Shigatsu wa Watashi no Shinjitsu
My Truth in April
Chapter 0 : Prologue - Spring Storm
Dum dam da! Da da dum dum!
The sound of the piano echo through the hall. Everyone were moved from his performance.
Chopin's Ballade no.1 in G minor, Op. 23.
This Ballade was created by Chopin in his sorrow and loneliness during a war. Indeed this is very fitting for Arima's state right now.
All of this was channeled to his performances. Anyone who watch and hear his performance can see, how Arima was a mirror image to Chopin right now.
What a beautiful sound.
This is beautiful Arima-sensei.
You're bursting with color!
One could say that if he keep performing at this level, he will surely win the competition for sure.
But they don't know, what's going on in his head right now.
I play with all my might, every feeling I had was poured to my playing. I play for everyone who made my life fuller, they are watching me. I can't let them down.
DUM dam da! Da da dum dum!
This is the sound mom gave me.
The sound Tsubaki and Watari found for me.
The sound that everyone create for me.
However, in the top of my mind, there is you, Miyazono Kaori.
You dragged me to music again. You gave me color to my monochrome world. You forcibly make me face my past. You push me to dream again.
It's all your fault.
Now if I remember everything I do, whatever I did, all of it rooted back to you. Your happiness and sorrow, your hope and despair, all of them make me playing again on stage. Every single pieces, every single notes, every single keys I play, it's remind me of you.
Don't leave me alone.
No way I'm gonna leave you alone.
Reach her! Reach her!
I'm giving on everything I have!
Reach her! Reach her! Reach her! REACH HER!
Just kick your illness to the curb!
And then, one more time we'll...
As I pound everything to my play, snow began falling. I wonder where all of this snow come from? They are not heavy or hinder my playing. Just like when I carry you to the rooftop, so light and fragile like a snow.
The scenery began to change. As the sky look as clear as sea, you begin appearing in my mind. You happily ready your violin, smiling at me brightly.
You start playing the violin version of the Chopin, beautifully.
The sound of the violin echo in my mind. It was very well mixed with my piano performance. It was actually very weird, as you are never train with me to play this Chopin or even you do, this piece is used for solo performance. Yet right now we were like the greatest duo ever setting foot on stage.
Is this what you mean to play with me on stage again!?
Oi, oi! Aren't you dream to waltzing with me again!?
Kaori had given up and stopped believing in herself, but thanks to you she get up again.
Your devotion was what struck Kaori a chord in her heart.
It's what your parents tell me a lie!? Aren't you supposed to get up again!?
You kept playing the violin, perfectly. Like you give everything all you got, body and soul for your last performance.
We're good at struggling!
We risk our life to struggle because we're musician, remember?
Liar, you just give up right now!
Miracle can happen!
Liar, right now you stop believing in it!
You exist inside me!
If you want to exist, then play with me in real stage! Stop messing around with my head! This is so pathetic! You're pathetic! After all the mess you did to me, now you want to run away? Take responsibility! You're not my mom, you're exist beside me!
That's right, you're not my mom.
Even both of you are sickly, you have different disease from my mom.
Even both of you are moody, you are like rollercoaster unlike my mom.
Even both of you are violent, you are like rain- as opposed to my mom's thunder.
You like sweets, my mom never ate Watari's candies.
You are Tsubaki's best friend, my mom occasionally yell at her.
You love cat, my mom throw Chelsea away.
And most of all, I in love with you.
DUM DANG DANG !
Rage are filled in my mind. Anger, my anger for you, my anger for the liar that want to bribe me with cheap, magical performance. As I rage, my playing start getting stronger, more emotional, more harsh than before.
You look surprised, the troubled expression in your face write it all. It like you tell me that "this is not how it was supposed to be!"
So, if parting what you want. I will deny it!
That's right, you said I'm a sadist? Then I will deny everything you did right now!
I will keep to deny it!
DUM DANG DANG !
The harsh echo vibrate in the air. Indeed, calling it a "sound" was like an insult to music itself. It was so bad and loud that the most accurate description for it is a high pitched frequencies of vibration one after another.
"What is this!?" The judges shocked.
"Arima... your playing... transforming again!?" Aiza Takeshi watching in the waiting room, clinching his teeth.
"This color... aren't the colorful sound like before! Arima-Sensei!" Aiza Nagi confused, unable to enjoy his performance.
