Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or Ranma 1/2

BIG SHOUT OUT to my man Dragon king Azi Dahaka! You. Are. The. Man. Why? You brought that brilliant main character, Ikayoi, to my attention. That guy's badass, you can bet your ass I'll soon be writing a story with him as the main character, hell yeah. Thanks, dude. You're awesome.

Furious beeps of voluminous horns echoed out through the crowded highway, as Ranma tenaciously continued her pursuit of Ichigo, swerving her way through the still cars in a mazy fashion, paying no heed to the fact the angry drivers only demanded her and her alone to move out of the way as though the orange-headed young man was invisible.

After all, this wasn't the first time Ranma had the blame pinned on her. The girl had become so use to being the scapegoat of every little circumstance under the sun she had essentially become numbed to it by now.

"Quit running, will ya?" She hollered.

Ichigo glanced over his shoulder, his face marred with desperation, "Quit chasing me damn it!" He retorted, having never known anyone so persistent in his life. Even the sun called it a day, leaving the stage so the moon could partially light up the night sky, 'Note to self, never leave Karakura Town again!'

"Oh you would like that, wouldn't ya?" Ranma smirked with a knowing manner, "Well, tough luck, pal! I ain't gettin' off of your butt 'till I kick it to the sky!" She chortled, drawing a sigh from Ichigo.

"Do you always talk like that?" He dryly asked, hopping onto the railing of the motorway and soaring away. Surprisingly, the girl was still able to naturally trace his movements, the two high-flyers gliding over to a high skyscraper.

"What's that supposed ta mean huh?" Ranma asked defensively, following Ichigo from rooftop to rooftop as though they were mere skipping stones.

Ichigo twisted himself around, moving backward so the redhead could see his bored expression of dry disinterest, "Oh really?" Had her slangy speech mechanisms become so natural for her that she didn't even realize it anymore? "You really don't know?"

Ranma bristled, not liking being ridiculed, "Why you-?" She pushed forward, sending another bombardment of attacks at Ichigo, which he casually danced away from, the refreshing breeze fabricated from the girl's attacks hitting his sides.

"This song-and-dance again?" He deadpanned.

"Yes, this song-and-dance again! And I ain't gonna stop 'till I've creamed your butt!"

She did stop when the raspy, deep demonic voice of a distorted creature entered the vicinity. There were two interpretations for why such an occurrence played out to give Ichigo a break from the girl's tenacious pursuit, which were fate being kind on Ichigo or fate just screwing with Ranma.

Like it always did!

"GWOOSH!" It roared nonsensically, promptly causing Ranma to freeze with a start.

"What the-?" With a cringe, Ranma jerked her head over her shoulder, her light blue eyes widening at the sight of a broad-shouldered, robust coal-skinned creature with two bear-like ears situated on its head, growling at them in a stereotypical bogeyman pose, "What the heck is that thing!?" The most distinguishing feature she could ascertain of the silhouetted creature was its white-mask and two distinctive voids acting as its eyeballs.

Within them two yellow spherical orbs flashed as though they were its pupils.

"A hollow," Ichigo explained bluntly, combing his hand through his hair with a sigh of relief escaping his lips, 'Perfect timing.' Really, he was getting bored of being the mouse on the end of Ranma's cat chase. Who would've guessed?

"A hollow!?" Ranma said, even more confused, "The heck's that!?"

Unfortunately, the hollow wasn't the kind of stereotypical villain who had the strange common courtesy to just let the heroes chat and discuss strategies to defeat it and consequently lunged at them with speeds Ranma struggled to track, "Me so hungry!"

"What?!" Ranma sputtered, trying to ignore the warmth of her target's embrace as he parcelled her up in his arms.

"Look out!" Ichigo exclaimed, taking them off of the building roof, leaving the hollow to dent its surface as he fluttered them to the ground, "Goddamn hollow."

Quickly stepping out of Ichigo's radius, Ranma rubbed her arm, "S-So, how are we gonna beat that thing, pal?"

