4For Misawa Week, Day 2. The prompt I chose was "Hands".
This fic made me realize just how much I enjoy using cheesy romance ideas that you would normally find in a shoujo manga OTL.
Contains spoilers for the manga, but I'm sure most people in the fandom are already aware of this particular spoiler. Still, I'm warning you beforehand if you don't want to be spoiled.
This fic was inspired by an idea given to me by tumblr user, wingspike!
I hope you like it~!
Yips. A deteriorating psychological problem that can affect the overall performance in an athlete. Whether or not the person can fully recover from the yips depends on the individual. But sometimes, a person needs help overcoming it.
...
Ever since their second game against Yakushi that resulted in Seidou's loss, Eijun just hadn't been the same. It was revealed during said game that because of the dead ball during the Inashiro match, he could no longer pitch to the inside corner...something that Eijun himself had been aware of for some time.
But what killed Miyuki, however, was the fact that he hadn't noticed Eijun's now obvious change until during the Yakushi game. Why hadn't he noticed sooner?! The look in Eijun's eyes...the expression on his face and his shaking form as he handed Furuya the ball...and the tears that began to stroll down his cheeks...it was heartbreaking for him to look at. Had he failed as a captain for not noticing sooner? Well, it was too late to lament over it now, but the one thing that he was sure of, was that he would do whatever it took to get Eijun back on his feet.
...
When it came to their daily lives, obviously Miyuki couldn't follow Eijun everywhere, but he did his best to try. When it was time to eat, Miyuki would sit next to him and make sure Eijun ate properly. Sometimes Eijun would sit for hours without touching his food, but Miyuki didn't force him to eat right away...just as long as he ate most of the food on his plate eventually, that was most important.
For bathing, Miyuki would go to the bath at the same time as Eijun, guiding him into the bath and offering to help him was his back. When Eijun didn't say anything, he cautiously used the wash towel, gently washing him and making sure he wasn't hurting in any way.
"...You don't need to baby me...I can do this myself..." Eijun stated in a weak tone, his voice shaking slightly. Miyuki just chuckled lightly and continued washing. "You always need babysitting...I'm just helping you out so be quiet and let me." That was meant as a joke, but Eijun didn't laugh or get irritated like he normally did...he just remained silent. Clenching his teeth, Miyuki tried his best to hold back tears. He couldn't cry in front of Eijun. Not now, when he needed him the most.
As Miyuki brought Eijun back to Eijun's room, he watched as the younger male slowly turned the key and opened the door. The lights were off and it was quiet, so that meant that Kuramochi was currently out of the room for whatever reason. He didn't want to leave Eijun by himself, so he entered the room as well.
As Eijun lied in his bed, Miyuki just stared at him, wondering if he was at least doing better than earlier today. Sighing, he was able to leave...when a hand grabbed onto his. He turned around, surprised to see Eijun holding him, his face not visible to Miyuki's eyes. "...Don't...please..." Those words came out as muffled and tense, and obvious sign that Eijun was trying his hardest not to break down. Miyuki's expression softened, and he complied to what Eijun wanted. "Do you...do you mind if I..." He bit his lower lip, not sure if he wanted to continue his sentence or not. "...Can I lie down next to you?" Eijun didn't respond back, and Miyuki was about to regret asking such a thing, when Eijun slowly moved closer to the wall, giving Miyuki some room next to him. His eyes widened, but he calmly lied down next to Eijun, choosing not to say anything but quietly observing. He could see Eijun's body tensing up, and if he could see Eijun's face, it was probably damp with tears. But the thing that Miyuki noticed the most, were Eijun's hands. They were shaking constantly, and looking back now, they were shaking during lunch and dinner, too.
"...Eijun."
That made Eijun's body tense up even more. Miyuki normally only referred to him by his last name...so why did that change now?
"...Can you...turn around? I want you to face me."
Eijun remained silent. No...no...he couldn't let Miyuki see him like this. See his face like this. Tears strolling down his cheeks, his eyes reddened by frequent crying over the past few days. He didn't want Miyuki of all people to see him in such a vulnerable state. He couldn't...he couldn't...!
"E-Eijun?! Calm down...it's okay..." Miyuki reached over his body and grabbed hold of his hand, effectively stopping the shaking. Eijun's eyes widened, but he didn't turn around. "...I'm here...please...just let me see your face?" Eijun realized he must have begun to shake violently, if Miyuki went this far.
After what felt like an eternity to Miyuki, Eijun finally changed his body position so he was now facing him. Miyuki's expression softened, and he smiled a bit. "That wasn't so hard, right?" He used his free hand to wipe some of the tears off, while his other hand was still holding onto Eijun's.
