We Pretend it's Alright
We Pretend it's Alright
Padme started when she heard the quiet voice behind her. She had been so absorbed in the news on the holo, she hadn't noticed anyone come in. But she recognized his voice immediately and a simile broke over her face. It had been over a week since she has heard that voice. The young senator promptly stood up and turned to see the tired, tear stained face of Anakin Skywalker staring past her at the wall through lifeless eyes.
What had happened? Padme stood in shock for a few second, taking in Anakin's numb expression. His eyes were what was frightened her. His normally blue eyes were speckled with yellow and they started in nothingness, gazed over and glassy. Something about this was familiar, she had once before seen him like this. Then it hit her.
During their trip to Tattooine three years ago, Padme had sat up hours waiting for Anakin to return the night he went after his mother. Sitting at the kitchen table in the home of the Lars family, she had stared at the table all evening, trying to fight off the feeling that she would never see Anakin again. All night she waited.
Sometime in the early morning, she had heard a noise from outside and quickly went out to investigate. He had walked past her, his mother's body in his arms, with the same dead look in his eyes, almost as if he wasn't seeing what was happening around him.
She had later talked to him in a workroom. After telling her what he had done in a monotone, he had gone into the same trance and wouldn't respond, seeming to not notice her attempts her draw him out of it. Unable to break the trance, she had just simply placed her hand on his and sat in silence next to him for a while. Eventually, he snapped out of it and broke down, crying in her embrace. Never before had she felt anyone so vulnerable and broken and it had affected her in a way she didn't know was possible.
Seeing that look in his eyes again meant something of that caliber must have happened again
"Anakin?" Padme asked cautiously, taking a step closer him, examining his face carefully. "Ani, can you hear me?"
Anakin made no response and continued to stare past her. She took another step closer, her long, light-pink nightgown trailing behind her. A few steps closer and he finally seemed to realize she was there.
"It's my fault, Padme." Anakin murmured, still in some kind of a daze. He was looking past her again and didn't seem completely aware of where he was or what he was doing. "It's my fault, I fell for it."
Padme was now standing in front of him and cupped his face with her small, supple hands, guiding his face down to look at hers. Anakin looked down at her, but didn't seem to really see her. "I shouldn't have gone back." He whispered, terror in his wispy voice as his body started to tremble.
"What happened to you Anakin?" She murmured more to herself than him, caressing his blank face. Anakin did not show any confirmation that he could hear or feel anything but continued to stare at her with that same look of horror and fear.
"I messed up Padme. I-I-I... I didn't know what to do, I couldn't let him..." Anakin trailed off, an anguished expression replacing the horrified one, and his eyes still scared. His body trembled violently now, his hands especially. Padme grabbed them and tried to hold them still in her own, but he pushed her away roughly, and she staggered back, shocked at what had happened.
Anakin began pacing back and forth, a cruel look on his face and his eyes seeming to grow more yellow once more. "It wasn't supposed to be like this!" He roared, wringing his hands and his pace quickened. "I wasn't supposed to do this!" He continued yelling to himself as Padme watched him become more and more hysterical. "I was trying to save you!" He screamed, rounding on her and staring down at her. "He lied to me, they all lied to me!" Anakin continued to shake for a minute, his face growing more and more infuriated. Suddenly, the anger died from his face and he collapsed to his knees, head in his hands as tears streamed down his face.
Padme moved towards Anakin cautiously. When he made no response, she knelt in front of him, wrapping her arms around him and resting her head atop his. They sat like this for a while, Padme holding Anakin as he cried, all the stress of the night pouring out of him.
Finally the tears stop, and Padme retracted her arms as Anakin raised his head. His eyes were bloodshot, but once again their normal sparkling blue. His expression was still one of pain, but he seemed much more stable than before.
"What happened to you, Anakin?" Padme murmured, her face still only inches from his.
Anakin closed his eyes as images from the last hour flooded back to him. He slowly stood up and gently pulled Padme up as well, carful of her very pregnant stomach. He turned away, clenching his eyes shut as he ran a rough hand through his tangled hair.
Had it all really happened? He felt as if he was dreaming… he must be. There was no way what had happened in the Chancellor's office was real. It must have been an illusion, a result of his lack of sleep. But it was all so clear and he knew it had happened. The events began to reply in his head slowly and painfully. Mace Windu falling out the window, Palpatine's shrieks of "You need me to save her! She will die and it will be your fault! YOUR FAULT!"
The memories were too fresh, too painful. He was still struggling to comprehend and come to terms with it himself, how could he explain it to someone else right now?
