Don't Own AHS
A/N: Well, it finally happened. Surprise, guys!
"No more death." She said, grasping the abortionist's hand from between her legs. In that moment, she realized the decision she had made was final. No one would die that day. Not even the unborn child growing within her like a disease.
Lana Winters had lost enough. She wasn't ready to lose more, not in that way.
She left the woman's apartment in a hurry; her face streamed with tears but with a sense of relief that not even she understood. Her hand was placed upon her stomach as if protecting the little bulge that had formed over the past few weeks since she had left Briarcliff for good.
Terror ran through her mind as she hurried down the stairwell of the old building afraid that her demons would chase after her and drag her back to that filthy bed. She burst out through the wooden doors out onto the streets of Boston and inhaled the city air. When she exhaled, she felt a heavy pressure relieve itself from her chest. She was out of the mouth of wolves and now out into the world where she had to face her reality and come to terms with her decision.
Lana wrapped her trench coat tightly around her, shielding her body from view as if someone would recognize her and know what she had been doing in that building. It filled her with a shame she had never felt before— not even when she came out to her parents as a lesbian.
Lana hailed a cab and as soon as one pulled over, she climbed right in.
Wiping away her tears, Lana forced the lump in her throat back as she told the cab driver where to go. He noticed her terrified expression but didn't question it and drove through the streets on route to her destination.
"No more death." Lana's words played in her mind like a prayer on repetition.
No more death.
Lana was sick of it. She couldn't stand the thought of it. Then she came to mind. How was Lana going to face her? How was she going to tell her that she had been weak? How was she going to make up for bringing Bloody Face's child into the world? Those were questions she had no answers to.
The door to the cab slammed shut and the driver sped off. Lana now stood in front of a quaint one-story house she had come to know so well over the last few years of her life. The weather had become overcast and she felt it to be a reflection of the mockery the cosmos were bestowing down upon her. The joke was never ending.
Lana took in a deep breath, inhaling in the scent of rain. How was she going to tell her?
She took one step forward and made her way up to the porch. She reached into her purse but couldn't find her keys. Her hand shook when she raised her fist, pounding it against the door frantically, eager to go inside. When there wasn't an answer right away, Lana knocked harder.
"Coming!" Her sweet voice came from the other side of the door and Lana's heart broke.
When the door opened, Lana looked her straight in the eyes. She opened her mouth to speak but no words came out; only tears.
"I couldn't." Lana breathed, letting out all of her failures, "Wendy, I couldn't do it."
Wendy Peyser looked at her lover in shambles and took her by the hand, "Come inside." She closed the door behind them, careful that the neighbors weren't looking and in the privacy of their home, Lana cried out loud.
Wendy held her, close, "Tell me, Lana. What happened?" She then led Lana to the living room and they both sat upon the sofa.
Lana met her eyes, "I'm so sorry, Wendy. I couldn't end it. I just couldn't."
A look of both sadness and relief crossed Wendy's brown eyes and she gave out a soft sigh. She took Lana's hands into her own and kissed them gently. "You know I will support any decision you make. Even this one."
"Wendy, it's just for a few months longer and then our lives will go back to the way they were." Lana let go of Wendy's hands and cupped her face in them, "It won't be forever."
Wendy smiled sheepishly at Lana's desperation to return to their old lives. "Nothing will ever be the same, you know that."
"I don't want this thing inside of me."
Wendy saddened at the way Lana spoke of the child growing in her womb. Instead of fighting her, she kissed her hand again, "What are you going to do?"
"Give it up." Lana averted her gaze, "I can't raise it. I just can't be a mother to Bloody Face's child…"
A sense of sadness filled Wendy's features but she forced a smile for the woman she loved, "You're not alone in this, Lana. Whatever happens, I'm here with you. I love you."
Lana smiled and hugged her, "I love you more."