"Red, red and red. All the color you produce, are colored in red, Arima!" Igawa Emi trying to perceive his playing.
DUM DANG DANG !
"So, this is your answer, Kousei? This Ballade, are tainted in anger for someone!" Hiroko Seto crying and laughing, for whatever reason. "Indeed, you became a weird pianist, Kousei!"
"Kousei...!" Tsubaki look worried.
"Kousei..." Watari too.
"..." Everyone start dumbfounded to sudden change in Arima playing. It's only natural, after all Arima did well in the prelims.
Indeed, everyone have mixed opinion. But that was not in Arima Kousei worries right now. Right now he was fighting in an ultimate battle to determine his future.
"Watari?" The two girls confused.
"Kousei need our help." It was an unusual sight for the two girls that the goofy lady-killer Watari look so determined.
DUM DANG DANG !
As I started to deny you, I pound the key harshly, angrily. I'm not even care to my performance anymore. You start unable to keep with my fast paced and strong playing. Whenever you start balanced your pace to mine, I will go faster! Until you can't keep up with me anymore!
DUM DANG DANG !
She visibly look troubled. All her notes start scrambling uncontrollably. As she was dropping in sweat, I continue increase my pace.
How is that? Miyazono Kaori? All the time you always in the spotlight. How was it to feel pathetic? How was it to look incompetent? Aren't it frustrate you? Then come! If this your final memory you want to leave inside me, then I will taint it!
This is Arima Kousei you talking about! I'm the guy that touch piano since childhood, I'm the prodigy that everyone look into!
Indeed, right now I'll give everything in my disposal to deny you. Whatever it was my skill, ability, or fame! I'll deny you!
Don't you dare.
Don't you dare you betray our promise!
"ANSWER ME! MIYAZONO KAORI!"
"How dare you..."
"How dare you to mock this stage again!? Arima Kousei!" One of the judge, shout out in anger.
Indeed, what I did are unforgivable. Not only I play badly, I'm shouting during my play. That is very disrespectful.
No one even applause.
As I search for my friends, they already gone. I really play that badly huh? Even my friends can't stand to watch it.
But right now, the only applause... the only acknowledgement I want to... are from you, Miyazono Kaori.
I'm started to get up, rushing. I'm not even bow to audience.
"Wait, where are you going!?"
Ahh... that just pile up another disrespectful thing I did in this stage again. I'm not even surprised anymore if I get banned after this.
I rush past the waiting room, right now there is another thing that I need to do.
"Arima-! Oi where are you going!" That was Aiza and Igawa-san, I think they want to say something. I'm not even bothered to answer them.
"..." I can't see what kind of expression that Igawa-san make.
"Arima... Again, What's with your sudden emotion burst all of a sudden?" But I know Aiza make another disappointed look.
As I reach the outside of the hall, I meet them.
They were already waiting me in the outside. Both Watari, Tsubaki and even Kawaguchi-san.
"Hop in! Kousei!" Watari ready his motorcycle.
It seems they had been rushing too. I can see Tsubaki drenching in sweat as she gave me a helmet.
"Beat her to the crap! Kousei!" Tsubaki and Kawaguchi-san, encouraging me.
Ahh… What some reliable friends you guys are. I'm ashamed that I even doubt you guys slightly.
Even during performance, you guys keep considering my feeling. Now if I'm thinking about it, every time I reach a dead end, you guys are the one who support me to get up.
During I lost Chelsea.
During my mom's death.
During 2 years I can't play piano.
During my worry to Kaori illness.
You two always there, to support me, to get me up.
"Yeah! I will!"
"Get ready, Kousei! Because right now I will ride this fast and furious!"
"Right- Wait, aren't you need license for this- WHOOOOAAAA!" Watari, without concern to my worry. Just accelerate like he is a pro biker.
"Off they go..."
"Tsubaki... is that okay? Letting your rival like that?"
"Nope... This time, I will let her. Even if I don't, right now all in Kousei mind... just Kao-chan."
"I suppose... you are right..."
Just you wait.
I will not let you go, after all of this!
Totsuhara University Hospital.
As I rushed to the hospital, I meet Kaori's parents in front of the operation room. It was in the norm- no it was a general rule to not running in a hospital. Before I come, I was arguing with a nurse because she refuse to tell me where her operation being held, after all I'm not a family member. Normally they don't allow non family member visit during a surgery, but it seems the nurse gave up arguing and just let me as an exception, as Watari still stuck with her.
