waiting. Just waiting. It felt like a test. A draw. They were waiting for someone to pull the trigger.
The tension was crushing.
The trigger was pulled when the girl with her brown hair pulled into a pony tail suddenly sobbed, hands coming up to cover her mouth as she shook.
"Oh my god..." She cried. Erwin and everyone else ignored, she ran away from the group and darted towards the teens, running past desks and office chairs to run into Eren's arms, which had been open and waiting.
This was something quite interesting to see from him. He was so startled by human interaction, so fearful of anyone that wasn't in his close, personal circle, but this girl must have been close to him to allow her a hug so quickly. She must have meant something judging by her breakdown. She must have meant something by the way Eren held her close, his head falling to sit on hers.
"Hey Sasha..." He greeted quietly.
"Oh my god, Eren! Y-You're alive...!" She cried into his chest, her hands fisting into his shirt. "Holy s-shit you're alive..."
One by one, the teens each ran towards them. Sasha had gone from hugging Eren to falling into Mikasa's arms, bawling wretchedly against her. The bald teen, the girl with the blonde bun, the tall teen and the freckled one all came up to them, teary eyed, breathless, speechless. The one clinging to Mikasa seemed to be the only one who could speak a full sentence, but it was hard to understand her. It was something that had to do with them being alive. That was all Levi could translate from her broken tone.
There were hushed whispers. The three teens were trying to calm down the others, who all seemed so emotional. It was hard to imagine calming them down anytime soon, but they tried.
It was impressive. Interesting. He'd never seen the three of them like this.
"It's alright, guys. Please don't cry…" Armin pleaded, finding himself in a hug with the short, blonde girl.
"The fuck are you talking about?" Ymir questioned him, seemingly angry, but she couldn't have been. What did he do wrong? "We just… You've been dead for four years. We just got you back."
"You can't expect us not to be a little emotional…" The girl within Armin's arms pulled back, wiping at her cheeks. She seemed ashamed of her tears, like being caught crying was a weakness to her.
"No Annie. Not you too." The freckled boy said, sniffling as he waited for his turn.
"Fuck, if you're going to do that, what's the point of me holding back?" Ymir asked, trying to keep a steady tone.
"Please don't." Eren pleaded with them, giving the bald teen one last squeeze before hugging the freckled brunette. "I can't stand to see you guys so upset."
"We're just… We're just happy…" Sasha's sniffling had decreased, but it was hard to make out what she said past her broken sobs.
"You have no idea…" Annie sighed heavily, her body shuddering as relief fluttered over her body.
"I think I can make a guess…" Mikasa mumbled, her hand lightly rubbing Sasha's head. She wanted nothing more than to hug each and every one of them, but the teen wrapped around her was hard to shake. She wouldn't do it though. Sasha did nothing wrong to be shaken off and tossed aside.
Erwin walked up from behind them, eyeing them suspiciously, but the Captain looked over to him with a pointed glance. He shook his head lightly, waving his hand to tell the taller man that it was okay. They were okay. His service wasn't needed.
"Hey, Eren…" He spoke up, making the teen look at him. Levi motioned over to the alcove with his head, his free hand pointing to some spare chairs at desks no longer used. "How about you grab some chairs and go sit over there? It's probably a bit more private…"
Well, not entirely so. He'd be watching them like a hawk.
Thirty minutes went by. If he were being extremely specific, it'd been thirty three minutes and forty two seconds, but he wasn't going to be that person.
He'd sat at his desk, pretending to do paperwork, but in actuality, he'd been listening in on the group of teenagers nearby. Eren, Armin and Mikasa were probably aware he was doing it, but they didn't complain. No complaints were made at all as they all talked, catching up with one another after years of separation.
He had an idea of how the teens felt. He had thought for three years that his niece had died in a fire, only to find out she was alive, and a prostitute of all things. That was overwhelming for him, so he had an idea of what they were going through.
They were happy though. Them and his kids. Hearing them laugh after months of torture was music to his own ears, hearing them chat and talk like nothing had ever happened. Like the past three to four years were years that never existed in their lives. He was glad to see this come from them, and while he wasn't sure how he felt about these new people, only having just met them, he was thankful they came along.
"So where's Bertholdt and Reiner?" Armin asked them, leaning his head into Eren's shoulder.
"Yeah, why didn't they come with you guys?" Eren followed with.
"We really tried to get a day where we all had off, or just something we could take off from work and all, but Reiner and Bertholdt have iron clad schedules. They can't get out of those." The bald one that the Captain now knew as Connie explained.
"What are they doing for work?" Mikasa questioned.
