A/N: This is my first KP fanfic! I just binge-watched the whole series for the first time since high school, and I just had to indulge my fantasies a little here. This is also probably the shortest finished fanfic I've ever completed, at around 12k words.
Just for those who haven't read my other works, I have a strict moral fanfic author code as of 2012: I never post a fic that isn't 100% finished. That means this story is done, and will be posted in the form of three chapters over the course of the next week.
This story is rated M for sex. Sexy sex. It's there, I promise. I don't just jump into smut in my stories- you gotta work for it a bit.
ALSO, I know the fanbase is a bit small here, but I really appreciate reviews! More reviews might even encourage me to add to this story a bit more. It's finished now, but there is definitely room for another chapter or two if I can see people are interested.
Anyways, onward with the story!
Chapter One: The Expected Outcome
Kim went left.
Shego feigned right, then dropped and slammed the hero with a mean left hook just below her ribs. Kim doubled over, groaning, watching as Shego drew back her hand for another blow- this time open-clawed and all the more deadly. Just as the green-clad villain was about to slice her up, Kim ducked to the floor, swiping her leg out long and bringing Shego's feet out from under her. She howled in frustration as she hit the floor, then quickly somersaulted backwards a few yards away.
Good. Kim needed the extra moment to catch her breath. She was really off her game today- these fights with Shego were usually pretty intense, but also much shorter. Kim was having trouble finishing things- probably because she was so exhausted from her cheer practice.
"Wasn't your evil-reputation ruined by saving the world, Shego? I thought you'dve given up this game by now."
"You wish, Kimmie!" snarled the other girl, her dark lips curling upwards into a cunning smirk. "In fact, most bad-guy types don't exactly fancy, you know, getting destroyed along with the world."
"We're more popular than ever!" came the unreasonably upbeat voice of Dr. Drakken from his spot by- predictably- some giant laser-like machine. Usually, this would be Ron's cue to accidentally distract the villain's scheme in some subtle manner, but unfortunately Ron was… late.
He was late a lot these days, though of course he had fairly good reasons.
The laser fired, and Kim tucked and rolled away. She manged to keep ahead of the laser's blasts of sharp green crackling light, finally dodging behind the relative safety of a cement pillar. This particular lair was rather well-built. It would probably take a hell of an explosion to knock down the solid-looking structure.
Kim had no doubt a large explosion would, most likely, be in her future. It was fate.
"But you both proved you could do so much good! You're so… bad at being bad," Kim called out, mostly just to rile up her foes. She really hadn't expected the duo to give up villainy, despite how well they had all worked together to fight off the alien invaders last summer. It was just their nature. Drakken and Shego tried to conquer the world, and Kim and Ron tried to save it. It was just the way things were.
Except Ron wasn't present this time around.
Kim knew she only had seconds before Drakken stopped fruitlessly firing his laser at the pillar long enough for Shego to slip by and attack her again. She pulled out her Kimmunicater, the familiar beep hardly audible over the buzzing of the large weapon.
"Wade?" she tried, gazing at the short boy hopefully.
"No word from Ron yet, Kim. And since we were so caught up in the moral implications of keeping him chipped…"
"I had to tell him! Really, now that he can take care of himself I didn't think we needed it anymore, either…"
True, it was a little bit of a "gray area" in terms of right and wrong, but having Ron chipped by Wade had been hella useful in the past. Still, it was wrong. Definitely wrong.
Last summer Ron had managed to get himself captured by some lame new cat-themed villain, and when Kim had found him so quickly he had finally started asking questions. He had already managed to take the "Whisker Caper" out by himself, anyways, by the time she had arrived, which only added to her guilt about the secret.
"Just keep me posted," Kim finished with a sigh, pocketing the machine.
It was rough, living so far away from her boyfriend. It was even rougher living so far away from her sidekick and crime-fighting companion. They could always schedule dates, but you could never really pencil-in when a crazed world-conquering baddie was going to make a move.
