Zim the Warlord: Irken Reversion

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim or anything else here

NOTE: I apologize for the long delay, buuuuut I'm actually glad I waited. Enter the Florpus didn't just give me a drive to come back and flesh out this fic, but gave me some great plot points to capitalize on and hilarity I couldn't pass up. Enjoy and ALL HAIL ZIM!

Zim felt odd when he awoke. Both great and horrible in a bizarre twist. He felt very energized and alive right now, like he could take on the entire galaxy! At the same time, his limbs felt a bit sore and stiff, like he was still recovering from some great physical exertion. Yet he couldn't recall any such event. Not only that, but-

"Computer! Explain to me why I am naked!" Zim demanded, holding his arm weakly in the air with a finger pointed high in the sky.

He blinked as he realized two very, very important facts. One, his arm seemed a bit longer than it used to be. Second...he had two hands in the air. Both of them on his left.

"By the great Broodmother!" Zim exclaimed in surprise as he shot up, almost falling forward from the mixture of being lightheaded and his body just feeling...strange.

"Zim, Zim! Calm down!" The Computer called, a bit annoyed yet also concerned, "Your center of gravity has changed, you have to get used to it."

"Get used to what?" Zim asked, trying to keep one right arm down as the other gripped his head as his vision cleared.

He was still in the lab, on one of the tables. Irkens didn't need nice, cushy substances to sleep on, so Zim wasn't surprised he might have slept on one of his research tables. What did surprise him was that his legs were dangling off the end and resting on the floor. All around him was shredded scraps of skin, his own no doubt, along with some crust formed from bodily ooze that had long dried up. Gir was off to one side, smiling stupidly.

"What...what happened to me?" Zim asked in disbelief, looking down at his now four arms and long legs. The lower set were a bit shorter than the others, but they also had sharper claws.

"You went into a coma," the Computer answered, "Or rather a deep sleep since I'm not sure coma is the correct term when you rip your own clothes off in your sleep. After that, your...condition went into overdrive, changing your body at a rapid pace. I actually calculated you were very probable to die from some of those alterations."

Zim took a deep breath at that, "Activate a reflective hologram of myself!" Zim ordered out, not sure he wanted to know everything that had happened to him.

"Yes sir," the computer answered sardonically as the see-through image appeared in front of Zim.

Zim steeled himself as he took in the creature before him. It was still Irken, or some relation of one. He was taller, obviously, maybe even as tall as the Tallest. However, his legs had three sets of joints now, the middle ones facing backwards. His toes were a bit longer and much more talon-like, obviously designed for gripping. His head was the same, mostly. His eyes hadn't changed, but the antennas had notably more setae than before, giving them a hairy and thorny appearance. There was also an almost unnoticeable patchwork of crisscrossing ridges along his scalp.

Besides the new arms and size, the torso appeared to be the same to Zim, on the outside at least. Perhaps more muscular, but with his overall increase in mass, it was hard to tell. Though, upon looking down at his actual self, Zim noticed that the stomach area, if he were human, had a darker shade to it. He stroked it a bit and felt no pain, so he doubted it was internal bleeding.

He exposed his teeth and was pleased to see those were the same zipper style, as the Dib-beast once dubbed them. Then he noticed his tongue, however. It was the same long and fleshy muscle he had been using for over a century, but there was definitely something different about it. And one of the perks of a long tongue was being able to grab it and examine it if needed, specially with the hologram not being clear enough for his liking.

It took him a moment of squinting, but he finally figured it out. There was a small...thing on the underside, just before the very tip of it. After focusing on it a bit, Zim was shocked to find a tiny dart emerge from what was apparently a second mouth on his tongue.

Zim retracted his darted tongue as he looked down at the final noticeable alteration to his body.

If a human were to see it, they would call it the strangest and scariest penis they had ever seen.

They wouldn't be wrong either, as it was the Irken equivalent of a penis. It was about seven inches long, and nearly as thick as a adult human wrist. Large for human, but Zim expected average for his new body. It had a forest green color and a hard, scaly texture to it. The crown almost appeared to have tiny, dull, backwards spikes along it. It almost looked more like a predator worm than genitalia.