"M-Miyuki...your hand..." Eijun's voice was shaky, but Miyuki continued smiling and tightened his grip on Eijun's hand ever so slightly, bring the hand up to his lips...gently kissing where he could feel Eijun's pulse. Eijun was shocked. "Miyuki?! W-What are you-" But he made no effort to pull back. "...Your hands were shaking...I want that to stop." Miyuki merely stated as he continued to kiss the same area.
If Eijun's face was red from crying, it became even more red as he watched Miyuki do that. They weren't even in a relationship...he didn't even know how Miyuki felt about him. His feelings for Miyuki were no secret; Haruichi had noticed it a while ago, how he would act differently went around the 2nd year catcher. Even Furuya noticed. And considering how observant he was, he was quite certain that Kuramochi noticed, as well. But Miyuki, being the type to perfectly hide what he was truly feeling...he didn't know if these feelings were mutual. Even while Eijun was watching Miyuki kissing his hand like that, it was still unclear in his mind. Miyuki might just be overly friendly, acting as a surrogate parent to him or something because of what had happened during the game. Yeah, that was it. That had to be it...
Miyuki loved Eijun's hands. Sure, they were slightly calloused and rough, but...if they weren't, then obviously Eijun wasn't pitching properly. He moved from kissing his pulse. to his palm. The inside of his palm was warm to the touch, and he smiled as he kissed where the life lines were most distinct. Moving to the fingers, he kissed the tips of each one, lingering on Eijun's index, middle, and ring finger. His mind went back to some of the games they played before the Inashiro match; how he would watch the way Eijun grips the baseball and throw it with mild ferocity...that was what Miyuki liked, not what he's seen in the past few days.
It was in that moment when Eijun's hand tensed up again, and Miyuki looked up. "...Eijun? What's wrong?"
Eijun bit his lip, trying so hard not to let the tears flow, but he was failing. "You...why would you go this far for me?! D-Don't..." He forcibly ripped his hand from Miyuki's grip, surprising Miyuki. "Don't do this shit if you don't really mean it, you bastard!" He was sure that the entire dorm could hear his yelling, but he didn't care at this point. If Miyuki didn't like him like that, then he shouldn't be pulling him along like this...it was too cruel.
Miyuki quietly listened to Eijun's yelling, patiently waiting until he was done. Once no words came out of the other male's mouth with the exception of muffled sobs, he continued. "...Eijun...do you...do you have feelings for me?"
Eijun's heart stopped. What did Miyuki mean by that...no. No, he knew what he meant. His brain was just having trouble processing the information to the same speed that it was happening.
"W-What...?! No way would I ever like someone like you! Your personality is horrible!" Eijun panicked and just said the first thing that came to his mind. Truth be told, Miyuki should have been offended, and yet...he started smiling. To him, this was the first time in the entire day that Eijun had acted like his normal self. "...Hah. Fine then, don't be honest with yourself. I can wait to hear a confession from you~"
Eijun grew irritated in a rather comical way. "What are you talking about?! I'm being as honest as I can-" He sat up and crossed his arms. "You know what I think? I think it's YOU that has feelings for ME. That's what! So why don't YOU confess?!"
...That took a completely different turn than what Miyuki was expecting. His cheeks turned red slightly, but he maintained his composure...albeit he was feeling a little embarrassed. "...I'm not that great with this sort of thing, Eijun-"
"And since when were you on a first-name basis with me?" Eijun just couldn't let these questions go. Sighing, Miyuki held out his hand. "...Can I see your hand again?" To which Eijun just looked at him suspiciously. "I swear I'm not going to do anything weird, I just want to prove something to you." Miyuki looked at him dead in the eyes, which put Eijun on edge but eventually he complied. Placing his hand in Miyuki's, Miyuki then hummed as he gently caressed Eijun's rough hand with his fingers. "...I'm glad you're back to your old self. I thought I would have had to go to drastic measures to get you back to normal."
"What kind of drastic measures?" Eijun huffed, and Miyuki just grinned slyly. "That's a secret~" Eijun was close to yelling at him again, when Miyuki interrupted. "...Were your hands shaking because of the way you pitched during the Yakushi match...?"
Eijun looked down, his expression turning sorrowful. "...Yes...although, I noticed that they haven't really stopped shaking since the Inashiro match...when I threw the dead ball..."
Miyuki nodded. "...Do you know why?"
