42Disclaimer: Dream Works and Cressida Cowell own the How to Train Your Dragon franchise.
...You know, after the whole affair with the Red Death, I thought everyone was done with the "making fun of Hiccup" thing. Except Mildew. And some from the other tribes (like, y'know, Dagur). It was like everyone thought I had gone crazy. Okay, maybe they had a point, but… I'm not really sure it's possible to come off as anything but weird…
"Come on, Astrid!"
"Hiccup..."
"I swear, I'm telling the truth!"
"...You're only making your case worse."
I picked up and held the only remaining piece of dragon fruit on my hands and shook it around. "I'm telling you, these turned you all into dragons!"
"Uh-huh…." Astrid bemoaned, looking at me cross. "And you also said that we busted out of our clothes and tore them to shreds…" I took up one of the rags that made up Astrid's shirk all torn.
She just rolled her eyes, dismissive. "Just because it looks like it's mine doesn't mean it is…"
"And I showed you the shredded clothes! Snotlout, yours were even burnt!"
Snotlout shrugged, uncaring about it between gulps of fresh meat. He was more interested in breakfast.
I sighed... would ANY of them believe me?
"We believe you!" Said Tuffnut, his grin so big I bet my dad could see it.
"Yeah, we REALLY believe you...' Ruff said, confirming the sarcasm.
"Thank you for having your faith in me," I bitterly said. Yeah, definitely "everyone make fun of Hiccup day" again. Have they been waiting for this?
The twins bumped their fists together, exchanging wily grins. Sometimes I really have to wonder if I could do better. I mean, the twins still owe me a new satchel.
I sighed and turned to the only other person I thought who would have my back… now if only he would stop chasing his dragon.
"Come here girl! Come here!" Cried Fishlegs as he attempted chase after his dragon.
Meatlug went behind a rock. In a manner that reminded me of yesterday's shenanigans Fishlegs went after her, duplicating his movements almost step by step. Meatlug however did not seem to like being anywhere near her owner, not after yesterday.
"Aw, what's wrong?" Fishlegs cried out. "Does my breath stink?" He then blew into a hand and took a deep sniff. His expression turned sour and he wiped his palms against the dirt.
"She's still probably making sure you aren't going to, well…" I put my fingers together and twiddled my thumbs. How was I supposed to explain this anyways?
Fishlegs looked at me skeptically. "Hiccup, if it's about people turning into dragons; I'll have you know it's logically impossible!"
"But you were a Gronckle and well…" I winced. Oh perfect timing to have a small nervous breakdown over topics like this.
"Well if that did happen," Fishlegs took out his notebook. "I'd have to at least grow many times my size to be even a Gronckle."
"Which you did," I pointed out.
"Yes. But eating a single fruit wouldn't give me the necessary…." He struggled to find the word. "Bulk to get so large. Second is of course turning into a dragon would require massive amounts of physical changes done in a short amount of time. I mean, I'd have to grow scales and all. And that's impossible."
"Loki did that a lot!" I pointed out. I mean, seriously, we both knew about Odin's brother's shapeshifter tendencies. I mean, he turned into a horse.
"Loki is a god," said Fishlegs. "A fruit doesn't have that kind of power."
"Fruits are what make gods immortal in the first place!"
Fishlegs opened his mouth and then closed it for a dead moment. "... Those don't count." To you. "Besides, wouldn't we remember it?"
"I don't know you know don't!" I kept saying. Seriously, I think I hate magic fruit... gets me all tongue-tied
But with no one to side with me, I was left with a very untrustworthy reptile. "Toothless?"
My dragon just let out a snigger. Great, he wasn't having my back either.
I turned to the other dragons other than Meatlug. Now I was desperate. "What about you guys?"
Stormfly grunted something, not exactly sounding fond of pleased to be asked that. She probably didn't want to recall last night, probably because she had issues getting along with her rider.
Barf and Belch weren't a help either. Mostly because, like their riders, they believed in making my life as annoying as possible.
Hookfang did not speak up, mostly because Snotlout, now having completely eaten through his plate was trying to get Hookfang to roll onto his side in another attempt to get Astrid's attention. He was failing at it, but don't tell him I said that. Hookfang did his best to not move, as if the difference between his "master" being a dragon or not wasn't important enough to make note of.
Yeah, I am looking like an idiot after this.
"Are you done yet?" complained Astrid.
"...Done with what?" I countered.
"...All this 'We turned into dragons' stuff, duh!" Snotlout answered for Astrid.
She groaned. "Yeah...that."
...Honestly, if I knew how they reverted, I'd take a bite of the fruit then and there to prove my point. As it was, I wanted to show up back home with SOME semblance to sanity. Now I was sure they were going to think I ended up getting food poisoned and hallucinated. "But… you don't remember last night at all..."
"...Y'sure? I don't think much time's passed..." 'Lout griped. And was promptly slapped by Astrid.
"Uh, well, I don't think we brought any mead," said Fishlegs. "I think I remember eating the fruit... last."
I perked up. Maybe they'd start believing me now?
Astrid squinted her eyes. "Hm… I do too."
