Just a quick songfic for edorazzi .tumblr 's Twin AU. Check them out, they rock!
"How DARE you?"
Felix clenched his fists, looking at the ground and hating everything about what was happening.
"It wasn't Adrien's fault, Father."
"Does it look like I CARE? YOU, Felix, do NOT get to question my authority to punish as I see fit!" Gabriel Agreste stared down at his son, anger radiating off of him like waves.
"I'll take the punishment then!" Felix growled, looking up at his father.
Suddenly, a hand was on his shoulder. Adrien. "Please, Felix. Stop."
Have you ever wondered, well I have…
There was a panicked look in his brother's eyes. They weren't supposed to fight their father. Standing up to him, especially on the other's behalf, was a guarantee of trouble, but Felix hadn't been able to take his brother being yelled at anymore for something that wasn't entirely his fault. How was Adrien supposed to make it to the photo shoot when he was saving Paris?
If Felix had just taken up the job, Adrien wouldn't have missed the damn photo shoot and this wouldn't be happening… but how could he have known? It wasn't like he kept track of every move his brother made…
About how when I say, say, red, for example… there's no way of knowing if red means the same in your head…
"You want to take the punishment?" his father looked down, coldly. "Fine. You're not allowed out of this house for a week. Hand over the key."
Felix smirked, tossing the key to his father. "Deal."
Catching the key, his father looked angrier than ever. "A month, then, if you're so flippant about it."
Gabriel ground his teeth. "Go get your cell phone. And computer."
"Can I tell Bridget that I'll be gone?"
As red means in my head, when someone says 'red?'
"Stop it!" Adrien looked between his father and brother, locked in a mental poker game, seeing who would fold first. "Please, Felix, don't!" Felix didn't look away from Gabriel, but couldn't help faltering in his determination.
"Leave us alone, Adrien. Your brother has decided to let you off the hook for missing that photo shoot."
"Felix, please, I can take the punishment, I actually did something-"
"And I did something worse," Felix arched a brow.
And how, if we are traveling at almost the speed of light, and we're holding a light...
Felix knew his father wouldn't be able to carry out the punishment. Not for a whole month… probably.
Gabriel knew that Felix was challenging him. Threats had always worked in the past, and they would work now if there were enough of them… probably.
"You cannot talk to Bridget. You cannot leave this house. You can NOT go off into the city for hours like you tend to do…"
"I get the picture."
"Felix, are you crazy?"
"You also cannot ask Adrien to bring messages to your little friends. If I find out you've disobeyed this, I will punish Adrien accordingly." Gabriel knew he'd found the spot to press as soon as the words came out of his mouth. "You can stop this little game of yours now, if you want to. Just say, 'I want to go outside.' Then, we can pretend this never happened."
"You'll punish Adrien then, right?"
"Adrien disobeyed me, so yes."
That light would still travel away from us at the full speed of light, which seems right, in a way.
"Just say it, please!" Adrien begged his brother. "It's not going to do anyone any good-"
"Silence! I thought I told you to leave?" Gabriel held up a hand to his younger (albeit by ten minutes) son.
But I'm trying to say, I'm not sure, but I'm wondering inside my head…
Felix looked between Adrien and Gabriel, and he began to crack. "I…"
"You?" Gabriel smirked.
"I…" Felix looked at the ground. "I…"
I'm not just a bit different from some of my friends.
The fact was, the only bad part of the punishment would be the part his father didn't know he was implementing. He wouldn't be able to continue as Chat Noir… if, that was, Gabriel wasn't just bluffing. As the battle of wills continued, Felix was less and less sure that this was a bluff though.
He was at risk of losing a lot.
"I… I want…"
He wasn't sure if he could bring himself to give in…
"…I want to go outside," he finally said, giving in to his father, before storming up the stairs. You didn't go up against Gabriel Agreste and win.
These answers, they come into my mind, unbidden, these stories delivered to me, fully written.
It was set from as soon as he asked his father to stop yelling at Adrien. Felix was never going to win against his dad. An akuma? Sure, but that wasn't him, really.
The shouting came from downstairs, louder than before, and Felix buried his head in a pillow on his bed. "I'm weak," he muttered.
And when everyone shouts (they seem to like shouting), the noise in my head is incredibly loud…
"I'm pathetic." The thoughts ran through his head. "I can't even stand up for my own brother. I'm entirely worthless."
