Disclaimer: I own nothing.
So I have tried to stave off this, but I can no longer. This is a story that I've been thinking about for a long time, and I could not stop thinking about it, so I decided to write it. This is a rather violent/angsty one, so please bear with me in it. I hope you'll enjoy it!
Many thanks to PolHop and CeeCee333 for helping me with the outline for this story! I couldn't have done it without you guys.
"Did you sign them?"
Derek looked up from his desk where a set of crisp legal papers was. He swallowed hard as his eyes met his wife's. Penelope stood before him with her arms crossed over her chest. Her face was blank as she stared at him.
Holding up the papers, he nodded. "Yeah," he said. His eyes drifted down to their signatures side-by-side on the paper. "All we have to do is file them…then we'll be officially divorced." He rose to his feet and handed them to her. "I, uh, I wanted to make sure you aren't going to try and file for full custody of Idina and Fox."
"No," she murmured. "I would never do that to them. Or to you." She fingered the papers in her hands, looking down at them. "You have to promise me you won't forget about them. You have to spend time with them and not let the job get in the way of your relationship with them."
"The way it did with us." His voice was blunt.
She nodded, looking up at him. "The way it did with us," she repeated.
They stood in silence, the ticking of the clock the only sound in the room as the time neared midnight. Derek nodded as he reminded himself he was going to be going home to his practically empty apartment. He made no effort to speak after she repeated his statement. What more was there to say?
"I'll kiss them goodnight for you when I go home," she told him.
All he did was nod before turning his back on her. His thoughts went to his children, his wonderful and spirited kids who he would do anything for. How would their parents' divorce affect them?
He was jerked out of his thoughts by the sound of his office door closing. Turning around, he expected to see an empty room. Instead though, he found Penelope still there with her back to him. He watched as she locked the door and turned to face him. She strode forward with purpose, tossing the paper on his desk again. Without saying a word, she shoved him backwards against the wall. She grabbed his face and pulled him into a fiery kiss, shocking him completely.
The moment he tasted the lips he loved so much, though, nothing else mattered. He pulled her into his arms, kissing her with the ferocity that couldn't be restrained. Confusion gave way to desire. Hoisting her into his arms, he carried her to his desk, setting her on top of it to allow himself better access to her.
Penelope broke their kiss in order to pull her shirt up over her head. He revealed her lacy black bra, and a growl escaped his throat. No matter what, no matter how long they would be apart, he would always remember her breasts. They were perfect.
Derek's lips descended to the budded nipple that could be seen through the sheer lace of her bra. Tingles of pleasure shot straight to his groin, making him harder. She moaned against his lips, snaking her hand toward his belt buckle to undo it. She slid her hand into his pants, grasping his thick length. He groaned as shocks ran through his body.
"Fuck," he grunted as she ran her hand up and down his cock.
"That's what I want you to do to me," she hissed, pushing his pants down so they fell to his ankles.
His hand shot beneath her skirt to rip her underwear. He stuck his finger inside of her silky wetness. When his hand came out from beneath her clothes, it was coated in her juices. He looked into her eyes, her pupils fully dilated in her aroused state.
"What are we doing?" he grunted, keeping his hands on her thighs.
She unhooked her bra, baring the breasts she knew were like a drug to him. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she pulled him closer so her breath was hot on his face. Her fingers traced circles on the back of his neck.
"Isn't it obvious?" Her voice came out husky, sending shivers up his spine. "We're having 'we just got divorced sex'."
Derek took a moment to think about this, how it was a bad idea to play with fire. But this was Penelope, and playing with fire meant scalding himself. But that didn't matter to him.
So instead of speaking, he pulled her skirt down so it slid to the floor. She ripped at his shirt buttons to run her nails up his muscular abdomen. He took a moment to gaze at her, her head thrown back as she waited expectantly for him to start suckling on her breasts like he usually did when they had sex. Her lily white skin glowed beneath the dim lights of his office, and his groin throbbed even harder. Lifting her glistening thighs, she pulled her all the way to the edge of his desk so he could push into her slick warmth.
"Oh, God!" she cried, digging her nails into his shoulders. Her breath came in frantic exhales. They urged Derek on, making him strive for to bring pleasure to the woman who had utterly broken his heart, just in the way he had broken her spirit.
He pulled her up into his arms, so she was in his embrace. Sweat made their bodies slick, but not so slippery that he would lose hold of her. He knew full well that this would be the last time he would have her in his arms, and he was going to make the most of it. He refused to believe she left him because of lack of love, but that didn't change her decision.
Penelope moaned low in her throat before shocking Derek completely when she sank her teeth into his throat. She nibbled on his skin, suckling as he moved within her.
Neither of them could control themselves long enough to truly draw out their pleasure. Penelope's lips trailed up to his ear, and she whispered, "I'm about to come. Make me come."
Derek didn't respond; he merely sped up. Eventually, the feel of her hands running down his back took him of the edge. He came in thick pulses, groaning against her neck. Seconds later, her tight walls clamped around him.