"Contracting. They've got a bid on one site and one job working about an hour outside of town. They've got their hands full." Levi found out that the taller, freckled man was called Marco, too kind for his own good, but kind to his kids, and that's all he cared for.
"Yikes. I can't imagine working that much." Armin mumbled, more to himself than the others. "What about you guys?"
"I'm a waitress at an old pub." Annie told them. "Shit hours, but the tips make up for it."
"I hope you're doing okay there. Like, no one is messing with you, right?" Eren asked her with concern.
"Please. Anyone mess with Annie?" Ymir pointed her thumb to the blonde, a frown on her lips. Said girl looked towards her with a very cold expression, making the teen throw her hands up in the air, as if in defeat.
"I'm fine. Thank you for your concern." She smiled softly, as if she wasn't really fazed by the comment. She seemed very apathetic, but Levi knew otherwise from the display he saw a while ago.
"During the weekdays, I'm a cafeteria lady at our old high school, but on the weekends, Connie and I run a little daycare at our apartment."
"Our apartment, she said." Eren mused, pushing into Armin's side.
"Yeah, I heard our." Armin joined in on the playful banter.
"Oh stop." Connie groaned, rolling his eyes.
"It's not like we all didn't know it was going to happen anyway." Ymir joked. "You've been together since like, what, tenth grade?"
"Ninth grade, miss… Uh…" Sasha had tried to think of something to insult the teen with, but trying to insult her was like trying to catch lightening in a bottle. It just didn't happen.
"Mhm? Mhm…? What was that? I can't hear you over the sound of my ego." Ymir retorted. The group of teens laughed, truly amused by their playful chatter.
It really had felt like nothing had changed, and yet everything had. Four years was a lot of time, and a lot could change in four years. Sasha and Connie living together, all of them working, moving on with their lives.
There was a seldom and reoccurring thought through their heads. All of them silently thinking the same things. They were all stuck so far in the past, and yet their friends had moved on. They'd grown up, gotten out, gotten jobs, and lived.
They lived.
"At least Marco's got a nice job." Ymir said, motioning back to him. "Your kids bothering you yet?"
"No. They're all wonderful children." Marco replied, a warm smile on his face.
"What are you doing?" Eren asked.
"I'm a substitute teacher at our old school." The freckled teen answered. "My six grade class is missing their teacher. She's out on maternity leave, so it's just been us."
"Oh but who doesn't love Marco?" Connie elbowed his side lightly with a grin.
"What about you, Ymir…? Armin had asked the girl sitting in front of them.
"I'm doing lots of odd jobs right now. Whatever I can pick up really." She explained. "Babysitting, waitress, lab rat for the psychology students at my college. Whatever gets me paid really"
"I'm sure it's fun getting to experience all of that." Armin tried to reason with her.
"Yeah, but recently I've been looking for something a bit more steady. I'm trying to kind of clean myself up." She admitted.
"Clean yourself up?" Mikasa asked with a frown. "Did you… Start on drugs or something?"
"No. I just…" There was a tense silence that fell over them. The teens shared looks, as if they all knew what this was about, and probably did. It was only the three of them that had no idea what this was about. "… After I lost Christa, and when we lost all five of you, I kind of fell apart. I mean, the police said you were dead, but we never knew with Christa and Jean. We never knew what happened to them."
Ymir looked over her shoulder at Marco, her narrow eyes looking at him, as if silently asking him if this was okay. Opening up old wounds that never had time to heal was never easy.
"I did a lot of stupid things when I lost Christa. Like, really stupid things. Got mixed up with the wrong people, drank a lot. I got kicked out of my parents place after I turned seventeen. It's been pretty bad, but I've been working to pick myself back up."
"You'd be proud of her…" Marco mumbled, his shoulders ever so slightly shrugging. "She's come a long way."
"I'm sorry to hear that, Ymir…" Eren spoke softly.
He'd never taken Ymir as a weak or breakable kind of person, but the emotion in her eyes, the broken tone of her voice, her slack body posture, and the small clench of her hands together spoke something different. She wasn't a weak person, but the brunette had never seen her so fragile before. On the cusp of falling apart, which she'd already done.
This was her piecing herself back together. She'd already broken, but it wouldn't take much to push her over the edge again.
"I-I'm sorry, Ymir…" Armin's voice shook, stutter evident as he straightened his posture. "About Christa, I mean. Like, w-with what happened, I just…"
"You better not be apologizing for what I think you are." The teen's voice was deeper as she spoke, more stern. Her lips pulled into a deep frown, eyebrows furrowed, and eyes narrowed at the small blonde.
