15D: Unless I fly to Japan, seduce Masashi Kishimoto, and convince him to marry me, I will never own Naruto.
S: In which kittens are cuddled, Neji despairs, and Tenten is to blame.
N: All reason aside, this was fun to write. Contains cavity-inducing sweetness and probable OOC. My apologies for ruining your teeth, I really am sorry.
Of Men and Their Kittens
Chapter 1 – In Which Sleep Is Lost
Written By
Sound Showers
"Absolutely not."
Tenten, he thought incredulously, had lost her mind. In fact, he seriously considered slamming the door in her face. Understandable, seeing as his teammate really should have known better than to ask such an idiotic question. For one thing, it was two o'clock in the morning. Secondly, while Tenten may have been his teammate and closest friend, she still had about ten seconds before he planned on going back to bed.
"Neji, I swear to god, if you don't help me I will cut off your hair!"
He shut the door anyways, pinching the bridge of his nose. Then he realized what she had just said.
"Tenten..." Neji growled, reopening the door, his features arranged in what could only be described as an exhausted scowl. "Don't touch my hair," he murmured vaguely, concluding that his brain didn't function properly when he was woken at such an hour.
If she hadn't been in the process of freezing her ass off, Tenten would have laughed at his unusually dishevelled appearance. Admittedly, he did look rather adorable with his hair swept back in a messy ponytail, but then she remembered she was supposed to be mad at him -right, pompous ass- and the kunoichi's glare quickly intensified.
"You've got five seconds, Neji..." She warned, wedging a kunai between the door so that he couldn't close it properly.
This, Neji decided, is idiotic. I will not-
"Two..." Tenten's voice grew dangerously soft, her bandaged fingers curling around another pointed object.
"I'm not going to help you take care of (he winced slightly) kittens. What were you thinking?"
"I don't know what the hell I was thinking, but I do know that I can't look after all six of them!" Throwing her hands up in exasperation, Tenten leaned heavily against the doorframe, ignoring Neji's small noise of protest. "And I'm not asking Lee," she added as an afterthought.
To be fair, Neji wholeheartedly agreed with her. Unsurprisingly, their spandex-clad teammate had developed an infamous habit of befriending exotic creatures, several of which he attempted to smuggle back with him. The Hyuuga grumbled something incoherent, cursing his atrocious luck.
"What makes you think I'll be of any use in this matter?" he inquired blearily, wondering if bashing his head against the wall would solve anything. "Ask Sakura... or Ino, I really don't care." He was fighting a loosing battle (something Neji was never capable of wining when Tenten demanded things of him at two o'clock in the morning) and the notion left him cranky. That's it, he thought dazedly, I choose the wall.
Rolling her eyes, Tenten jabbed a finger into his chest, punctuating each word with a sharp prod. "Just. Say. Yes." she huffed, making a wild grab for the prodigy's prized locks. "I can't ask either of them because Ino's allergic and Sakura's got a broken leg!" Then, as if to further torture him, Tenten added, "And also because I blew up my apartment."
"You what?!"
Of all the possible answers she could have given him, blowing up one's apartment had not crossed his mind. Given Tenten's love of weaponry (which ranged from the standard kunai to the completely absurd, such as frying pans), Neji was forced to admit that, as ridiculous as it sounded, blowing up her apartment had been a disaster just waiting to happen. Case in point the homeless, and sheepish-looking weapon mistress standing on his doorstep.
At two o'clock in the bloody morning.
"I blew up my apartment, Neji." Tenten chided, as though she were telling a disobedient child that, why yes, one plus one does equal two, and no, that chunk of dirt does not belong in your mouth. "Think, giant mushroom cloud, because that's essentially what happened!"
Finding he didn't have anything concrete to say, Neji sighed, reluctantly moving away from the door so that she could pass.
"Hn."
The look Tenten gave him as she ducked under his arm was one of extreme gratitude, and some mortifying part of him decided that she ought to blow up her apartment more often. He might have forgiven her for waking him at such an ungodly hour if she hadn't forced a box of kittens into his arms. Trying to look as dignified as he could with an armful of -he blinked- purring, fluff, Neji rounded on Tenten.
"Tenten..."
"Neji."
"Tenten!"
"..."
"..."
"...Gai-sensei?"
At this, Neji's scowl became positively murderous. "They can't stay here. If Lady Hinata were to see them, I'd spend the rest of my life living in a house full of... cats."
Tenten didn't like how he empathized the word 'cat', it suggested a significant dislike for aforementioned creature. "What do you have against cats, anyways?" He couldn't possibly find them as repulsive as he did canines! Besides, she thought, these were kittens! Surely even Neji had a soft spot for their cute factor.
Evidently not.
There was a moment of silence in which the hyuuga prodigy deposited the cardboard box some few feet away. Then, he turned to her with a weary, somewhat exasperated look. "I'm going back to bed," he stated bluntly, running a hand through his tangled hair. "You can take the room adjacent my own, it's not used anymore."
Nodding, Tenten stooped, picking up the makeshift cat carrier, murmuring something that sounded a lot like, "Great. Thanks, Neji."
The scent of gunpowder clung to her skin like a smoky perfume, and he wrinkled his nose, somehow managing to look deprecating even in his dishevelled state. "The answer is still no," he gestured at the cardboard box in her hands. "Some of us value the limited amount of sleep we get." In reply, she merely stuck her tongue out at him, tipping the box slightly so that it's (admittedly, very cute) contents were made visible.
"We'll see about that."
N: So there you have it, Chapter 1 done and done! Leaving a review is entirely optional, and I don't want to pressure you into it, but they really are appreciated. Up next: Chapter 2