This is my take on Doof and Charlene's divorce. It's just an idea I had. I hope you like it!


I'll Always Love Them

Heinz Doofenshmirtz checked the clock. Perry the Platypus would be here any minute. Heinz sighed. He didn't have any evil schemes prepared. He just wasn't feeling up to it, which was ironic. If anything, this would be the day he had an evil scheme. He stared out the window. He could see her house from here. Charlene's house. He balled his hands into fists and clenched his jaw. He was glad Vanessa wasn't there to see him like that. He didn't want to tell his daughter why he was so upset. He wanted to look away from Charlene's house, but for some reason he just couldn't.

A familiar chatter brought him back to reality. He didn't turn around. "Thanks for using the key instead of breaking down my door, Perry." Perry just stared, puzzled. "There's no scheme today. You can go home."

Perry was stunned. This wasn't his nemesis. His nemesis was always quirky and eager to do something evil or at least talk Perry's eardrums off. It wasn't like him to be so...closed off? Formal? Perry didn't know what to call it, but he knew something was wrong. He walked up to the man and gave the bottom of his lab coat a few gentle tugs. Heinz looked at him with such sad eyes that Perry had to restrain himself from hugging the man.

Heinz looked back out the window. "I guess if I can tell anybody, it's you. Take a look." Heinz picked him up and stood him on the window sill, knowing that Perry wouldn't be able to see otherwise. "See that house on the hill?" Perry nodded. "I believe I've mention my ex-wife, Charlene?" Perry nodded again. "That's her house. You see, today's kind of a bad day, for me. It-it involves Charlene and our divorce. I never did tell you why I divorced her, did I?"

Perry looked up at him but wished he didn't. The heartbreak in the man's dark blue eyes broke Perry's heart. He shook his head. He had been curious about what happened between his nemesis and Charlene.

Heinz looked back to his ex-wife's house. His throat tightened, and he shut his eyes to keep himself from crying in front of Perry. "N-nevermind," he choked out. He cleared his throat. "Just go home and let me wallow in my own backstory." He stepped away from the window and slumped down the couch with his head in his hands. He heard a concerned chattered and found Perry sitting next to him. How the platypus got there so fast, Heinz would never know. "Perry the Platypus, what part of 'go home' do you not understand? You have a home, right? You should-you should go to it and leave me alone." His voice cracked on the last syllable.

Perry patted him on the leg. He wanted to help Heinz somehow. If the man would just tell him what was wrong...

Seeing that Perry wasn't giving up, Heinz sighed. "Alright. I'll tell you. You see, Perry the Platypus, today's the anniversary of when I divorced Charlene. The reason I did, well... It-it happened a few years before I met you. Charlene and I were happy, Vanessa was happy, yadda yadda yadda. Then, one day I had to be taken to the hospital. Some kind of problem with my appendix. I don't quite recall what the problem was, but it must have been bad. I needed to get my appendix removed, but the doctors needed a blood doner beforehand. And, it couldn't just be some random person. It had to be someone related to me. So, Vanessa volunteered. Charlene was against it, a-and I didn't know why back then."

Heinz, now close to tears, took a deep breath. Perry wrapped his small hand around two of Heinz's fingers, urging the man to continue.

"The doctors took some of her blood. They analyzed to make sure she was healthy, so - you know- they wouldn't put bad blood in me, so to speak." Heinz swallowed thickly. "I made sure they didn't Vanessa this, but... Her blood...and my blood, they... They didn't match, Perry. That means that Vanessa... Sh-she's not my daughter."

They sat in silence for a moment, as Heinz composed himself and Perry attempted to process what Heinz had just told him.

"My brother, Roger, he donated his blood. I would have detested the idea of his bodily fluids in my body, but as you can imagine I was a little distracted at the time. A-after I was home from the hospital, I confronted Charlene about Vanessa. She could have denied everything and said that the doctors made a mistake, but she that I can tell when a person's lying. She confessed that Vanessa wasn't my daughter. I found out that she'd..." A tear slid down Heinz's cheek, and he quickly wiped it away. "I-I think the guy's name was Paul, or something. I-it's not important."

Perry just sat there in shock. Charlene had cheated on Heinz? That didn't seem like her. Of course, Perry had only met Charlene once or twice...

Heinz continued. "Now, don't think that changed how I feel about Vanessa. She and I may not be related, but she's still my little girl, and I still love her. I always will. As for Charlene..." He sighed. He cleared his throat to keep his voice from breaking. "I may have some - you know - 'feelings' left... I-I really want to be left alone today, Perry. I'll probably have a scheme tomorrow. Probably relating to this."

Heart breaking, Perry comfortingly patted Heinz's hand, hopped off the couch, and headed for the door. Tears stung his eyes when he heard his nemesis say, "Thanks for listening, Perry the Platypus."


So, what do you think? Please review!