411XXXVIII.
There was a brief period of relief after all the exams had passed. No one knew of the results yet but the immediate period after the exams felt so freeing since there was no more sitting down and having to vomit out everything we knew.
In a show of comradery our class went ahead and had somewhat of a picnic/post-op meeting after the exam. Being quite considerate of our exhausted selves, the teachers had prepared Onigiri and some cold tea for everyone to share.
It felt right to be meeting everyone after this whole ordeal. I had told everyone roughly about the dealings with Asano I had done after the representatives meeting, but finer details had been left out for my own benefit. I didn't really feel like everyone discussing what I was planning with Asano's favor.
"I think, I'd like to keep meeting the class like this, even after we graduate and become adults along the way," I said out loud thoughtlessly, my train of consciousness running on and on with a pleasant kind of numbness spreading through me.
Karma and I were pretty much lying on top of each other on the grass, but I really couldn't bring myself to care when the late afternoon weather has decided to be pleasantly cool, and the sun was gently shining on the meadow.
"That would be nice, wouldn't it?" Nagisa answered me, Sugino, Kanzaki and Kayano sitting near us, while Okano was discussing some of her results with Kataoka. There were some who had decided to talk about the exams while others just kept quiet and enjoyed the food.
I hummed. There was really a certain kind of peace right now. A bit like the quiet before the storm, but that didn't deter any of us from relaxing.
This kind of tranquility was what were supposed to be experiencing, not the fear of death and being shunned from our peers.
I felt like this was the thing worth fighting for.
I gave myself an afternoon of reprieve for some alone time, some time with Karma and also talking a little bit more nonsense to my parents.
The day after was time to talk to Karasuma-sensei to update him on Asano's suspicions, the deal of giving the school president more information and also updates regarding the amendments of our contract.
I had informed him the previous day that I would like to talk, but I hadn't been able to gauge his mood in any way, the stonewall that our P.E. teacher was.
Somehow, I thought, that the feeling, that these one-on-one meetings were distasteful, was probably mutual. They were absolutely necessary, but each time I had to talk to Karasuma-sensei in this capacity, I felt something unpleasant churning inside me.
"Kitani, come in."
"Good afternoon, Karasuma-sensei. Thank you for meeting me." I bowed lightly towards my teacher, who gestured me to take a seat opposite of him.
"Alright, let's get straight to the point why you want to talk to me, Kitani. Is it because of the contract amendments? I am afraid there's nothing I can do regarding that," the teacher went directly for the kill, unfortunately missing what I was actually here for.
"A little, sensei, but I'm not entirely here for that. Though I hope it will be through by then," I admitted. "But what I am actually here for is a request and warning. Asano Gakushuu is very suspicious of our class right now and has even approached me directly, asking for information."
As a tactical move, I didn't tell the man yet about the request or the bet, but Karasuma-sensei most likely had an idea.
"… I see, thank you for telling me this." His eyes took on a calculating glint. "I suppose you have an idea how to deal with this problem or else you wouldn't have requested for such a formal meeting."
I raised my hands in defense, caught.
"Yes, I think it's better to let him know about our class's mission to a certain extent, since I can't imagine him sitting still if there was a gag order imposed on him. He's crafty enough to skirt the fine line of such a contract and could potentially go gather information from his father. It's certainly better to control what he finds out instead of letting him loose like a wild bomb."
"I don't think that this reasoning will go well with my superiors like this," Karasuma-sensei said drily, no love lost between him and the politicians discussing our every move. "I see your point, but there is the danger of a worldwide mass panic if any details are spread."
"I know but that's why I went to you and not your superiors, sensei," I replied confidently, despite feeling a bit sorry for causing him another headache. "I also promised him, that I would ask you. I mean, he figured out enough that something was going on to trick me into talking to him about it. I doubt that next time he will be this direct. Someone in our class is going to slip up especially with someone like Asano doing the digging."
"So you suggest we tell him about your mission, but then what? He will have to sign an NDA for us being able to tell him anything. Do you think he will stop then?" Karasuma-sensei questioned, his doubts reasonable.