The laser was suddenly silent, and sure enough Shego came tumbling through the air from the other side of the pillar. Kim dodged to the side as Shego attacked with her green-glowing open palm, and the enemy's nails left huge gouging claw-marks in the cement pillar where Kim's head had been moments before.
Their battle continued, a series of flying kicks and flips and tumbles. Kim wasn't sure what Drakken's plan was, or what his laser would actually do if it hit her, so she made sure to keep Shego strategically placed between her body and the machine. It wasn't as easy as it sounded, especially when the henchmen arrived.
That would have been Ron's other job. He distracted the main baddie, and he took out the small-timers. The henchmen. These days, Ron had no trouble at all wiping the lair with even the biggest minions, thanks to his monkey kung-fu skills.
Yeah, those abilities would have come in handy dozens of times during high school, but only after defeating Warhok did he actually figure out how to consciously use them. Which would be incredibly useful if he wasn't so late!
"KP!" shouted a very familiar and welcome voice, and Kim breathed an internal sigh of relief. She was getting a little overwhelmed by herself.
There he was, holding the second floor railing and leaning over to look at her. He seemed slightly out of breathe. Rufus was clinging to his very messy blond hair, also looking flustered. They must have had a hell of a time getting to Drakken's new Greenlandic lair.
"Ron! Get Drakken!" She wasted no time with greetings- they could get to that later. They hadn't met for close to two weeks now, but she knew she had to stay focused. Another blazing near-miss from Shego's sharp plasma reminded her of that.
Ron looked towards Drakken's machine…. and burst out laughing.
"Seriously?" he called down towards the blue mad-scientist.
"What!?" Drakken called back defensively, hands on his hips. "Something funny, sidekick?"
"Just… you're still all flowery! You can't go back to being a bad guy when you look so sunny! It just doesn't…" He struggled for words, moving his hands in circles, "...fit your theme, you know?" He looked to Rufus for confirmation, and the little naked creature nodded his assent, chittering in what sounded like an affirmation.
"He's got a point, you know," Shego yelled over the sound of the girl's blow-trading.
"You mean I should go with a floral theme?" Dr. Drakken answered, looking perplexed. He put a hand to his jaw, thinking. "Like a very evil…. Flower… King…"
"No! Definitely not what I meant!" Shego shouted, sounding a little panicked. Kim tried not to roll her eyes. Her arches really had issues. They all had issues, but Dr. Drakken in particular…
Ron had used Drakken's momentary confusion to get closer, running along the second floor landing and jumping down from the railing near the shiny chrome laser-like machine.
"So, what does this thing do, anyways?" Ron asked, now only a couple paces behind Drakken. The villain started, swirling around quickly and letting out a very unimpressive squeak. Ron had certainly gotten better at the sneakiness lately, too, though essentially he still held onto his Ron-ness. Kim hoped the Ron factor would hold out on this trip, since she was much too busy dodging henchmen and trying to land a solid hit on Shego to bother with Drakken's "Master Plan."
"It… It's the "Static Imbiber 4000!" Dr. Drakken suddenly declared, seemingly shaking off his surprise at Ron's sudden appearance to divulge into explaining his evil plan. "With one hit of this powerful beam, my victim becomes completely full of powerful static electricity! One touch with a good conductor, and the target get a rather nasty shock! Bwahahaha!"
Shego sighed loudly, holding a hand over her forehead in exasperation. Kim raised an eyebrow, still facing her adversary with fists raised. "A… static shock machine. That's all!?"
"Don't ask!" Shego yelled, but it was obviously too late.
"I'm glad you asked, Kim Possible! You see, using the Static Imbiber 4000 on the relatively dry climate of Greenland was only Phase One of my Master Plan!"
"Ugh. You had to press the issue," Shego huffed, shaking her head at Kim.
There was a rather large henchmen making his way up behind Ron, but Kim didn't have time to call out before Shego lunged once again, capitalizing on the momentary distraction.