After a few minutes of silence (presumably because Eijun was trying to think of an answer), Eijun spoke up. "I guess...it's because pitching requires a steady motion with my hands...if your hands don't work well, then pitching is more difficult, right? Since that match, I just...lost confidence in my pitching, and when I think about that, my hands start shaking violently." It was then that Miyuki noticed a few tears forming in the corners of Eijun's eyes. "Every time I pitch in a match...that scene just flashes before my eyes, whether I want it to or not. I can't...stop it..." The sobbing got worse, and before he knew it, Eijun was clenching the blankets with his free hand, crying into the sheets as if not wanting Miyuki to see him break down like that. But Miyuki didn't care, and scooted closer to Eijun's body. He let go of Eijun's hand, and using his arms, pulled Eijun into his chest, resting his chin on the other's head. He could feel Eijun tense up, but instead of pushing him away like before, he just continued to cry into Miyuki's shirt. Of course Eijun would be this way...he's still young, and he's never had to go through something like this before. Miyuki just let him let go of his emotions, waiting patiently until the sobbing died down before speaking up again.
"...Hey, Eijun? You know why I kissed your hand earlier like that?"
Eijun remained silent, but he could feel the other male shaking his head slowly. "...It's because I love your hands. When you pitch, you pitch with energy. And I can see it just from the way you hold the ball. You've truly learned a lot since entering this school...I'm very proud of you."
To hear such words from Miyuki was almost unreal, and Eijun had to glance up to make sure Miyuki wasn't just making fun of him or something. But...it was the complete opposite. While he was definitely oblivious, even he could see the blush creeping onto Miyuki's cheeks, and the way Miyuki kept averting his gaze at certain parts. So...did that meant that what he was saying, was true...?
Acting mostly on impulse, Eijun brought his hand up to Miyuki's face, and gently caressed his cheek. This action surprised Miyuki, but he let it happen, even leaning his head into the touch. "...I-I...I want to tell you something, Eijun." It was weird, hearing Miyuki stutter like that. But it has happened before, like when he was first made captain of the team.
"I'm not good at expressing my feelings like this, so you better not laugh at me, got it?" When Eijun complied, he continued. "To be honest, I've...I've had feelings for you since before the Inashiro match...I wouldn't say when we first met, since I don't really believe in love at first sight, but...it was pretty damn close." He averted his gaze again. "But I just didn't know how to tell you, and...I would rather remain on good terms with you than confess and risk losing you. It was painful, but I thought it was for the good of the team." He looked at Eijun again. "But...I thought that you had a right to know how I feel. You don't need to answer me right away, but...just know that I can't bear seeing you like this. I want you to get better, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to help you get through it."
Eijun was speechless. Miyuki...had thought about him all that time? This wasn't a joke, was it? No...of course it wasn't. Not even Miyuki had the gall to joke about something like this. His face felt like it was on fire, and he was certain that he would pass out at any given moment.
After what seemed like an eternity for both of them, Eijun finally spoke up. "...Can I see your hand?" Miyuki was mildly surprised, but he allowed Eijun to hold his hand. With this, the situation was reversed.
When Eijun held Miyuki's hand, he could feel that while the palm was rough and calloused like his own, the top of Miyuki's hand was smooth and soft...not like a man's, really. He took the time to stare at it, before focusing his attention on the palm once more. "I like your hands, too...without you there, I'm sure that most of my pitches would fail. You always give me accurate signs...and I trust that you'll catch whatever I throw at you." He smiled. "...You know...how I would love your hands even more?" In the back of his mind, he was hoping that Miyuki wouldn't laugh at him for what he was about to say next.
Miyuki looked confused, so Eijun continued. "...I'd like your hands more, if they were like this." And with one smooth motion, he intertwined their fingers together, holding firmly onto Miyuki's hand in an intimate manner. The action made Miyuki widen his eyes, as if he couldn't believe that Eijun would say such a thing (and who could blame him).
"Eijun...you...?"
There was a moment of silence, before Miyuki spoke up again.
"...Did you get that from one of those shoujo manga series you read?"
'Ack...!' Eijun was shocked so much he almost hit his head on the bottom of the top bunk. It was like he was caught red-handed. "N-No, of course not! Geez, take me seriously for once, would you?!" He huffed. "I regret even saying anything, you stupid bastard!"
Once Eijun calmed down, Miyuki couldn't help but laugh. But it wasn't a teasing laugh, but more like a kindhearted one. "Regardless of where you got the idea from...how should I put it..." He scratched his cheek with his free index finger. "...My heart began racing so fast that I thought it would jump out of my chest."
Upon hearing that, Eijun grinned. "Good, because that's what I was aiming for." They were still holding onto each other's hands, and Eijun calmed down, completely forgetting about his insecurities in that moment. "...I've liked you for a while too, M-Miyuki." He made a sort of pouting face, which, to Miyuki, looked like it was due to him trying to hide his embarrassment. It was rather adorable. "I probably would have fallen for you at first sight...but then you showed me your true personality so those feelings were kind of delayed." Miyuki chuckled at that. "So...what now?"