They said nothing. Derek leaned down to pull up his pants and redo his buckle, next buttoning his shirt back up. Penelope slid off the desk and pulled her skirt back on; she rehooked her bra and put her shirt back on.
Their eyes met.
"We can't do this again," Derek said. He rubbed the top of his head. I wouldn't be able to handle it, he added silently.
She nodded. "This is the last time," she agreed. "It's what's best."
3 Years Later
"Kids, we're home!" Penelope called as she and Derek walked back into the house after having been gone on a two week case. JJ, now the Unit Chief of the BAU after Hotch had retired, needed Penelope on the case, and therefore she had traveled with them.
Derek followed silently behind her. He wasn't home, of course. Three years after his divorce, and he was still living in his apartment he had been in after Penelope left him. However, he could barely contain his excitement to see his children after two weeks of being apart from them.
Twelve year old Fox Morgan came dashing into the foyer with a bright grin on his face. He threw himself into Derek's open arms, hugging him tightly. Smiling with warmth in his face, Derek hugged his son back. The tween boy resembled Penelope's sunny disposition in every possible way. Even his eyes were the same
"Hey, champ," he said, his voice thick.
Fox looked up and allowed his father to ruffle his curly hair. "I'm glad you're home," he said.
"I'm glad to be home," Derek replied. "Go give your mama a hug. She missed you, too."
Without hesitation, Fox rushed over to Penelope to wrap his arms around her. She smiled radiantly, clearly overjoyed to be holding her son in her arms after two weeks of being deprived of seeing him. One thing Derek would always be able to say about his ex-wife was that she loved her children more than the air she needed to survive.
"Hey, my little Time Lord," she said, kissing his forehead as she used the affectionate nickname she had bestowed on him when they began watching Doctor Who together. "You and your sister better have behaved for Grant."
Derek stiffened at the mention of Penelope's boyfriend of two years. The man was the exact opposite of Derek. He was an investment banker, he had golden hair, and he did nothing but smile. He irritated the hell out of Derek.
"Hey," a much softer voice said.
Where Fox acted rambunctious and wild, Idina stayed reserved and serious. She only let her sense of humor come out when she felt completely comfortable. Fox was Penelope's double; Idina was Derek's. She resembled him in every way.
She didn't have any of brother's sunny personality, either. A cloud of depression, diagnosed shortly after her parents split, lay over her.
Descending the stairs, Idina went forward to hug Penelope. She remained silent as she wrapped her arms around her mother. To Derek's great dismay, Idina made no move to hug him.
With concerned eyes, Penelope moved back and cupped her daughter's cheek. "Sweetie, are you okay?" She lowered her voice and tweaked her nose. "Have you been –"
Idina rolled her eyes, pulling back from Penelope's embrace. "Taking my meds?" she grumbled. "Yes."
Derek felt a pang in his heart at the sound of his daughter's voice. He wished with all his heart she would confide in him, like she once had, but since the divorce, none of that relationship truly remained. She blamed him for the split, and she refused to budge on that.
"Dee –" he tried to say.
However, before he could say anything, a booming voice broke out in the foyer. "Welcome home, Penny!"
Grant came into the kitchen, wiping his hands on his apron as he went toward Penelope. He planted a loud kiss on her lips. Penelope smiled at him.
"Hey, honey," she murmured, touching his cheek. It irked Derek that she could act so naturally with this other man – this man who wasn't him. What infuriated him was how she could act this way after what they had done on this last case…what they had done three times on that trip alone.
While Penelope and Grant spoke in hushed tones, Derek followed his children into the living room.
"Dee?" he asked, sitting down on the couch next to Idina. "Dee, will you talk to me?" He was damn near begging. He wanted to hear his daughter speaking to him in some form or another.
Idina looked up from her book at him, but barely glanced at him for more than two seconds. "What?" she muttered.
He looked at her with a wounded expression. "Will you tell me what's going on? It seems like you might be going through another episode, and –"
"How the hell would you know?" she snapped. "You don't pay attention enough to know what a depressive episode looks like for me."
Derek placed a hand on her shoulder, trying to be a comfort to her. He failed miserably, at least according to Idina. She stood up abruptly. "Baby," he tried.
"Leave me alone, Dad!" she muttered, hurrying out of the room with her book clutched tightly to her chest.
Derek's spirit completely deflated. He rubbed his face tiredly, lamenting how his relationship with his daughter was strained, he never got to see his son, and the closest he would ever get to be with Penelope anymore were the times they were unable to control their primal sexual desire for one another.
Fox's voice broke Derek out of his internal disappointment with himself. Looking at his son who had come to plop himself down next to him, he patted Fox on the back.
"What's up, bud?" he asked.
"Why doesn't Dee want to talk to you ever?" Fox asked, curious.
Because I'm not a good father, Derek thought.
Instead, he hid his thoughts and lied. "Not sure," he said with a soft voice. "It'll be okay, though."
Problem was, he was unsure of how things would actually be okay.