Summary: Tamaki has spent all of the Black Knights' funds on treating the newbies, so Zero needs a new source of income. Luckily C.C has a plan and Pizza Hut needs a sponsor. What has Lelouch got planned? Oneshot crackfic. Slightly OCC characters.

Code Geass: Pizza Hut Of The Rebellion

Zero POV

So here I am in the Black Knights' HQ, just chilling on the sofa and thinking about what kind of stunt to pull next. However I am reeled from my musings as Oghi comes up to me with a letter.

"Oh, what's this?" I ask my loyal subordinate. He seems to smirk a little before saying it's a 'love letter'. So I decide to humor him. "From you?" This sends Tamaki in a fit of laughter and Oghi is blushing a tiny bit.

"Uh, no Zero… it's from Kyoto… they want to meet you." He says straightening himself up after that little outburst. "This would be a good chance to get more equipment and replenish the lack of funds-" He never got the chance to end his statement as I interrupt… A tick mark forming on my head but they can't see it under the mask.

"Replenish the funds?" Tamaki looks uncomfortable and Kallen is glaring dagger at the guilty Black Knight. Sighing, I continue. "If you had followed the spending allowance I came up with we wouldn't need more funds."

Kallen decides to put in her own 2 cents. "Yeah, he's been treating the newbies to look cool. Big Spender! I know where you go Tamaki." Tamaki, by now is trembling under the glares of Kallen, Oghi and myself.

I sigh for the umpteenth time that day when I realize that Kyoto won't give us the funds needed in time. Originally I was going to give Oghi Tamaki's responsibility of the funds but decided against it… it wouldn't do good for fighting and arguing in the ranks.

{Timeskip Lelouch's Room}

Never in my life have I been happier to retreat from the world outside and fall into the comfort of my bed. I am currently in a white t-shirt with black bottoms, my usual sleepwear.

I open my eyes and sigh (again) as I see the floor is covered in empty Pizza Hut boxes with a certain annoying, green haired witch lying there… making freaking Pizza Angels on my floor! The absolute hell?

The witch looks up at my fuming self and just smirks like a fox… the nerve of her! "So Lelouch, do you wanna build a pizzaman?" Wait what? A pizzaman? I really shouldn't have left her with my credit card and Nunnally's Frozen DVD collection… I thought Anna was annoying but C.C? That's a whole new level of annoying!

I shake these thoughts off and try to keep my cold and calculating demeanor, which I usually posses, and sit back down on the bed. "Witch, if you wanna make yourself useful, you could at least find a reliable source of income to keep the Black Knights funded."

That catches her attention as she stops doing… um... whatever it is she was doing in the pizza boxes and pizza leftovers. Her usual annoying smirk was replaced with one of interest as she plops down onto the bed next to me. "I'll see what I can do," There's going to be a but! "but you have to ask Milly to make a giant pizza for me." I just sweatdrop at C.C's antics; some things will never change.

Nodding, she smirks at me and says I might as well get some sleep, she's not going to be in my bed tonight. That sounded wrong…

{Timeskip After school, next day}

Classes have just finished so I might as well stretch my legs and ponder on Zero's future 'miracles'. I had actually attended a class today without falling asleep or reading on the roof, so my energy is kinda low.

As I walk into town, I notice a fleck of green at the Pizza Hut nearby. So stealthily I creep closer to see what's going on. Just outside of the Pizza Hut, C.C is talking with what I think is the manager. Judging by her appearance I'd say C.C was up all night looking for funding for the Black Knights.

I see the manager nodding before entering the building through the back door, C.C just turns to me and smirks that trademark smirk of hers. "You know I can see you, right Lelouch?" Dang it! How did she find me? I can get past my teachers to go gambling unnoticed yet that witch can still see me… meh whatever, I wonder if she actually got the funding.

Stepping out of the shadows, I start talking to her. "So I take it you got the funding right?" She nods at me and explains why.