Ichigo glanced at the suddenly shy girl suspiciously avoiding his gaze in a quizzing fashion, 'Eh? What's her problem?' He didn't know, "Don't worry," Though what he did know was that he was going to ensure her safety, "I will protect you!"

Ranma glanced back at Ichigo with a start and a gasp. There was that darn warmth again. Just how the heck did he expel it anyway? And those eyes, those penetrating hazel orbs of interrogation he used to mentally coerce Kuno held such strong resolve they almost made her knees weak.

However, her own pride kept her from settlling as a damsel, even if she did admire his integrity, "Ha! Dream on, pal!" An violet upheaval of earth signalled the hollow's landing and Ranma swerved around elegantly to meet it head on with an aura of confidence.


"I don't need your protection!" She smirked, parking a hand on her hip, "What do ya take me for anyway, Princess Peach?"

"Ummm." Was that meant to be a question? Because he didn't know how to answer it. Dealing with a girl in a manner that wouldn't leave her feeling insulted was far too complex of a situation for the simple warrior to comprehend. If he couldn't handle a situation with his own power in a straight-forward fashion he was slumped.

Apparently, Ranma sensed Ichigo's hesitation because she demanded, "Don't you dare answer that!"

Well that was kind of contradictory.

"Me so hungry!" The hollow charged forward, reinstating Ranma's smirk.

"C'mon then buddy," With a quick beckoning of her two-fingers, she sped forward to meet him half-way, ignoring Ichigo's cry of "Wait damn it", "I've got yer can of whoop right here, all ready to be served. Hope you enjoy."

There was no miraculous Fairy Tale victory for Ranma that could force Ichigo to reevaluate his opinion of her strength. With a mere bitchslap, she was swatted away like a fly, her momentum carrying her into the side of a building where an ever-so intricate Ranma-shaped hole was now engraved.

"Darn it!" She had never felt anything so painful in her life. Even pig-boy's punches paled in comparison to this creature's. Her vision was blurry, but not blurry enough to masquerade the incoming creature's figure. Seeing it again after firsthand experiencing its strength caused a fear Ranma had never known to swell up inside of her, "Uh. What's say we call it a night… hehe." She tried to joke.

"I told you to wait!" If this was anime, her eyes would've bulged so far out of her head the redhead was sure they could've reached the other side of the street. This reality wasn't as trippy as anime, but her eyes were widened in shock at the unnatural materialization of Ichigo now before her pancaked form.

"What the-?" She gasped, 'How'd he get 'bee-four me so quickly?' If his speed wasn't enough to mesmerize her, his outrageous strength certainly was. With a simple swipe of his cleaver, his sword went through the hollow like a hot knife through butter, though instead of gushing blood like any normal eviscerated creature would've done, it dematerialized in a myriad of blue fireflies-like particles that vanished shortly afterward, "Wow. Talk about wacky, huh?"

Ichigo sighed, situating his cleaver on his back. Ranma diligently noted the bandages concealing his blade once again seemingly on their own accord, "Idiot," He said, though the lack of any actual malice or harshness caused Ranma to look down bashfully, "Didn't I tell ya to hold still?" He turned to her with concerned eyes of warmth.

Ranma gulped a lump down her throat, mustering up a grin. This alien concept of others, especially a guy, just being nice to her for the sake of it was completely foreign to her, "Yeah, well. Thought I could handle the thing myself," She said as Ichigo gently pried her from the wall, "I ain't the kinda guy who can sit idly by while others do the work for him, y'know?" She dusted herself off.

"I understand that," Ichigo assured, cocking his head to the side to rub the side of his neck in an awkward manner at the girl's usage of the male pronoun, "But attacking an unknown enemy's just dumb."

"I see your point," Heaving a sigh, a confident smile curved across her lips, "But don't worry, next time I'll knock a hollow-thing's block off for sure," She held her thumb up, swiping it across the tip of her nose, "I never lose twice."

"Ah-uh," Ichigo sarcastically donned, feigning bored interest, "Well that's all well and good, but if you ain't got a Zanpakuto you won't able to dice-up a hollow."