Zim, already guessing what this was, noted he had no visible gonads to go with it.

"Computer, I need answers and I need them now," Zim said flatly as he dismissed the hologram.

"Well, you're in luck. While you were catching your beauty sleep, I monitored the information streaming from your pak," Computer answered lazily, a smirk in its voice, "I can't begin to speculate what caused this, but I can tell you the most obvious side effects so far: Drastic height increase, second set of arms with sharper claws-"

"Yes, yes, I can see all of those! Explain to me things that are not plain as day! Like what is this spike in my tongue!" Zim demanded.

The computer made his vocalizer simulate a sigh, "Well, I was getting to that, but okay. The spike is actually designed to penetrate a life-form's skin and drink their blood dry for nutrients," The computer answered.

Zim gaped, "I drink blood?"

"Yes and no. Your squeedlyspooch has divided itself into several organs that carry out many functions. The organ that digests and processes your food makes you capable of consuming many things. What it's intended for exactly, I'm not sure. There also seems to be a smaller organ attached to it that is designed solely for sensing, storing, and purging any ingested poisons to the body. Your circulatory organ is also part of your respiratory system, feeding fresh air to it almost directly through the skin, making it difficult for you to become "out of breath" as the humans say. You also have an organ that seems to be responsible for most of your new hormones. Coincidentally, it is neighboring your internal testicles, and is connected to your nervous system. Unlike similar organs in most creature, apparently it releases very specific, very powerful chemicals depending on the stimuli and bodily reactions," The computer droned on.

"Wow," Zim said in shock, patting his torso, "Fair thee well, Squeedlyspooch! Ye served Zim well!"

"Zim," Computer said flatly.

"Yes, yes, continue please," Zim requested dismissively.

The machine groaned before complying, "Your upper hands still have the ability to sense taste through touch, but your lower ones do not. This might just be a matter of timing, or they might be designed like that, naturally or no," The computer started, "They also have a layer of microscopic "grippers" that should allow you to stick to surfaces, same with your feet, but I wouldn't recommend wall-climbing as these appear to be easily warn down or pulled out from constant use. Unless I'm misreading these signals, your toe claws also have an exceptional regrow time. Your antennas can hear and smell things clearer than before while your skull is now, literally, dense. Your legs, besides the shape, aren't that much different. On the upside, you can probably jump up to a one story ceiling without much issue. To top it all off, your pak has been constantly stimulating your brain, increasing its solo capacity to make it fully functioning," The computer stopped. If he needed breath, he would have been panting there.

Zim blinked as that sunk in, "You mean...I don't need my pak?" Zim asked slowly.

"Eventually? Yes. Congratulations on being the first not-brain-dead Irken in millions of years," The Computer answered bluntly.

Zim growled at that before something occurred to him, "Umm, Computer, I think you forgot something?" Zim reminded, pointing down to his phallus.

"That, Zim, is your version of a penis. Beyond that, I don't know yet. All I know it that what you're seeing is a protective shell or armor-like foreskin. While I'd rather not find out at all, I won't know anything until it's done maturing- it was one of the last organs to form," Computer elaborated with mild disgust.

"Another mystery to add to the pile," Zim mused absently as he awkwardly tried to stand on his new legs, two hands on the table for support, "By the Skool Food, why are these legs so complicated!?" Zim complained in irritation as he tried to get them to walk right.

"Hmm, they seem to be designed to walk in various settings, allowing one to adapt to a different dimensions of enclosed spaces," Computer commented in observation.

Zim paused as he put the thought together in his head. He slowly, shakily, bent his backwards knees and the set below that, folding them so compactly that they would have circulation issue in a more human-like system. But for the Irken's new body, the bending did little to impede the blood flow. Now he looked as if he had one knee on each leg and despite being folded like this, their thickness could pass for that of a human nearing adulthood.