The yelling downstairs had stopped, and Gabriel slammed open the door to Felix's room. "You do not get to challenge me. It won't end well for you… or your brother. You have no power, Felix. Learn that quickly."
The door slammed, leaving Felix alone.
And I just wish they'd stop, my dad and my mum, and the screens, and the stories would stop for just once…
He walked out to the balcony, a mix of humiliation, rage, and despair coursing though him. "What's the point of having powers if I can't even save Adrien from our goddamn Father?" he kicked the balcony railing.
I'm sorry. I'm not quite explaining it right, but this noise becomes anger, and the anger is light!
"Plagg," Felix hissed. The kwami appeared beside him, sharp-toothed grin flashing. They both knew that Plagg didn't like Felix much.
"What do you want?"
"If I transform now, how long can I keep it up?"
Plagg gave him a long look. "You can keep it up until you use Cataclysm."
Felix stared at him. "Indefinitely?"
"Why didn't you tell us that?" Felix hissed. "You know Adrien would have… oh, you asshole."
"Yeah. No, I like having time off, thanks," Plagg snorted.
And its burning inside me would usually fade, but it won't today!
"Well, forget it. I'm sick of this house, I'm sick of this powerlessness… Plagg, claws out!"
And the heat and the shouting and my heart is pounding and my eyes are burning and suddenly everything, EVERYTHING IS…
The transformation began, as Felix leaped off the balcony, and the costume took over him, and then he was racing over the buildings, using the staff to launch himself over the city, and…
He stopped at the top of the Eiffel Tower, and the silence swept over him.
Like silence, but not really silent.
The heat of his house was gone, replaced by the cool night breeze as he sank to his knees, looking over the city. It felt so good that he couldn't stand it…
The city was kind of beautiful at a distance. He didn't like being in the middle of it all, of course… people weren't his forte. God knew what went on in that city was rarely nice. That didn't make the view less beautiful, though, and in that moment, Felix was glad to live in the city.
Just that still sort of quiet, like the sound of a page being turned in a book.
He ran from the tower, launching himself to the ground, and then back up to the skyline before tourists could mob him. He practically flew over the city, and something- a mix of a laugh and a cry- was ripped from his throat. It wasn't loud, luckily.
Or a pause in a walk in the woods… quiet…
His own powerlessness hurt a bit less, when he was flying. He didn't feel powerless. He didn't have to constantly be strategizing and fighting and working and failing and being wrong and never being good enough… he didn't have to be Felix Agreste, the 'other' twin, the antisocial, angry one, always second best. He could be Chat Noir, hero of Paris, who always saveed the day. Those were his thoughts as he perched on the roof of a building.
Like silence, but not really silence… just that nice kind of quiet, like the sound when you lie upside down in your bed.
"Are you okay?"
He turned, and there she was… Ladybug. His Ladybug, that is, the one with the long hair and almost constant smirk, not his brother's sugar-sweet, innocent paramour.
"I'm getting there," he said, speaking softly.
She sat beside him, arms crossed. "I saw you were out. You passed my window. Is there an akuma out?"
"No, I just had to get away from my dad for a while," he shrugged. "Sorry to worry you, love."
"Don't call me that," she complained, but the annoyance that usually filled her tone was gone, replaced with light amusement.
Just the sound of your heart in your head.
He leaned back, looking up to the stars. "I don't think I can really go back. I mean, I will, but at the same time… is it okay to pretend not to care, to survive?"
"I think so," she said. "I think if you have to survive, it's okay to do whatever you have to."
And though the people around me, their mouths are still moving… the words they are forming cannot reach me anymore.
He took her hand in his own, and for once, she didn't move away.
"I'm not blind like my brother, you know."
"I doubt you're blind either."
She laughed lightly. "Well, I was for a long time."
And it is quiet.
He sat up. "I have to go."
She nodded. "My parents won't like it if I'm gone when they check."
They parted, but each had a small grin on their face.
And I am warm.
He slipped onto his balcony, and de-transformed. For once, Plagg simply left him alone, at peace.
"Felix!" Adrien ran up to him. "Thank you."
Felix's eyes widened. "What?"
"Father didn't yell at me half as much as usual. I think… I think he respects what you tried to do… and thanks."
Maybe Felix wasn't so powerless after all.
Like I've sailed into the eye of the storm.