Padme stared at the back of Anakin's tall form perplexed, not even knowing what to say. What could she say? She had no clue where he had been, or what had happened, but it was clearly something traumatic. But when Anakin started to shuffle slowly towards the door, and she called out, "Anakin Skywalker, don't you dare take another step."
Her words rang clearly across the room and Anakin halted in his steps, her words resonating in his ears. What was he thinking, walking away? He should know by now that's not how their relationship worked. Communication is key. That was the message Padme had drilled this into his head over and over again.
He made a choice. He would not run away from his problems right now, as much as he wanted to. He would not shut himself away as he had before. Padme deserved better than that, he deserved better than that. They were past that. Together, they would get through this and come out stronger he knew, but first he had to turn around.
Padme couldn't honestly say she had any clue what was going through her husband's head, but she certainly hoped it involved talking to her, for communication is key and without communication there cannot be improvement. After a minute, Anakin turned around and walked back over to her, his tired gaze finding hers
"We are going to get through this, okay?" Padme murmured, placing her hands on his shoulder. He looked at her, his eyes wet, but clear now. He still wanted to disappear, to never have to relive or try to explain the past hour of his life to anyone, not even Padme. But after all he had put her through, she deserved explanations more than anyone, painful as it would be for him.
The Jedi held out his hand out to Padme, who wrapped her arm around his torso, keeping his body close hers.
"Shall we go to kitchen?" Padme suggested softly and Anakin nodded, putting his arm around her shoulder and letting her lead them out of the sitting room, a slight aura of anticipation surrounding them. Padme knew something major must have happened to cause this break down. A part of her wondered if this had something to do with their relationship. Could the Jedi of found out about them, or about the pregnancy. Had they expelled him from the order?
"Anakin," She started hesitantly as they walked, glancing back at his downcast face. He didn't reply, but continued to stare at the ground, long hair covering his face from her view. She decided to wait until they had entered the kitchen and had sat down in the breakfast nook.
"Ani," Padme tried again, squeezing his hand gently."What happened to you Ani?" She brushed his dirty blond hair behind his ear, off his face and gently guided him to sit upright. She left her other hand on his and took in his expression. "What's your fault?"
"Everything." Anakin needed to shut himself off, it was all surfacing again. Too many feelings and recollections washing over him. The bodies lying on the floor when he entered, their blood pooling on the cold stone. The sight of Mace Windu falling through the window was on repeat in his mind, and that feeling… that overpowering feeling of power and loss of self that terrified him. He needed it to stop. But instead he would have to control it, for communication was key, and now it was time to communicate, like a normal being did.
"I think you're going to have to elaborate honey." Padme said softly, giving him a little squeeze.
He still did not respond, staring down at the ground. Padme added, "I want to help you Anakin, but I don't know how if you don't talk to me. Help me understand so I can help you."
"I know, I just don't know how to start." He murmured, finally looking up at the woman next to him. "So much has happened and I feel responsible."
Padme didn't know what else to say and could do nothing but hold tightly to her husband. She had no idea where Anakin had been for the past few hours or what had happened to him. He wasn't acting at all like himself and she didn't know how to break through to him.
"I hurt people Padme. Everyone around me gets hurt. It's my fault. Ahsoka, my mother, you. Whenever I'm involved, everything always seems to go wrong." Anakin clenched his eyes shut for a minute before pulling away from her. "Everything is my fault." Tears pricked his eyes again as he stood up and walked over to the small window above the sink, staring out towards the brightly light senate building, flashing lights surrounding the top floor where he knew the bodies of one Sith lord and three Jedi masters were being discovered. Sighing he closed his eyes and shut the curtains with a flick of his wrist. He turned back to face Padme, shame in the eyes that meet hers, and took a deep breath before continuing. "I'm scared that I'm not in control, and of what could happen if that's true."
Padme stared in shock at him, confusion, frustration, and fear all bubbling up inside her. "What happened Anakin?" She asked again.
When no reply came, her patience wore thin. She stood up and stormed over to the silent man, making made fierce eye contact. After a few seconds of staring intensely into each other's eyes, Anakin broke down and fell to his knees again, all the pent up fear, remorse, and self hatred overcoming him.
"It's all my fault." He uttered, tears streaming out of his clenched shut eyes. "I fell for it, I wasn't strong enough to stop him. He promised to save you, but I was the one who was going to hurt you, I can see it now! I was blinded by fear and anger at the Order and I hurt you, and now they are dead because I can't control my emotions, and I just can't DO IT ANYMORE!" His voice had gotten progressively louder as he spoke and was yelling by the time he finished. It was all just too much to bear.
