This is a Princess Bride/Harry Potter AU Crossover thingie for Lizziebee (TheNextFolchart). I'm her secret santa at Hogwarts! :D Now, because she's amazing and wonderful and also my secret sibling (and I can't make this only one chapter), this will definitely be a multi-chap. Hopefully it'll be done by Christmas.

Also, since it's Princess Bride, I used Lizzie as the little grandson. She isn't usually against my fluff. That was just cuz the grandson doesn't like kissing. (And we can't have Princess Bride without pulling the grandfather/grandson moments)

Secret Santa Exchange on Hogwarts: Written for Lizziebee!

Countdown to Christmas: Day 12, "Twelve Days of Christmas"

Greek Mythology Competition: Uranus (write something AU).


Lizziebee curled up in her bed, sipping hot cocoa and soup as she lounged on many pillows. It was cold out, and she was sick, so her friend Melody had come over to read to her.

"Read me something new, please!" she said, burrowing deeper into her blankets. "And none of that fluffy shit. I want something angsty."

(Also with a lot of use of the parenthetical).

Melody picks up the book she's brought with her. "What about this?"

"Is there kissing in there?" Lizzie asks suspiciously, glaring at the beautiful green cover. It was decorated with the items from the '12 days of Christmas' carol, and the title was embossed in gold lettering, spelling out 'The 12 Days of a Wood Christmas'.

Mel doesn't answer her, hoping to avoid trouble.

"Oh, Mel, not right now! Come on, pleeease!"

Mel smiles and opens the book. "Just the first chapter, alright? I think you'll enjoy it."

"Mel. Really."

"'Once upon a time..."


On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

"Oliver! Come on, we're going to be late!" Katie tapped her foot impatiently from the doorway of their shared flat. She and her best friend decided to room together, as they both played for Puddlemere, therefore sharing the same schedules. It helped when your flat mate kept the same insane hours as you did.

Oliver ran down the stairs, hair still wet from his shower and shoes half off his feet. "Don't worry, Kit-Kat, we won't be late. There's a reason wizards can Apparate, you know."

Katie huffed in exasperation. "Just open the damn door, idiot."

Oliver opened the door, gallantly bowing to her. "As you wish, my lady," he said with a wink.

They were headed to the Annual Quidditch League Winter's Ball, and the entire team was expected to be there in two minutes. Katie grabbed Oliver's hand and spun on the spot. They arrived with a pop! at the gala.

"Let's go find some seats, shall we?"

"As you wish."

Katie blushed, dropping his hand quickly when she realized she was still holding it.

(She couldn't stop thinking about how right it felt).


"Hey, Katie," a voice said behind her, and she turned to notice Cedric Diggory standing awkwardly behind her, hands stuffed into the pockets of his dress robes. Her blood runs cold with anger at the sight of her ex-boyfriend, and she clenches her fists.

"Hi, Diggory. What would you want?" she asked coldly, and he flinched at her anger.

"I... I'm sorry. Believe me. I never meant to cheat on you, it just sort of... happened."

Katie raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really. Well, forgive me then for being so easy to cheat on," she muttered sarcastically, and Cedric took a deep breath, nodding his head.

"I deserve that. Yea... but I wanted to see if I could get a second chance."

"You're here to ask me for a second chance?"

"How bout we start with a dance and go from there?" He looked hopeful and she glared at him, brushing past him coldly, knocking his shoulder as she walked past.

"How bout you just leave me alone?!" Katie hissed over her shoulder.

(Funny how someone can be so beautiful when she's in so much pain.)


"Oliver Wood, dance with me. Now." Katie held her hand out with an indignant huff, and Oliver set his drink down with a questioning look.

"As you wish."

He listened to her rant, insulting Cedric, insulting the party, their neighbors in the next flat over, the entire Christmas holiday. Finally, she looked at him crossly and spat out, "Well, don't just stand there. Say something!"

He grinned. "As you wish."

"Oh come on, can't you say anything else?!" She broke away from the circle of his arms, striding back towards the Apparation point.

"Katie!" Oliver caught her arm with concern, noticing the tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

"Just... Just take me home, Oliver. Please. Just take me home."

He wrapped a comforting arm around her, letting her cry into his dress robes. "As you wish, Kates. As you wish."

(Even with her face pressed so close to his heart, she still couldn't hear it beat with his love for her.)


He sat her down with a cup of hot cocoa and a box of tissues to wipe her eyes.

(Heartbreak brings the best out of people).

"Why are you so nice to me, Oliver? I don't deserve your friendship. I've been nothing but horrible to you all evening."

(It also brings out the worst).

"Do you really not see it, Katie?"

He looked at her, really looked at her, those bright blue eyes shining with unshed tears and the golden hair falling from it's updo. The royal blue dress crumpled and tear stained, yet still accenting her curvy figure.

(Sometimes a look is worth a thousand words).

Katie stared right back at her flat mate, heart pounding. She took in his soft hair, chocolate brown eyes, puppy-like grin. The boy she'd known since she was eleven had turned into this amazing man before her, one she didn't know.

(Sometimes a look is all it takes).

"Oliver, come here," she whispered, and he crouched down beside her chair, his mouth forming the shape of words she knows he's saying, but cannot quite here.

(Even if she can't understand, she still knows what he means).

He never broke eye contact with her, and she lost the battle, falling into the lovely pools of his brown eyes.

"Oliver... kiss me."

His lips drew nearer. "As you wish," he whispers, and then they are kissing, and the kiss is perfect, and everyone said that this kiss beat all the others that had ever happened in the entire history of humanity, including the ones between Cleopatra and-


"Mel, really? I thought I said I wasn't in the mood for fluff!"

Melody stops reading, looking over the top of the book at Lizzie. "That's what you asked for, Lizziebee. You wanted fluff for Christmas. Besides, this isn't really that bad. There's going to be lots of fighting and dueling and some really awesome stuff with the Weasley twins..."

Lizzie settles back in the pillows, trying to hide her grin. "Well... I guess it's ok. I mean. Just, the kissing can be a bit 'ew' at times but... if there's going to be lots of fighting, that can be fine."

"Good. Shall I move on to Chapter Two then?"

Lizzie nods, taking a sip of her tea.

"Katie and Oliver had a wonderful year together..."