The wedding was perfect, even it was for two dogs.
The way Total looked at Akila reminded me of how I sometimes look at Max when she's to busy to notice, in complete adoration. The wedding did not help my situation though. It just made everything more difficult.
Throughout the wedding I was constantly reminded that love does not differentiate, the backgrounds and differences of two beings shouldn't matter. Total and Akila are a perfect example of this, Total is around half the height of Akila, not to mention he can talk perfect English and has wings on his back. Meanwhile Akila is a purebred normal every day dog, trained for Antarctica expeditions.
Its weird how things work out. Total and Akila, who are completely different from each other, get to live happily ever after but Max and I, who have grown up together and know everything about each other, can't. I love her but I know we can't be together, it's too dangerous.
I left the reception early before the rest of the flock, despite the fact that they hadn't even cut the cake yet. For a while I have been thinking about what I was going to do regarding the situation with Dylan, but it was during the ceremony when Max and I accidently caught each other gaze that I made my decision. I had organized everything in the past couple of weeks but I still hadn't decided whether to actually go through with my plan until today.
As I flew high over the land I tried to think of what I would say in my letter to Max, it was the only thing I hadn't prepared already. I tried to mentally picture the words in my head so I could remember them for later but no mater how hard I tried I couldn't think of anything to say. Giving up I resorted to looking down at all the cars traveling far below me and I had the sudden realization that flying by yourself is actually quite boring.
Half an hour later I was sitting at the kitchen table trying to write my goodbye letter to Max. I had already had several attempts but all of them had so far ended up being deleted. I didn't think it would be this hard to write one simple letter. So far the only progress I had made was writing "Dear Max". I guess I never have been very good at expressing my feelings so that might explain why writing this letter is almost impossible.
I knew I was running out of time, so I started to make a list of things to include in my letter. I thought about why I was doing this, why I was leaving the flock, my family, the people I loved with all my heart. Yes, even Angel who tried to kill me not that long ago.
I thought about how much I loved Max, how she looked when she was bossing the flock around, when she was asleep and even when she was fighting for her life. My fingers started to race over the keyboard. The words started to pour onto the screen as more ideas came into my mind.
Once finished I started to carefully write everything onto the blank paper beside me. I thought it would be nicer for Max if the letter she got from me looked personal, in my own handwriting. Besides, the only reason I was typing it up on the laptop was to check my spelling and because it was going to be a lot easer to get rid of any of my failed attempts.
After finishing my letter I logged off and placed the laptop where I had found it when I had arrived at the house. I was running out of time so I quickly went around checking everything was where it was before we left for the wedding, that way Max and the rest of the flock will get the impression that I had been gone for ages.
I had hidden the gear and money I needed around the house so after gathering everything I walked out to the edge of the deck.
I jumped, extending my wings and letting the wind carry me away without looking back.
"Goodbye Max" I whispered as I flew away.