Unfortunately I don't own the Thunderbirds nor will I ever in the future

Darkness. That's all I knew. I was trapped in it with no way out. I couldn't even remember how I got here. I felt like I was trapped in a small cage that was forever getting smaller and smaller and I was going with it. It was like I was shrinking through every particle and still I was getting smaller and smaller. I was shrinking and I just wanted to get out. As if my wish had been answered I the bottom of the hole with a thud and a very loud voice boomed all around

"Can't…give…Alan" I only just managed to get parts of whatever they said

"Guys… he's brain dead… he won't wake up" I felt kicking at screaming at that, if I'm brain dead then how come I can hear you and feel like I should be dead because I have a major headache from trying to figure this all out.

"Gordo he had been like this for about four months"

"I know…it's…it's just…so hard saying goodbye"

"Can I go first?" someone asked in a familiar voice

"Of course, well be in the waiting room when you done" What the hell was going on? Saying goodbye? I am very much alive thank you very much. I just had to move or open my eyes or something. Slowly instead of being trapped in a cage surround my darkness, I feel my eyes being to open a bit. I can just make out someone beside my but obviously my eyes are still not open far enough

"I'm so sorry Al. I should have know something was up when you had gone out of radio contact for a few minutes, but instead I sit up on my 'bird yelling at you. Do you remember what the last thing I said to you was, I said that you needed to learn to grow and until then you could just go and die for all I care. I didn't mean Al; I swear I didn't mean it. Why didn't you tell one of us that you were in pain. We would have listened or at least I would have, Allie I'm your big brother next time PLEASE tell me but you have to wake up first…"

Then it hit me. That's how I ended up on this position. We had been out on a rescue and there was someone still trapped in the door way of the building after I got three little kids out, I had ran back and as soon as the last little kid was out the fire finally engulfed the building and it collapsed. I had been lucky getting out but not so lucky because something heavy had hit me on the head, which sent me sprawling out of the building. Scott then came and dragged me back to where the 'birds were packed and Dad, Scott, John and Virgil all yelled at me and telling me to be more responsible and was I trying to kill myself. Luckily John's voice pulled me out of my day dream or whatever that was.

"Virgil is convinced that it is his fault, he kept saying that it was his duty as the medic to make sure that you were ok and he should have noticed that you were in pain…" He starts sobbing uncontrollably

"BUT I AM STILL HERE" I felt like screaming at them, why do they have to be so difficult. HELP ME

"We could have spent hours looking at the stars together or we could have done anything that you wanted to… we still can. PLEASE all you have to do is open those lovely big blue eyes of yours" He sobbed looking up but my eyes remained how they were "I didn't think so… goodbye Sprout, I will never forget you. I love you more than you will ever know" and with that he hurried out the door, if he had looked back he would have noticed my hand lift up in the air slightly but unfortunately it had fallen back down by the time Virgil had come in

"Hey Sprout, Scott still isn't ready to say goodbye yet, neither is Gordon, I can't blame them really and dad has already said his goodbyes, now we don't even know where he is. If I had my way we wouldn't be saying goodbye at all, instead we would be at home eating dinner and I would be asking you how your day went and if you wanted to come and hang out with me then you and me would go up to dad's office and beg him to let you be home schooled. I'll make you a deal, I'll talk to dad about letting you be home schooled and all you have to do is wake up" like John he started sobbing uncontrollably

"DEAL" I screamed but I was still trapped in my cage "That's sounds like a perfect deal" Now all I have do is wake up, come on. WAKE UP. I can't stand hearing them cry over me

"PLEASE Allie. I can't stand to lose you. This is my entire fault. The doctor said that if we had found out that you were hurt while you were still awake, you would have made a full recovery. Why Alan. You can't leave us, we still NEED you, I STILL need you… Allie it was so scary. Scott was screaming for help and we all rushed to him… we…we thought Scott had been hurt or something but… but the moment I saw you limp in his arms… I knew I had screwed up big time… and it had cost me my youngest brother. I'm surprise you still breathing now, the doctor's don't know how long you weren't breathing for…" obviously tying to hold it together "PLEASE wake up, I feel so alone without you, I mean we weren't as close as you and Gordon, hell no one could ever be that close to you apart from him but I never told you this and you will probably never know but you were what got me through mom's death, because of you I could say goodbye but… but I won't have you to get over this death, I guess what I'm trying to say is life will NEVER be the same without you" He left not long after that.

