Felicity hadn't opened up a lot about what had happened. Truth was, Oliver was the only one who knew what had happened with The Count. And even then she had never really explained in detail what took place. And truth was Oliver didn't need to know the details. All that mattered was he knew the gist and was there for her as she recovered.
Oliver had agreed to not tell anyone else, including Diggle, what had happened if Felicity promised to get really help for what she had been through. He could tell that she was repressing a lot and the chatroom she had been getting help from wasn't cutting it. So Felicity agreed to go to counseling. She seemed to be making progress too. She no longer jumped at every little sound or shied away from Oliver and Diggle when they got near her. She started to seem more like herself with every passing day.
Three months since The Count's death and Felicity started to finally sleep at night again. But not tonight. Tonight she stared at the box in her purse. She should have been paying attention to her computers or searching for some criminal for Oliver to take down, but instead she couldn't take her eyes from the box. It tempted her. It questioned her. It invaded her every thought until she had no choice but to move.
She was down in the foundry by herself since Dig and Oliver were on patrol. They wouldn't be back for at least another hour so she figured now was her best time to do this. She grabbed the box from her bag and made her way to the bathroom. She removed the small stick from the box and turned to the stall.
After exiting the stall she sat set the stick down on the sink and turned the timer on her phone. She began to pace back and forth. This was the last possible thing that she wanted to happen because of her encounter with The Count. Thoughts raced through her head until she felt like she was spinning in circles.
The timer on her phone went off and she jumped at the sound. Turning she approached the sink nervously. The stick was at her fingertips, but she couldn't bring herself to pick it up and just see the answer to that nagging question that had been floating in the back of her mind.
Oh just do it Smoak! You gotta find out one way or another and it might as well be now.
Finally she picked up the stick and looked at the results.
"Hey guys, I'm not feeling too well. I know you are on your way back but I think I'm gonna head out early." Felicity said over the coms.
"Are you okay Felicity?" Dig asked.
"Yeah, I'm just feeling tired and realized I haven't exactly gotten more than about 8 hours of sleep altogether in the past 4 days so…"
"Okay, well stay safe and let us know when you get home." Dig replied.
"Okay will do."
Felicity didn't have a clue how she was going to tell Dig or Oliver. She knew that Oliver would understand, but Dig would be confused and then she would have to explain and… she really just wasn't ready for that.
Not ready to tell Dig. Hell I'm not ready to be a mom!
There was a knock at the front door. Felicity knew exactly who it was and although she didn't really wanna talk about this right now, she knew she had to at least tell Oliver to go home. Opening the door, she had expected to find a concerned Oliver, but what she found was a panicked Oliver.
"Felicity… are you okay?" Oliver rushed into the apartment, shutting the door behind him. He gripped her shoulders and looked down into her face. Fear laced his voice.
"Yeah, I'm fine. I told you that I was just tired and needed some sleep." Felicity tried to keep her voice somewhat calm as she spoke her lie.
"That is complete crap Felicity and we both know it. What is really going on?" Oliver wasn't taking any of her lies, not tonight. She had been quiet all night and then just up and leaves early. That was out of character for her and he knew something was up. He had been concerned about her ever since the incident at Queen Consolidated three months back. He had tried not to hover over her, but he couldn't help but watch her. She was in a fragile state, even if she wouldn't admit it, and he wasn't about to let her deal with this alone. She needed help and support even if she didn't realize it.
"I…" Felicity sputtered and Oliver's harsh voice. She knew he was just concerned but it was still overwhelming. She turned, motioning for Oliver to wait a moment, then walked over to her purse where she pulled out the pregnancy test. With a shaky breath, she walked back over to where he stood watching her and deliberately placed the test into his hand.
He looked down at her face for a moment before turning his attention to the stick in his hand. For a few seconds he was confused, then he realized what he was holding and what she was saying.
"You're… pregnant?" Oliver asked in a whisper.
Felicity nodded and then turned and walked over to the sofa and flopped down. It seemed her legs couldn't hold her up anymore. Oliver followed behind her, sitting directly next to her, watching her face intently. A single tear slipped down her face.
"I don't know what to do Oliver. Please, tell me what to do." She begged.
Oliver's heart broke at her words. He brought his arm around her shoulders and pulled her head down onto his chest. "I don't know Felicity. I don't know." He rubbed her back and let her sob into his shirt. He figured that this was the first time that she had really let out any emotion about the pregnancy since she found out.
"Oliver, I don't want to have his kid. I don't want him to haunt me the rest of my life." She cried.
"I know sweetheart. But you can't look at it that way. This baby is yours, not his. He never had the right to that." Oliver tried to sooth her.
"I don't know if I can do this on my own. I mean my child won't have a father. No one to call daddy. How can I do that to my child. How do I explain that?!"
Oliver kissed the top of her head before pulling back to look down into her face.
"Felicity, you are not alone. You know you have me and Dig and Thea and everyone else here for you. We won't let you go through this alone. I won't let you do this alone. And as for the baby having a dad, well… it will have some hell of protective and loving uncles." He tried to smile and reassure her.
"But it won't have a dad. It will forever wonder what is wrong with it that it doesn't have a dad like other kids." Another tear slipped down her face.
Oliver knew that now wasn't really the time to say this, but it didn't seem like he had any other choice.
"Felicity, this baby will not lack for love. And I will personally make sure that he or she will have a father. I'll make sure that they never wonder about where dad went. I will love this child."
Felicity froze looking up into Oliver's serious face. What was he saying?
"What do you mean Oliver?"
"I mean that I will be the father to this child and love it as my own. I mean that I will raise this baby with you and support you and love you both with all that I have."
"Oh Oliver," she gasped. She placed her hand along his jaw and leaned up slowly to kiss his lips lightly. "Thank you."
"Of course." Oliver responded.
"Oh and Oliver," Felicity locked eyes with him, "I love you too."