Zim the Warlord: Irken Reversion

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim or anything else here

AN Hey guys. Long week and some. Due to doubts of my long term finacial situation, landlords being assholes, and other things, I have officially moved out of my old home. Oi, basically got the 'kicked out' notice on my birthday. Anyway, living with my mom a few towns over now. she's currently got my items quarunteened until we're sure no bed bugs spread, hence my lack of updates. I remembered I had this in my famfic account's docx, so thought I'd post it.

I'm...adjusting pretty well, new town and all that, but not being able to write for my stories is screwing with my mind a bit. Other than that, things are going well, I suppose. Anyway, I'm hopung ti be back to more regular updates by the end if the month.

Malinda Dunn had been in many worrisome situations before. From teen pregnancy to a standoff at gun point, and all the way back to that one night she woke up in a fighting pit and had to go one-on-one with some Asian biker-chick; From cops wanting to haul her in to pimps wanting to put her on a corner, and one curious mix up with the mob. Everytime she somehow had come out just barely ahead. She wasn't no whore on the street, she wasn't no snitch, and she wasn't no shitshow of a mother like hers. Nope, she was just a dishonest crook, making a living.

So, needless to say, not much got her scared easily.

Right now, she was absolutely terrified.

Oh, the green shit of a monster? That she could get over, with enough alcohol and a generous supply of weed.

Her mutilated associates? Never liked those assholes. What real friends she had, she either didn't try to bring into this part of the world or were already in it but just didn't work in her area of crime. No, no, her terror was the sense of utter violation she was feeling as she awoke.

And it being an entirely non-sexual violation didn't comfort her any.

Her awareness came back in a blur. She was some place strange. It didn't smell bad enough to be most places she would crash, but it was sterile-scented like a hospital. And there was an odd hum in the air. Like something with a lot of electricity running through it. Her eyes, or rather her right eye, strained to open. At first, all she could see was this purple-red mesh of everything. But as her vision cleared, her sense of direction and touch returned slowly.

She wasn't in a hospital bed, or any bed for that matter. She was hanging, her limbs bound and spread wide. Her first guess was some BDSM freak's lair. The colors did have that supposed romantic hues to them. That would probably mean a basement…which would make breaking out even harder. Not to mention the tubes in her left side. That at least meant this guy had medical knowledge and resources, right? Though, that just meant he would know what was the limit a body could take, how to fix her if he broke her…how to make her last longer.

Shit, surviving rarely sounded scarier than dying, but here she was.

As she anguished over the idea of being some asshole's plaything until a time if and when she could escape, her senses continued to clear. But that only muddled her ideas about where she might be.

This was all too high-tech. The walls were metal and smooth, and strangely curved. She looked to her right and saw she was spread eagle in some form of circle of machinery with big and sealed cuffs over her arms and legs.

High-tech. Was this Membrane's personal prison or something? Or where he did those rumored, less-ethical experiments? Was that where his monster-intern had come from?

She looked to her left and that was when the terror truly sunk in.

Her left arm was into a shackle or lock, it was held out at the wrist by two metal wires. The entire limb was...was...

She wasn't sure what, and that scared her. There was machinery, but it was too small and compact to be covering it. Was this- Had Her Arm Been Replaced!? Did she have a robot arm now?! That thought made her feel pale and nauseous as she followed the intricate work of the machine-arm, several tubes and wires appearing to be STABBED into it. And she could feel them. She could feel the inserts, in the metal! Following it up past her elbow, she nearly barfed and screamed as she realized that it went up to her shoulder, past it, and-

She couldn't open her left eye, and that side of her face felt heavy.

She screamed, she cursed, and she struggled like a gazelle in the maws of a lion. Abject horror consumed her as she tried to reject the reality of what she was seeing, what every sense was telling her more and more to be the truth.

"Will ya give it a rest?"