I was dreading the one-sided conversation that I was going to have. I felt so helpless. I was that usually comforted the others but I couldn't do ANYTHING, I was completely helpless. I was surprised when Gordon came in next; I felt kind of hurt that Scott hadn't come yet and I thought the next person would have been him.

"I don't even know how to start. This is just so unfair."

"You can say that again" I mutter to myself

"I don't want to say goodbye. I don't want you to go; I want you to stay here. You can't leave me alone here. Who am I going to freak out the smother hens with? Virgil is pretty hopeless and besides he's a back up smother hen, and John, well is way more hopeless at pulling pranks than Scott. Please Allie, I know you have probably heard this a million times from the other's but you have to wake up…you just have to. I'm not the youngest, you are. I…I can't do this" He choked on sobs for a few more minutes, every time it was like a knife piecing through my heart

"I love you, Sprout, don't you ever think any different" He leaned forward and planted a kiss on my forehead before running out of the room. It wasn't fair, I never wanted to hurt my closest brother and yet I am doing that in the worst way possible.

"PLEASE someone help me wake up, I don't want them to go through this" I cried, this is so not fair, why can't I just wake up. I want to wake up, I just want to go home and spend time with my brothers. Why can't I just have a normal life like my brothers, trouble just seems to follow me around like a lost little puppy.

"Hey Allie, I don't think you can here but I guess one can always hope, I…I just wanted you to know that I am so…so sorry" Scott chokes on a sob as I feel a tear fall onto my cheek " Damn it… why Alan? Why? You were supposed to grow old and have a full life. You can't… you can't…die"

"COME ON ALAN. YOU ARE STRONGER THAN THIS SO WAKE THE HELL UP" I commanded myself, slowly my eyes began to open, relief filled my whole body and I gladly welcomed the white room in. It was 10 times better than the dark and shrinking cage I was in earlier, however Scott head is resting on my hand, feel like moving it or something to let him know that I am awake but something stopped me, instead I listen to him talking

"But there is nothing I can do…nothing. But that's not the worst part, do you know what the worst part is?" he asks "Virgil is wrong. It's my fault" He then starts crying again and my hand starts to feel wet "I'm the oldest and on top of that I'm the field commander, I…I should have asked if you were ok or have you checked. But did I? No. I was too busy yelling at you to notice that fact that you were hurt. That's why you didn't even say I word, you were in pain, weren't you? HOW could I NOT have noticed that? I failed haven't I; I failed big time as an older brother, friend and commander"

I was about to say that it was mainly my fault and no one is perfect but before I could get a word in, Scott cut me off

"You did nothing wrong, you were only saving that kids life…you don't deserve this… you did nothing wrong, it's not fair" he sobbed again, and again I was about to say something but he cut me off

"Please Alan, we need you, heck I would never admit this to the other but I NEED YOU…" I was surprised that he still hadn't even lifted his head "I should be the one lying there" he said sourly "I'm the one that deserves to…"

"Don't you dare even finish that sentence Scott" I say hastily, surprised by the fact that my voice sounded kind of normal "You did nothing wrong, so I don't EVER want to hear you say that again" I said upset that he would even say that. Surprised Scott jerked his head up and looked me in the eyes

"Allie? Are you really awake?"

"Na Scott, that's why I have been lying here for awhile listening to all you guys cry and beg me to wake up and telling me how sorry you are"

"SPROUT… you were listen to all of that weren't you"

"Yeah, I kind of woke up earlier, about a few minutes before John's goodbye"

"Before I get the nurse I just have want to ask one question… If you were awake, why didn't you open your eyes?"