Padme was frozen in place, standing over the crumpled form of the young Jedi. This wasn't about their relationship but what he said scared her more. Shaking herself slightly, she knelt down beside him and cupped his face with her hands, tears pooling up against them. "Anakin, what do you mean? What did you fall for? Who's dead?"
"The Chancellor and Masters Kit Fisto, Agen Kolar, Saesee Tiin, and maybe Mace Windu."
She stared at him in shock at the news she had just heard. What the hell was Anakin going on about? "You need to explain what has happened. I need to know, okay?" She squeezed his shoulder reassuringly and slowly stood up. She helped him stand up as well and they walked back over to the table in silence. After Anakin had sat down in the booth, Padme walked over to the sink, deciding to make a pot of caf, knowing this was going to be a long night.
They waited in silence for the pot to brew, and once it was complete, Padme filled two mugs, taking hers black and adding milk and sugar to Anakin's, the way he liked it. She walked back over to the nook and handed the Jedi his, sitting down next to him.
"Thanks." He murmured, staring into the mug. "I'm going to try and explain everything." He added, taking a sip, letting out a deep sigh. Padme wrapped her arm around his, holding his hand and waiting for him to begin speaking.
Padme could see he was relaxing and felt it best not to push too hard, as he was obviously very emotionally unstable at the moment. But that didn't stop the burning curiosity inside her, and she was eager to hear his story.
"Well, I, erm, I guess I should start at the beginning, yes?" He looked to her for approval, and when she nodded and he continued, his voice hoarse. "Right, well for a few months, ever since you told me you were pregnant, I've been having these nightmares, like the ones I used to have about my mother before she died. It's always the same too. You're giving birth, but something is wrong and you… you don't make it. Until tonight I've been convinced that you are going to die in childbirth. "
Padme sat up, and turned to look at him, shock in her eyes. "You had more after that first dream? I thought we agreed you would tell me?"
Anakin looked down at the table, ashamed. "I know, I'm sorry. I just didn't want to scare you."
Padme gave him a sad smile and ran her hand through his long hair. "Don't hesitate to tell me if this happens again? We can't hide stuff like this from each other, okay?"
"I promise." Anakin squeezed her hand gently, looking into her hazel eyes and giving a slight smile in return. "After I started having these dreams, Palpatine and I grew closer and he started to tell me of an old Sith story of one who could stop death. I became obsessed with the idea, and researched day and night, but there was nothing about it in the Jedi archives. "
"That's why you've been missing a lot lately." Padme realized, thinking sadly of all the time together they had missed because of this.
Anakin hung his head. "I'm sorry I've been so absent. I was so sure I had to find a way to save you until tonight."
"What changed tonight?"
"I went to the chancellor's office, and he revealed to me that he was the Sith Lord, Darth Sidious, the Jedi have been searching for. He told me I would become his apprentice. He knew about us too, and my dreams. He told me only he knew how save you, and he would teach me how if I was his apprentice. But I refused, and I left to tell the council about him. I didn't want to turn to dark side, I couldn't."
He looked up to see Padme staring at him with worried eyes.
"Oh Ani." She whispered, and she squeezed his hand.
Anakin continued, needing to finish before it became too much again.
"Four masters went after him, including Master Windu. I wanted to go too, but Windu told me to stay behind. I tried to wait, but after twenty minutes, I couldn't take it anymore. I flew up to the Chancellor's chambers and I arrived to find Master's Kit Fisto, Agen Kolar, and Saesee Tiin all dead, and Palpatine backed into a corner against a large window by Master Windu. " His voice was full of pain, but he didn't stop.
"They both demanded that I help them. Windu told me Palpatine was too dangerous to be kept alive, but I needed him and I told him that. Palpatine told me to think of you and that I needed him to save you, or that you would die painful death, full of suffering that I caused. I didn't know what to do." Now he looked up and a smile was playing on his tear stained face.
"But then I thought of you, and what you would do if turned to the Dark side. It would hurt you so much, and I couldn't hurt you like that. I realize now that maybe that's what the dreams were warning me of. "
"I told Windu I was with him, but in the moment he looked at me, away from Sidious, Sidious hit him with force lightning and he fell through the shattered window." Anakin closed his eyes for a minute, feeling a pang of guilt and sorrow as he saw Windu falling again. Gathering himself, he continued.