"Hmm, tall enough to be a HiSkooler now," Zim mused absently, noting that problem no longer being relevant. Along the same line of thought, he folded his lower arms over his stomach. He hummed as he realized that with the right clothes, he could still pass for his usual "disguise," now with a growth spurt. He just had to make sure no one saw under his shirt and that he never wore shorts. That, or, find a way to conceal them better.

Zim blinked as his antenna twitched repeatedly, "I...is that smell Zim?" He asked slowly, scowling.

"Along with your shredded skin and dried body goo...and whatever bodily waste you're currently sitting in," The Computer informed dryly.

"...Zim smells disgusting," the Irken decided with a grimace. "Sanitation pod?"

"Parsecs ahead of you," the computer answered with a hint of smugness as an empty pod rose from the floor near Zim.

The invader scowled as he crouched into it, mindful not to undo his joints, "What is the nature of the discoloration on Zim's middle area?" Zim asked as the pod slid closed and began to fill with a liquid that would NOT burn his flesh like acid.

"Unknown as of yet. Maybe just a reaction to, your know, your organ literally ripping itself apart," The Computer pointed out sarcastically.

Zim rolled his eyes, an earth habit he admittedly loved as none could detect him doing such in his true form. The non-water liquid quickly drained away with the offending odor on Zim's body. "Computer? Take samples of my discarded bio-waste on the floor: scan it, study it, and incinerate the rest."

"Duly noted," the Computer acknowledged as robotic appendages sprang around the room to do Zim's bidding.

"How long was I incapacitated?" Zim questioned curiously.

"..." There was a heavy silence as the Computer hesitated to answer.

"Quignark," Zim cursed idly. "I'm assuming this Break of Springs is over."

"We both know you know how to say Spring Break properly," the Computer reminded in exasperation.

"I know, it is merely more fun to say it the Zim-way," Zim concluded with a wide grin. "So, how long, exactly?"

Computer ultimately let out a virtual sigh as he answered. "About six months."

"...I'm sorry, what?" Zim asked with a blink, reaching up to rub the side of his head. "Did Zim grow human listening holes and generate wax in them while he slept?"

"No, Zim, I'm serious. You've been out for about half a year," Computer restated firmly.

"...Floringok, I missed Summer Break too!?" Zim said in annoyance.

"Right, because that's your concern," Computer stated with an eye roll.

"Right, right. How's GIR, the Base, Minimoose, the Dib-stink, and GIR. In that order," Zim instructed as he took a deep breath.

"You said GIR twice," Computer pointed out.

"I am aware, the order still stands," Zim acknowledged knowingly.

"We told GIR you were taking a super nap. He's mostly been alternating between the Doom Song and the monkey show since then. The base is fine, no activity or issues in four months since the human known as Dib stopped coming around. Minimoose-"


Zim blinked as he saw the moose-like entity floating near him. "Aww, Minimoose, I'm sorry I worried you," he cooed with a grin as he hugged his creation with his upper right arm, getting more squeaks. "You've been down here this whole time? Okay, now YOU need time in the cleansing pod," Zim stated, tossing him into it casually before turning back to the computer. "Continue?"

"Right. The boy spent a week trying to get in, then I guess he just went off to find you elsewhere. He tried a few more times, but he's just been watching the house for five months now with the surveillance he set up," the Computer explained offhandedly.

"Upside to this entire debacle: Not knowing where I am or what I'm doing is driving the Fat-Head crazy. Of this, I am certain and satisfied," Zim decided with a content look before scowling. "GIR?"

"I literally just-"


"WAAAAAA!" GIR screamed happily as he shot down into the lab with his jet-boots, landing right in front of Zim. "Hi, Masta! You's got big!" Gir's voice exclaimed cheerfully at Zim's form. "Is nap time over? I made you a sausage cake! And I broke the milk."

"You were saying?" Zim asked smugly to the computer.

The AI let out a long suffering sigh. "I don't get maintained well enough for this..."

"And GIR, you know I can't eat meat from this disgusting Planet...or maybe I can? Tests for later," Zim rambled to himself a bit.

"It's Milk-Sausage!" GIR assured, getting a look from Zim.

"...I'm not going to question that. This is not the first conversation I'm having in months," Zim decided blandly.

