15Author Note: Angel – Sarah McLachlan
Chapter 6: Angel
Barba sat in his dark apartment. He held a glass of scotch in one hand and Olivia's photo in the other. He remembered everything now. He didn't want to believe it. But he couldn't forget now no matter how hard he tried. He couldn't force the event out of his head. They were unbending facts now. He had to except it.
She was gone. She had bled to death in his arms on the steps of the court house. He had spent the first week after her death locked in his apartment. He was unable to except she was gone. He had gone to her funeral. Stood there with the squad. When he got home he tried to sleep but he couldn't he had sat in his kitchen all night. He his mind changed the details. He couldn't handle her being gone. He thought he had been calling her. Talking to her every night. He had been talking to the walls. The silence the only response.
He had avoid the court house; Moving cases to other prosecutors. He couldn't handle going back. The day he finally went. He was forced to face the spot where her heart had stopped beating. The place he had lost the love of his life.
He imagined her standing there. She had been wearing the clothing she had been shot in. he had only replayed what he thought looking down at her moments before the shooting.
He had walked to the diner and sat their alone. Talking to himself. Thinking how he wished he could have had a life with her. Told her in the right moment he loved her. Told her how much she meant to him. Instead he had to tell her as she died. She had used her last words to tell him she loved him too.
After the day in the diner he was convinced she was still with him. They had sat and had coffee. And before he lost her again he was going to tell her he loved her.
He cleaned his whole apartment, made diner and once again sat down with her. Ate the meal, drank the wine. They had talked and danced. They had kissed and told each other that they loved each other. They had fallen asleep in each other's arms.
Really he had drank a whole bottle of wine to himself and passed out in his clothing on the couch.
Yet somehow until the moment Nick said she was gone. He had believed his fantasy. He had believed things were right.
Barba took a moment from his thoughts and refilled his scotch. He looked at the picture he held. She was smiling. Her chocolate brown eyes looked right at him. She was beautiful. He loved her and she had loved him. She was the most passionate woman he had ever met. And she was gone.
" I love you Olivia... Goodbye my angel." He spoke softly to the empty apartment.
He placed the photo on the kitchen counter next to her case file. No one had found the shooter.
He wouldn't let it rest. He would get justice for her.
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