Felicity entered Ray's office unsure of what exactly she was going to say to him. She was angry, disappointed and confused.
Ray was supposed to be a good guy. Somebody who could give her a normal life, who would love her and care about her, somebody who would put her first. Ray was supposed to be a really good guy. He would never hurt a fly, she thought. But he did. And he wanted to do more than just hurt. Ray basically barbequed one of her closest friends and he tried to kill her... he tried to kill Oliver.
He was sitting behind his desk blankly staring into his laptop. He didn't register Felicity right away, so she made herself known by clearing her throat. He looked up immediately and the look on his face screamed anger, sadness, fear, pain and confusion all at the same time. Felicty was hoping for a civil conversation between two partners who both want to figure things out and make amends, but when she played the entire day in her head again, she let her emotions take hold of her.
"You know... I was gonna come here and apologize for not telling you the truth, and hopefully talk it out... just you and me, an honest conversation..." she said as she slowly walked to the black couch and sat down.
"But then I realized two quite important things... First, I have nothing to apologize for. It wasn't... it still isn't my secret to tell, Ray. I have sworn to myself that I would never betray Oliver and my friends by sharing our secret. What we do is very important to me. Oliver does GOOD for this city, he protects it, he makes sure its people feel at least somewhat safe here. They trust the Arrow to keep them safe. I trust him with my life... and I would never do anything to put our mission in risk." she said firmly and then fell silent for a few seconds.
Ray couldn't help but jump in his chair a little bit when Felicity suddenly stood up and closed the distance between them.
"The second thing... is what really hurt me." He could feel his heart stop for a second and then start beating real fast. The thought of hurting Felicity was something that truly scared him and was never his intention.
"You were going to expose Oliver. You were going to go to the police and reveal his true identity to the world... You didn't care that exposing him means also exposing me. See, the thing is... if Oliver goes down, I go down. You didn't even stop to think about that, did you?" The look of realization on Ray's face told Felicity that she was right and that was all she needed.
"That's what I thought..." she nodded knowingly and with sadness in her eyes she left the office.
Oliver just wanted to make sure Roy was alright and the city was safe for the night. He dragged his feet across the lair to turn the light off but he stopped in the middle when he heard the familiar sound of Felicity's heels hitting the staircase.
"Hey." he said quietly with a smile but his eyes very quickly moved away from her and found a dirty spot on the floor to stare at.
"You're mastering the art of avoiding eye contact too?, huh?" she sighed and dropped her purse on a table.
That certainly made Oliver look up again. "What?"
"What are you doing here? I thought you were..." he asked but Felicity cut him off.
"Well, Ray and I are no longer 'a something' so..." she said matter-of-factly while she was waiting for her computers to wake up. She was now sitting in her chair facing away from Oliver.
It took a second for Oliver to recover from the initial shock. Felicity and Palmer were over. He couldn't quite figure out how he was supposed to feel about it. Yes, he was glad Palmer was now out of the picture, BUT Felicity got hurt and he never wants to see her get hurt. In any way. In that moment, all he wanted was for her to turn around so he could see how she was feeling.
"I'm sorry to hear that."
It came out as almost a whisper but Felicity still heard him loud and clear. Her chair spun around rather slowly.
"No, you're not." she said and Oliver expected her to be bitter about it, but she surprised him with a calm, honest tone and a soft smile on her face.
"You're right." he admitted and slowly started closing the distance between them.
"You stop right there." Felicity sighed and held her hand up to stop him from coming any closer.
The confused look on Oliver's face made her laugh, but she shook it off quickly. There were so many things on her mind. Ray, Oliver, Ra's, Captain Lance... she closed her eyes for a brief moment to collect herself and figure out what she wanted to say. Oliver waited patiently a few feet away from her giving her the time she needed and deserved, it was the least he could do for her.
"All this time... ever since you told me you loved me... all I wanted from you was to fight for me. Because I knew you wanted to. I could... I can see it in your eyes. And I was so angry with you because you wouldn't. You would just keep pushing me away..."
"Felicity..." Oliver couldn't fight the urge to explain to her once again that...
"I love you, Oliver." He got caught SO off guard by that. How many times had he dreamt about her saying those words to him.
"And every time you say you can't be with me, it hurts so much I can't breathe... But I realized that... I've never really fought for us either. I just accepted the fact that you didn't love me enough or too much, it doesn't really matter, to be with me. And that was it. So who am I to judge and be angry, huh?"
Still unable to put together a coherent sentence, Oliver blinked a couple of times before closing his eyes and sighing heavily. This surely wasn't happening. It was all just a dream, a hallucination or maybe he died again, for real this time. Felicity left the safety of her chair and closed the remaining distance separating the two of them. He felt her fingers wrap around his wrists and he couldn't keep his eyes closed any longer. What he saw when he opened them knocked the breath out of him. Felicity stood so close he could feel her breath on his skin. He could feel her chest rising and falling and it made him shiver. Felicity's eyes were filled with tears now, but also with love and hope. It was the most beautiful sight for him.
"This is me fighting for us, Oliver. Right here, right now. This is me telling you that I love you. I didn't choose this miserable joke of a life where you and I are not together. I didn't choose Ray over you. You made those choices for me when you decided you can't be both Oliver Queen and The Arrow. You need to realize that you are one and the same. There can't be the Arrow without Oliver Queen and Oliver Queen can't exist without The Arrow. It's the same with me. I can't love you without loving The Arrow! We need to stop wasting our time, Oliver. You almost died way too many times and every time you did, I couldn't help but think about all the chances we didn't take in life. You can be gone tomorrow. Hell, I can be gone tomorrow. Life is too short and I don't wanna wake up every morning and think about how much I want you to be the first thing I see when I open my eyes. I want you to be there, in my bed, every morning and every night. For the rest of my days, if possible. Please, for once, forget about what you think is right, what you think you should do, stop making decisions for me. You think it's not safe for us to be together, but I can get hurt regardless. I think the scar on my shoulder is a great proof of that. Just... consider your feelings and desires. If you love me like you say you do, and if you want to be with me... then here I am, Oliver. It's that simple. I'm right here, I love you and I wanna be with you, because life's precious and I don't care how many days I have left, I wanna spend them loving you. Don't you?"
In that moment Oliver saw the future flash before his eyes. Felicity. She's his future.
He cupped her face slowly, his thumb running along her cheek bones wiping away her tears. They gazed into each other's eyes breathing heavily. Felicity's hands left Oliver's wrists and moved to grab the sides of his sweatshirt pulling him closer.
"Please, fight with me, Oliver." she whispered against his chest.
Oliver couldn't fight his feelings anymore. There was nothing he wanted more than to hold Felicity in his arms and call her 'his'. He leaned down and when she met him halfway, their lips met in a soft yet passionate kiss. Slow and loving, gentle and warm. It was everything words couldn't express. It was the months of longing, the sleepless nights, all the tears they'd shed.
Oliver was the one to break the kiss, but only to take the breath they both needed. He pulled back a little bit, their foreheads still touching. He could now see the soft smile on her face. He'd never seen her smile like that before and it warmed his heart to know that he was the reason behind that. Felicity wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug just like she'd done a number of times before. Only this time he hugged her back just as tightly and he promised to stay.