"What do you call the last ten minutes?" Computer asked flatly.

"An update. Now...I think I need some new clothes."


Zim breathed deep as he took in free, outside oxygen for the first time in nearly two hundred earth days. About the same amount of time it took him to get to earth. He shuddered, remembering his first six months with GIR and the Doom Song.

Wiping that memory from his focus, he looked down at his new attire with a grin. He still had a pink shirt, but it was more of a shirt than a "dress" as Dib and others insinuated sometimes. On its front was a white symbol liken to the Irken symbol, but without the antennae. Over the shirt was a sleeveless black vest he left opened. His pants were the same, black was a good color he figured, but he added on some green shoes for the heck of it. His fake hair and contacts were in place, hiding his true nature from the idiot population of earth.

After a bit of stretching, he found himself leaning against the fence post and scrolling through a datapad; one he was happy to know resembled Earth devices enough to not draw attention. "Jeez, Red must be bored if he decided to give the go on Purple's straight-line campaign," he murmured as he skimmed through the data. "And the Dib-Dad's company has a rival? Did I know that? I think I'd remember I knowing that."

"Zi-!iiiiim?" A familiar voice called, starting accusingly, than trailing off in confusion.

"Hm?" Zim looked up in confusion as he looked up to see a...Chairbound Blob-Human? "Can Zim help you, Disgusting Grease Goblin?" Zim asked in a casual, almost innocent way that only he could manage.

The possibly inhuman thing looked almost hurt by that, but still glared. "I-I'm Dib."

"...Eh?" Zim said, not quite comprehending that statement as he studied this creature. It was too fat, disgusting, and- his antennae shivered- smelly to be the Dib-beast, surely! But it did have the outfit, the voice, the stupid yet messier hair-thing, and the incredibly giant head- "Oh my Irk! Dib-Stink! Zim hardly recognized you, your putrid globious body is almost making your head look normal in size! What has happened to yoooou!?" he exclaimed in genuine shock, jumping back...landing on top of his roof.

"...How did he...?" Dib asked quietly to himself, having not seen any jet pack or robot limbs assisting the alien.

"What happened? Was it parasites? Mutations? Are you Ill? Cause Zim is not ruining this body like that, and our pact against biological bacterial warfare still stands! Break it and Zim will call in that favor with my future Gaz-pet!"

"Six months gone and you're still on about that?!" Dib exclaims in exasperation, trying and failing to pull himself out of his seat. "What have you been doing, Zim!? Where have you been?!"

"In the toilet!" Zim called with a straight face.

"...For six months?" Dib questioned slowly, not sure if he believed that.

"Yes," Zim answered, standing on the ledge with his arms crossed.

"...Oh, right, your lab is down the toilet," Dib recalled in exasperation.

"You're learning, Dib-blob!" Zim declared as he leapt down from his house, landing with a thud. There was something satisfying about feeling the kinetic energy running though his legs when he did. Standing at his disguised height, he hummed and deduced he was about a head above Dib now. Well, the old-Dib, not this...puke-monster. "But answer Zim now: What has become of you?" Zim demanded, waving to all of this old enemy.

"I've been monitoring all the places you're usually at: Here, Skool, that Taco-place you love!" Dib exclaimed as he regained his glare.

"No, no, Gir loves that place. I think it's dirty," Zim corrected casually, motioning to the green dog standing next to them, surprising Dib with his sudden appearance.

"I ate a baby there," Gir stated cheerfully.

"He did," Zim confirmed as if it wasn't important.

"And just what have you been plotting and planning?! What dastardly scheme do you have for Earth that took half a year!?" Dib demanded obsessively.

"...Okay, Dib-stink- and by the Broodmother if that name isn't literal now- I'm going to even with you," Zim stated awkwardly.

"...You mean level?" Dib questioned in confusion.

"Yeah, sure," Zim waved off uncaringly. "The Great and Powerful Ziiiiim has been in a state of prolonged unconsciousness, resulting in a persistent state of vegativeness, to the point where Zim believes he has come to know the taste of oblivion and finds it wanting," Zim explained in a cocky, faux-casual tone.

