Yo wassup everyone? I'm back on this fic as well after two years! I am sorry for not updating in such a long time but I've been caught up in some events that changed me forever as I've said before that made me lose my motivation in writing. I'm doing better now so I hope this update doesn't disappoint and those who stuck with me know I will be posting extra fights that are leftovers from my main DW on here now. Hope you enjoy.


(A tan man in traditional clothing, soot around where his eyes are and a red wrapping around his head takes his knives and tosses them both at the camera.)

Apache: The fierce and merciless scalp taking death bringer of the American Southwest.

(An Apache is seen sneaking up on an unsuspecting settler before he slits the man's throat.)


(An East Asian man in orange monk robes takes his twin hooks and elegantly twirls around with them before stopping and points one at the camera.)

Shaolin Monk: China's quick-footed and agile kung fu master.

(A Shaolin monk bows to a bandit hoping to avoid a fight only for the latter to attack with his dao.)


To find out, we've assembled a team of world class fighters to test history's most lethal weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when two warriors go toe to toe.

No rules. No safety. No mercy. It's a duel to the death to decide who is...THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!

Here in our elite fight club we have gathered doctors, medical scientists, and weapons experts to test out the lethal arsenals wielded by each of our combatants to determine who would win a fight between two agile warriors.


Circa: 1830 A.D.

Height: 5' 7"

Weight: 140 lbs.

Armor: Rawhide Shield

Shaolin Monk

Circa: 1600 A.D.

Height: 5' 7"

Weight: 145 lbs.

Armor: None

''After two years of hiatus we've finally returned folks!'' DeadAliveManiac exclaimed excitedly, ''To celebrate our first match up in a while we're gonna have the most famous native American warrior the Apache go up against China's famous passive defender, the Shaolin monk.''

''This is an incredible match because there two have been compared numerous times but never actually fought until now.'' Zivon96 said.

''One warrior has bones and stone for weapons, but the other has forged steel weapons. Both are sneaky and strike you when you least expect it I'm just dying to see who wins this one.'' MKDemiGodzilla-Warrior added.

''So far in our regular fic these two have not suffered a loss yet, but today someone's streak is gonna be broken. Let's get the weapon review out the way gentlemen.'' Its Rice Man concluded.

The fierce scalp taker took down settlers on his land with a lethal, but simple arsenal.

Short Range: Knives

Mid-Range: Tomahawk

Long Range: Apache Bow

Special: War Club

In turn, the pacifist monk protected the monasteries with an arsenal of forged steel.

Short Range: Dao

Mid-Range: Twin Hooks

Long Range: Bi Shou

Special: Emei Piercers

For short range weapons, these two warriors brought with them blades that provided them the necessary cutting and stabbing power to drop their enemies.

The team now reviews the testing of the knives and dao and it literally doesn't take them more than five seconds to decide an edge.

''This has to go to the dao, it's a freaking sword made of steel DAMmit.'' DAM said half assedly.

''Agreed, metal always beats bone and stone no matter what.'' Zivon yawned.

Rice Man and Demigod didn't even speak and just nodded their heads in agreement.

In short range weapons, the edge goes to the Shaolin Monk for his dao.

For mid-range weapons, these two warriors used very versatile bladed weapons to hack and slash their opponents apart.

The team now reviews the testing of the tomahawks and twin hooks before coming to another easy decision.

''Twin hooks slice the tomahawks apart. While the tomahawk has more range given that the Apaches are known for throwing them you ain't getting up or getting the chance to throw them when you've been cut open.'' DAM explained.

''Again, steel.'' Zivon seconded.

Once again, Rice Man and Demigod just nodded in agreement.

In mid-range weapons, the edge goes to the Shaolin monk for his twin hooks.

Now, for long...

''Bow gets the edge narrator because they will utterly beat out throwing weapons.'' DAM said earning a nod from the other three.

You know, ya'll don't pay me at all to narrate your fic but whatever...

For long range weapons, the edge goes to the Apache for his bow.

And finally, for special weapons these two warriors brought with them two different but deadly sidearms to get the job done.

The team now reviews...

''Sorry to interrupt narrator but we've already decided to give this one to the emei piercers. They help the monk distract his opponents and then he can stab them with the other one. The war club is prone to breaking.'' DAM said earning a nod from the other three once again.

Fuck you guys. *sigh*

Anyway, in special weapons the edge goes to the Shaolin monk for his emei piercers since they don't break like the war club.

And now our resident metalhead and computer wizz Metal Harbinger will review the x-factors. Metal?

''Let's do this.'' said the wizz.

''For training the monk had a 98 to the Apache's 80.''

''For killer instinct the Apache had a 93 to the monk's 80.''

''For intimidation the Apache has a 90 to the monk's 34.''

''For ferocity the Apache had an 88 to the monk's 28.''

''And finally for endurance both even out with a 90.''

Now with the testing out of the way Metal will now run the simulator one-thousand times in a battle to the death.

Who will win between two quick and agile warriors?

''In the end only one stands, let's see who it is.'' Metal said as he presses the button.


In a small forest near a Chinese monastery a lone Shaolin monk was seen taking a leisurely stroll. Him and his fellow monks have been encountering a strange tribe of warriors unlike they have ever seen and recently their monastery was raided by these warriors which resulted in a few of his fellow monks being killed.

