It was 1984. America had gone crazy, changed his name to Oceania, and taken over England and some other countries. He had also grown a mustache to show how evil he was, and he was Big Brother and he's WATCHING YOU. He was currently in the run-down flat where he had England and Canada and the polar bear in a cage because they were his b*****s now.

"Hey England your name is Airstrip One now."

"Nah, man, f*** that."

Then America whipped him and was like "What's your name?!"

"England!"

*whip!* "What's your name?!"

"Dude that hurt…"

"What's your name?!"

"Fine its...whatever you said a minute ago."

All records showing that he had ever been called anything else were destroyed, and anyone who didn't think he had always been Airstrip One was taken away by the thought police.

Then America said, "good." and put the whip back in the whip cabinet. Then he said, "Ok, your name is AirSTRIP One for a reason."

"Why do you keep putting so much emphasis on strip?" Airstrip One asked nervously.

Oceania got out his boombox and started playing fun, sexy music because they still had boomboxes in 1984. "Take your clothes off!"

"No I have self-respect!"

"If you don't do it RATS WILL EAT YOUR FACE!" he gestured toward the cage-helmety-thing with rats in it that was sitting next to the boombox.

So England started dancing and took his shirt off, and then his pants. America rubbed his mustache and laughed evilly, and put some ones in his new slave's cheetah-print g-string.

Then China kicked the door in and killed them both with machine guns akimbo.

HAPPY END