"Zanpakuto?" Ranma blinked.

Ichigo half-turned, jerking his thumb over his back to the tip of his Zanpakuto, "This thing. This is a Zanpakuto used to purify hollows."

"I see," Ranma said, wrapping an arm around her sides to rest her free elbow upon her arm, cupping her chin, "But is there any other way to cream a hollow?"

"You could be Chad."

"As in…"

"Be strong as all hell."

"Got ya," Ranma confirmed with a lopsided grin on her lips, "'N Chad would be the Big-guy with ya before, right?"

"Yeah that's him," Ichigo clarified with insouciance. Chad could handle himself.

"How'd he get a name like 'Chad' anyway? Guy looks Mexican."

"He is, but everyone around here calls him Chad, and I call him Chado."



Even the chill of the night was audible.

"Good question," Translation: He had no clue himself, "Any other questions?"

"Just one," Ranma grinned innocently at Ichigo's look of annoyance. She couldn't quite put her finger on it but there was just something about pestering him that just felt so amusing, "By 'purifying a hollow,' what do ya mean exactly?"

"Exactly as it's implied," Ichigo sighed, wondering where Rukia was at a time when she was needed most. He would do his best to summarize the details as briefly as he could, "Shinigamis cleanse hollows of their sins and send 'em on to heavens." Near enough. Sheesh. This explaining stuff was hard. As much as it pained him to admit, he had a better appreciation for the midget's crappy drawings.

"Oh!" Her mouth opened up, only to snap shut again, "Wait. What?"

"Shinigami," Ichigo jerked a thumb at his head, "Me."

"Wait. Hold up," Slowly, she pointed at Ichigo, "If you're a Shinigami, then what are ya doing here? Shouldn't ya be in like, heaven or sumthin?"

"Well, I'm not really a full Shinigami," He shook his head at Ranma's inquisitive expression, "It's a long story, and I really haven't got the patience to go into all the details. Just know I got my powers under extenuating circumstances."

Ranma held back a snicker, "It's cool," She folded her arms behind her head, "I ain't got any patience either, pal."

"Thanks for being so understanding," He replied unthankfully.

"You're welcome," Ranma returned, letting her arms droop to her sides, "Still, if ya got your grim reaper powers under unique conditions, does that mean any ol' human could become a kickass death god?"

"Uh," He could see the hope gleaming within her sparking azure-hued eyes, and didn't have the stone-cold heart to straight-up tell her there was a seventy percent chance she could die by attempting to acquire Shinigami powers, "Probably." Besides, theoretically, if he could successfully assimilate Rukia's power without dying in the process then why couldn't she? She was as much as a main character as he was, after all.

Main character protection rights and all that jazz.

…He just wished he hadn't fed her hope though.

One second her legs left the ground, and the next they were conjoined firmly behind Ichigo's back just above his rear in a cross, her arms wrapped around his torso.

"W-What a-are ya doing?!" Ichigo stuttered, unintentionally giving the flirtatious girl more incentive to press on her seduction of him with his blushing face.

"You said probably, didn't ya?" She smugly asked, eyeing her prey with mischief glinting within her eyes. Ichigo stiffly nodded, his throat feeling inexplicably dry, "So then, teach me!" She bridged the gap between their faces, setting her nose against Ichigo's as his breathing deepened, "I'm sure we can work out my payment. Don't you?"

"I," Ichigo's mouth flopped like a fish.

"How cute!~" Ranma teased, "Put a sword in your hand and you're a he-man. Put a girl in front of you and you're the model dork!~" She chortled.

"Hey, damn it!" He complained, squirming to get her off, but not squirming enough, "You said… y-you were a guy anyway."

"Well, that's true," Ranma admitted, not bothering to dodge the bullet, "But I'm a girl right now, ain't I?" She grinned anew.

"I-I guess," Ichigo murmured.