The external noise, the new voice in the room brought her back to sanity, mostly. She looked forward and saw that there was a metal table in front of her, a laboratory table of some kind. Sitting on the edge was a girl, not even a teen. She was purple haired with a blue shirt that had a white bunny skull on it. Something prickled in the back of her mind. She knew who this was, but couldn't summon the ability to place it together. But she was wearing some type of electric collar, so they were in the same boat, right? And so, with little other recourse, she resorted to her normal way of obtaining information.

"Who the flying fuck are you, brat?!" she asked in outraged confusion. "You know what, never mind. Just help me out so we can escape!"

"Escape?" Gaz repeated, looking at the mugger as if she was the perfect embodiment of stupid.

"Get me out of these fucking locks and I'll try and get that collar off! Good deal, right?" she tried, forcing a desperate smile.

"You mean this?" Gaz asked, casually taking the device off, smirking at the dumbfounded look.

It took half a minute for the synapses to re-fire, Malinda cursing as her glare took full forth. "Oh, you little bitch, you're not- whatever this asshole is using me for!?" She cursed, glaring at her limbs.

"You attacked one of Dad's scientists to try and steal from his labs. Did you have any idea of how badly that would end or are you a special kind of stupid?" Gaz questioned with a head tilt.

"Watch your mouth, you coc-Wait, Dad?" Malinda repeated as she took another good, long look at the girl before her. "Oh no. No, no, no. You're Membrane's brat," she realized in dread. "S-so, this really is his secret freak show lab."

"No, it's mine."

Malinda didn't know what happened. She had heard The Monster's voice, and then her whole world went black again. Her vision returned once more, the blur fading to see the girl was still sitting there.

As was The Monster, giving her an annoyed look with his blue eyes. "That's the third time we've had to revive you. Computer, what was her cause of death this time?" The Monster called out in demand.

Death? She died? What?

"An overload of fear, Sir," a lazy, synthesized voice answered. "Her heart is still weak after dying from shock the first time, not to mention all the medication we've pumped into her."

Who was that? Some kind of Robo-AI?

She died three times?


"Why DO you keep saving her?" Gaz asked curiously.

"Because, Gazling, I need answers. And a new test-pig is always welcome," The Monster said with a disturbing amount of joy and affection.

Very stupid instincts took over before her fears could catch up with her. "Screw you, I ain't nobodies tes-AHHHH!" she screamed as an unimaginable pain suddenly erupted from her left side before radiating all over. It then stopped just as suddenly, leaving her panting in a cold sweat.

"You lost the right to complain, Human, when you attempted to assail me," The Monster retorted, almost- no, definitely enjoying her agony, the little sadist.

"What did you do to her?" Gaz asked, her tone radiating curiosity without sympathy.

"It is more what Zim stopped doing to her," The Monster answered idly as he stepped towards her.

Then he stood up. And up, and up. Casually revealing his true legs and four arms once more, he reached behind her terrified head and grabbed-something. Something that was big and imbedded in her head.

What was it, what was it, what was-?!

"Malinda Ziki Dunn," The Monster addressed in a calm, almost soothing tone as his eyes conveyed a warning. "Comprehend this. What I am holding is a device inserted into your spinal cord, intercepting and blocking the sensation of pain in your body. What you just felt was ten percent of what you would feel it they were unblocked. Do you understand this?"

"Y-yeah, you turn it down or I pull it out, I'm screaming myself to death," Malinda answered as she forced herself not to make eye contact. She swallowed as she felt his gaze bore into her, summoning the courage to ask a question she had back in the alley. "What are you?"

The Monster released the pain-suppressor with a mysterious, coy look. "From this day forth, I am the one that determines the extent of your lifespan. So your repeated deaths are becoming increasing annoying to me, and detrimental to the prospect of you no longer requiring that device in your head."

With that, the Monster went down, appearing to be just a green human once more.

"But for now, I have other arrangements. Come Gazling, the Unicorns await."

