Hey! This is my first Fanfic ever! I've always seen fics about some of the other ninja dying, so I decided to write a little deathfic about my favorite ninja's death, and how one of his brothers, my second favorite ninja, reflects on it. PLEASE REVIEW! By the way, flames will be used to roast marshmallows! ;)

DISCLAIMER: I, Corpselover1426, do not own Ninjago or any of its characters.

I never really expected it.

Nobody really expected it. As a matter of fact, nobody was really prepared for it either. Then again, it isn't actually something one can really prepare for anyways. Quite frankly it pretty much took everyone off guard; shook us up pretty well.

The night it happened was not a good time for us – Why would it have been? Losing a fellow brother in arms (or in Nya's case, a brother) is not a time for joy and celebration. That is pretty much the complete opposite of what actually was felt the night he died.

The night Kai died.

I can't help but find a way to blame myself – if I had not hesitated in coming to help him fight Garmadon, he wouldn't have been alone in trying to defeat him. Even a little backup helps a lot. A lot more than none.

Kai, Zane, Jay, Lloyd, and I approach Lord Garmadon warily. His bright, blood red eyes are all I focus on. All I can focus on. He grins a twisted smirk, revealing his razor-sharp teeth. They glint in the darkness. I can tell from his almost nonchalant expression that he is utterly confident – one thing I am not.

"Father!" Lloyd shouts determinedly. "We have come to stop you!"

Garmadon barks a sick, evil laugh that sends chills through my body.

"Foolish ninja! You cannot defeat me, Lord Garmadon!" he cries, raising all four of his arms. "Serpentine, ATTACK!"

His command is followed shortly after, and suddenly, we are surrounded by the Serpentine. Garmadon has begun to walk away, chortling as he holds his belly.

"Don't let him get away!" I scream at the others. "NINJA GO!" I spin as fast as I can, barreling straight into a group of Serpentine. As I stop, one of the snakes punches my gut. I yelp, clutching stomach as a heavy pain radiates from my center. Looking up, I see the others fighting more of Garmadon's large army. Standing, I run over to help a struggling Zane take on three more reptilian soldiers I try my best to keep tabs on the other ninja, but the only ones I see are Zane, Jay, and Lloyd. Stupidly, I stop fighting to scan the area for Kai. Zane makes a strangled noise as he is knocked off balance and falls to the ground.

"Has anyone seen Kai?" I ask loudly, delivering a clean roundhouse kick to one of the snakes' lower ribs. I curse as it counters with a hard punch that lands under my jaw.

"There he is!" Jay calls, pointing behind me. I turn and begin to run over in the general direction Jay pointed in, only to stop and freeze in my tracks.

Kai is facing Garmadon.


I begin to sprint over to help him, but I am abruptly stopped by a Serpentine. It charges at me, as if it is a bull and I am the red flag. Wrapping its arms around my waist, it tackles me to the ground. I groan as the impact knocks the wind out of me. Grunting, I twist and writhe beneath it, punching blindly into the air.

I look over to Kai, who has kicked Garmadon's face, hard. Enraged, Garmadon uses his lower set of arms to pin Kai against a large, grey boulder.

Then he wraps his other hands around his neck.


All I hear in response is a loud, bone-chilling, heart-wrenching snap as Garmadon breaks Kai's neck.

"KAI!" I scream again. Struggling against the snake, I've finally had enough. Hot, livid anger pulses through me. I buck my hips as hard as I can and flip the snake, reversing our previous positions. I punch its face wildly, the stand and kick his groin for good measures.

"I hope you burn in hell," I spit at it darkly, my voice seething with anger. Suddenly, a feeling of panic and dread overwhelms me. I shake it off, and rush to Kai's side.

His eyes are lifeless, his complexion even more so. He is pale and waxy, and his chest heaves with each labored breath he takes. I feel fresh tears in my eyes as his breathing slows.

No, I think. Not him! Anyone but him!

"Kai," I whisper weakly, my voice breaking. A tear finds its way out of my eye and rolls down my cheeks and onto Kai's gi. A broken stop escapes me as his face goes slack, and his eyes glaze over.

His chest stops heaving.

Despite me feeling that his death is my fault, I know for a fact that I'm not the only person beating myself up over this – when death occurs, everyone seems to find a way to blame themselves, a way to feel guilty, even when they had entirely nothing to do with it. And although I know that I am not entirely to blame, I know that I played a large part in it, and that's what is causing the heavy, immeasurable guilt that seems to eat me from the inside out, riddling holes in my heart, causing my chest to ache with despair and longing. Longing for a second chance. Just one more chance to save him, the way he has saved me a thousand times before.