"Would ya say I'm a pretty girl?" Ichigo's blush brightened, evoking hearty laughter from Ranma, "You're too easy!" She flipped away from Ichigo, skilfully landing on the ground with her hands on her hips, watching him wheeze bent over at the waist, "You okay there buddy? You're almost as lousy as pig-boy is at coping with a girl coming onto ya."

Ichigo mustered up a glare Ranma's way, getting a look of faux-innocence from her in return, "Oh screw you!" He said, "How'd ya even end up as a freaky half boy, half girl anyway?"

"It's a long story," Ranma smirked at using Ichigo's words against him, causing him to scowl, "If ya got time maybe I'll tell ya."

"Fine," He groused, pivoting on his heels, "My little sister's probably made supper by now. Come. You can spill the beans there down at my place."

Ranma's eyes gleamed with opportunity, "Oh, you're inviting me to dinner at your folks' place already, eh?" Ichigo flinched, knowing he walked right into that one, "You don't beat around the bush around, eh?" She asked satirically, "You must really wanna put a ring on my finger."

"That's not what I meant!"

Ranma laughed blithely, "I know, I know. It's just fun screwing with ya," She sauntered past the scowling Ichigo, looking over her shoulder with a saucy smirk etched on her face, "Though I bet cha would like to 'screw' me wouldn't ya stud?"

"Urge to kill…" He looked constipated, "Raising!"

"Gee. Are ya taking a crap or trying to go Super Saiyan?" She taunted before a look of realization flashed across her face, "Oh yeah! I almost forgot."

The tension in Ichigo vaporized, leaving him looking bored, "Like what?" He all but demanded, expecting the girl just to sexually needle him again. That was why he was completely thrown off by the actual question she asked that had nothing to do with whether or not he found her attractive.

"What's your name fella?"

He collapsed to the ground with his legs sticking up.

"Is it sumthin I said?"

"Fuck me."

In hindsight, it probably wasn't such a good idea to utter such an insinuation, even sarcastically, to a vixen just looking for chances to needle him.

"Sure thing, but after dinner. Might as well get a head start on obtaining a mastery of patience."

...As Ichigo found out the hard way.

"Damn it!


City of Insanity




The Wonders of Trolling

(Crazy Town – With Chad)

The first thing Chad wanted to do when he declared his desire to leave Nerima was just that; leave. And he was going to leave too, until one of the resident crazies immediately started tailing him. That was problematic for many reasons, the main one being if he led one to Karakura Town her presence could evoke a chain-reaction that could potentially infect Karakura with Nerima's insanity.

Chad didn't doubt that possibility for a minute.

The instance the first two showed up, others just randomly started popping up until a full-blown wacky extravaganza was transpiring before him and his best friend, Ichigo.

No siree.

Chad didn't know whether it was Akane, Ranma or even both that were the initiator or initiators of the screwy occurrence, he just knew even one resident from this town in Karakura was one too many for anyone's sanity.

He sincerely hoped Ichigo was able to shake his own pursuer, because he was struggling to convince his own to terminate their unnatural alliance.

Contrary to Ichigo, Chad had patience in abundance, but even his nigh unbreakable patience was beginning to wear thin as he led his follower on a pointless meander around Nerima.

Nightfall had already come for Pete's sakes.

"Where you going?" Shampoo asked impatiently.


"Shampoo want to reunite with her airen!" She stated, crossing her arms, "He chase your friend, so if she sticks close to you, you lead her straight to him." That was a pretty clever tactic all things considered.

Chad didn't think anyone here could comprehend the "complexity" of strategy, but even still there was one flaw in her logic Chad couldn't help but point out, "I'm not heading to Ichigo."

"Eh?" Shampoo blinked.

"It's late," Chad mumbled with a shrug, "I'm going home. Ichigo should be at his now, I assume."

"You can't!" Shampoo denied vehemently, "Quiet Gorilla-boy has to go to friend so Shampoo can get her airen!"

Gorilla-boy? That was a new one. It was almost enough to make Chad crack a smirk. Almost. Chad didn't smirk and rarely, if ever, smiled, "If I don't?"