"I think Asano is someone who knows when to stop. He's a power hungry individual but some of that is probably his father's influence. It irks him, that he doesn't know what caused the power shift with 3E and I believe he will stop, once he knows that it was something that was outside of his sphere of influence. He won't risk the world for his ego," I said, convinced that it would be possible to reason with him. Despite not being Asano's friend I was certain that I could say that much about his character.
Silence reigned in the room after my explanation. I allowed myself to fidget, a sign of my emotional turmoil with this situation.
"…I am allowed to bend the rules for this a little bit, since this can endanger your mission and risk a world-wide panic. I will report to the government that an individual found out something about your mission and we clarified everything with them and signed the NDA. That way, I won't have to ask for permission and it won't take any time to get approval."
I perked up at his words.
"Would you really…?"
"I regret that the amendments to the contract which is about your basic safety as human beings take so much time to get approved. This is something that I can take on, Kitani, don't worry. I'm glad that you asked me and didn't go ahead to do anything on your own." Ah, this was how it felt to have someone reliable to have as a person of authority. I found, that I liked this feeling.
"Thank you, sensei."
We spent more time talking about the fine details than expected. By the time the talk was done, it was well into the evening that I had to hurry to get down to the train station.
Unexpectedly, Karasuma-sensei's colleagues offered me a ride. Not taking a second look at such a nice offer, I accepted easily, entering the vehicle headed towards my own home. There was a certain kind of luxury behind it to not have to take public transportation to my home even though the infrastructure was fairly well developed as an outer district of Tokyo.
"Thank you very much for giving me a ride," I told them once everyone had settled inside the car.
"Not a problem," Sonokawa said, the female negotiation officer said, sitting at the steering wheel. "Tsuruta-san, Ukai-san and I normally get off during this time of the day. It's no trouble to take you with us when your house is on the way."
"It's still very nice of you," I insisted. "But does Karasuma-sensei not get of work at the same time as you do, Sonokawa-san? He was still working on something when we walked down."
"It isn't strange for him to be working overtime during the week. He usually does stop working at the same time that we do, but we take separate cars. Karasuma-san got a call just now, that required him to stay," Tsuruta, who turned around from the passenger to talk to me. I reflexively adjusted my glasses on my nose bridge when he did the same.
"Do you know what it was about, Tsuruta-san?" It was a rather easy deduction that the call was about our class. Karasuma-sensei job was everything that concerned our class in regards towards Koro-sensei. While his workaholic tendencies weren't a secret if someone called him at this late hour it had to be of some importance. Whatever the collective world governments were planning I wanted to know.
"Something about the bounty money was mentioned. I-"
"Tsuruta-san, I don't think you should talk about it. It could be nothing," Sonokawa interrupted him. Beside me, Ukai was watching the conversation with a contemplative expression on his face.
"Sorry, we don't want to cause any unnecessary panic among you students and some of the details why the government is contacting Karasuma is often due to status updates and administrative work. It is most likely nothing too urgent," Sonokawa tried to explain to me, but her excuses weren't enough to convince me that nothing was going on. It was undoubtedly linked to the fact we possibly could be going to the island resort for the next big assassination attempt.
"You do know that sounds even more suspicious?" I asked drily, on the risk of being rude towards them. It was more beneficial for me to double down on this and get a little more information than none. Even if this life was my normal life, it was part of a shounen manga plotline. Something would happen I wanted to find out. "Did our possible plans for the summer break leak? Did someone mess with the bounty?"
"We don't want to cause any rumors or unrest among you, Kitani-san. We don't know for sure."
"But isn't it our right to know about the details? We are laying our life on the line. Last time with Shiro was so dangerous for all of us." I sometimes loved being a teenager again. Being bratty and very forward could be excused due to youth and puberty. Clumsy guilt-tripping like this was most effective at this age in my opinion.
"The money was stolen." Heads whipped around at the sudden honest answer.
"Ukai-san?" Tsuruta turned around, surprised by his subordinates' straight forwardness. I felt a brief moment of guilt thinking that Ukai could be in trouble because he just decided on his own to tell me the truth.