Yes. Yes. I am not going crazy.
"Maybe they made us all have a hangover," said Snotlout.
And then my hopes were put into jeopardy. "Wait,"
"That's… a good point," admitted Fishlegs. He did a quick double take. "Well…"
"...Wouldn't a hangover leave you with worse than memory loss?" Tuffnut asked.
"Not like we know from experience or anything..." Said Ruffnut evasively.
That earned them some looks.
"Guys… I remember last night…"
"Or you remember getting drunk. Didn't you eat a fruit like we did?" Astrid asked.
"Uh, no," I answered. "Toothless wanted some attention first so I didn't."
"Or maybe you don't remember it because you were hallucinating like the rest of us… " Fishlegs suggested. "I mean, really, turning into dragons just ridiculous don't you think?"
"... But the clothes and the cage?" I felt beads of sweat trickle down my back. I needed to get more proof. "The twins stole my things and…"
"And that's unusual how?" Astrid raised an eyebrow.
I cringed. She was right. The twins did that stuff constantly; I needed something else. "You were … flirting with me."
Astrid's face turned red. "Hiccup!" She cried.
I earned a slap for it. Everyone laughed, though they became rather nervous about it after Astrid turned looks to them. Not that it fully stopped the sniggers.
Well, she did try to flirt with me. Even gave me her "food" like always. Though I probably shouldn't mention a comparison of THAT either way. On the other hand… maybe I was imagining everyone turning into dragons. It was pretty impossible right?
...yeah, it had to be, I'm sure of it...yep, pretty freaking sure...best we put this behind us."Let...Let's just head back, alright? And never mention this again...please?"
A chorus of reluctant affirmation was the only reply I received.
The trip home was mercifully silent. I didn't talk with anyone, working to instead working out how to suppress those assuredly fake memories. The others just chattered amongst themselves, ignoring me - thankfully.
I gave a maddened laugh. My friends turning into dragons. How rich?
I mean, how else would I explain my friends turning out the same kind of creatures as their own dragons? It was too much of a coincidence and unreal.
I still probably needed to get back at Toothless for not having my back, even if it was a hallucination. Maybe I could give threaten to give him eels or tease him with dragon nip-
"FIRE!" I broke my train of though just in time to hear Fishlegs shouting, directing our attention towards the...village…
HOLY ODIN WHAT HAPPENED? There were clouds of smoke rising from where Berk was. Was there an attack while we were away? Alvin? Dagur again?
True to form, Astrid raced on ahead, Stormfly beating her wings rapidly to accelerate her Rider to the village. Not to be left behind, I followed her.
With the fastest dragon in the air, I rode forth, kicking Toothless into the fastest he could. I readied and steeled myself to meet an enemy force.
...Dragons. Dragons EVERYWHERE. Far more than we had in the stables or the Ring, and many I hadn't seen before and that's counting all of the raids or in the dragon's old nesting grounds. Were we being attacked by a Red Death or something?
They didn't bother me for some reason. Toothless swooped down so I could get a better look at... ye gods, what happened to my house? To the Ring?
...to Dad?
...wait why was this Thunderdrum approaching me.
I had Toothless bolt to the ground. I didn't want to fight. We jetted into the nearest building that wasn't on fire and locked the door. The dragon rubbed its head against it, making thuds and noise as it did.
It whimpered and took off a minute later.
Once it was clear, I poked my head out and scanned the streets. Where was everyone?
Nearby was an empty barrel, holding only one...dragonfruit...
...it wasn't a dream, was it?
I turned to Toothless. "...You could've warned me, you stupid lizard."
He just grinned as I heard some people - thank Odin, PEOPLE - run inside my building. They were somewhere in the upstairs by the sound of things. I quickly rushed towards the top, climbing the nearest stairway I could find and found myself oddly disappointed. "Uh… hey guys!" I cackled nervously.
Upon their faces were bewildered looks. "Uh, where did all of the people go?" wondered Snotlout.
"And where'd all these dragons come from?" Fishlegs added.
I held up the fruit in my palms.
Astrid squinted her eyes, still skeptical. "You can't be serious!"
I felt myself grow a little more unhinged with every chuckle; now was I going to go mad if I was aware I was going mad? I don't know. "Everyone but me ate this!" Trader Johann must have had way too much of these to give away, enough to flood the whole town in dragons.
Even the twins looked at me like I was crazy. "You are insane," said Tuffnut.
"Yeah, what he said," agreed Ruffnut.
Yeah, definitely an odd day when the twins think I was off the deep end.
I found myself letting out more of a half-deranged (or maybe all-deranged, I couldn't be sure) laugh. "Well, what do you think happened to everyone?"
Not a word was said.
"See. I told you!" With that victory, I realized I was feeling a little peckish. I took a quick a bite to eat.
End: I guess the story's title is a bit inaccurate now...
Ket: ...does he even realize what he just ate? *slides you some juice*
End: *pushes juice away* I'm fairly sure he's lost his sanity before eating it already.
Ket: Well I hope he gets it back... well, when he reverts that is. *notices the juice* Awww, you didn't fall for it…
End: I know your tricks.