On his person he carried his dao and had two bi shou hidden in his sleeve while his twin hooks were further down the path should he need them.

Right now he was told there was a sighting of one of these strange warriors in the nearby woods so he decided to investigate the issue and cleanse this new evil.

No more and no less.

Elsewhere in the woods a lone Apache was seen heading toward the Shaolin monastery to survey it for another raid with his tribe. The first time they only managed to inflict a few casualties on the local Shaolin monks but this time after conducting his survey he and his tribe will for sure kill every last one of those monks.

Soon the two warriors crossed paths with each other in a clearing and immediately began eyeing each other as they just stood in place. The monk would be the first to make a move and simply lowered his weapons before giving the Apache a bow hoping to avoid a fight.

The Apache just stared at the monk before quickly stringing an arrow onto his bow and fired at the monk. The monk was too quick however and merely jerked his head to his side to avoid being struck in the face with the projectile and spots the Apache taking a knife and tosses it at him.

The Chinese warrior didn't have time to dodge so he opted to bring his sword up and swats the blade away and back flips out of the way as the Apache drew another knife and charged toward him with a war cry.

The native American warrior went in for a series of slashes with his knife but the monk was too fast and was able to dodge every attack he dished out. Annoyed, the Apache goes in for one more swing only for the Chinese monk to duck under it and goes to swing the dao at his feet but the Apache expected this move and quickly hopped over the dao and with his knife tosses it at the monk hitting him in the upper arm causing him to drop the dao.

Seeing that he drew first blood the Apache grinned with glee and takes his two tomahawks strapped to his waist and goes to bring it down on the monk as he was distracted by his arm injury but again, his training allowed him to fight through the pain and the monk responded by performing a roundhouse kick to the Apache's gut sending him falling to the ground which gives him the opportunity to make a break for it.

Having the wind knocked out of him the grounded Apache looks up to see the monk making a break for it and not wanting his prey to get away he gets back on his feet and chases the monk.

Hearing his opponent running toward him the monk takes out his two bi shou from his sleeves and with a graceful spin hurls the throwing knives at the native warrior who rolls under the blades and gets on one knee and throws the tomahawks back at him in return. Again, the monk dodges the projectiles and runs a few meters ahead before drawing his emei piercers which gives the Apache the chance to pick up his tomahawks and goes to meet the Shaolin monk who held his piercers defensively in front of him.

The Apache does the same with his tomahawks and the two warriors took little baby steps toward each other before they circled around for a minute or two. After a moment of silence the Apache attacks first with a war cry and goes to swing his weapons horizontally but the monk flips out of the way but the Apache again expected him to make a move like this and tosses one of his tomahawks and manages to hit the monk on his side.

Letting out a cry of pain the monk fell to the ground and goes to pull the tomahawk out of his side only for the Apache to charge forth his his other tomahawk and goes to bring it down on his opponent's head but the more agile monk rolls out of the way and the Apache only struck the grass and dirt with his weapon.

His training pulls through for him again and ignoring the pain the monk kicks the Apache in the jaw causing him to lose his tomahawk and continues running away.

Rubbing his jaw the now pissed off Apache draws his war club and shield from his back and continues to chase the monk as he was now more determined than ever to kill him.

The monk runs off into the woods for a good five minutes before finally coming across his twin hooks. Hearing the Apache approaching him from behind he quickly hooks the two blades together and twirls around just as the Apache comes within reach and out of reflex the native warrior raises his rawhide shield in defense but he would find out he made a huge mistake.

The twin hooks sliced clean through the shield and in the process severed his hand at the wrist. The native warrior screams in pain and looks at his stump in horror and despite the pain he was in he still had the energy to toss his club at the monk albeit weakly.

With his opponent weaponless and down one hand the monk twirled again and this time the Apache's gut was sliced open by the hooks and the shocked native gasps in horror as he watches his intestines spill to the ground. The rapid blood loss causes the Apache to fall backwards never to rise again.

The Apache now defeated, the monk sets his blades down before bowing in remorse for his opponent.


Winner: Shaolin Monk

Shaolin Monk: 550

Dao: 125

Twin Hooks: 401

Bi Shou: 1

Emei Piercers: 23

Apache: 450

Knives: 99

Tomahawk: 251

Apache Bow: 90

War Club: 10


Training: 98/Training: 80

Killer Instinct: 80/Killer Instinct: 93

Intimidation: 34/Intimidation: 90

Ferocity: 28/Ferocity: 88

Endurance: 90/Endurance: 90

Armor Failure Rate

No Armor - Rawhide Shield: 99%

In a battle of two agile and sneaky warriors it would be the Shaolin monk who emerged as the winner with 55% of the wins compared to the Apache's 45% thanks to his superior steel weapons. His twin hooks being absolutely lethal with over 400 kills by itself.

''No surprise there, steel wins any day of the week man!'' DAM said.

''I was leaning toward the Apache but hey, what good is throwing your weapon gonna do when you're fighting someone who's weapons are metal and just as versatile? Cough, twin hooks.'' Zivon seconded.

''Yeah..steel wins pretty much every time. The Apache did well though so we can give him the credit he deserves." Demigod added.

''Chalk this one up to the monks of the Shaolin monastery.'' Rice Man concluded.

(The monk was seen meditating back at his monastery. Hanging on the wall behind were the weapons of the Apache which will prove useful against future raids.)