Everyone says that when you're in love, you just know. But is this really it?
This fanfiction is written by Chaos.
I exhale and the smoke curls around the bedroom, the sound of crickets and Maka's soft sleep noises fill the room. I look down at her, curled in a small ball connected to my thigh. Her perfect blond hair falls in her face and shifts with every breath. Her paper pale skin glows in the light of my room.
All I want in this world is to run my fingers down her spine.
Brush her hair from her face.
Kiss her soft cheek.
Fuck I have to get out of here. I put out my cigarette on my bedside table and gingerly step out of bed, afraid of waking her. I glance in the mirror on the door as I get dressed. Wild white locks fall in awkward directions, sharp teeth, and daunting red eyes stare back at me. I pull my jacket over my bare, scar marked chest and head out of the apartment.
As I make my way around the dark city I can't help but feel ashamed of myself for fantasizing such things about my partner. I am her weapon, she is my meister, nothing more, nothing less. I walk through the dark dimly lit alleys of Death City, no particular destination in mind.
I look up to the moon, a dark and haunting smile sits upon it as if to mock me and my weakness. I remember the way she sounds, the way her soul wavelength is strong and stable accepting my dark, egotistical, soul.
Her soul is pure, and light, and innocent, yet strong.
When she gets upset at night she likes to sleep in my bed. She says I make her feel safe. The heat of her body radiates through my skin and sends shivers up my back.
"God dammit Soul, pull yourself together." I mutter under my breath. Something suddenly shifts. Blare the cat sits neatly on her pumpkin, to my right.
"Hey soul~" She purrs as she transformed into her big breasted *cough cough* appealing human body. I frown at her. She bats her eyes as she slithers her arms around around my neck.
"What are you doing out so late?" She giggles, "Did mean old Maka throw you out?"
Her chest if firm against my bare one. I remain silent.
"Well don't you worry you can just come home with me." She smiles and takes my hand. Do I really do this?
I decide to follow.
"Can I get you something to drink?" She asks. I sit on her couch, picking at a loose thread on my pants. She places a glass in front of me. Amber liquid sloshes around the bottom of the glass. She sits, more on top of me than next to me. Her slender fingers run lines up and down my thighs, trying to entice me. She nuzzles my neck as purple strands of hair itch my shoulders. My body wants her, but when I close my eyes, I only think of Maka. As I sit here, she lays sleeping in my bed. My heart pulls me toward her, with a truth so strong I'd be a fool not to chase it.
And yet I stay here, knowing we could never be anymore than partners. Blairs smooth humming and light touch pulls me closer to her. I slide my arms around her waist and the dark room falls away as I drown my feelings for Maka in Blaire's mouth. But it feels wrong. This isn't affection, its an animal want. Its lust, its aggressive. I push her down and let that want take over for the night, silencing my true feelings.
I woke up at four a.m. and walked home. I thought sleeping with blair would make me feel better, but now I just feel empty. Hollow. I open the front door as quiet as I can and fall onto the couch face first. Maybe if I lay here long enough I'll just wither away and I won't have to deal with this anymore.
I hear light footsteps and the door creak. Maka must be up. I sit up and fuss with my hair. She sits next to me, my heart skips a beat. She smells like vanilla and lemons.
"Good morning Soul." Her voice already cheery. "How long have you been awake?"
"...Not long." She didn't even notice I was gone. She mutters something about breakfast and goes to the kitchen. I should go help her. Yeah that would be the responsible thing to as her… Roommate? Weapon partner? Potential love interest? I don't even know anymore. I run my fingers through my hair one last time, zip my jacket and get up to go.
"Maka I'm leaving!" I shout as I rush out the door. I cannot spend another second in that apartment.
I walk down the streets of Death City and watch the lights flicker in and out. Going from dark to light as quickly as my emotions, twisting and fading between numbness and desire. Taking me from extreme to the next. This city seems empty this early in the morning. Desolate. My footsteps echo off the bricks as I wander in no particular direction.
Maka's image forms in my mind. I remember the first summer we spent together after we became partners. We decided to go to Italy and see the ocean. I didn't think it would happen. It's not like people plan to be attracted to each other. But Maka just had to go and wear an extremely small green bikini, stealing my body and soul. Her waist was thin and elegant, her legs, long and pale, her hair, soft and sweet. She was the epitome of beauty, of grace, her innocence transcends light itself. You could not find a finer human being on this planet.
Her translucent skin ripples as a smile-
A hard, heavy object impacts the side of my head, knocking me to the ground. "Aha! I am the all powerful Black Star! And I have come to take your soul!"
"What the fuck was that for jackass?!" I quickly pull myself up and dust off, roughly grabbing Black Stars shirt.
"Oh Soul." He says as he looks around. "You're here."
"Yes I am." I release black Stars shirt as Tsubaki runs up behind him. "Why you asking?"
"Black star!" Tsubaki whines as she catches her breath. "Hey Soul. Maka was looking for you."
My heart skips a beat, I'm sure my face grows red. Tsubaki and Black Star are too distracted to notice. I ruffle my hair. Get your shit together.
"Oh?" I try to sound casual.
"Yeah, she said you ran out this morning and that if we happened to find you to tell you to call her." My heart does not calm at the thought of calling her.
"Thanks, I'll call her now. Don't go anywhere, I need Tsubaki's notes for Stein's class."
I take a few steps away from them before making the call.
Get it together
"Hello?" Shit she sounds worried.
"Hey, I heard you were worried about me?"
"Well you ran out as soon as I saw you. I thought something was wrong."
"Oh no, nothing like that! I just remembered, I had… Um… Plans! Yeah plans with Black Star."
Black Star immediately pipes in at the sound of his name. (Being the self centered twat waffle he is..)
"What? no we didn't, I had plans to get souls with Tsubaki all day, I wouldn't complicate such important plans with a lesser being such as yourself-" His rant is cut off by my fist striking his windpipe.
"So yeah I have plans with Black Star pretty much all night. Don't wait up." Crap that sounded meaner than I meant it too. I just really can't be alone with her right now.
"I actually have plans tonight so I wont wait for you." She immediately hangs up the phone. Shit.
Tsubaki gives me a sad smile. Black Star glares at me.
"Since you said you have plans anyways, we're throwing a party tonight and you should come." Tsubaki says warmly. Black Star mumbles something about gracing me with his presence.
"Yeah that could be cool." Thank god for Tsubaki.
Black Star turns to walk away, calling Tsubaki to follow. I hope, I hope things work out with Maka. I look up to the sun whose smile won't fade. It's mocking me. Always.
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