Miyuki continued smiling, and brought his face closer to Eijun. "...Can I kiss you...?"
If Eijun couldn't hear his heartbeat pounding, he could definitely hear it now. For it was pounding at a rapid pace, and was so loud he was sure that someone outside the room could hear it. When he tried speaking, he realized that his voice refused to work. All he could do, was nod.
Miyuki's eyes shined, and he slowly closed the distance between himself and Eijun...before their lips connected in a gentle way. Eijun felt like he would die, and Miyuki could feel his own heart beating out of his chest with more ferocity than ever. The kiss was chaste and didn't take that long before they released, but it still felt like heaven to both of them.
They stared at each other, neither of them wanting to speak for the longest time. It was as if they were taking in every single part of the other's being, from their appearance, to their essence, and of course, their touch, for their hands were still intertwined and feeling more comfortable than before. It was a really nice, calming feeling...Miyuki wished this moment could last forever, and he was sure that Eijun felt the same way.
"So...does this mean that...I mean..." Eijun fumbled over his words. "...Are we...uhh..."
Miyuki chuckled. "...If you mean whether or not we're officially a couple now...I don't mind." He said it casually, but in his heart and his mind, he was ecstatic. "We should get some sleep though...I just noticed but it's past midnight...we need to get up early."
Eijun was too happy to concentrate on the last bit of the conversation, but he got the general idea of what Miyuki was saying. "S-So, can I call you...K-Kazuya, then?"
Miyuki stared at him. 'It should be illegal for someone to be this cute.' Once he calmed his heart down, he smirked. "...Only when we're alone...I don't want the others to make a big deal out of it...at least, not yet. We'll tell them when the time comes...unless they find out anyway, which I wouldn't put it past them."
Eijun nodded in agreement, before taking his hands to remove Miyuki's glasses, putting them on the desk next to the foot of the bed. "Why'd you do that?" As a response, Eijun rolled his eyes. "You DID say we should get some sleep, right? You can't sleep with your glasses on, you know."
"...Cheeky. I'll have to teach you how to properly talk to your senpai." Miyuki smirked at him, to which Eijun laughed. "Yeah yeah..." He then quickly kissed Miyuki on the lips, which caught the other male off guard. "...Goodnight, Kazuya."
Miyuki could swear he has never been happier than he was in that moment. "...Goodnight, Eijun." And then lied down together, Miyuki's arms around Eijun's smaller frame, and their eyes slowly closed.
...
Kuramochi had just gotten done with extra batting practice with Maezono and Haruichi, so he was walking back to his dorm room.
'Otouto-kun is relentless with his bat...he's even more terrifying than Ryou-san, despite being the younger sibling. Although he's still no where near as skilled as Ryou-san when it comes to his overall play style...' Who knows though, given enough experience, he was sure that Haruichi would surpass Ryosuke in the near future...something that he felt bittersweet about, but it was for the best of the team.
He had finally got to the door to his room, and opened it, expecting Eijun to be either asleep, or getting ready to go for a late night jog. He was shocked to find that Eijun wasn't the only person in their room. Upon closer inspection, he was shocked to see that Miyuki was there as well, and they were...embracing?! A vein popped in Kuramochi's head and he was about to drop-kick them out of that bed, but he stopped himself at the last minute. He noticed that Eijun's face looked calm, which was the first time his face wore that expression all day. Not even he could bring himself to kick him after seeing that.
"...Tch...I don't know what Miyuki did, but whatever it was, it sure worked..." He whispered under his breath. '...It's about time they realized for their feelings for each other, anyway. I was getting tired of their constant tip-toeing around the situation.' Well, there was nothing he could do. He REALLY didn't want to sleep in the room if they were like that, so he quickly wrote a note for them and left it on the desk, next to Miyuki's glasses. 'Guess I better see if Zono and Otouto-kun have room for one more person.' And he quietly closed the door, locking it.
Eijun and Miyuki stirred slightly, but they quickly fell back asleep. When they wake up, a simple, yet forceful note would be waiting for them:
Miyuki and Bakamura!
I'll be sleeping in Zono and Otouto-kun's room tonight. If I come back to find the room in disarray because of any FUNNY BUSINESS, I'm going to kill the both of you, got it?!
And to Sawamura, expect a swift kick to your ass after practice later today!
- Kuramochi.
Poor Kuramochi~
In the manga, after the third years retire, Kuramochi refers to Haruichi as "Otouto-kun", which basically means "little brother". This is to distinguish between Haruichi and Ryosuke. (He doesn't refer to Haruichi by his first name until MUCH later in the series, during their 3rd match against Yakushi).
I hope you enjoyed reading! Reviews are much appreciated, as always ^^