Ranger turned his head, barely a fraction, but I could see him giving the guy across me a look, analysing every aspect of him, and then I saw the recognition on his face.
"Sergeant" I could hear the salute behind Ranger's voice.
"Corporal" the man replied back.
"Babe." Ranger directed his attention back towards me, his anger palpable as it came back with full force.
"What are you doing here? I know for a fact that you're not a sweets person."
"I came over to drop off the Turbo, your apartment was open, you didn't have your phone on you and its 5.30 in the morning." He replied back, now exasperated. I understood his panic considering my history.
"So how did you find me?" I asked with narrowed eyes.
He looked a bit guilty for a moment as his eyes flickered to my earrings. Oh wait. No he wouldn't do that. I could feel my blood pressure rise as I thought about what he'd done. On a level I wasn't even angry, I just felt betrayed. He didn't trust me.
Mrs. Baker came out of the kitchen with three boxes of Boston crèmes and gave one to the man across me and two to me. I shook my head and stomped out the Bakery without giving Ranger a single glance.
I ran all the way back to my apartment and made it just in time. I was feeling really dizzy and my blood pressure levels had been fluctuating. I lay on my bed and closed my eyes breathing in and out for a few minutes to get everything under control.
Suddenly I felt as though the universe had finally opened up and was letting me have a look at myself. The reality of myself. I haven't really given Ranger a reason to be able to trust me with my own safety. A child can break into my apartment. I have no training, no skills, no nothing. I can't even feed myself without burning the house down. I keep saying that I am independent, but I rely on everyone else for pretty much everything. I need to grow up.
"Babe." I think he's saying sorry.
"Can you train me? Like real training, with all the waking up early, eating rabbit food and wanting to kill you for putting me through it, but being grateful at the same time kind of training."
"What's going on in that head of yours?" he asked me gently as he pulled me into his lap.
"I just feel really stupid. I expect you to trust me with my safety, and let me have my independence, but I've never given you a reason to trust me. I'm just a bumbling idiot."
"Are you sure? There's no going back once you start." His eyes were blazing as he looked into mine, searching, beseeching into my being.
"Yes."
"Pack your bags. I'll pick you up in two hours. Only pack essentials." With that he walked out of my apartment, leaving me open mouthed. What. Have. I. Done.