1A/N: cats love gotham too, i never wrote fan fiction before but i did it with much love. i don't speak english, worry not, google translator is my best friend now jkakakakakaka
I gave up counting sheep. I couldn't find either sleep or bravery to stare at their eyes. But all those stubborn sheep keep looking at me. Reveries, bad memories flow through my insomniac mind. There comes a time when the alcohol does not meet its intended purpose. I haven't been sleeping, because I've been afraid of what dreams may come. Won't you sing a lullaby to me, Mother?
Sky has begun to pour its tears. It does upset me. If it rains, the waiting for the ones who will never turn up gets excruciating. I long for you Mother, although I know you are somewhere there watching over me. I miss the warm milk you gave me when I got sick. I want to hear bedtime stories coming out of your mouth again. I felt your scent tonight. It's your birthday. I have bought you some gifts.
I hate brooding over, but I can't stand to forget because then you come to life again. It's said remembering helps to lessen grief and fault, but I am not able to erase my own mind.
I have been wandering through this burg mean streets. I sink into the crowd but I feel like I'm crossing a desert. Last night, I chanced upon a few dogs. I've tried to befriend them. They were so withdrawn. Making friends has never been my strong suit, but I provided them some food I had in my pockets. Its prey drive implies the weakest must get subdued. Some covered me, some chose to bite. I felt nothing.
All I ever had it was you, my old lady. You never had anything besides me. There were the other children always pestering me. No one wanted to be around me. When I went down, you were always there willing to lift me up. And then, times when I was submerging in my own vale of tears, there you would be right behind me, carrying me up to the surface. My beautiful laddie, you're amazing. You have been the most graceful creature I've laid my eyes on.
Why are mothers allowed to go away? I know there's never a forever thing. I am aware people get wrinkles, gray hairs and eventually die. Some come and go from our lives without due permission, while they remain lively in our remembrance. Nevertheless of, Mothers should never go from our lives.
Mothers know no limits, even when the wind is fiercely whistling and rainfall comes crashing down, their light is never put out. It's an utter riddle why providence is mindful as to taking them one day from us. Death must to fall upon what is fleeting. Mothers' grace is everlasting. I wish I could appoint an act. Mothers never would draw their last breath. And we, even aged, shall be theirs little ones. This is the very ecstasy of love. However, sometimes our wills and fates take another route.
I will carry what you taught me for the rest of my life. Living in the past has a great value as a reminder and a lesson. Time just drives forwards, though. In the face of brutality, I have been resilient. I let my pride be slayed in pursuit of honor. It's our downfalls, rather than ours triumphs, which have the pivotal impact on life. Recovering to fight again is what determines the ultimate outcome.
Conscience does make cowards of us all, a bard once said. I'm learning to fight my own battles. I won't play tender. Children prey on children. Men prey on men. I am a heart-departed being with more insults at my shoulders than I have thoughts to put them in. In a town where men carry daggers in their smiles, I must be kind only to be cruel. Blood urges blood.
But, Mother, I remember you. I still do.
A/N: i wanna write more about gotham, i'll if feedback is good. make a cat happy. xoxo