"I just thought that Kitani-san wouldn't let up until we answered her question." What an accurate description of what I had been about to do. Kudos to Ukai.
"Do you know who stole it? Was it an internal problem or an outsider?" Though I had very little hope that they knew anything about it. Given, that I knew about the robbery now, I could be sure that outsiders were able to infiltrate the government even with their securities measures. Or there were traitors inside the organization. Factors to consider when big plans were being made.
"We don't know, but you shouldn't worry about not getting your reward. The world governments don't want the world to be destroyed, so there's no need to think that you won't be paid," Sonokawa answered in a tired voice, clearly not happy about her coworker's choice to tell me.
"Thank you very much for answering my questions. I won't go ahead and tell my classmates about it if it isn't necessary. As you said, there's no need to panic needlessly."
"Thank you, Kitani-san." When the car halted in front of a familiar building, another familiar figure was walking down the sidewalk towards the entrance. I smiled. How timely. "We're here."
"Thank you very much for driving me home, Sonokawa-san. And thank you as well, Tsuruta-san, Ukai-san. Have a nice evening. Goodbye."
"You, too and it was nothing." After exchanging more goodbyes, they drove off.
"You're really silly, you know that, Karma?"
"How am I silly for coming to greet you when you come home?" His head was placed on my shoulders while his arms circled my waist from behind. I laughed at him.
"It isn't even your house."
"Doesn't matter, I certainly don't want to spend time alone in my house when I had such a hard time with the exams the last days." I turned around, forcing him to release me only to hug him again in greeting.
"Liar, you definitely will land in the top 10 like you always do," my voice muffled from speaking towards his shoulder.
"Well, I had an incentive to do well this time. I don't want your attention being taken all by Asano only. How did your talk about him go?"
"How come we're talking about him again," I giggled at the subject, feeling relaxed now that I was home. "It went fine. Karasuma-sensei will most likely tell Asano at some point about Koro-sensei, so he will stop snooping. I actually don't know how the exams will turn out, but a tie would be the best outcome, I think. Oh, and we should be a lot more paranoid when we do big plans for Koro-sensei now."
"What do you mean?" Karma stepped back to look at me a little despairingly. Yeah, he was feeling the exact same way I felt when my brain started thinking about contingency plans concerning our life right now. I pulled him towards the door.
"Well, let's go inside, I have a lot to tell you."
"WE WON!" The class broke out in cheers. Since Asano and I didn't count in the overall competition between 3A and 3E, our class had won in a 5:0 all-out victory against 3A. Koro-sensei had read out loud all the results excluding Asano and me first, since the terms of the bet had changed after the school representative, and I had made a deal. The top scores overall hadn't been announced by our teacher yet.
Seeing their exhilaration at the results, I felt so proud of them for putting in the effort and time to perform to their absolute best in the exams. Funnily enough almost everyone except for Nagisa and Kayano had beat the "Virtuosos", as they were called, whom they had met in the library the week before. Only Karma and Takabayashi had been the one to get the better grade outside of the library group in Math though Asano and I had both gotten full points in that subject.
"Sayori! Did you win?" Talking about Asano's and my grades, my classmates pounced on me after their excitement for their victory subsided. From the corner of my eye, I could see Karma staring at his exam sheet, an unreadable expression on his face. He hadn't gotten the top score in any subject in our class. Takebayashi had gotten the top spot in Math instead of Karma.
"I don't know, yet," I answered, taking out my phone to text Asano my results. "I got full points in English and Math, but not in the other subjects. It's 491 Points in sum. I don't know if that's enough because these exams were really tough. But at least I'm not forced to study anymore. "
"Did you guys bet on the full score or who would be better in each subject?" Nagisa asked once he heard my answer.
"Full points. We settled on the normal terms, and it's become the norm for us to just look at the overall score." I looked down at the chat to see bubbles, indicating that he was writing. A little amount of nervousness was settling in my stomach. His support in just one single thing in the future could be rather important.
"…" I looked a bit speechlessly at Asano's text, adjusting my glasses to see if I was seeing right.
"…We tied."