"Then Shampoo make you!"

Chad's eyebrows lifted up into his hair, "You can?"

Shampoo nodded vigorously, "Yes! She amazon warrior!"

That was interesting fact to learn. From what from Chad gathered on amazon warriors in school, the Amazonians were an all-exclusive female-only tribe with females as almost as huge and muscular as himself. Typically, they were usually found in South America, but that didn't mean other countrywomen couldn't form a tribe of Amazonians.

"You can't," Chad said bluntly, effortlessly tanking the blow of Shampoo's punch that impacted into his steel of a chest, "See?"

Shampoo bit back a wince as she nursed her hurt hand. An 'ouchy' would've been vastly appropriate to utter if she was actually as dumb as her lack of the Japanese language implied. She was a member of the renowned Amazonians, thus she would not disgrace her tribe by showing pain in such a pitiful fashion.

"What you made of?!" Shampoo demanded.


"Really?" Made sense to her. She felt like she was hitting plutonium by striking his chest.

A bead of sweat ran down Chad's cheek, "Uh. That was a joke." At least it was his attempt of his joke, poor as it was admittedly. His facial features remained as unmoving as it was when they first started their pointless hike to nowhere in particular, giving Shampoo the impression he was dead serious.

"You no very good at that," Shampoo bluntly told him.

"Hm," Chad hummed just before his natural stoic-disposition was broke by the girl materializing a spear from thin air, 'Where was she hiding that?'

"Shampoo beat Indestructible-boy with this?" She smirked, ready to lunge at Chad, and she would've too if not for the halting palm he shot out, "What now? What you want?"

"Just a minute," He requested and Shampoo curiously traced his casual saunter over to a lamppost minding its own business. As easily as pulling a wooden sign stomped into the ground, Chad plucked the ludicrously tall pole out of the ground, flexing it around like a sword for emphasis, "Ready?" He hoped his sarcasm was conveyed through his monotone.

Shampoo gaped, her spear falling limply out of her fingers and clattering noisily to the hard ground. Her tenacity could only convince her to push forward so much, but against such a titan who could rip lampposts from the ground like toothpicks even that couldn't delude her into believing she could win.

"Okay!" She chirped.

"Eh?" Chad almost blinked.

"Shampoo submit to Indestructible-boy's superiority!"

She admitted that quick.

It almost seemed anticlimactic, but Chad wasn't complaining.

He was a pacifist after all.

Jamming the lamppost back in place a small tremor occurred, filling Shampoo's eyes with lustful admiration at Chad's strength.

"Now?" He wondered whilst Shampoo sauntered over to him with a happy smile on her face, arms tucked behind her back in an act of surrender.

"Shampoo want hug," She stated, earning herself an quizzed look of confusion from Chad, "It honorary sign of respect between warriors."

"Okay," He agreed as Shampoo's eyes gleamed deviously.

Leaping up, the Amazonian tied her legs around Chad's torso, cutting out all dramatic suspense and diving down to capture his lips against her own, moaning into his mouth as Chad's eyes, normally veiled away by his hair, shot into view with shock. To think his first kiss would be under these circumstances, and to this crazy girl? Unreal.

Breaking the kiss, Shampoo smirked at Chad's passively gaping expression, "You and Shampoo now engaged."

Wait. What? Engaged? He hadn't even graduated high school let alone went through collage.

"Uhh. What?"

Shampoo giggled, sliding down Chad's muscular torso to land on her feet. He just ignored the tingles her gentle touch gave him, "It honorary for a defeated Amazonian to give Kiss of Engagement to her victorious male opponent."

Oh. That was why she seemed so blissfully determined to tie the knot with Ranma, because he defeated her and in return received the Kiss of Engagement, and now because she was intelligent enough to realize she would never beat Chad she surrendered, thus handing him the victory in their unofficial fight and consequently enabling him to receive the kiss binding them together.

"I see."

"Great-Grandmother be so proud of Shampoo," She bubbled with a giggle, "Indestructible-boy bring Amazon-tribe back to glory."