Malinda shook in her bones as they left. With the absolute fear of The Monster fading, his words finally sunk in.

She thought she had seen Hell, had dodged it by threads on many occasions.

This was truly Hell now.

And she had tried to mug the Devil.


End Flashback

Gaz pushed the memory from earlier out of her mind. It haunted her for all the wrong reasons. Most girls her age- okay, humans of any age or sex, would be horrified by what that woman had and would go through in Zim's less than gentle care. He had amputated her, implanted alien technology into her and was running gods knew only what kind of tests and experiments on her. The agony, the suffering would have brought most humane individuals to tears, or vomit.

But not Gaz. She wasn't exactly sure what the scientific term was for whatever condition she felt, but her ability to feel sympathy was rather restrictive. She rarely truly felt more than pity for an unfortunate stranger. Seeing as this Malinda Dunn had gone after both Zim and her dad's lab? Yeah, her capacity to care what happened to her was essentially flushed down the toilet.

No, what had her fixation was that Zim had turned the mugger into a cyborg, which reminded her to a disturbing degree of her vision from her time in space. Was Zim going to turn her into a cyborg one day? Baring it becoming a necessity, she wasn't exactly thrilled with the prospect of trading in her blood for oil. Still, Zim had made no comment or notion of such intents, and he was rather open with her about all his intentions. Maybe she'd just bite the bullet and ask him, when Dib wasn't around.


Speaking of Big Head himself, she glanced over to see he had finally managed to mount and ride Kliplet.

"HA! Zim told you it did no harm to your male ego!" Zim declared in victory.

Dib ignored him though as Kliplet dashed and leapt about. Not enough to throw the human off as long as he was careful, but more than enough to have a grand ride around the field. "This is one of the best days of my life!" Dib declared happily.

Gaz scowled a bit before begrudgingly taking her Game Slave out once more.

Zim just chuckled as he let his archenemy savor his time with the creature. He was growing curious as to where the rest of the herd was. All this time here with Kliplet gave him a vague idea of how much magic energy a unicorn gave off, and how long the herd had been gone. They had been out here for well over an hour, but this field had been mostly empty since twice that long. Was Kliplet an outcast, for some reason? Primitive races did have strange, primordial senses of judgement at times.

"Hey, Zim?" Dib called as the unicorn slowed to take a breather. "You seem to be an expert on magicals and all that. What would happen if Klip bred with a normal horse?"

Said unicorn gained an annoyed look at that.

Zim hummed as he caught sight of something, ignoring as Kliplet tossed an alarmed Dib off his back. "Depends on what you refer to. There is a good chance that such breeding would merely cause Kliplet's energy to accelerate the process that is already occurring in all natives of this planet, thereby turning it into a magic horse of some variety. Or, possibly, create a psionic horse," Zim answered as he walked over to a patch of grass, crouching down to study some dried liquid on the plant blades, a tentacle from his pack scanning the substance. "If you are inquiring of Half-Breeds, I am uncertain. Some magical races breed true to only one parent in a mixed-parentage, others have a hybrid."

"Yeah, don't mind me, just thrown by a mythical horse with attitude problems," Dib muttered as he picked himself off the ground, dusting the grass and dirt from his clothes. Glancing back at his longtime foe, he grew curious and suspicious as he saw Zim studying something. "What, did you find something?"

"My Pak says it's Unicorn blood, but something is off. Like there is a mutation or extra enzyme," Zim answered automatically. He stood up, glancing at Kliplet, who appeared to be growing restless. "Dib-stink, is there any other kind of variety of unicorn?"

"If you mean horned horses, I'm sure there's a few, but the only other thing coming to mind is a bicorn," Dib answered with a shrug.

"And that would be?" Zim asked with a narrowed gaze, scanning the area. Something felt off about all this.

"Two horned horse. That one, I have no idea what is and isn't just made up about it these days," Dib admitted with a snort. "All I know is that is they're usually depicted as some kind of opposite of the unicorn, in terms of temperance."