"...You were in a COMA?! For SIX MONTHS?!" Dib exclaimed in shock, trying to leap from his chair...only to fall over, still stuck to the wheeled furniture. "I wasted all this time for nothing?!"

"That would be the Dib-way of saying it, yes," Zim accepted with a smirk...which quickly dissolved into an uncertain, uncomfortable scowl as he watched Dib squirm on the ground and try to get up. "Zim should feel great joy at the sight of you squirming like a worm-baby, LITERALLY, but this somehow just feels unfulfilling," he commented, looking around to see a few of the neighbors staring at them. "Pay your feeble minds no heed, neighboring humans! The boy-chair is just jealous of Zim's unglobby form," he declared dismissively. They all murmured in what sounded like understanding before heading off.

"Oh please, I'm sure this was all part of your plan," Dib grumbled as he tried to push himself up.

"I'd be thrilled to take credit for your demise in most scenarios, but this is not one of them," Zim stated blandly with a grimace, grasping the back of the chair as he sat Dib up with less effort than he expected.

"You're helping me?" Dib asked in mild surprise.

"Don't misunderstand, Dib-beast. I merely wish to remove your currently-more-revolting-than-normal self from my home," Zim stated simply as he walked in front of Dib, growling as he tried to shake some invisible filth off his hands.

"And how are you going to do that, huh?!" Dib demanded defiantly. Zim just looked at him, completely unimpressed as he simply raised a foot to angle it at Dib's chair, who just remembered that Zim had jumped to a building top a moment ago. "Oh, right," he realized in resignation as Zim kicked him as hard as his new legs would allow, sending the son of a scientist zooming down the street in his wheeled chair, as if shot out of a canon. "ZIIIIIIIM!" Dib yelled in anger and fear, unable to control his path.

"That boy'sa goin be a waffle driving like that," Gir commented in observation.

"Nah, he'll be fine," Zim concluded dismissively as he flexed his leg with a grin. "Zim was always great, but this is a pleasant improvement."

"Masta bigger and armier! Hehe, like a poodle~" Gir sang off randomly, dancing on his squeaky feet.

"Yes, yes I am," Zim agreed, putting a note away to look up what kind of dog a poodle was again. "Well, I'm off for a walk. Gir, watch the base and NO rave parties," Zim warned with a glare.

"Okey-dokey!" Gir saluted before running back inside.

"...One of these days, I'm going to find a way to upgrade that adorable junkbucket without removing his personality," Zim murmured to himself, shaking his head fondly as he decided to take a walk around town. He doubted much had changed in six months, barely anything had changed since he arrived on this dirthole of a planet. A new microshop here, some kind of weird goat-themed gym there, nothing truly important to him at the moment.

It took only a brief time until his antennae shuddered beneath his hair as he detected a putrid smell. He scowled as he rounded a corner and saw Dib scooting his chair up the path to the Membrane household. And at his current pace, it'd be a few minutes still. "...In for a Voot, in for a Massive," Zim decided with a shrug as used his legs to launch himself across the street, using his robotic spider legs and tentacles to land safely and silently in a tree, his pak's limbs bringing him down to the ground before retracting. Without further ado. he walked to the back door and knocked on it firmly.

He was actually surprised to see the patriarch of the family. Though, similar yet dissimilar to the Dib, the Professor seemed to have gained an non-disgusting but notable amount of weight. "Ahh, Dib's Foreign Friend! I thought you moved away?" he greeted in polite interest before looking around. "And why are you in the backyard, may I ask?"

"Professor? I thought you were always at your lab?" Zim asked in slight surprise. Maybe things had changed while he was gone. "Sorry, I've been away on...personal issues, of a very personally issuing nature. Also your male-spawn is currently rolling up to your door, and I desire to avoid his alien ravings again today," Zim explained calmly, thinking on his feet.

The smartest human on earth sighed in apology. "Please forgive my insane son. Though, that doesn't answer why you're here?" he asked curiously.

