Gosh, I suddenly feel like there is a flock of butterflies coming out of hibernation in my stomach. The show starts in about 20 minutes and I still don't know if my feather headpiece for Thataway is where I left it. Aaron and Bobby just started moving the rehearsal piano out to the wings. God, I love how I can stare into those ocean blue eyes and not be ashamed. Ashamed for it being my fault I am the one who left him. It's been, what, all of ten minutes since we made up and I long for him so much. I've got a smaller frame than him so it feels so wonderful to have him hold me tight to him again and sink into him. Talk about distracting tonight, huh? This feels kind of creepy wearing Jessica's costume. After she died they didn't have time to make new costumes so it worked well that we were about the same size. I am excited though, I really missed the stage.
"Georgia, you're… so beautiful. I love you, I missed you so much. I was stupid for letting you slip away." Aaron ran up and whispered in my ear. As he embraced me I could smell his cologne on his neck. I remember he was wearing that same cologne when we first met in '49. So many memories get stirred up with that stuff, mostly good.
"Thanks, I really hope I can pull it off tonight. I'm nervous," I admitted as my cheek brushed his.
" I know sweetheart, if you wanted me to switch places with you I would in a heartbeat. Though I'm not sure if the audience will like a male Madame Marion. Break a leg and if you need me I'll being the one playing the piano," He jogged off to the wings because there was only about five minutes until the overture was going to start playing. I chuckled at his remark as I imagined him dressed as the saloon keeper singing Thataway. He was going to be playing some of it tonight. In all the mix up with the murders we had no piano player for tonight's show. It's our music and it is just wonderful to hear him play it, it's special.
After the show, before the curtain finished closing completely, Aaron ran up to me again and spun me in a circle knocking the bouquet of red roses right out of my hands. He is such a strong kisser. All of my muscles relaxed but tensed all at the same time. This is what it felt like to be alive again, to be wanted by that one person. The last several years have been so depressing since the divorce. I shouldn't have felt that way because I wanted it. It crushes me to have spent the last several years paying for this night with my sorrows when it should have been this way the whole time. I could barely breathe between kisses but it was okay, I loved it. I loved him.
We made our way back to my apartment. As soon as we could escape the after party anyways. We left because Aaron was "sick," love-sick maybe. It was all just semantics, we both really knew how we felt about each other. It was all like when we first met, fresh and new. Love is strange isn't it. He ignored me for so long and yet I thought about him every day. Honestly I feel like a teenager again, giddy and excited.
"I am so sorry Georgia, I've gone through hell the last couple of years without you. I had no idea how much I really needed you," he spoke, staring into my eyes, grasping my shoulders to make sure I was listening. I missed having my face that close to his, having his warm breath on my cheek. Aaron broke his gaze and put on that childish, crooked smile he always used when he was planning something I didn't know. It surprised me when he picked me up and cradled me in his arms. He laid me on the bed and threw his suit coat haphazardly in the corner of the small room. He started to unbutton his white, cotton, dress shirt but I stopped him.
"Come here, I'll get it," teasing him,showing him I wanted to take my time and show him what he'd been missing. Each button coming undone neat and slow. I was only about half way done when he leaned over and kissed me again. This time even more passionately, more breathtaking. He was desperate to have me again. All his moves were quick and sloppy, slowing down eventually realizing that he wasn't going to lose me again. We were one, tangled together beneath some white linen sheets. I rested my head on his rising and falling chest. We both fell asleep, waking up the the birds chirping cheerily outside. The window was slightly open so the ivory curtains fluttered in the breeze, dancing to the dawn chorus. Aaron was no longer by my side but I figured he was downstairs with my piano since I could hear him playing it. I don't even know why I own a piano. I can't even play the piano. After waking up enough to get out of bed, still smelling his scent on the sheets I walked over to the vanity where a single, red rose was sitting with some papers. I usually use the vanity to write rather than do my hair and make-up. The one on the very top was lyrics written out on parchment in the form of a letter. At the bottom the letters were smudged from tears, spotting other places as well. They were the lyrics to Thinking Of Him. It was plainly obvious those lyrics were for him even though he hadn't realized it at the time they were written. Those were his tears.
I pulled on slippers and a kimono style robe Aaron bought me once on one of our old Broadway tours and headed quietly downstairs. I wanted to sneak up behind him so I could wrap my arms around his neck. I narrowly avoided the creak in the staircase. I always thought that the creak meant something more than just a broken step. I had never fixed it either. Maybe I was just ignoring the fact that all this time I needed him just as much as he needed me.
"I really did think of you all this time," I whispered in his ear as I leaned over his shoulder. He just stared blankly at his hands on the keys for a moment. They had stopped playing so he could hear what I had to say. Then he turned around slowly, my face in his hands and speaking solemnly he told me the dearest thing on his mind.
" I missed the music I made with you. I missed my friend and partner and most of all I missed my wife. Without you it always felt like half of me was always… missing."
"It's okay, I'm not leaving, you're not leaving, it's okay," I assured him the best I could and pecked him lightly on the cheek. We spent the spent the rest of the morning talking about ideas for a new show we could write together. Maybe we even do some performing just the two of us. As we talked he spent the whole time caressing my hand, his hands soft and started to stream down my face because I knew he meant every word. I felt so safe with him with me here and now.
"Please forgive me Georgia. I'm so sorry, I shut you out to do my work. I thought I could work better by myself but I couldn't, forgive me," Aaron sobbed into my left shoulder quietly and I returned an embrace. Finally he broke to the point I broke down and felt the pain I felt. Later that morning we took a walk over to Central park stopping on the way for tea and coffee at a quaint diner we used to go to when we first met. We discussed the future of Robin Hood and our own future too. I think we should go on to perform, just the two of us. I think together we could really be a tough act to follow.