20Author's Note: Hi everyone! So excited to be back on this website and inspired to write again. I've been very heartbroken lately so I've been diving back into the InuYasha fandom, which was been a source of comfort for me. I've been rewatching a lot of the episodes, and I got to the one where Kagome's soul was absorbed into Kanna's mirror, and I realized that her soul had been stolen on two occasions – first by Urasue, and then by Kanna. I wondered what the psychological implications of that sort of experience would be.
I wrote this story in honour of InuKag week! I adore InuYasha and Kagome. Always have, always will! I've been a fan of InuYasha since I was in grade four! So like…. 2003? Sheesh, over ten years. Since 2003. That's how long I've been shipping InuKag.
- - - Soul Came Out of the Mirror - - -
It had been four days since Kagome had returned to the Sengoku Jidai. It had all been a blur. The days had been going at lightning speed, yet in slow motion all at once. Inuyasha and Kagome were watching the sunset near the hut they were staying in, on a hill. Kagome had said that one of the things she'd missed most about this era (other than Inuyasha and the crew) was the night sky. So the couple walked over to a patch of soft grass, and sat to watch the sun go down.
Inuyasha couldn't believe that only four days ago, he had been living in constant longing. He had gone from a permanent state of heartbroken, to bursting with gratitude for being alive. He had gone from going about his normal day, as he had every day for the three years after he lost Kagome. He had been losing hope and feeling as though his future was empty and black. To thinking that maybe, juuust maybe, he thought he caught Kagome's scent. And then, a half second later, he knew for sure that something with Kagome's scent was coming. From the direction of the Bone-Eater's Well. Could it possibly be…?
From running, and in that moment being a little too frightened to get his hopes up. Too frightened that maybe, this was too good to be true and it would hurt if it wasn't her.
From getting closer and closer to the well, as it sped up to meet him… there she was.
It was her.
Kagome.
Before he knew it, she was holding his hand. Gazing into his eyes. And he felt like the happiest thing that could have happened to him had just happened, after a life of denial, sorrow, and loss. Kagome had returned to him.
Kagome had returned.
She gazed into Inuyasha's eyes.
This experience was nothing short of ineffable.
That day was just as perfect for Kagome.
She remembered walking home from lunch, a celebratory get-together with some close friends after finally graduating from high school. Kagome had actually done quite well in school, once she stopped missing classes from going back and forth from the Sengoku Jidai. In fact, after battling demons, countless deaths, nights sleeping on the cold hard ground, so many injuries, being afraid of losing Inuyasha, and then losing him… well, after all that, she felt like she could conquer anything.
After all, a couple tests couldn't kill her. The worst thing that could've ever happened to her had already happened.
So it was as the summer had just begun, and she was walking home and wondering what she was going to do with her life. She was thinking about him, about Inuyasha, and putting the thought out of her mind because it hurt to miss him. It had been three years, and the ache of missing him had never gone away.
Sure, the pain had subsided just a little. But the longing never disappeared. It was there when she woke up. It was there when she was laughing with her friends. It was there when she was studying, and it was there when she was at the gym. Accompanied by that longing was this horrid sorrow that had taken root and simply anchored itself into her chest.
Sometimes the pain wasn't so palpable, because she managed to move on and enjoy many things in her life. Kagome cherished her health, the easier lifestyle of the 20th century, warm baths, her mother's cooking, and watching Souta grow. Those were things she ached for when she was knocking elbows with death every so often in the Sengoku Jidai.
But despite that, the underlying feeling was the longing she felt for Inuyasha. She had never found love since him. Sure, she'd looked for it, but she'd just given up trying. All the men she dated just couldn't measure up to the man who had on countless occasions risked his life for her, and took honour in doing so.
So finally, after three years of hoping, Kagome and Inuyasha were together. It was like the earth had moved and the stars had shifted, specifically for them, so they could be together. They felt immense gratitude for being alive, for having endured so much heartache and pain, just so they could exist in this one moment, watching the sunset. They had no regrets about the sorrow they had battled in the past, because it brought them to this idyllic present, and hopeful future.