Zim blinked slowly at that. "Dib-stink, you should probably leave," Zim stated, eyes darting around.

"Oh, why, so you can abduct the entire herd when they get back?" Dib asked with an eye roll. "Or inject them with some kind of mutating, mind-control cybernetics."

"Well, not them, no," Zim answered idly. "But Dib, you just said that this Bicorn, if it now exists, is the opposite of Kliplet."

"Yeah, so?" Dib asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Kliplet likes us," Zim reminded pointedly.

"What's your po-Oh, Shitake Mushrooms," Dib grumbled, wincing in understanding.

"I am unsure how fungi relate to this situation, but Zim agrees with the look upon your face," Zim stated in response.

"Just please tell me I'm not going to turn around and it's going to be there," Dib requested pleadingly.

Zim tilted his head to look behind the big headed boy. "Not unless Kliplet changes into one suddenly."

"Oh thank God," Dib said with a sigh of relief, searching his pocket to pull out his camera. He glanced around awkwardly. "Look, I know it's a bit weird, but...you want to get Gaz down here for a group picture with the unicorn?"

Zim raised an eyebrow at the request. "Please tell me you are not growing fond of me, Dib-stink."

"Not in the slightest," Dib answered flatly.

"Oh thank the Broodmother," Zim said with his own relieved sigh. "So why this sentimental documentation?"

Dib shrugged to himself, scratching his head as he did so. "I don't know. First big sign of magic taking over, just feels like a big moment to me. I figured it'll help keep me in perspective of how much changes, or something like that," Dib answered in a ramble.

Zim stared for a moment before looking towards the trees. "Gazling! Your sibling-unit is vacating the area after a group photo!"

"Grr, fine! But you keep that horned pair of boots under control!" Gaz called back as she slid down the trunk of the tree.

"I really hate when you make it seem like you've got my sister at your beck and call," Dib deadpanned.

Zim tilted his head at Dib with a confused look. "But I do?"

Dib's eye twitched as Gaz walked up, grabbing them both by an arm without stopping to pull them along. "Okay, I'm here, let's go get a photo with McStabby."

Said horse grew visibly annoyed at her approach, but did little more than snort after receiving a warning look from Zim. "Give Zim the camera," Zim requested as one of his pak-tentacles emerged and reached towards the human. Dib complied as they got in a line in front of the mystical equine, the mechanical limb pulling away to get proper distance to get them all in one shot.

One click later, and Zim's limb tossed it back to Dib unceremoniously. "Thanks," Dib said begrudgingly as he looked at the photo in question. He was grinning while throwing up a peace sign, just because he could. Zim's robotic limb was, unsurprising, almost entirely out of the shot. How he could have calculated the angle for that without seeing the perspective image, Dib had no idea. Speaking of Zim, he had his default expression: smug, confident, and calm for the moment.

Then there was Gaz; he had noticed she was a little tense when they were lining up, due to Kliplet not liking her. So he had very mixed feelings that, while not smiling, she was definitely more relaxed due to Zim standing close and patting her on the back while the picture was being taken. He would never understand what Gaz saw in Zim, and usually had the survival instincts to not try and ask.

He raised an eyebrow as he noticed the unicorn in the photo. Kliplet wasn't looking at them or the camera, but something off camera, and he didn't look happy about it.

"Yeah, Dib?" Gaz spoke up. "You might want to scram. Like, right now," she warned, getting his attention and pointing off to a nearby hill.

"Is that...?" he murmured, getting just a bit nervous as he took in the distant figure.

It was large and every inch of it was pure, bulging muscle. Its coat seemed too dark a shade of black to be natural, with oxen-like horns gleaming menacingly against the sunlight. But it was no oxen glaring down at them with hateful eyes.

