A/N: ayyy if i fucked up Karkat personality don't be afraid to tell me all right? all right. because I'm pretty sure I fucked up this entire fic.

sadstuck-ish by the way? maybe just sadstuck i don't know


Your name is Karkat Vantas and you have been left behind once again. You honestly don't blame them for leaving you, you were being a bit of a nuisance anyway. You'd have thought that at least Terezi would have cared to ask you to join them, but oh well.

You tug on the sleeves of your oversized grey sweater anxiously and eventually sit down. A frown takes over your usual scowl and you bring your knees up to your chest, then wrap your arms around them. You refuse to let yourself cry though, because if there's one other thing you don't want to deal with right now, it's your disgusting fucking blood color. You peek out through a crack between your arms and yep, you're still alone.

You honestly don't know how long you stay seated like that but you really don't care either. You feel needy as fuck and you hate it hate it hate it you fucking hate hate hate yourself for even feeling like that. You're supposed to be the leader of God knows what anymore and right now you're acting wimpier than Tavros. You simultaneously pray that nobody comes along to see you like this, but you also kind of wish someone would come find you. Even Vriska would be at least mildly appreciated.

Nobody comes for you, and everything is silent. You figure that it's okay to scream out in ventilation and you do. You clutch your knees and you scream like a loud fucking drama queen and you fucking hate yourself so much right now. Your loud screaming eventually breaks, interrupted by choked sobs as your gross red tears trail down your cheeks and oh god you broke your own promise to yourself and those horrible fucking bright red tears are running down your face and you want to stop but you just CAN'T.

You continue to sob obnoxiously for a few minutes. You bury your face in your sweater sleeves, you wipe tears off your cheeks, but it just keeps flowing and flowing and you're still fucking sobbing like a loser and you shouldn't even be crying over something as stupid as everyone forgetting about you but you seriously can't stop and you fucking loathe yourself but the tears keep flowing and you just can't take it anymore. More strained sobs are still erupting out of your throat as you punch the ground in frustration. Red dirt smears on your knuckles and you quit sobbing. You just stare at your hands, both tear stained and dirt stained, crying silently. You try not to let the tears obscure your vision but it really isn't working.

The only thing that breaks you out of your trance like state is the beeping of your phone. You pull it out of your jean pocket and see who it is. Oh, it's just Terezi. You stick it back into your pocket and took a deep, shuddery breath. You had a fucking meltdown over nothing. You believe in your heart that everyone is just pretending to care for you. If they did, they probably would have brought you along for their shitty ass adventure, but they didn't. They never did, and you don't know why you thought this time was different.

You stand up, use your wet sleeves to dry off your eyes (it didn't really do shit) and look off into the distance. The frown stays on your face as you look at nothing in particular.

Your name is Karkat Vantas and you feel broken from that sobfest you just had. You are not looking forward to having to talk to them, and you just want to die.