I walk away leaving her in tears. I feel strange sensations running through me as she comes closer and puts her hand on mine to comfort me and asks me to trust the feelings of her love.
"Believe me," she says. "I love you, Ranveer. I always have! I know my faults and mistakes. Please forgive me."
Forgive her? How am I supposed to forgive her? She ruined me and expects forgiveness! How strange is that! However, she does not realize the love I have for her. It hasn't changed and never shall, but her every move and act wants me to go away- from her and the entire world. More than her betrayal her pretense hurts taking every whit of life out of me. She does not realize how badly my heart has yearned for what she says now, yet the irony is that I hardly believe what she has to say.
Her eyes express a loving concern but my mind forces me to believe it is a fallacy...an illusion which is not meant to come true. I knew she never loved me and could not love me. All I had expected was a bit of respect for the relationship we shared. She scoffed it and proved how blind I had been all along. Only a fool could go on holding on to a love that was not meant to be his. Her touch expresses gentle warmth that heals all my wounds, but it all seems far less than reality for it never was meant to come true.
She looks at me, and my heart flutters within me as if it has a reason to move with joy and blossom with all the happiness again. I make it understand somehow that it must not make the same mistakes again, and should learn to remain wilted as it is. If broken now, I'm afraid it will not survive a single blow again.
I laugh at the strange fate of mine. How life, although for a while, provided a flicker of hope that Ishani could love me as the people say true love never goes in vain, but I struggle to see why my love, after having gotten that chance, was thrown back as if it was merely a useless object?
Should I say it's another game plan of God to test my endurance that I wasn't granted death despite desiring it that night? It still prickles my very soul to think of that unpleasant moment when I saw the scratches on her body that were the inherent proves that love is not always meant to give happiness. My heart shatters into innumerable pieces even now whenever the thought comes to me. No matter how much I try to get over the love I have I cannot. I so much wish now I had never loved her, for the love only tears me apart. I find no rest, no happiness, and no life. It seems the life has ended ever since I came home...alive.
I have done my best to ignore every emotion my heart feels in her presence but at the end of the day it gives away and I'm left with the remnants of the broken dreams and memories of my lost love.