When we reported back to the Bounty well after midnight, Nya and Sensei Wu were both waiting. Yet when only four of us walked through the door before it was closed shut, panic and concern was clear on their faces. I can remember every word exchanged with painful clarity…

"Welcome back boys," Nya says as I step through the door. She is grinning widely, her eyes crinkled as she beams at us proudly. "I made cake!" She announces, winking at me. On any other occasion, the mentioning of cake would have made me light up like a Christmas tree, sniffing the air as I'd try to figure out its location. But not this night. I choke back a sob as I think of how Kai would have surely punched my arm playfully and teased me about my obsession with cake and all things sweet.

I flinch as I hear the wooden door slam shut behind Zane. Sensei Wu is beside Nya, frowning at us. He knows, I think as understanding seems to come into his eyes, almost like the way you fall asleep – slowly first, then all at once.

"Where is Kai?" He asks in his papery thin, ancient voice. Nobody speaks. I try to answer, but my words seem to stay lodged in my throat. I advert my eyes, looking at the ground. Clearing my throat, I start to answer, my voice quiet and hoarse.

"He tried to take on Garmadon by himself…" A silent snivel escapes me, and I feel the tears begin to collect in my eyes. Although I did not say much, it is enough.

I look up at Nya. Her once elated expression has disappeared and was suddenly replaced with wide eyes, full of grief and denial. She shakes her head, her bottom lip quivering. She swallows hard. "No," she murmurs in a trembling voice. "Not him." Her eyes close and silent tears escape them, running absently down her pale cheeks. I don't realize I have begun to cry again until I feel wet tracks fall onto my gi, and I don't do anything to wipe them away.

"I am so sorry, Nya," Zane whispers weakly.

Suddenly, the brave, feisty samurai I have always admired is gone. Instead, she is replaced by this weak, shuddering girl with tears running relentlessly down her bloodless face. Her knees give out, and she falls to the ground with a deafening, choking sob. Her weeping is loud and heartbreaking, and soon it affects the room greatly. My merciless tears are running faster and faster, never stopping. Lloyd seems to have gone into a fit of terrifying hysterics, punching Zane's chest over and over as the agony takes him, twisting his view on reality. Jay presses his back against the wall and slides to the floor. Burying his face in his hands, his grief is noiseless in comparison to Lloyd. Sensei Wu kneels down beside Nya, wrapping his thin arms around her shoulders, holding her as the pain takes her.

I am standing. Standing more still than I have ever stood in my entire life. More still than I stood the first day I had met Sensei Wu. More still than I have stood when I had to pretend to be a statue on one of our previous missions. I stand still, not bothering to wipe at my own tears of suffering and angst. Maybe if I stand still, I'll wake up from this surreal nightmare. Maybe if I stand still, my pain and hurt will go away. Maybe if I stand still, this will all be over.

Maybe if I stand still, Kai will come through the door, saunter over and sling his arm around my shoulder, laughing at how tense I am.

He doesn't.

After the chaos had died down, I finally moved from my spot, swiping the heel of my palm across my bloated cheeks. Then I had stormed off into the bunk room, slammed the door shut, and screamed, "IT ISN'T FAIR!" over and over until I screamed my throat raw. I don't really remember what had happened after that, but I do know that whatever I had done was most likely purely physical. When I awoke the next day, sprawled uncomfortably across the cold, hard floor, my knuckles were bruised and bloody, and there was a massive, gaping hole in the wall. The room looked like there had been a hurricane in it – pillows were ripped, various items littered the floors, some intact, some broke or shattered beyond repair. After I woke up and saw the aftermath of my sorrowful grief, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. I was a living hell.

I still am, actually, but can anyone really blame me? It's my fault Kai died. My fault he his short-lived life came to an abrupt end two days ago. My fault.

I miss him. Hell, we all miss him. And we will always miss him. And that's my fault. I don't know how life will be without him, and I don't really want to anyways. I think of Kai's bright, cheery grin that used to annoy me so much. What wouldn't I give to see him grin that grin? Now, he's lifeless. Literally, he's a corpse that is going to be cremated in a week from today.

I don't know why life comes to an end. I don't know why it had to be Kai's life that came to an end. All I do know is that this is how life is, and that it's too late to change it.

I close my eyes, and allow my tears to flow down my face once more.

It's too late.