"B-But I'm sorry-"
"Hey, you listen, you little shit." Ymir stood from her chair, a finger pointed towards him in warning. Levi saw the action and heard the hiss in her voice, quickly standing. She was a hotwire of a teen; that was for sure. "That shit that happened? It had nothing to do with you guys."
"It had everything to do with us." The blonde argued as he stood.
Once again, Armin's actions were surprising. He was more confident towards these people than he was with strangers.
"Yeah, it did, but you had no say in it. No choice. You didn't put Christa and Jean in that fire, and you know it." Ymir very nearly grabbed the front of Armin's shirt before Eren stood up and pulled him back, keeping distance between the two. "And god damn it, don't you dare apologize for something we just got back."
Even though he should have stepped in and stopped them, Levi stood back. This conversation was taking and interesting turn, and he couldn't help watching how things unfolded.
There was a pause within the group. A very morbid, tense pause. Clearly they were thinking those words through, but his kids couldn't make sense of them.
"Four years ago, we lost five friends. Police told us three of them died in a house fire, and after a year, they gave up on finding Christa and Jean. We fell apart without you guys, but a month ago, Connie happened to be watching the news, and we got a fucking miracle. Turns out our friends were alive this whole time, living a shit life, yeah, but alive, and sure, hearing about what happened to my girlfriend, a-and to Jean…" She stopped, swallowing, her eyes tearing up. "It's opened up old wounds, but I don't have to wake up in the morning wondering where the hell she went and never knowing why she didn't come back to me. Christa's parents can finally give her a proper goodbye…"
It seemed her sudden outburst didn't attract just his attention. Others in the office, having been farther away or passing by, tried hard not to listen in, but Levi saw the eyes slowly drifting towards them.
"Jean's family can finally say goodbye to him. They can finally move on. We can finally move on. This is more than I thought I'd ever ask for, and don't you dare downgrade yourself. You three were just as important to us as Christa and Jean were. We were like a team, weren't we?"
Ymir's words were strong, empowering, but withering away their resolves. They all knew that none of them, not a single one of them, were mentally capable of keeping themselves together at this point. The dam had broken a long time ago.
"S-So… God damn it, don't think so lowly of yourself. Hearing that you're alive meant more to us than you'll ever know, and getting the answers we needed… This is enough for us…"
Armin fell apart then. He'd been trying to keep himself together, but he couldn't do it. After trying so hard, tears poured from his eyes, his cheeks, nose, and eyes red. His breathing became labored as he cried, ready to fall into Eren's arms, from force of habit it seemed, before Ymir yanked him right into her chest.
The sight alone did it in for everyone else. Levi was kind enough to turn his head away, to give them the privacy they desperately needed, but he was surprised to see it wasn't just them.
There wasn't a dry eye in the office.
He was glad when things had calmed down.
Tensions had been high, but the outright sob fest that had happened relaxed so much. He saw the whole group of them smiling, sharing joke, laughing; when was the last time any of them had laughed that hard? Mikasa was laughing so hard she had to wipe tears from her eyes, and Armin was just about there himself.
They were making jokes about their times together in middle school. Crack jokes about pranks Eren, Connie, and the two that Levi hadn't met yet, Reiner and Bertholdt, would pull on their teachers. Apparently Eren was devious enough to put a thumbtack on his most hated teacher's chair. Connie and Jean snuck into the girl's bathrooms (On multiple occasions) to read the writing on the wall and find out who liked who. They'd sneak out at night, all but kidnapping Armin so they could hang out at an old construction site where they built a little fort.
Also on one occasion the police did find them and take them home.
The girl's didn't have those kinds of stories, but they definitely had some. It wasn't just the boys who snuck into the opposite gender's bathrooms. The girls were never caught, but they left fake girl's numbers on the bathroom walls, so when someone would call it, it was a rejection line.
Levi couldn't help chuckling when he heard Eren suddenly yell "So that was you!" While pointing at his sister. Connie and Marco both were equally just as shocked, and Armin? He wasn't surprised, which meant he either figured it out on his own or was told a long time ago.
It sounded like all of the reminiscing was good for them. It got their minds off of everything, especially the whole situation with the court. It was a breath of fresh air and normality that they needed right now.
He had work to do. He really did, but he couldn't stop listening in on their conversations, especially when Eren wrapped his arm around Armin. It was a normal thing for them, but apparently, not as much for their friends.
"Ooh," Connie mused, eyebrows wiggling as he leaned forward to push at Eren's knee. "I see you two are still all nice and cozy with each other."
"Shut up…" Eren rolled his eyes, but he didn't take anything by it. The two of them had just started dating before they disappeared. It was probably old news in a way, and yet a slight relief for them to know that not much had changed between the three of them.