'Ichigo. Seems you're going to be a best-man.'

He didn't whether he was being sarcastic or resigning himself to his fate.


(With Ichigo and Ranma)


"So this is your pad, huh?" Ranma asked, looking up at the clinic Ichigo led them to, "Seems nice. Least I know where to go if you ever knock me up, eh?" She got her desired ruse out of the orange-headed Shinigami.

"Damn it. Don't ya have an off-switch or something?" He basically begged.

"I do, but you'll have to strip me to find it."

"Shouldn't have asked," He slumped as Ranma smiled 'innocently' at him, "Let's just go inside." He looked up and Ranma followed his trail, catching on to the implications.

"Ain't we going through the front door?" She asked.

"Na. My bo-." Eyes widening in realization, Ichigo jerked his head to the redhead with a look of astonishment on his face.

"What?" She asked, deciding to take the opportunity while presented to needle Ichigo, "I know I'm sexy as hell and all, but could ya not look at me like I'm a piece of meat pal?"

"You can see me?"

Ranma's sly grin turned dry, "Well, duh. That's why I'm here," She quipped, watching Ichigo pound his head to berate himself, "Why is that such a big deal all of a sudden anyway?"

"Most normal people don't have the spiritual essence necessary to see hollows or shinigamis," He explained, air-hopping to his balcony.

In one smooth, high leap, Ranma followed, landing beside him gracefully, "Well, Ranma Saotome ain't most 'people'," She bragged, "Heh. Chaos follows me wherever I go."

"I'm sure," He said dryly, sincerely hoping the rest of Nerima's residents don't miraculously start appearing in Karakura due to Ranma's presence, "Anyway, my family still don't know about me being a shinigami or my duties, and I would like to keep that under wraps."

"I see."

Cracking open his window, a blur shot past him, latching onto Ranma's chest, materializing into a small tiger plushy, its little stuffed paws sinking into Ranma's chest as its head fondled her breasts, "Boobies!~"

"What the hell?!" Ranma cringed, "What the hell is this thing?!"

"Kon, you little bastard!" Ichigo raged, roughly dislodging Kon from Ranma's chest and chucking the stuffed animal against the wall of his room.

"So that's what the perv's name is," Ranma said, her eyes darkening with malevolence.

"Yeah," Swerving his hand through his spiky tangerine-coloured hair, Ichigo climbed through his window, making his way over to the fallen Kon, "Resident perverted mod soul."

Roguishly shaking her head, Ranma neatly hopped into Ichigo's room, noticing the second Ichigo sprawled out on a single bed, "I'm starting to think this joint is almost as screwy as Nerima."

"Oh, you did not just compare Karakura Town with that loopy city!"

"What'cha gonna do about it if I did, pal?" She cheekily stuck her tongue out at him.

"Ichigo!" Kon whined indignantly, dragging himself to his little feet and extending a paw forward, "You jerk, disrespecting the great Kon-sama like that! I deserve boobies for my magnificence!" He was abruptly pinned into the ground by Ichigo's foot.

"Shaddup, you damn bastard before I give ya to Yuzu," A menacing expression appeared on his face, "You know, she's been missing her favourite dress-up doll to play with lately. How would ya like to keep her preoccupied? I'm sure she'll be relieved," Satisfied with his interrogation of Kon, Ichigo sauntered over to his body, leaving him sniffling on the ground.

"I wish nee-sama was here. She would understand me," He blissfully envisioned himself being cuddled against the chest of his beloved sister, "Ah!~ And she would cuddle me to her beautiful chest. Ah, nee-sama," He sighed dreamily, making Ranma shake her head.

"Yeah, well, she isn't. Deal with it," Ichigo commanded insouciantly, picking up his body. Ranma curiously observed his shinigami form majestically fade into his physical body.

A light trio of soft thuds echoed from his door, followed by an equally soft voice, "Onii-sama, is everything okay in there?"