"Sidious flew at me and we dueled for a while. We were pretty evenly matched, but the whole time he was screaming about how I was killing you by not joining him and how I was destroying the balance of the force. Finally, I don't really know what happened, but I yelled 'enough', and he was thrown back against the concrete wall, and... and," He hesitated, not know quite what to say.
"I'm not really sure, but I think he died on impact. There was a lot of blood his neck was bent in the wrong direction..." Anakin shrugged, again purposely not looking at Padme. He really didn't want to know what she must think of him by now.
"The force reacted to me and threw him. I felt something inside of me and it was overwhelming. It was a feeling I've never felt before. I left after that, I couldn't stand to be in there one more second. I don't know what happened to Windu..." He broke off again, not sure what to say anymore and Padme squeezed his hand comfortingly
"I just… I've just never gone that dark before. I was so close to turning to the dark side, I could feel it Padme, I was so close. That feeling I had when I connected with the force, I don't know if that was my anger at Sidious or something else." He couldn't bear to meet her gaze, he was ashamed and scared of what he had almost become. Of what he had been capable of becoming.
"What if I'm not able to beat it next time?" Anakin whispered, "What if I hurt you, or the baby?" He looked down worriedly at her large stomach, some part of him wondering what would become of this child now.
Padme didn't respond, but took his hand and placed it on her stomach. Little kicks thumped against Anakin's large hand. Emotion flooded through him. What if he hurt this precious little life?
"I trust you Anakin." She said firmly, her other hand directing his face back to hers, staring into his watery eyes. "I trust you with my life. You are my life. " They both smiled, remembering a time when Anakin had said something very similar to her a few years ago. " I trust you with our children's lives too, more than I do anyone else." Anakin's worries dissipated somewhat and he nodded.
"Okay." He smiled, and looked at her stomach again. It was quite big he mused, even for seven and half months. But hey, what did he know? He was a Jedi, not a doctor. It's not like he was around many pregnant people after all. Then something dawned on him.
"Did you say children?" Anakin asked curiously, looking confusedly at Padme, whose smile widened, and she giggled.
"I was waiting to tell you till I saw you in person." She started, giggling at Anakin's raised eyebrow.
"We are going to have to think of two names now." She hinted, wondering if he would figure it out, but he still stared at her, no clue what was going on. "For someone who acts so smart, you sure are stupid Anakin." She snorted, rolling her eyes, a smile still on her lips.
"I am honestly so confused." Anakin admitted, smiling puzzled at his giggling wife.
"Twins, Anakin." Padme said flat out. "We are going to have twins."
Anakin's mouth fell open, and he stared wide eyed, looking back and forth between Padme and her pregnant belly, Padme laughing at his reaction.
"Are you joking?" He said hoarsely, placing his other hand on her stomach, and gazing at in wonder.
"I'm serious Ani." She giggled, placing her hands over his, and meeting his gaze. "We are having twins!"
Anakin's smile widened, and for the first time in a long time, he felt pure joy surging through him, the circumstances of their lives temporarily forgotten. None of it mattered in this moment.
"I love you so much Padme." He breathed, caressing her face. "I don't think I could survive without you."
"Me neither Ani." Padme beamed, leaning in and passionately kissing her husband.
Separating a few seconds later, Anakin stood up, and despite Padme's insistence that she was too heavy, easily scooped her up in his arms, carrying her bridal style into the living room, sitting down with her on his lap and resuming the kiss. They became lost in each other, happy to be in each other's company, uninterrupted. No one brought up the matter at hand, as it meant that they would have to return to the real world, and who knew what trials and tribulations that would entail. The soon-to-be-parents needed a little time to breathe before that.
The front door is suddenly thrown open, and Senator Bail Organa walked in talking loudly. "Padme! I've been trying to reach you an hour! You weren't answering your- oh." He broke off as he noticed the couple on the couch, and all three froze, staring at each other in shock.
Anakin was the first to move, gently lifting Padme off his lap, and onto the couch, before standing up, and helping Padme to her feet as well.
"Hi Bail." Padme said awkwardly. "And sorry about my comm, it's been off…" She trailed off, not really sure what to say.
"Oh, of course." He nodded to Anakin. "Master Skywalker."
Anakin grimaced at the use of the title "master". That was something he would never agree with, nor earn. "Senator. And I'm a Jedi Knight actually."
Bail nodded again, trying to conceal his curiosity. "My mistake."
Anakin forced a smile, "It's fine." He turned to Padme, taking her hands in his and saying, "I must leave. I have some… things to take care of."