"I…I don't know, I mean I was screaming at myself to open my eyes but… I don't know"

"Then how come you opened your eyes before?"

"Haven't you figured that out already?" I sighed, although one look at his face told me otherwise "You, I opened my eyes because of you, right after you said 'you can't die' I practically screamed at myself"

"But that's why I came in here last, I thought if you had any chance of waking up it would have been for Gordo"

"Yeah don't get me wrong, Gordo speech was short compared to the other's but when he started crying it was like a knife stabbing me repeatedly so I guess that helped"

"Makes sense I guess" he seemed happy with that answer and reached for the nurse's button. I don't really remember the next few minutes but I can remember a pile of doctor's and nurse's came in and started pushing buttons and asking me question then they all left like there was a swarm of bees after them. "Well that was quick" I jumped a little at the sound of his voice, in all the madness I completely forgot that he was in here

"Are you ok?" I asked as he looked like he was on the brink of a meltdown


"Do you want a hug?"

"Are you sure that safe, I mean you technically just came back to life?"

"Yeah, the doctors said I was allowed to sit up but only if it didn't make me dizzy"

"Well then in that case" and the next thing I knew I was sitting up, with my head resting on his shoulder

"Don't you ever scare me like that again… did you know that you nearly managed to give your favorite brother a heart attack"

"Was Gordo ok after that?" I relied cheekily

"WHAT, you love THAT fish face more than me… if that was true then you would have woken up for him"

"I was only joking Scott, calm down. And yeah you were right, you are my favorite brother"

"I am? I was only joking"

"Gordon is my closest brother but… but he's not my favorite, I mean sure it hurt when he was in here sobbing and asking me to wake up but when you said that I can't die, I…I don't know, although I did yell at myself 'Come on Alan. You are stronger than this so wake the hell up' and that certainly worked". I closed my eyes but I was careful not to fall back asleep and we just stayed like we were, I don't think Scott was any where ready to let go of me. We must have stayed like that for ages because I could hear the rest coming in behind me and started yelling







"Guys calm down; the doctor said it was ok…"


"Well done Scott" with that John stormed out after him

"Gordon… you haven't even said a word, are you ok"

"Yeah, I was just thinking, there would be no reason for you to disobey the doctor's orders as there was a slight chance that he could wake up… unless…"

"Unless I already had and the doctor said it was ok" I replied, while opening my eyes and turning to face him "Hey Fish face"

"O my… you're awake, I… I… how? When? Why didn't you come and get us?"

"Go and get the others first, I think they might want to know"

"And why can't you?"

"Because they just bit my bloody head of"

"Good point... I'll be back in a second"

(1 minute later)

"Sprout? Are you…"

"Don't you dare ask me if I'm ok" I snapped back while Scott gently put me back down in my bed "Why would you yell at Scott and how could you say that he killed me?"

"Look I'm sorry I shouted at you Scott, I was just upset of Alan"

"Quick question, how do we contact dad"

"I… you were listening?"

"Yeah I have been aware of what was going on around me about a few minutes before John's goodbye" I replied, trying to keep me the smirk of my face but obviously I failed

"Oh no, he's got blackmail material on us" Gordon said noticing my smirk and failing back into one of the hospital chairs

"Yeah Scott and Virgil especially"

"Oh no, I think when we get home we better watch out for Sprout's pranks"

"Yeah… hey I thought I was your favorite brother" Scott complained

"No I am" 3 other's replied at the same time, then they all looked at me for an answer

"Sorry guys, but Scott's right, although I would NEVER betray Gordon unlike I would Scott, so don't worry Gordo, you little goodbye speech is safe with me unlike the rest of yours" I replied smirking at the rest "And I'm guessing that Virgil will want his never told to the others again"

"Uh oh, we are so doomed" Virgil cried out

"Correction you 3 are so doomed, I'm his partner, and so I'm fine" Gordon said looking at me like he wasn't quite sure

"Yeah, although if I were you I would watch your pranks on me" I replied cheekily

"DONE", which caused the rest of us to start laughing at how freaked out he had been. It was certainly nice to be home again.