"...Phase Two," Drakken continued, "...will be quite- shocking- I can assure you! It may spark your interest to know-"
"-see," Ron interrupted, cocking his head to the side and leaning lightly with one arm on the machine, "that's the problem, right there. I'm just not… buying the electricity puns. It doesn't match the big…" he gestured around his head, clearly indicating the giant flower surrounding Drakken's.
"Hmm…" Drakken looked like he was thinking hard, though his eyes darted behind Ron towards the henchman making his way silently forward. "So you're saying I should make the most of my own newfound abilities rather than focusing on the "mad-scientist" aspect?"
"Exactly!" Ron said, casually jumping up in the air and landing a flying back-kick directly into the square-jawed face of the goon behind him. The big man in the red jumpsuit fell back, KO-ed instantly. Ron didn't even let it pause his conversation, continuing with his thought. "You could make, like, a pollen cannon that puts people to sleep, or a man-eating venus flytrap of doom, or-"
"Ron!" Kim shouted from across the room. "What did we say about giving the baddies ideas!?"
"Oh, right," Ron muttered sheepishly, rubbing at the back of his head. "My bad Kim!"
"That's right, "your bad,"" Drakken commented darkly, grinning with confidence. "I think I'll take you up on your advice… right now!"
Suddenly, the vines hidden beneath Drakken's navy lab coat sprung forward, catching Ron off-guard and wrapping around him. His arms were firmly trapped at his sides faster than he could react, and Drakken immediately took action, lifting Ron off the ground to dangle upside down in the air above the "Static Imbiber 4000."
"Ahhhh! Kim!" Ron shouted, but Kim had already been monitoring the situation. She cursed silently, knowing she had to somehow finish this fight with Shego quickly, fight through the half a dozen remaining henchmen, and rescue her boyfriend before Drakken… "static-ed" him.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Rufus fall from where he had hidden in Ron's pocket… right on top of the huge machine.
Shego had somehow flipped and landed behind Kim, landing a rather painfully impressive kick right at the base of her spine. The cheerleader groaned, her knees buckling and hitting the ground as a burning pain shot through her back. Damn. She really needed to stop getting distracted. Maybe she needed to focus more on the world-saving, and drop some of her many extracurriculars at school? Or maybe it was the 18 credits that were kicking her butt? Either way, Kim Possible was way too exhausted to let herself slip up even once in a fight against Shego.
"What's the matter Kimmie? Getting old?" Shego taunted, obviously noting that Kim was not in top form.
"You should really re-think your taunts, Shego. Since, you know, if either of us are "getting old," it'd be-"
Shego growled, pounding a fist down at Kim's fallen form and connecting with the floor as Kim rolled away.
"Honestly, do I spy some crows feet, Shego? Just how much older than me are you?"
Enraging Shego was usually not the best way to go, but Kim was desperate to put the girl off her game as soon as possible. She had to win this fight and rescue her guy ASAP! As expected, Shego's attacks intensified, and as Kim struggled to her feet she had to block blow after blow, backing herself into a rather tight corner of the lair.
Her plan, it seemed, was starting to work. Shego was growing slower, more tired. Soon she would mess up and Kim would take her shot.
All of a sudden, the Static Imbiber 4000 began to make whirring noises again. Only this time, it was accompanied by a strange, sucking whirlwind that tugged at the girls' hair and drew everyone's attention back to Ron and Drakken.
Rufus was hanging from a small lever, which had been pulled downward by the naked mole rat. Apparently, this was not ideal for the health of the machine. Sparks were flying, wind was whirling, and the sounds produced by the machine were beginning to sound harsh and grinding.
"Of course," Shego muttered before abandoning the fight and running toward Drakken. "I told you this would happen, Dr. D! Why would you put a level on the machine that could destroy it, anyways!?" She grabbed the man by the shoulder of his lab coat roughly, pulling him along and causing him to drop Ron from the evil clutches of his plant-vines.
Ron somehow managed to swivel in mid-air and land on his feet, and despite the fact that he was also screaming at the time it looked almost… graceful. Not a word Kim ever thought she would use to describe her best friend and boyfriend, but it definitely fit his new abilities.