Or Connie just wanted to tease him. He and Jean had always loved to do that.
"You know I can't resist. You remember that we all placed bets on when you two would get together?" He asked of the brunette.
"Yes, and I remember Mikasa had won that bet."
"You never did pay me." She mumbled, a small smile dancing on her lips as she looked over to Annie.
"You aren't going to hold that over my head after five and a half years, are you?" The blonde asked her, eyebrows raised in mock surprise.
"Yes," Eren's sister answered quite simply.
"I can hear Jean's voice now. 'I knew you two were gross with each other.' I always hated how he liked to point those things out." Eren's attempt at faking Jean's voice brought a smile to the group.
There was a small, collected chuckled from all of them. They all knew it to be true, but the bitter realization that they'd never hear it again was hard on all of them.
"Christa loved that we were together though." Armin mumbled. "She always wanted us to go on a double date with the two of you."
"That girl sure had a fairy tale playing around in her head." Annie said, not as an insult, but the truth. Christa used to be so honest and pure. No one could be sad around her.
"She just had a way about her."
"And Jean had a way about pissing me off." Eren interrupted, trying to keep the group of teens from falling back into a morbid conversation.
"He only ever did that to get a rise out of you." Marco explained.
"Well it worked." He grumbled.
"Oh please. You two were still friends and you know it." Sasha insisted.
"Well yeah, but just because we were doesn't mean he wasn't a dick."
"Eren," Armin sighed, trying to sound more disappointed than he was, but he wasn't. The two of them were hotheads, and in a way, Armin and Marco had the same problems to deal with. They were what kept Eren and Jean under control. So Marco didn't take any offense by it when he made those comments, because he'd been in that same position before.
A small silence settled over them. A small, content silence. A lingering tension, but relaxed. It was easy to feel at ease all of a sudden, but none of them could place why.
It had to break eventually though. They all knew it. There was still a question that lingered in the air, on the tips of their tongues. They knew sooner or later it would come up. It was just a matter of time, and it happened to be now.
"So…" Connie mumbled, eyes shifting from the floor and to the three of them. "Well, for the past month I followed on the case and stuff, you know, so I kind of know the details and what not…"
It didn't take a college degree to understand that he was saying he knew Eren had the captain had slept together. He just wasn't going to put it into words.
"You've heard our whole terrible story…" Mikasa mumbled.
"Well yeah, but like… In terms of the case… And if you can't talk about this, that's cool, it's just… Is it still happening?" He bridged the conversation with hesitation. He wasn't sure if he was allowed to ask this question, or what they were able to answer, but it would be good to figure it out. His fear was simply bordering a topic they may have not wanted to discuss.
"Well… The next date is set next week to determine if it's been deemed a mistrial, but…" Armin's eyes flickered over to Eren.
He was still the problem.
"Whether it still goes on or not, I'm not going." He told them, looking down at the gray colored floor, to his and Armin's linked hands.
"Y-You're not?" Sasha seemed just as hesitant to speak.
They may have been their friends, but the teens they knew nearly four years ago weren't the same. What they had been through made them different, suspect, and anxious. They had to go about talking with them just as they were.
Victims.
"No, I'm not." Eren said.
"S-So what happens to the case then?" Marco asked.
"What happens if they don't make it a mistrial?" Annie followed up with.
"I don't know and I don't care." The brunette stated. "I'm not going back."
"So that's it then?" Ymir asked, her voice suddenly dark, heavy, tension practically dripping off of her. "You're just giving up?"
To that, Eren didn't have an answer. His lips pulled into a tight frown as he turned his head, as if that were his silent way of answering her.
He wasn't going. He wasn't going back to that place. He wasn't going to face Grisha in court, no matter what the results were. He'd already fought this with everyone else, and he wasn't about to start up again.
"The fuck is your problem, Eren?" Ymir suddenly stood up from her chair.
"Ymir, don't." Annie warned her.
"Who the hell is sitting in front of me right now? Because this sure as hell ain't Eren Jaeger. The Eren I know wouldn't give up like this. He wouldn't turn a blind eye to something so serious."
"You don't get it." Eren muttered.
"You're right about that. I definitely don't understand how you can be so fucking selfish!"
"Ymir, that's enough." Annie stood up and place a hand on her arm, trying to push her back, but the taller teen swatted her away.
Armin looked over to Levi, shooting him a grim look. A silent plea to come over and help. Things were getting out of their control.
"Back off, Ymir." Mikasa warned, she herself standing up and getting in between Eren and her.
"No, I won't back off!" The teen barked. "You're just going to sit there on the side lines waiting for someone else to take control of you? You're just going to ignore the fact that Jean and Christa are dead because of that man?"