"Well, I thought I'd come by and check on the little Gazling's status after all this time," Zim answered honestly, if for no other reason than to verify if she had fallen victim to...whatever word humans used for Dib's condition.

"How thoughtful! Come right in, Gaz should be finished cleaning her Gazmat suit," Professor Membrane invited, happy to know his children had a friend.

Zim did so, blinking as his auditory glands detected an odd mechanical noise very close to him. Glancing over at the professor, he blinked as he processed a sudden revelation. "Gaz-Father, did you...always have robot arms?" he questioned in honest surprise.

"Hm?" Membrane paused after closing the door before he understood. "Ahh, that's right, you left before I switched to these new test models," he explained without hesitation as he pulled his right glove off to reveal the large mechanical prosthetic. "My old ones almost looked like natural arms, so I understand the confusion," he explained cheerfully.

"Given that you are a being of science, do they not hinder you a bit in the more...delicate tasks, or do you have minions to take care of those?" Zim asked curiously as he stroked his chin.

"Ahaha! I hardly trust the interns with coffee sometimes. No, I use to switch back in those cases, but we've worked out the kinks. These can now perform even the most delicate and precise operations, and many other improvements and features." Membrane stated proudly before opening his coat to reveal many metal rectangles on internal pockets, and the fact that he was still about the same size as Zim recalled. "Only draw back? Horrid battery life. Each arm goes through at least four a day, sometimes more," he lamented.

"Did you try adding a power-saving drive to compensate for the different energy input in tasks? Because if I'm right, your arms are burning extra energy just switching between the strength they're exerting for different tasks," Zim pointed out casually, scrunching his brow as he studied it. "Also, am I looking at this right, or is there a death-beam function on your arms?"

"Hm?!" Membrane did a double take at the green boy. "Remarkable. How can you tell about the energy weapon?" Membrane asked curiously, proud to meet another person of science.

"Little things. That spherical portion for the palms is out of place given the general design of the arm, and the way the top part is attached rather than being a whole piece suggests it more than just a synthetic arm. Wait, that's the problem, right? The energy weapon drains the battery even when shut down?" Zim guessed in understanding.

"My, you are a very intelligent young man. And yes, that is the issue. Are you interested in robotics?" Professor Membrane questioned in interest.

"Oh, I've dabbled in a few things," Zim answered with feigned humbleness. "Now about th-"


Both males turned to see Gaz looking at the altered Irken in shock, who was doing the same to a lesser degree. "Oh, how rude of me. I almost forgot why you came here. I'll leave you two to catch up," the Membrane patriarch said with a chuckle before walking by his daughter and making himself scarce.

"...Zim, wh-" Gaz started, only to blink in total disbelief as she felt Zim hugging her. "...What the heck, Zim...?" she asked, trying and failing to pull away from the now-taller male.

"Zim is just sooooo happy that my trophy-human has not transformed into a disgust blob-beast like the Dib. Bleh!" Zim explained, Gaz a bit taken and a bit uncomfortable by how genuinely happy he sounded.

"...Let me go now," Gaz ordered after a moment.

"Very well, I am done!" Zim answered as he released her suddenly, nearly make her fall. "Also, Gazling, since when do you wear blue? Or bunnies?" Zim asked in legitimate surprise.

"..." Gaz stared a moment longer before gained her composure and chuckling. "Since wearing all black started attracting unwanted attention. Idiots thought I was goth or emo and suddenly every edgy kid in school wants to annoy me. And it's a bunny skull," she pointed out with a small glare.

"A bunny skull is still a bunny," Zim countered in amusement.

"What about you? Mimicking Dib now?" she taunted lightly, pointing to his vest.

"Hmm? Oh, no, I just wanted someplace to put my hands. And your brother does not own this color," Zim answered with a shrug. "Speaking of your now-truly-disgusting gene-sharer...what happened while I was out of commission?" he asked curiously, possibly even in concern.

"He did nothing but sit in his room and watch for you," Gaz answered flatly.

"...For six months? Truly nothing else?" Zim asked in disbelief. The Dib-stink truly wasted all of that time? He'd count that as a victory. Or Dib defeating himself, either or.