Kim was once against struck with admiration for how much Ron had grown since they had first started saving the world together. But if there was one thing she loved about him the most it was his capacity for growth without losing who he really was.
"Kim, do you think Drakken has insurance?"
Kim had finally reached Ron, and the two immediately began fleeing out the front passageway. This was not the first conversation she expected the two of them would have after two weeks apart.
"Insurance- you know, for all the lairs that get blown up. Is there an evil insurance company or something?"
"I… I wouldn't rule it out, I guess." But it was definitely weird to think about.
They made it out the front doors. The lair was in a mostly uninhabited area of Greenland (which described most of the large country), and though it had been cold when she arrived it hadn't been snowing as hard as it was now.
"Great," she muttered. She had not thought to bring the right equipment for this weather. As the two continued to cover as much ground as possible, she pulled out her Kimmunicator.
"Wade?" she tried, "ETA on our ride out of here?"
"Uh, Kim…" Ron said, just before a loud explosion sounded off behind them, the lair completely crumbling under the impact of the overloaded Static Imbiber 4000. Maybe it hadn't been as sturdy as it had appeared.
"Wade?" Kim tried again. Her screen was black. She shook the device experimentally, holding it up to her ear. Not even the slightest electrical buzz. It was definitely broken.
"Kim?" Ron tried again.
Kim sighed, pocketing her device. She would just have to wait until Wade decided to send her ride on his own.
"Um…?" Ron tried again, and this time Kim really focused on him.
His hair was standing straight up in the air, looking comically like a yellow puff ball. Rufus was already laughing uncontrollably, sticking halfway out of the pocket of Ron's cargo pants.
Then, it occurred to her that if Ron's hair was standing up, then…
"Oh, great. I look like a big red brillo pad, don't I?"
Rufus lost it, but Ron was dutifully trying hard not to laugh. The effect of his effort was a very twisted half-grin, an expression that was quickly putting Kim in a bad mood. "Great. So, I'm guessing the electrical output fried our electronics, too."
"Yeah, but we can just take my ride!" Ron answered, coming up close and plopping one big hand on top of Kim's head, attempting to smooth down her hair. It didn't work- at all- but Kim appreciated the gesture. She smiled up at him, her annoyance dissipating.
All of a sudden, she was hit with the overwhelming urge to hold him. She reached forward, closing the small gap between them and wrapping her arms around his waist. He smelled nice, despite the workout running to the mission had no doubt been. He smelled like home to her, which was very strange since she was the one who had stayed in Middleton.
Ron was the one who had left.
"Hey, Kim," Ron said, his teeth chattering more than a little. "I'm most definitely not trying to complain, here, but can we go somewhere less, er, freeze-your-face-off-cold?"
Ron, Kim noted, was dressed even less suitably than Kim for what was obviously becoming a rather large snowstorm. Maybe even a full-on blizzard. He was wearing his usual mission outfit- black sweatshirt and cargo pants. Kim had at least managed to grab a light jacket.
She nodded, and began to back up a little, but Ron caught her hand and kept her close. She smiled. Things were always so easy between them when they met, even when they lived half a world apart from each other for most of their time.
She followed her boyfriend through the snow towards a rocky outcrop that stood out even though visibility was quickly becoming an issue. It had been smart of him to park his "ride" in such a clearly-marked area, though maybe his logic had more to do with hiding the snowmobile from the lair's direct view. Either way, Kim was very glad to see it.
"You rode here on this?" she asked, clearly understanding why Ron had been so late.
"Yeah, no helicopters for rent during a storm- they said in Quaanaaq this blizzard was going to be a doozy."
So Ron had made himself more informed than she had. She would have to make sure to ask Wade about weather reports before going on missions in icy landscapes in the future.
Ron got on the snowmobile and Kim slid on behind him. His hair had started to flatten, so she could only hope the same was true of her own. As he started the vehicle, Kim put her arms around his waist, holding tight. She was feeling oddly exhausted- though she had noted as much during her fight with Shego. She hoped their ride wouldn't take all night. All she wanted was to get out of the cold and get some sleep.