"Oh, what does that mean for you now?" Nakamura glanced over my shoulder to look at Asano's individual scores. "Oh, we even won against Asano as a class. He only beat us in 2 out of 5 subjects overall if we exclude Sayori and if we don't, he only won Japanese and tied in Math."
"I'll talk with him about it I think," I answered nonchalantly and typed in a response to discuss what to do regarding our bet. Afterwards I stood up to walk towards Karma, who was still staring at his scores.
"Talk to me, Karma, what's up? Why are you looking at your scores as if it could give you all the answers to life?" The redhead was turning his head towards me, still in a daze. I could recognize vague signs of disappointment and upset in his expression.
"I-," Karma started and was interrupted by Koro-sensei.
"Everyone, settle down, we can now talk about the top scores overall in your year to decide who gets to kill a tentacle," he announced.
"No, why do we not get to take 5 tentacles? We won against 3A in all subjects! " Protests were raised against our teacher's condition. "You are being such a cheapskate!"
We could see our teacher sweating at hour words and protests, trying to enforce his condition. It felt petty towards our class that he wasn't acknowledging that they had won the bet against 3A. He was trying to save his own skin and some tentacles to increase his chances.
"No, no, no, everyone, you're excluding Sayori-kun as part of your class and Asano-kun as a part of 3A. That is unfair towards them!" he intervened. "And they are my tentacles, I can impose some restrictions."
"So petty," the whole class rumored.
"Anyway, I'll announce it now!"
"Wait a moment, you petty octopus! If you want to spin it like this, then we have something to say, too!" The most unexpected voice of all interrupted before our teacher could start. Terasaka was standing up and Hazama, Yoshida and Muramatsu right on his heel. "If you want to play like this you have to consider our grades too in our main subject!"
Terasaka slapped four exam sheets on the front desk, each of them sporting a proud "100" at the beginning of the sheet. He and his friend stood in front of Koro-sensei, arms crossed and ready for the confrontation.
"We all got 100 points for Home Economics! And no one ever said which main subjects would be included for your tentacles and we all got the top scores. So, you have to let us all take one of your tentacles," the burly teen argued in front of our teacher. The panic and disbelief on Koro-sensei's face was incredible.
"How can you say that Home Economics is a main subject? We're talking about the scores which are included in your overall ranking!"
"But you didn't even want to acknowledge our win against 3A, how can you even argue like this? Home Economics is super important!" Protests were flooding in, overwhelming our teacher in his ability to argue against the class's opinion. It was the typical reaction of teenagers hating what their teacher had said before. It was more or less his own fault for wanting to change the rules.
I was honestly not sure how he would go on about including me. I was part of this class, but I had practically excluded myself from the competition between 3A and 3E, making a personal bet with Asano. But the reward of being allowed to shoot a tentacle was independent of the whole class competition. By technicality, I should be included but personally it felt like cheating, seeing that I had actually done middle school once already. Not that Koro-sensei actually knew that exact detail even if he suspected something.
"How can you say that Home Economics are not important, sensei? It's the most essential thing to be able to live," Karma's voice interrupted my spinning thoughts. It threw me off a little that he was saying anything at all, when he hadn't seemed happy with his exam results. Though it could just be an avoidance tactic to stop confronting his disappointment.
"Well, sensei, either you acknowledge the hard effort that Terasaka and the others put into their exam preparation or you accept that we actually got all the top spots that we wanted and let us have five tentacles at least plus the ones that Sayori-san scored," Nakamura threw in mischievously, tying our teacher down with his own conditions. "Either way, you're going down. Don't go back on your word."
"Yes! Try to be a responsible adult at least once in your life and be a role model for your students." The increasing emotional pressure and waves of protest made our teacher sweat more than ever.
And finally-
"Fine! I concede!" He threw all of his available tentacles in the air. "You will get your extra tentacles, Terasaka-kun, Hazama-kun, Yoshida-kun and Matsumura-kun! Sayori-kun, we will talk separately later!"
The class paused in their happy celebrations.
"How come that Sayori doesn't get the same reward as us?"