Padme nodded sadly and tears pricked her eyes. She didn't know when she would next see him and that thought scared her.
"Hey now," Anakin pulled her into an embrace, wiping away her tears, and whispering in her ear, "I'll see you tomorrow, I promise my angel." Padme squeezed him tight, and then let go, nodding.
Seeing the doubt, Anakin cupped her face, and raised her gaze to his. "I mean it Padme, you will see me tomorrow. I swear it. Okay?" He assured her, keeping his eyes locked on hers, the two completely forgetting about the very confused and uncomfortable senator a few feet away.
"Okay." She agreed, before leaning in for a brief kiss. Breaking it, Anakin walked out the still open door, nodding to Bail, who was staring at him in complete astonishment.
Padme stood staring at the closed door, worry in her eyes.
"Padme?" Bail finally spoke, confusion in his deep voice.
She shook herself out of the trance, telling herself that Anakin would be fine; he's a Jedi, not a helpless kid. "Sorry Bail, a lot's happened tonight. Please come sit down." She sat back down, Bail joining her. An uncomfortable air settled amongst them, neither quite knowing what to say.
Breaking the silence Padme asked, "What was it you wanted to talk to me about Bail?"
"Oh yes of course." Bail shook his head slightly, reminding himself of the reason he was so frantic to get in touch with the former queen in the first place. "I don't know if you've heard or not, but the Chancellor has been murdered in his office, as well as three Jedi Masters."
Padme nodded. "Yes I have heard." But said nothing more. She didn't know what had been discovered yet, and didn't want to say anything that might incriminate Anakin.
"Do you know anything else about it? No one knows what happened, but another Jedi master was also found on the street, and is in critical condition. The authorities think he was thrown through the window, but they have no clue how he could have survived that." Bail took a breath before continuing.
"Anyway, they think the Jedi and the Chancellor were having a meeting, when another broke in and murdered them all."
Padme kept all her emotions in check, and played the part of the confused Senator, asking "What proof of that do they have?"
Bail shrugged, not seeming to know much. "They have security footage of the Jedi entering, and later another hooded figure entering, then ten minutes later leaving. There are no security cameras inside the chambers so they don't know what happened. They are currently trying to figure out who the cloaked figure is, which they should soon, and then a galaxy wide manhunt is to commence to find this murderer- ". Bail continued talking, but Padme didn't register what he said. She sat back in shock, a newfound wave of fear washing over her. Anakin.
"Mas Amedda will be taking over as he is the Vice-Chancellor, but after a two month mourning/campaigning period, there will be an election for a new Chancellor, that I am running for. I trust I will have your support?" He prompted, giving her a questioning look when she didn't respond. "Padme?"
She suppressed her worried thoughts yet again and gave Bail an apologetic smile. "Yes of course I will support you. Sorry I've been a little distracted, it's been a long night."
Bail nodded, and started mentally debating whether or not to ask his friend about a certain Jedi that she seemed to have grown close too.
Seeing the expression on his face, and not wanting to leave the issue to the imagination of her guest, Padme acknowledged the question she knew Bail wanted to ask.
"I'm guessing you're curious about Anakin, right?"
"Very." Bail blurted out, and then looking a little embarrassed, composed himself and replied, "If you wish to enlighten me, I would appreciate it."
Padme rolled her eyes at her fellow senator's formalness, but went ahead anyway and "enlightened" him.
"Well I can't tell you much, because of what might happen. Just don't worry about it too much, and if you didn't mention it anyone, I would appreciate that a lot." Padme looked pointedly at him, and he nodded. "But I really can't tell you more Bail, sorry." She added quickly, seeing the questions starting to form on his lips. "I understand." He promised, and a silence fell over the two.
After a few seconds, Bail couldn't contain himself, and asked, "May I ask you one thing Padme?"
Padme debating for a few seconds, staring around the room and wondering what he wanted to ask. Finally she nodded, answering, "You can ask but I can't promise I will answer."
The older Senator nodded and then hesitated, not sure she would answer, or if the question was too personal.
"Is Skywalker the father of your child?" He inquired, watching her face carefully.
Padme sighed and closed her eyes. Of course he wanted to know that. Ever since she had revealed to him that she was pregnant a few months ago, unable to hide it from him as she saw him too often, all he asked was about her pregnancy.
"I can't answer that Bail."
But he had already concluded that the Jedi was indeed the father. Based on her reaction, and what he had seen tonight, he had inferred that this wasn't a recent development, he was quite positive his colleague was pregnant with some little Jedi babies.