Ichigo sighed, now dressed in a light blue long-sleeved dress shirt left unbuttoned to display his short-sleeved t shirt underneath, black trousers, and a pair of white socks fitted on his feet, "Come in, Yuzu," He said after glaring at Kon, the silent commandment evident in his eyes. Kon flopped down like a fish.

A small click sound echoed out to signify the opening of Ichigo's bedroom door, "Oh good," A small girl with shoulder-length hair that could've been interpreted as either dark blonde or light brown walked into view, wearing a short-sleeved white t shirt that accentuated her developing hips, a coffee-brown coloured skirt stretching down to her black socks-clad feet and a yellow apron tossed over her shirt.

"I wanted to tell yo-." She ceased her explanation once her eyes locked onto Ranma, "Onii-sama," She pointed at Ranma, "Who is that?"

Ranma strolled forward, a lopsided mischievous grin tugging at her lips.

'Oh god, here we go,' Ichigo face palmed himself.


"Uh. Hi?" Yuzu said awkwardly, donning a polite smile, "I'm Yuzu, Ichigo's little sister. You are?"

"Why, your new sister-in-law, of course!" Ranma remarked cheerfully, evoking a chain of different reactions from her audience. Yuzu just stared blankly, as if waiting for the punchline, so immersed she was she didn't even notice Kon pick his head up from the ground to goggle at Ichigo. And Ichigo himself…


…Mentally, of course.

'Fuck. My. Life!' He mentally groaned.

"Name's Ranma Saotome," She stated coyly, stylishly holding up the bangs of her hair with her hand, "But you can just call me sis," Noticing the distinct lack of reaction from the girl, Ranma dropped her sly demeanour, glancing forward, feeling disturbed by Yuzu's frighteningly blank expression, "Un. You okay, Yuzu?"

"I see," She closed her eyes and gave the redhead who had the audacity to declare herself as Yuzu's precious big brother's fiancée a smile that was so forced in nature Ranma could've sworn the temperature just dropped to zero degrees Celsius, "Well, I sincerely hope you'll have my onii-sama's best interests at heart, Ranma-chan, otherwise you and I will be having words."

"Uh." She said unsurely, "Alrighty then." How does one respond to that? She glanced behind her at Ichigo and even he seemed shocked by his sister's uncharacteristic threat.

Yuzu sighed, dispelling the malevolent aura around her, "Wonderful!" She clapped her hands, turning toward the door, "Oh! I almost forgot. Dinner's ready, onii-sama. I'll serve you two a plate. Come down for them."

"Wait! Yuzu," Ichigo said, deciding to take the chance to exact revenge on Kon.

Yuzu stopped, turning back to her brother with her soft chestnut eyes of unsullied purity, reminding Ranma of the eldest Tendo sister, "Yes?"

Smirking internally, Ichigo sauntered over to Kon, his expression darkening sadistically at the rain bullets of sweat that cascaded down his face, "Don't forget your toy," Sticking his foot underneath Kon, he kicked, propelling him forward into Yuzu's delighted embrace.

"Yay! I've been looking all over for you. I don't know how you keep getting into onii-sama's room though. It's like you have a mind of your own Mr bear," She smiled, situating Kon on her shoulder, "Thanks, onii-sama." She sauntered to the exit.

"No problem kiddo," He said casually, getting the bird from Kon which he returned without hesitation. When the sound of the door closing echoed, a cloud of awkward silence engulfed the room.

"Hah. Was I… threatened by her just now?"

"Think so."

"That was creepy."

"I agree."


Having decided to hold off on her explanation on how she obtained her curse to Ichigo, the two ventured down the stairs to join the rest of his family, and Ranma had to admit the house had a cosy feel to it. Having lived in the Tendo dojo for so long it felt kind of refreshing to actually be in a normal house.

"I'm u-." Just before Ichigo could finish his sentence, he was hammered to the ground with a swift roundhouse-kick.

"Oh, my delinquent son!" Ranma blinked. Instead of seeing a tall, broad-shouldered man with a head of spiky black hair and a five o clock shadow anguishing theatrically in reality, she envisioned a long-haired, sun-burned man doing it instead, "Sneaking out and bringing his fiancee in under his father's nose without his content to do adult-rated activities!'