"The condition for getting a tentacle was getting the top spot in any main subject because I wanted to motivate everyone in class to try their best. Sayori-kun excluded herself and Asano-kun in the competition with 3A by her own hand and has been repetitively among the two top scoring students in your school. She has made winning easier for the class since Asano-kun wasn't competing directly with you. That is why her reward for this should be considered carefully."
The lengthy explanation made many in the class pause, considering what our teacher had said about Asano.
That… hadn't been my angle, but the way Koro-sense phrased it was enough to justify a separate treatment. I thought about what could be a helpful reward. Another weakness didn't sound bad.
On the other hand, nervousness crept up my throat, thinking about the possibility that Koro-sense was going to investigate more about my background. His promise not to dig up anything related to my past from a few weeks ago resurfaced. Would he keep his word? But then again, there was nothing tangible for him to look for. The memories in my head didn't exist in this world.
"Meet me after class in the teacher's office, Sayori-kun."
"Alright, sensei."
"I'm a little stumped on how to reward you, Sayori-kun," our teacher easily admitted. We sat down on two desks in the front row, the rest of the class having left already. Karma had told me he would wait for me in a nearby café.
"You could just treat me like the others," I suggested, also knowing that the solution wasn't that easy. He had only 8 tentacles to give anyway.
… Or would his arms also count? It most likely wouldn't slow him down in terms of speed but he would have less mobility.
"I thought about that, too. But that doesn't feel right. Your class got me with the grades in Home Economics, so the tally is now 8 tentacles. Any other tentacle won't slow me down or give me more of a significant handy cap."
"Did you test that, sensei? Have you ever cut off all your tentacles below and then cut off more?" My voice sounded a little too clinical for my ears, while I was internally struggling to comprehend him cutting of his own limbs to test his limits. "… Did it hurt?"
"Ah, well…," he paused before answering. "You are really a lot more mature than your classmates, Sayori-kun. Everyone else hasn't really grasped what it means to kill me. But to answer your first question, I have done some tests."
"… How couldn't I, Koro-sensei?" I asked after a pause. My own mortality has been so apparent to me from the moment I woke up in this body. His life as well as the lives of all my classmates felt so tangible in my mind, flames waiting to be blown out. "I don't know what kind of person you are, sensei. You appear one day and tell us to kill you, while you continue to make everyone's life better. Do you feel guilt for placing that burden upon us? Are you just amused? Do you actually care what happens to us once we succeed? I don't want everyone to live with the guilt of having killed you."
I looked at his face, the caricature of his emotions.
"I am mostly here because I care about my friends. I don't need the money, nor do I need to stay in 3E. I'm just afraid of who will take the fall if we succeed."
"…" The silence between us was suffocating. The youthfulness that my classmates possessed couldn't act as a buffer between the two of us when they weren't in the room.
"… I am continuously surprised by you. You are wise beyond 15 years. I promised you, that I won't pry beyond anything you aren't willing to offer, but that doesn't mean that my curiosity isn't growing." His face was taking on several colors, betraying his varying emotions.
"I'll tell you my secrets if you tell me yours, sensei."
"Maybe one day, I will make that deal with you, Sayori-kun, but not today," he answered, and I was minimally disappointed despite not thinking that he would agree to my terms. The biggest part of me was relieved not having to reveal my reincarnation to him.
"You didn't really answer me if it hurts, sensei."
"I don't think that knowledge will help you in any way," he answered evasively, but in between the lines I could guess that it most likely did hurt him. How much was unclear.
I wasn't a saint. I ate meat because I liked the taste and I would kill for my own food if I had to. If I was to see it in the most utilitarian way I knew that killing our teacher would save many more lives. But that didn't change that our teacher was a sentient being, someone whom I suspected of having been human once judging from his carnal behavior and his innate empathy. I wasn't too arrogant to say that only human possessed rationality and intellect. Our teacher could be from entirely somewhere else, but his casualness interacting with people spoke of experience with people and even his nonchalant behavior towards Japanese culture made me surer of his identity. And I most likely wasn't the only one who suspected or even knew that.
It would haunt me if we ever succeeded killing him, even if I logically knew it was for the best. Everything our teacher did wasn't with the intention of killing us all in one big explosion. He was preparing every single one of us for a future where he wasn't there anymore to guide us, contrary to the fact he was going to destroy the world next year.