Neither of the two were exactly sure of what was coming next. But they knew they would be okay, so long as they could have more moments like these.
Kagome and Inuyasha were sitting on a hill, watching the purples, oranges, and reds in a dim sky. Kagome had missed the literally pastoral sunsets of this era. Kagome was always in awe of the night sky in the Sengoku Jidai. She was lying against Inuyasha's shoulder. He felt so sturdy, yet soft, to lean against. Inuyasha had his arms around her, and he would affectionately massage the nape of her neck with his left hand intermittently. He had been more touchey-feely since they'd reunited. Kagome was glad; she had spent those three years thinking about all the things she wished she could've done with Inuyasha. She spent those years regretting the fact that she didn't cherish the time they had together.
The two had had an incredible reunion. They almost didn't speak, but hadn't let each other out of their sights for the past four days. Kagome and Inuyasha had shared a hut, much to the tsking of Priestess Kaede. Though no one thought too much of it – most of the villagers assumed Kagome and Inuyasha had wed long before the defeat of Naraku.
Both Inuyasha and Kagome knew they were meant for each other. They were born for each other. So they didn't speak much. They hadn't even gotten far past intimate snuggling and passionate kisses. The furthest they'd gone was Inuyasha slipping his hand under her shirt a little bit.
That had happened on their second night together. Kagome had been trying to get to sleep. She was still exhausted from the "jetlag," which she assumed was probably the result of travelling several centuries back in time in the span of a few seconds.
She had a major time-change adjustment to make.
Inuyasha and Kagome were spooning, and he wouldn't stop touching her. Not that she minded much. She closed her eyes and enjoyed her lover's affectionate hands. But she did start to find her body waking up in certain places, as his stroking began to playfully sneak under her pyjamas. As Inuyasha slipped a hand under her shirt – just around the belly button, just so his skin could touch hers – he felt Kagome shift her body. Very slowly, she ever-so-slightly lowered her body, so Inuyasha's hand moved a little higher up.
Could she be… Inuyasha thought, allowing me to…?
Before Inuyasha could realize what she was doing, she guided his left hand to touch her bare breast, underneath her shirt.
Inuyasha's ears twitched curiously as he began to feel Kagome's softness. He lightly pinched her nipple, which had become quite hard. He smiled and pressed his lips against her neck, then gave her ear a light nibble. Kagome let out a breathy laugh, then a sigh.
"This feels nice," she whispered. Inuyasha's ears twitched again, and he blushed a little. But he could also feel his member growing slightly as Kagome squirmed against him.
As if Kagome sensed that it was starting to get a little too sexual, she stopped squirming and pulled his hand out from under her shirt. Kagome turned to look at Inuyasha. She lay on her back as he gazed at her. There was a lot of starlight in the cabin, that seemed to highlight the most beautiful features of Kagome's face. She put one hand on his cheek, and then her other hand on his other cheek. She pulled him towards her for a deep kiss.
Kagome had kissed guys in high school. She found herself at a party now and again, drinking a beer and laughing with her friends. It was nice to be around friends, especially because she would get lonely from time to time. After all, Kagome had basically lost her world. At least, one of her worlds.
Boys would approach Kagome and sometimes she would go on dates. She'd only become more gorgeous as she'd aged. She lost some of her knobby features, and (this especially Inuyasha didn't mind) had gotten curvier hips. With the boys she had seen in high school, there would be some kisses, some laughs, some more dates, and maybe some under-the-shirt action. But Kagome could never commit. The boys she'd kissed had never measured up to this impossible standard.
It was an impossible yet simple standard; she needed to feel the way she felt when she was with Inuyasha.
Inuyasha and Kagome kissed for a little bit longer, but neither of them wanted to rush into anything more. It was nice to have some fun things to look forward to in the future, for once.
That had been two days after Kagome had returned. And now it was day four. Inuyasha wondered how many more days he would get with Kagome. He hoped for every day. The sun had almost disappeared into the west, and the sky was filled with even more colours than before. The sunset battled against Kagome for the spot of "most beautiful thing in sight." And the sunset was losing.