'Gee. Is this Mr Tendo's long-lost brother or sumthin?' The striking similarity was almost scary.

Ranma was half expecting him to exclaim to the heavens, "How could the Gods be so cruel!'

"Where have I gone wrong?!"

Meh. Close enough.

"Damn it, Goat-face!" Ichigo raged, dragging himself to his feet and smashing his forehead against his father's, glaring mightily into his eyes, "What kind of lunatic father attacks his own son!?"

The dubbed Goat-face pushed back, "Don't blame me for your lack of guard, ungrateful son of mine!"

"C'mon! If that anyway to welcome your own son in the presence of his "girlfriend"!"

"All the incentive to keep your guard up when entering a room then. You don't wanna be shown up in front of her!"

"Ugh!" Grabbing his father's white lab coat, Ichigo threw him down and engaged him in an old-fashion scuffle with a dust ball masquerading their body parts save for their heads and occasionally their limbs, "I'll teach ya to mess with me Goat-face!"

"You're a hundred years too early for your old man son!"

"Gee. They sure get along like two peas in a pond," Ranma grinned sarcastically, "Nice dosage of deja vu too."

"Just ignore those idiots," A tone of calm nonchalance warranted Ranma's attention. Over in the kitchen section of the multi room complex where Yuzu was, sat another small girl, though she was slightly taller than her sister and took after their father in the hair department.

A crop of shoulder-length black hair fall neatly to her shoulders, with two bangs framing her impassive face. Contrasting Yuzu's girlish dress sense this girl wore a short-sleeved blue t shirt, black shorts over her crossed legs, and black sneakers fitted on her feet. She easily outclassed Akane in masculinity hands down.

"It's cool," Ranma shrugged, sauntering over to the tomboy, flopping down in the chair beside her, lazily throwing an arm back behind the arm rest, "I'm used to crazy."

She nodded, eyeing Ranma's slouching form through dark eyes of bored disinterest as she identified her as a tomboy, like her. They could get along, "So I'm guessing your Ichi-nii's new "fiancee" huh?"

"Something like that, yeah," Ranma grinned mischievously, suspiciously raising her voice, "The second Ichi-chan swept me off of my feet with his 'heroic' masculinity I knew I found my 'prince charming'."

"Oh! You did not just start calling me that!" Ichigo raged, only to get punched across the room by his old man.

"You let your guard down!"

Ranma snickered, looking back to Ichigo's sister to find her smirking at her, "I think I'm gonna like ya."

"Thanks," Ranma rubbed her nostrils with her index finger, "Name's Ranma Saotome by the way. Yours?"



A sweet aroma of expertly cooked food met Ranma's nostrils, making her drool as a plate of Teriyaki chicken meatballs with rice and greens landed in front of her.

"Here you go, Ranma," Yuzu happily served her.

"Thanks, Yuzu!" She said, wasting no time digging in.

'Good grief, she's more tomboyish than me,' Karin noted at Ranma's rapid eating pace.

"I really hope you stick around for a while," Yuzu insisted with a motherly demeanour, holding back a giggle when Ranma lifted up her head, half a meatball sticking out of her mouth that increased the adorable questionable look on her face.

She swallowed her dosage and grinned. Any normal girl in her position would've probably left after dinner, but when was Ranma Saotome – Aka Wild Horse and Heir to the Saotome School of Anything Goes Martial Arts – ever a contender for normality now? Cursed and stuck in a city with a bunch of self-centred jerks that only looked out for themselves and either wanted to tie the knot around her finger or beat her into submission.

Sign her up for a vacation in a city of normal folks. Well, she should probably define "normality," considering the eccentricity of Ichigo's father and jerky perversity of Kon, but Karin was cool, Yuzu was sweet, and Ichigo, well, it went without saying he was a riot to tease for entertainment.

"Sure thing!"

Hell, could be fun.