"You see Lelouch, this Pizza Hut branch makes the best Pizzas in the entire Tokyo Settlement. They, however are also losing funds and need a sponsor to keep them going. So what sponsor better than the Black Knights? They said they were willing to help fund us if we sponsor them." After the explanation I can't help but do my Zero laugh… passersbys were very disturbed by the sound of 'evil' laughing coming from a dark alleyway so they steered clear.

"There is a catch though," And I'm brought from my madman laughing fit. "Zero has to appear at least once in a Pizza Hut commercial." So a bit of publicity huh? Good job I have an unhealthy obsession for theatrics and have my very own reporter at my fingertips. Yes! The Black Knights will get fundings! Pizza Hut will get buyers and the Black Knights will create peace through food!

All I have to do now is tell the Black Knights about this new development… I guess I should thank Tamaki for this.

{Black Knights HQ}

All of the Black Knights are gathered in front of me, time for the big reveal! Many people were muttering among themselves about what is going to happen. Tamaki was sweating buckets under Kallen's glare, she still hasn't forgiven him for going against my budget.

"Black Knights!" My booming voice sounds throughout our mobile HQ. "I have gathered you here today to inform you of a recent development." Members were shaking in anticipation, I couldn't resist the urge to do this… "And we all have Tamaki to thank!" And there it was! All eyes on a very embarrassed/confused Tamaki. His look is so priceless, God I'm finding it hard to contain my laughter. I wonder if C.C has a camera.


"Atchoo!" Sneezes a certain green haired witch. But the sneeze is soon forgotten as soon as she takes another picture of Tamaki from God knows where.

{Back with Zero}

To save the poor guy more hassle, I decide to pick up from where I left off. "Due to Tamaki's big spending of our funds, we have found a way to get more publicity and support from the world. A reliable source of mine has secured a partnership with a popular business going bankrupt. If we sponsor them, it's a win win situation. The people like us for saving a well loved business and we get funds from the sponsor."

Everyone goes wide eyed at revelation, 'what business is so popular it would solve the Black Knights' funding problems as well as getting more publicity?' is their thoughts. Kallen is the first out of her stupor and she asks the smart question of which business we are going to save.

"Why none other than the beloved Pizza Hut!" An uproar of cheers is heard throughout the mobile HQ… Now I'm glad the nobleman who originally owned it made it soundproof… gotta wonder why though.

As everyone quiets down I continue my announcement. "I will be going to record a commercial for Pizza Hut in 2 hours, Diethard," Said man stands to attention. "I want you to film and broadcast the commercial, Kallen," Said girl stands to attention. "We need an actor" 'Fanservice!' "And Tamaki" Tamaki looks rearing and ready to go. "you and Oghi watch over the others for me." And with that I exit the room to my personal office.

{2 Hours later}

A knocking noise comes at my door, so I put down my sewing kit and notepad as I call for the knocking Black Knight members to enter.

Diethard enters first, quickly followed up by Kallen. "Zero, we're all set. The only question is, are you?" I smirk at Diethard's remark and follow him and Kallen out of the HQ and into a warehouse filled with props, pizza, cameras, lights, monitors and a green screen. C.C is waiting there, after all, this was her idea so it's only fair she be in the ad.

Kallen dressed in a red, revealing bunny suit with a blue wig on her head and C.C was dressed as an ordinary Black Knight member.

"Let's get this show on the road!" I can barely contain my excitement, neither can Diethard. To him this is like a dream come true.

{1 hour of filming later}

I can't help but smile at the finished version. Once it's been completed it will be aired and people will flock towards Pizza Hut and the Black Knights will no longer have a problem with funding.

"Good work guys! Kallen, please get out of that costume, Diethard, send the final version to Pizza Hut then broadcast it to the world. C.C, go to Ashford Academy, Pizza Hut has helped Milly make that giant pizza you asked for." So everyone set out for their respective jobs and I sneak out of the warehouse unnoticed. When I'm alone and away from HQ, I change out of my Zero costume and run to my room in Ashford Academy.