"I think, I would like to know one of your secrets as a reward, sensei. Maybe something that will help us kill you one day, if you feel like keeping it in the bounds of the rules you set for the reward," I asked quietly, aware of the somber mood that had set in. "You're a good teacher, sensei. I just don't know how we will live on once this school year has passed."
"… I wonder about that too."
We sat in a contemplative silence, both of us stewing in our own thoughts on what to do from now on. In this moment I didn't feel like the 15-year-old that I was always pretending to be. This was a moment where my mind was trying to see the world as the adult that I had once been.
A wave of disorientation hit me, once I had formulated that thought in my mind. Hadn't I already come to close with my former life? Why was I so unsettled at the thought? I wasn't 25 anymore nor had I developed beyond that age after living here as Sayori. Unrest settled inside my chest.
"Alright, I will tell you one of my major weaknesses 24 hours before your attempt at the resort. That's my reward for your efforts, Sayori-kun."
I nodded, a heavy weight in my throat making me unable to reply. This conversation was a little too much for me at my current mental state.
"If you feel like adding anything additionally that is connected to your education, you can ask me anytime. I would help you regardless of your exam results but I'll put in a little extra effort this time," he continued, probably somewhat aware of my mood but having the decency to carry on with the conversation.
"… Thank you, sensei," I answered, my voice sounding strangled to my ears. I tried to force myself back into the present situation but only succeeded partially. "Karma is waiting for me outside. Could you possibly tell him that I need a few minutes?"
"Take your time, Sayori-kun. I'll tell him to wait."
"Sayori-kun will be out in a bit, Karma-kun. She needs a little time to compose herself." Karma jumped at the sudden voice popping out from behind him and felt sour about the fact he was so distracted.
"Is she okay?" Despite his mixed feelings about his exam results, his concern for his girlfriend overshadowed any misgivings he had about the current situation.
"Yes, she seemed a but shaken after we talked, but I think she will be fine."
"Alright, thank you for telling me, sensei," he answered a bit sullenly, mood sinking a little bit more after hearing that Sayo wasn't well. He would bother her into a cuddle session at home to rest.
"You're welcome. But I would like to talk to you during the wait. I have noticed that you aren't particularly happy about your exam results. Care to share why?" Oh, how Karma loathed that Koro-sensei had noticed his emotional state. Objectively, the redhead knew that he hadn't been subtle about his feelings, Sayo had even questioned him right after the results were out, but this was his teacher. He wasn't particularly keen on discussing his feelings with that octopus.
"… I thought I would be better," Karma bit out angrily, coming short of a polite answer. The feelings of disappointment and anger at himself returned.
"You would have done better if you had focused on the exams from the start and not from the moment on it became something personal because Sayori-kun could have transferred classes," his teacher spoke out loud what he had been thinking about but didn't want to admit. "You will regret not doing things more than having done things in life, Karma-kun. Use your chance."
Had Karma been in a better head space he would have questioned his teacher about his advice. The way Koro-sensei talked sounded far more personal to the redhead than his normal advice.
Now though? Karma started to regret that he hadn't given his all even if it had been something mundane as his midterm grades. And at the same time it had been important to him.
"I don't know how this is different from the time in second year," Karma asked out loud. Half of it to himself, the other half to his teacher because he wanted another opinion. "There was nothing for me to do now and then."
"I think you know exactly why, Karma-kun," his teacher began, his voice gentle. The teenager flinched despite that. "If no one had managed to get into the top 10 then it would have felt like a loss no matter what the new terms of the bet stated."
"But I did get into the top 10! I even got into the top 5!" Karma didn't understand why he was still this frustrated. He had managed to go against what Asano had set out to do first with Sayo but it still wasn't enough for him. He still felt the knot inside his chest.
"But you didn't get a top score nor did you beat either Sayori-kun or Asano-kun. I think you are feeling inadequate because you don't think you are on the same level as then academically. I won't have to tell you that Sayori-kun is a strong and independent woman, who can take care of herself. We both know that. But talk to her about this. Asano-kun isn't a goal you have to surpass to keep your relationship, Karma-kun."