"Kagome?" Inuyasha asked her, breaking the silence.
She stiffened a little bit. The two hadn't had many serious conversations. It had mostly been "I miss you's" and some catching up. Kagome told Inuyasha about high school, and her family. Inuyasha told her about Shippou, Miroku and Sango, the couple's three children, Kaede, and life in the village. She knew a more serious conversation was coming, but she felt it was time to discuss the more serious topics that needed addressing.
"Kagome, I want to tell you something. I want you to know how much I missed you, and how happy I am to have you back." Inuyasha paused. Kagome was starting to worry a little. Is this going to end with a "but?" She thought nervously.
"I… I want you to stay here Kagome," Inuyasha stuttered out. He wanted her to stay so badly. These past four days had been the best blur of his life. He wanted the blur to slow. He wanted it to become his life forever.
"Inuyasha…" Kagome said. She took a second, and then a deep breath. "I want to be with you."
She didn't know what exactly to do. Was she stuck in the Sengoku Jidai? Would she ever see her family again? Kagome knew that she wanted to be with Inuyasha though. If the well was suddenly going to open up again, she wasn't sure if she'd go through it, but she knew she would only go if Inuyasha would come with her. Being with him felt right.
And she loved feeling right.
"Can I tell you how it feels to be back here, with you?" Kagome asked. "I just found a way to put it into words."
Inuyasha nodded. "Yeah."
"Remember back when we were battling Kanna and Kagura for the first time?" Kagome asked.
Inuyasha did remember. That night had been as dark as it was on this night, but Inuyasha couldn't remember if it had actually been dark, or if his memory had simply painted it that way. He had almost died that night, when the wind scar deflected off Kanna's mirror and hit him almost straight on. And Kagome… he thought Kagome had died. He thought he had lost her, had failed to protect another woman who had been kind to him.
"Yeah," Inuyasha said, stiffening a little at the hard memory. He pulled Kagome a little closer, even more grateful that she was alive by his side, and in his arms after three years.
"I had my soul sucked out of me, Inuyasha. It was almost gone from my body. I still had a little bit left. But it was an awful feeling. I could barely move after," Kagome said. "That was the second time that happened to me. Remember when Kikyo was resurrected?"
Inuyasha didn't think there would be a day when he wouldn't remember the sight of the woman who he thought he'd loved, who had killed him, rising from the dead.
"I lost part of my soul that day too," she said softly. "Twice, I've had part of my soul stolen from me."
Inuyasha had never considered this. Kagome always bounced back from her battles so quickly. And she'd never talked about having her soul sucked out, though Inuyasha could only imagine how awful it would feel to lose such an intimate part of oneself.
"I felt… violated. I felt empty. And days after the experience, I still felt a little shaky. Twice Inuyasha… I've had my soul sucked out of me twice."
The two were quiet. Inuyasha didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to comfort her. He felt shame for not protecting her better.
"It was always returned though. I got my soul back, both those times. The feeling of having my soul whole again: that is a familiar feeling to me now." Kagome was beginning to have that hopeful tinge in her voice again. "I've now had my soul returned to me three times. Reuniting with you, Inuyasha, feels like my soul has come together once again."
Inuyasha was amazed at Kagome's description. Because not only was it an incredible feeling to hear such words leave the mouth of the woman he loved, but because he had been feeling the exact same way, but didn't know how to describe it.
"It's that feeling of when my soul came out of the mirror, and burst back into my body. That's how I feel. Like when my soul came out of the mirror. Back into me. Back where it belonged." Kagome stopped talking. She started to laugh. She realized she'd made a bit of a double-entendre. Inuyasha had noticed, but he didn't want to say anything so as not to embarrass her. But when she started to laugh, so did he.
Being with her felt like his soul had come out of the mirror. That was the perfect way to describe it.
Alright! I had fun writing that! Hope you guys enjoyed it! I'm not sure if I'm going to leave this as a oneshot… I'm kind of interested in authoring Inu/Kag's first time (though there's tons of that on here… but I can't get enough :3 )
Happy InuKag Week!