Tomorrow is going to be fun and I want to see how the school reacts to the commercial.

{The Following Day}

As I wake up, I try not to do anything out of the ordinary. Mainly not to squeal in excitement or laugh menacingly at the thought of the ad. But hey, the ad isn't gonna show until the lunch as to get people running there at lunchtime. All according to plan!

{11:59 Student Council Room}

It's just a minute away from be broadcasted and I can barely stop shaking. Luckily nobody noticed my slight twitches. Kallen on the other hand is a completely different story. She claims it's a part of her 'sickness' so nobody really put much thought to into it.

All of the student council, sans Nunnally, are present and currently watching the TV. I check my watch and smile slightly. 3… 2… 1… NOW! The ad is now airing internationally on every TV on every station in every nation on every radio and even on the streets. It is everywhere! Time to inspect my masterpiece!

{On TV's everywhere}

The screen goes to the Pizza Hut logo and a voice is overlaid saying 'and now a message from ours sponsor'.

Then the screen fades to a desert-like setting with a figure walking across the vast desert looking like crap. The camera zooms in to the figure revealing long green hair and the standard Black Knights uniform as well as the eyes being covered by the signature Black Knights visor and is clearly female. All of a sudden, the Black Knights member stops abruptly before an oasis blurs into existence. The member dashes towards the oasis only to trip over a tumbleweed. She looks back at the oasis but frowns as it was just a mirage.

Regardless of this letdown, she gets back up and continues her trek into nothingness. The she sees a dark cave appear on her left and an oasis on her right. she has to chose whether she goes down the dark path or the light path. After a moment she decides to follow the dark path as it seems to not be a mirage.

She enters the cave and is met with a wonderful sight. There is water! So she runs towards the water and eagerly drinks it, savoring the taste. Once done, she turns around and is greeted by a Zero. He welcomes her with opens arms and asks if she's alright. The Black Knights member nodded before saying that she was feeling a little hungry.

Immediately Zero clicks his finger and the dark cave is turned into a gold gave of wonder. As he does this, a well endowed woman in a bunny suit with blue hair comes out of the shadows holding a Pizza Hut box.

The scene ends with a subtitle saying :'Pizza Hut Supports The Rebellion'.

{Back to Reality}

I was inwardly smirking that the ad got the message across. The Black Knights member represented a number, the oasis represented the current honorary Britannian system being a delusional mirage to stimulate fake peace and the dark cave represented the Black Knights. Looks may be deceiving so don't let that dark look put you off, it could be where true peace is found.

Overall, I'm glad my wit, Tamaki's spending problems and C.C's obsession of pizza came in handy. Hey I might as well see how the others reacted to this turn of events. So I turn my head to face a squealing Kallen, shellshocked Nina, hyper Rivalz, hungry Shirley, contemplating Suzaku and a thoughtful Milly. Perfect… oh wait, I gotta act shocked!

"Well then… that was enlightening… so anybody wanna come with me onto the roof to see the uproar outside? Afterall, Pizza Hut is a block away." I ask the student council members who all share a look before legging it along with myself to observe the current carnage unfolding outside. Such fun!

{1 year later}

Well long story short, the whole Pizza Hut incident was a success and the World is now at peace. Who would've thought that the Emperor was so obsessed with Pizza? Maybe because he knew C.C? Well anyhow, me, Zero, is now a figurehead and the Black Knights are now in charge of Japan. the natives aren't abused anymore and the world has united under one nation: The United Nations of Justice! I came up with that one, hehe.

Well how was that? I decided to do this for whatever reason. Also I have decided not to EVER update my other stories. They are just ideas to be expanded on. Talking of which, PM me if you would like to expand this or use this as a plotline to another fanfic. Until then MBlasterXD out!