Karma stayed quiet. Was it really that what he was worried about? In the privacy of his mind, the redhead could admit that a lot of his emotional upheaval stemmed from feeling inadequate in comparison to Asano. But these exams made him feel that Sayo was so far away from him.
He knew that she had only agreed reluctantly to date him on his request. She had given him the chance and it felt great. At the same time he was aware that she wasn't infatuated with him. Not the same way he was feeling about her.
Sayo telling him about her memories of another life was something he felt privileged about. He felt special that she trusted him enough. Yet it influenced their relationship in a way that Karma felt keenly at times. Not only her character but her experience and the memories she retained.
Sayo was able to jump right to university to the point whew she had died in her former life. She could suddenly vanish from their school life. And these exams proved to him that he couldn't keep up with her. Even after actually studying for a while. He was aware that he hadn't been at his best but Sayo kept up with the current academic level and then some more a lot more easily compared to him. The most humiliating thing was probably that Asano was on a similar level to her. And he was the proof that someone could keep up even without memories of another life.
Karma felt shaken and afraid that his normal routine and life with his girlfriend could be shaken up so much by simple things like academics.
It was laughable that he was worrying about that when their class had this impossible mission to kill Koro-sensei. The situation with their teacher was abnormal and yet hadn't computed as 100% dangerous to Karma yet even though he knew that this was something to take serious.
Hilarious, he had jumped from a cliff in a show of foolishly bravery because he felt like proving their teacher wrong.
Karma felt like laughing and crying at the same time. What was wrong with him that he only thought about this now?
"Karma?" Her voice shook him out of his thoughts. He turned his head towards Sayo, who approached him with a worried expression, her complexion pale.
"Thank you for letting Karma know to wait, sensei. We will be going now." He bowed on command, yet his mind was miles away from the situation. Once Koro-sensei was far away from them, Karma turned to take Sayo in for a moment.
She didn't look any better than he felt, even after walking a little. His girlfriend also stopped to look at him, giving a weary expression and a quirk of her lips.
Carefully and as gently as he could Karma reached out for her to pull her into his embrace and she went along all to willingly.
It was a long time before they were ready to let go and go home.
Talking was better left for another time when they weren't feeling so fragile.
Someone tell me how to romance pls like what is romantic love even? Never crushed never felt like I was in love. Why is it so important haha?
A very loving thanks to my sister who tried to explain. I still never felt that way.
So mid term exam arc finally done, we are going to the island. I have so much planned but also that stuff was planned when I started this fic. I am still surprised that I am still writing.
TW: Mental health, medical problems
If you do not feel like you're in a good mental state of health, just skip this and please leave your thoughts on this chapter. Thanks for reading
SKIP HERE
Last year was shit for me and my family. My dad had 3 strokes, can't talk anymore, and is sitting in a wheelchair. As the oldest daughter I arranged so much last year even though I wasn't even in the same country at the beginning and when I was it was even more emotional and hardg. I didn't want to arrange a nursing home for my dad at 23 and have to finish my bachelor's at 24 in the same year. I cried. A lot.
And it's still going because everyone is/was planning for him to go home but it's just so difficult. I feel so stressed about that.
My mom relies on me because she can't speak our country's language well enough for the paperwork, my dad has to rely on me anyway, and my sister is unable to deal with this kind of stress because she is just too emotional and starts crying at even the smallest problems.
I hate it. My one friend who says he would support me is so emotionally insensitive that I started crying so much because of him.
I hate being the family head at this age. It feels like I am.
But I guess it was coming a long time. I have thought of such a long time about this kind of situation because my dad's fam has a history of this. Still not a fan.
This rant had been quite therapeutic, whueee. It's good to formulate my thoughts somewhere outside of my own head I guess. It's been a difficult time and taking care of myself and being nice to myself hasn't been the easiest. I'm right now on a trip through Northern Europe to get my mind of things a little and it's been helpful I think.
If you read through this whole rant, then thank you very much, I'm grateful that you read this story of mine and then this very long word vomit.
Please leave a review on your way out what you liked about this chapter.