It was painful. It clawed and scratched and bit and tore, snarling wordlessly in the pit of her metaphorical belly. It was like liquid fire ran through her heart, watching the very same one she protected, her partner, teetering on the edge.
And sometimes she wondered if it were really worth it, pulling him away from something that would grant him a happiness that had been long since denied to him. For, truly, while she desperately wanted to fight, to eliminate the cloying shadows of Dark Matter that haunted the world, she knew that her priorities had shifted. Perhaps, once upon a time, she could have disregarded his happiness and well-being to push them both further in a war that had been fought for millennia, claiming so many lives and causing so much pain. But now…she wanted nothing more than to make sure that her partner, sweet and kind and gentle as he was, was happy, in anyway she could. Happy and safe, and if it took him falling into that darkness, then so be it.
But for now she couldn't let him, else the other pieces take notice and scream at her, scream traitortraitortraitor and send them all—all three of them and their tenuous balance and truce—spiraling into a chaos that would set the world aflame and they would be lost, the war would be lost.
All she wanted was for him to be happy and safe. She knew that life and the world had long since stolen it away from him, and that they were his one last chance. For if he fell—and he would, soonsoonsoon, so soon—then they would fall after him, following with joy in their hearts and minds breaking. That Noah would follow, she knew, for selfish reasons, to hold on desperately to the last remnants of his once-family and the bright happy-peace they could have once had, had the world not been cruel and harsh, stealing it away before it could be realized.
And, she supposed, her reasons were selfish as well. She couldn't bring herself to let go of her partner, of the child she had guarded and watched over, despite how much suffering she had brought him. He was hers, and she would follow him, no matter where he led. No others would touch him, he was her Accommodator, and she was his Innocence.
And despite that cold, hard center to his heart—for Red had been cold, and nasty, hardened to the cruelty of the world even as he retaliated and spewed forth his own chill words and hatred—her partner was so, so warm and kind, loving her even though she had hurt him so much.
It was painful. But it was also rapture, following her one and only partner, her Accommodator, no matter where he led her. And she would follow.
Even if it meant naught but death and destruction and fire. He was hers.
He was all that mattered to her, in the end.
And so ends this threeshot! Can you guess who's perspective this one was from?
And of course, I'm torturing her/him/it, just like I tortured Neah and Allen. What is wrong with me? I don't mean to!