"Well, what were YOU doing all this time?" Gaz challenged, raising an eyebrow at him.

"In a coma, basically," Zim answered with a shrug.

Gaz blinked, looking Zim over against before biting back a snicker. "Dib does nothing and turns into a slime-ball of flesh and sick, you do nothing and come back looking like you went through a growth spurt," Gaz realized in amusement.

"Superior Irken Biology, Gaz-Baby!" Zim stated proudly with his hands on his hip. Gaz stopped snickering before looking at Zim with wide eyes, wondering if he knew the double meaning of that nickname. "But, in total honesty this once, I have no idea how or why this happened. I mean, look at this!" Zim said, pulled up his shirt to reveal the second set of arms, folded tight against his chest. Gaz stared in idle fascination before he pulled it back down. "Even for Irkens, that's not normal."

"Huh, so what, you a super Irken now or something?" Gaz asked, partially in jest.

"Zim has been "super" since he left the tube, thank you, Gazling," Zim corrected with a mock glare. "But as there appear to be no health hazards, I believe I will be fine."

"That still raises the question: Why are you really here, Zim? Dib went off to see you, so I doubt you're here for him," Gaz questioned with her arms crossed.

"I just thought I'd give you a heads up," Zim answered with a coy smirk.

"...About what?" Gaz asked suspiciously.

She froze as she suddenly found Zim leaning over her with his hand on the wall. "I'm taking your advice."

"...What?" she asked slowly, trying to decipher the meaning.

"I'm going to stop talking about what I'm going to do and just do it," Zim explained in a voice that could be either soothing or sinister, or both. "So, as my favorite human, I wanted to let you know to enjoy the time this dirtball has left before I take it, and claim my Gaz-slave," he answered, patting her on the head. "Oh, and sorry you have to put up with a Grease Goblin, bye!"

Gaz gaped as Zim left without another word, leaving her just a tad stunned. A year ago, she'd have brushed him off as an idiot. Six months ago, she knew it was possible but wasn't betting on soon. Now? Something in Zim's eye just screamed something to her, like the idoit was long gone, that he was truly a threat now. And an imminent one.

"Gaz! Can you help me? I can't open the door without tipping over!" Dib's voice called. breaking her out of her shock.

She shook her head, scowling briefly before putting on a small smirk. "Go get them, Zim," she said to herself as she debated between helping and ignoring her brother.

End of Chapter

Ello! Here is the long awaited Chapter 2. Sorry about the long wait. Besides my attention being else where, its been a rough couple of years, including my grandma(who raised me) being in the hospital at the start of this year for pneumonia, flu, and other things hitting her all at once. She's doing great now, btw.

Anyway, as for this fix, I decided to incorperate part of Enter the Florpus into this, both for plot points in the movie and as a chance for me to ddo some inverse explaining of changes- Membrane's arms, Gaz's outfit, etc.

Zim's coma was originally just going to last until the end of the spring break, buuut...well, I looked up when the real-life Peace Day was, and realized it was about six months after Spring break. Given his transformation, that seemed like a good timeframe. That said, this is more Series/Classic Gaz than Comic/Movie Gaz, and vice cersa for the Professor.

And oh boy, Zim is digging his new, Reverted form. Is this the end result of Zim's transformatino or is this not even his final form? We'll find out eventually. And he's already given a warning to Gaz, who is wondering just how much of his word choices are deliberate now, and is all to interested to see how Zim will follow through on his intentions.

Anyway, hope this was worth the long ass wait. I shall be returning here more frequently, I promise.

PS After everythat happened with my Grandma, I set up a pat-reon under the same username as mine here(Akumakami64) for anyone willing to tip me. Let me be clear, I'm not using this to make money off fanfic, I'm using fanfic to advertise that I have one. If you don't want or can't tip me, its fine, I'm not ransoming my updates or anything. If you do, you get access to preview-chunks of upcoming chapters and potential fics, along with any original content I push out. So if you can, thank you. If you can't, again, hope you enjoyed the show!