"Ymir, please-" Armin began, but Eren spoke up before he could.
"You don't understand!" He yelled.
"I understand that you're being a little bitch and giving up! I understand that you aren't even thinking about Jean or Christa! You aren't even thinking about letting them rest in peace by putting that fucker behind bars!"
"That's enough!" Levi yelled over them, getting in between them. By this point, Marco had his hands wrapped around the teen's waist, holding her back. If he didn't, he wasn't entirely sure what the girl would do to Eren, and they weren't about to find out.
"It's not just you that's involved in this! It's everyone around you, and you're forgetting everyone, including my girlfriend and Jean, and you're just being selfish by giving up! You're pathetic, Eren!"
"Lower your voice, or I'll have you removed from this office." Levi warned her with a hard glance and pointed finger. It was no threat to her, already someone who'd seen and feared the worst, but he felt the need to make it obvious. Maybe her friends could somehow convince her to calm down.
"Ymir, please stop," Sasha pleaded with her just before Eren suddenly took off running.
"Eren-!" Armin called after him.
"I'll go get him." Levi told him. "You stay here and calm her down."
The blonde nodded his head, feeling helpless as the man suddenly left them.
He turned to look down the hall when he got there, seeing Eren falling against the wall and sliding to the floor, his hands bawling into fists over his eyes.
He was crying. It was obvious, and yet the officer was somehow taken aback by it. He'd been so happy just ten minutes before, but now he was in pain. Regretting. Suffering.
Why was the world so cruel to him? Even Levi knew Ymir hadn't meant what she said. It was all said out of fear and anger, but she really didn't mean anything by it. However, did Eren know that? Was he cognizant enough to understand she was just upset with the whole situation, and not just him?
"Eren…" Levi spoke his name in a gentle manner as he came up behind him, slowly getting down to his knees. "Hey, come here…"
He held out his arm, the only arm he could, but it was a safe invitation that Eren quickly accepted. He jumped into his embrace, knocking the man over onto his butt while he wrapped his arms around him. He held him tightly, fearing that if he let go, he'd lose him. He couldn't lose him though. He just couldn't. He didn't think he could handle it if he lost him.
"Shh, shh… It's alright, Eren." Levi whispered, rubbing the back of his head with just the lightest scratch of his nails.
"I-I'm sorry…" Eren cried into his shoulder, his tears having long since drenched his shirt.
"No apologies, Eren." Levi told him. "I don't need them. I just need you to breathe for me."
"I can't do it, Levi! I can't do it anymore!"
"Yes you can, Eren. Just one step at a time, and what I want you to do is breathe." Levi began a slow rocking motion, trying to find some way to calm the sobbing teen. He seemed to be at his limit though, and thinking that this had been the last straw for Eren was morbidly worrying for the officer.
He hated to think that this was it. He hated thinking that what Ymir had said had pushed him over the edge, because what would happen if that was the case? Maria's? Was Eren no longer safe by himself?
He didn't want to think this. He couldn't, because that meant truly giving up. It'd be a final nail in the coffin for whatever shred of case they had left, because no one would listen to a child whose mental stability was questioned.
It couldn't be over.
"It's going to be alright…" He whispered once more, his lips against the shell of his ear. "I've got you."
Making promises where they weren't needed wasn't going to help Eren at all, but he didn't know what else to do to make him feel better.
"I-I'll do it…" Eren whimpered, rubbing the heels of his palms into his eyes.
"What?"
"I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll go back to court! Just no more!" He cried, his breathing heavy.
Levi frowned, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he continued to rub his head.
Eren was agreeing to go back, but did he really understand? He was begging for no more, but that was exactly what he'd be getting if he went back.
Maybe his mental stability should have been questioned, but he wasn't going to ask. He couldn't push him anymore without running the risk of hurting him anymore than he already was.
So instead, he remained silent, his hand continuing to rub at the back of his head. Eren's hair had gotten really long at this point, and as he combed through it, pulling on little tangles and snags, he felt some of it slip within his grasp.
He pulled his hand back, watching the hair come with it. It wasn't much, but it was more than the usual amount of hair loss. Eren hadn't flinched, like he hadn't seemed too noticed or feel it either, which meant it was falling out on its own.
He was so stressed that his hair was falling out.
A/N: Ymir's character development in this chapter really makes me anxious, because I want her to come across as a broken soul who isn't very good at talking or expressing herself, but not come across as an ass. Her story and what she tells is very crucial in the story to getting the kids to work with the station, but at the same time, she doesn't do a good job of going about it nicely. Hopefully I made it seem that way. ^^'