"If you say so." Bail replied nonchalantly, looking out the windowed-wall, towards the Senate building, which was light up and surrounded by flashing lights. "I wonder when they will figure out who the hooded-murderer is." He mused, taking in the distant activity outside the massive building. "Who knows? I can't say I'm too sad about the chancellor, but don't quote me on that." Bail offered a smile and Padme returned it. Taking a deep breath, he stood up, Padme following suit, as he started to walk towards the front door.
'Well, thank you Bail for letting me know, and please tell me if there are any developments." Padme forced a smile and nodded to her fellow senator as he replied that he would of course and left.
Closing the door after him, Padme turned, and collapsed against it, slumping to the ground, and trying to keep back the tears welling up in her eyes. If they arrested Anakin, she didn't know what she would do. There was no evidence to prove his story, and who would believe him? The only person who could maybe confirm his story was most likely in intensive care, and who knew when or if he would be able to testify. Padme took a deep breath to try and calm herself and struggled back onto her feet by pulling herself up using the door handle. Her stomach made it impossible to do anything..
She made her way to kitchen, and washed the two mugs. Hers was blue and had the words "Night after night, It'll be alright" painted on it, and Anakin's was purple with the phrase "Seventh Best Commander" on it. He had received the hand-painted mug from Ahsoka, his former padawan, for his birthday two years ago, and in return, he had painted her one that said "Fourteenth Best Padawan" last year, shortly before she left the Jedi Order. Padme knew how much the mug meant to Anakin, especially since he hadn't heard from his former padawan in the past year. She knew he still blamed himself for Ahsoka leaving, and how much her absence still hurt him.
Padme's mug Anakin had made the same time he made Ahsoka's, and she cherished it. Whenever she read it, she would hear it in his voice. Truthfully when he had given it to her, she had been surprised he had thought of something so poetic. Later, he revealed to her that it was actually a lyric from a song her had heard and it had made him think of her. Padme had then of course made him sing the song for her and it was now one of their favorites. She usually hated Anakin's music taste, but for once he had made a good call.
She set the mugs on the drying rack, and left the kitchen, turning off the lights as she did. She walked through every room in the house, turning off the lights in each and closing the blinds. After finishing, the pregnant woman decided that a soothing bath was just what she needed and proceeded to turn on the water and light lavender scented candles around the tub. She sat on the rim, waiting for it to fill and pouring in lavender bath soap. When the tub was filled to the brim with bubbly hot water, she took off her nightgown and slowly submerged her achy body. Laying her head back on the rim, a folded towel under her neck, she closed her eyes.
Here, she could dream. She dreamt of a world where she wasn't constantly worried about Anakin. Where he would be here with her, instead of being far away fighting wars and having the weight of the world on his shoulders. She dreamt of them out in the world as a family, not having to hide anymore. But this wasn't the world they lived in.
Padme opened her eyes. What were they going to do when the babies came? They had loosely talked about it, but never actually addressed the problem, neither of them knowing what they were going to do. They had just over two months till they would be born and no idea of what was going to happen after.
She soaked for an hour, got out of the tub and dried off. After preparing for bed, she went to her room. Turning on some quiet, soothing music, she got in bed and tried to get comfortable, putting a pillow under her aching lower back. For an hour she lay, willing sleep to come to her, but it wouldn't.
Alone with her thoughts she tried to work out a best case scenario of what could happen when the babies was born. It involved Anakin staying over weekends and visiting twice a week. But she knew that wasn't realistic, and honestly she just hoped Anakin could manage to visit once every other week. But with all the missions he was sent out on as one of the top commanders, it wasn't a guarantee.
She tried to avoid thinking about was what would happen if the authorities found out Anakin was the hooded man from the security footage. She couldn't afford to think that way, but after a while, she was unable to suppress it and thoughts came flooding up. If Anakin was arrested, she had no idea how to prove his innocence. They would lose a trial, then what? Anakin would be convicted of the murders of the chancellor, and three or four Jedi masters. She couldn't imagine a way he wouldn't be executed. And where would that leave her? Alone with two babies and her other half gone? She shook her self, willing the thoughts to go away and for her mind to let her sleep.
We Pretend It's Alright
This is my second Star Wars story, and I darker approach to the "Happy ever after" approach to the end of the prequels. I have been working on this for a long time, and as I am posting longer chapters, I won't be posting as frequently, but I will try to post once a month.
Thanks for reading and please review to let me know what you think!
Till the next chapter!