"A dual-horned equine, yes," Zim answered flatly as Kliplet let out a snarling neigh at the imposing creature, which returned the roar in kind. "Monocorn, can you keep that one busy briefly?" Zim asked to the unicorn, the creature nodding back in reply.

That was all the warning they received before Kliplet bolted forward into a charge, the bicorn responding in kind to rush down the hill to meet the attack head on.

"Time to evacuate!" Zim declared as he grabbed Gaz and Dib, both making surprised remarks until he leapt with his full leg power.

"HHHHOOOLLLLYYYYYY SHHHHITTTTTT!" Dib screamed to Gaz's annoyance as they descended to the edge of the clearing, Zim kicking off a tree trunk they almost crashed into. "Warning! Just a little warning!" the human boy demanded.

Zim of course ignored him. "Gazling, accompany your sibling home," he instructed with complete seriousness.

"What are you going to do?" Gaz inquired with a raised eyebrow.

"I shall assist Kliplet in taking care of this foe," Zim answered without hesitation.

"You really like this unicorn, don't you?" Dib asked, half-teasing.

"He is a creature actively wanting to aid and protect me from a creature that appears to be desiring the opposite," Zim rationalized as it was completely obvious.

"Point," Dib conceded with a shrug as he headed into the woods. "Okay, let's go Gaz!"

"I'm staying," Gaz said bluntly, arms folded over her chest.

"Oh, come on!" Dib groaned, turning back as Zim gave Gaz a disapproving look.

"Gaz, as your master, I'm ordering you to leave the area," Zim retorted sternly.

"Yeah, Zim? Even if I acknowledged being your slave, despite you not conquering Earth yet, I'm pretty sure slaves are encouraged not to leave their masters in danger," Gaz countered.

"I still hate how calm you are about him calling you his slave," Dib stated with annoyance.

"Gaz-slave, do you truly believe this creature is a danger to Zim?" Zim pointed out with a scowl.

"Not until you tried sending me away, no," Gaz answered, cracking an eye open to give Zim a meaningful glare.

Zim held her gaze for a moment before he did the last thing Dib wanted him to do: the Irken smiled, clapping both hands on Gaz's shoulders. "Zim is not about to fall prey to some poor excuse of a Tisliomot, but you are another matter. I cannot be certain of your safety if you stay here, Gazling."

Dib looked away awkwardly, feeling very out of place and unsure of what to think of seeing Zim show what appeared to be honest and genuine concern for Gaz, a human.

"Can't you just give me the collar for the armor and weapons?" Gaz pointed out, looking unconvinced but a bit concerned now. Zim just chuckled, and it wasn't very reassuring.

"If my hypothesis is right, the collar's protections might not be as effective in this situation," he informed before grinning a bit, "I shall owe you a pizza later."

"Seriously, stop, you're making it sound like you're going to die even more," Gaz stated in defeat, before sighing, "Fine, Zim, I'll go while you save your precious unicorn."

"Zim appreciates that, Gazling," Zim stated with a grin, before taking a mighty leap back into the clearing.

"Stupid alien, making me feel bad for leaving him behind," Dib muttered as he headed to the forest again. "Gaz, hurry up!"

"I'm coming, idiot," Gaz stated without any real bite, despite her scowl.

She didn't like this, not one bit.

End of Chapter

Well, there we go, Zim and his unicorn are about to have a show down with a bicorn. Before you ask, Zim has a legitimate reason for not assuming the bicorn would like Gaz, hence why he had her leave. And we got a peak into the fate of Malinda Dunn, my OC- pity her or not, but its a nice little reminder that Zim, or irkens in general, aren't the most moral of individuals.

Hope to get back to this and the rest of my stories in the near future, Might end up typing them on this old touchpad I'm using in the mean time, depending on how antsy my writing instincts become. Anyway, again, I think I'm going to be fine now, and I hope you all enjoyed this.

PS Stay safe from the coronavirus!

go fund me . com (slash) f (slash) akumakami64
p a treon . com (slash) akumakami64