"Kaori- our dear Kaori was...!"
I could tell. From their cry, from their look, the operation was not looking good. They already did a good job, after this time they praying and not losing hope for her. It seems they already reach their limit.
I peek from the windowed door. Actually the window are designed to be unable to peek inside, even if I can peek there is definitely a curtain shrouded the operation table. However...
I just barged in. It might be a miracle. After all, it supposed to be locked. To prevent crazy bargainer like me to get inside.
"Defibrillator ready, all clear!"
"1... 2... 3...!"
"Patient's respiratory rate keep dropping down!"
"Still going down!"
It was disastrous. The doctor and nurses doing their best to keep Kaori alive, but she keep going down.
This must be a lie.
I can see it clear in my eyes your condition getting down and down.
As I stand frozen, one of the nurse notice me.
"Hey- how did you get in!" The nurse want to shove me outside as I'm distracting them, soon all the other nurses and doctor start notice my presence. Some of them start to drag me outside.
"Don't screw with me! Kaori!"
Whether you're sad, you're a mess, or you've hit rock bottom, you still have to play! That's how people like us survive!
"You told me to never gave up!"
That's right, Miyazono Kaori is a strong girl that will never gave up.
Look at me. Look up and look at me. you're always looking down. That's why you're imprisoned inside that cage of music scores.
"You're the one who told me to look up!"
Miyazono Kaori is a cheerful girl that always face anything head on.
I hereby appoint Friend A as my accompanist.
"You're the one who told me to come back to stage again!"
Miyazono Kaori is a forceful girl that will never stop to get what she want.
Maybe there's only a dark road up ahead. But you still have to believe and keep going. Believe that the stars will light your path, even a little bit.
"Then face it! Believe it! If there is no light to illuminate your path, I will be your star!"
I deny it. I deny this yourself who easily gave up!
"DO YOU THINK YOU BE ABLE TO FORGET? KAORI!?"
As I said that, some of the nurses drag me outside the operation room. Indeed, no matter whatever the reason letting another person shouting and watching inside a surgery operation is totally unthinkable.
"That boy... until the end still have the faith for Miyazono-san to survive. You're a lucky girl... for there is such person to love you to this extend." It was the person who look like the lead doctor said so.
However, as he said that, he notice Kaori's finger move slightly.
"Doctor! Her pulse!" One of the nurse, confirm from the monitor.
It's a miracle. After all she already lose her pulse after a few minutes.
In case like hypothermia, a person might able to survive even after 10-20 minutes her heart stop beating.
But that was not the case for Kaori.
In the first place, Kaori sickness aren't that simple. She herself struck with many diseases. One of them are Bone Marrow Disease, a very deadly illness that slowly crumble a person body.
However whatever a coincidence or 1 of 1000 case, the doctor start to had faith again.
"I know! Defibrillator ready, all clear!"
Looking at such youthful spirits like him, make me look pathetic. Does not I became a doctor to save lives? Since when I'm started to easily gave up a patient. Arima-kun was it? For such miracle happen in front of my eyes. I will not let this one down!
After that, the doctor and nurses keep doing their best. A few minutes since I'm dragged out. I heard a loud cheers from the operation room.
Prologue - End
Hello! I'm Feelism! Yup, there is my introduction! Let's just talk about this chapter aren't we! Because introduction are boring!
As you can see, this is not the chapter 1 that gonna start the story. If you guys watch Fate/Stay Night : Unlimited Blade Work (2014), there is an "Episode 0" where the main character are not the actual main protagonist. This is the same case. This chapter is serve as a bridge to the main storyline and the end of Arima Kousei's story aka Your Lie in April.
"Wait are not we read Your Lie in April fanfic?! How do you mean it's an end to Kousei's story?" Ta-da! Good question. Actually this is gonna be the story of the fresh new life of Miyazono Kaori! What will she found and stumble into in her fresh new life? What consequences did she bring after her thoughtless way of life? That's gonna be the main theme! And no, Kousei still gonna be the main character. Don't worry!
As this chapter, the theme are "denial". It was created to be the opposite of the final episode/chapter "acceptance". It also supposed to be an embodiment of the broken heart fan base. (Just kidding!)
Until next time! See ya!