109A/N: And here's where the story really begins.
Penny landed on her feet, but wasn't expecting it and she buckeld to the floor.
The wooden floor.
And not even a stained hardwood floor like in her parents' refurbished bedroom. It was the kind of unfinished wood that was well-worn, aged and softened by thousands of footsteps. It creaked when she tried to right herself, like there was no foundation underneath it.
So not the ground floor of CalTech. I didn't just fall through the floor. Where the hell am I? she wondered. I landed on my ass, not my head, so this isn't a dream. The fuck were they trying to do with that machine?
She was in a small room made entirely of the same wood as the floor, and instead of a door there was a small ladder built into the wall that led to a trapdoor in the ceiling. Her first thought was that she was in some kind of dungeon, but that didn't make much sense; dungeons were usually stone and dank, not...oddly comforting wood. Then she looked around the room itself and found a small bed attached to another wall with drawers underneath. The middle of the room was dominated by a table and chair that were both nailed to the floor. There was a map on the table, held in place by a fist-sized rock and a ship in a bottle. It reminded her of a treasure map.
Penny rubbed her butt where she landed and went to the tiny window adjacent to the bed. When she saw the view she gasped.
It was a beautiful view of the ocean with what looked like land in the distance.
Penny felt her stomach drop but refused to believe what she was seeing. She crossed the small room and climed the ladder that was almost like a vertical staircase and opened the hatch.
The bright sunlight made her squint; when her eyes adjusted she was face-to-chest with a man's semi-visible chest. The chest led up to a long neck and a familiar face: Sheldon's face.
Penny gasped again, but not because of the view.
Sheldon had grabbed her by the throat and shoved her against the wall.
Their noses almost touching, he growled, "Who are you and how did you get onto my ship? And why were you in my cabin? No one is allowed in my cabin."
"Shel...don," she choked out. Startled by his given name on this strange woman's lips, he let her go; she gasped for breath and continued.
"Sheldon, what the hell? Where are we?" She noticed his clothes now and had to stop her thoughts in their tracks. The black linen shirt had a deep v-neck, hence the chest hair on display, and his leather pants were tighter than any of his chinos had ever been. Her eyebrow raised in appreciation before she could rally herself again. "And why are you dressed like the Dread Pirate Roberts? I didn't even think you liked the Princess Bride."
She reached for him and he grabbed her wrist and twisted until she was pressed into the wall, arm up her back. Panic flowed through her; this was not her Sheldon.
"I'll ask you again," he whispered into her ear, sending shivers down her left side. "Who are you? How did you get onto my ship? Why were you in my cabin? And how do you know my name?"
Penny decided not to fight him for the moment and just answer his questions.
"My name is Penny. I fell through what had to'a been a portal my friends made by accident, your cabin's just where I ended up. And you look exactly like one of my friends who made the hole I fell through."
The angle from which Penny could see pirate-Sheldon's face was awkward, but even from there she could tell his brain was crunching the information she gave him.
"A portal?" he asked in confirmation.
Penny nodded. "Had to be. Big green hole in the ground, and suddenly I'm falling through your ceiling."
He let her go after another moment, deciding she was telling the truth. He nodded, mostly to himself.
"As you have guessed, my name is Sheldon. However, not many people know that. To the general public I am known simply as Cooper, Captain of The Enterprise." He quirked an eyebrow and a glint of amusement flashed in his eyes, though he didn't smile. "You may not believe it, but 'Sheldon' doesn't really strike fear in the hearts of one's enemies."
Penny snorted. "Well, you could always call yourself 'Sheldor the Conqueror.'"
Sheldon's other eyebrow joined it's twin. "You know, that's not half bad. Too bad I don't do much conquering." A slight glint and a ghost of a smirk. "I could easily change that."
This man who both was and was not Sheldon Cooper looked her up and down, taking note of everything. She suddenly felt awkward in her cut-off shorts, tank top, and flip flops.
"Come back into my cabin, Penny. We'll discuss this more in relative comfort."