I know it has been over three years since this story was updated, but in order to make to a YouTube video detailing this what-if scenario I knew that I would need a plot to go off of. This story being stuck in my head for the past few years has eventually led me to this point, and while this is NOT a promise to finish this story, this shall be a temporary return. When I initially published this story, I was a teenager in middle-to-high school trying to appeal to the masses. In hindsight, many of my plot devices and decisions were derived off of other great stories in an attempt to come up with the best story possible.

As a freshly-minted grown man in society nowadays, I do not have the time nor patience to revise the older chapters in order to fit my more logic-based vision as to how this story should ultimately play out. Maybe whenever I get to the endgame of this story I will find the time to line everything up from start to finish, but as of this writing I simply cannot be bothered. As my power levels have increased physically, mentally, and emotionally, I can recognize the stark contrast between an epic tale and a poorly written one. While I do not believe I was ever a bad writer in any event, I do acknowledge that my emotions bled into the story, which made characters such as Goku and Hinata stray away from their characters to the point that they are essentially OCs. Naruto being a redhead and a 'smart genius' made absolutely zero sense. Sasuke being amicable with others upon the Uchiha massacre, and also receiving the Mangekyou is an illogical mistake. Kurotsuchi even being relevant in the story at this point would not logically make sense, Haku being alive and a female was simply a plot device to give Sasuke a different pairing. Karin being relevant in the Forest of Death is only a greater hassle for me as the author to write in, and it simply would not flow. Yugao being the sensei because of her time as an Anbu member watching over Goku as a child is not realistic given the nature of being an Anbu member to begin with. You do not typically leave.

On top of that, a four man team was lazy writing on my part. Instead of switching up the team dynamics from canon, it would have been more sound to simply have Goku act as his own sort of free agent rather than have him linked to a team. That way the strategic employment of a tracking, assault, and interrogation squad would have remained the same. And as we all know, Goku has the potential to function in all three sects by his lonesome.

In all honesty, the whole plot-line was a conglomerate of other works remixed and remastered to a degree that I could somewhat claim it as my own story. The silver-lining to all of this is that I am a far stronger person than I was at 13 when I published this story, and while the emphasis on the journeys of anyone not named Son Goku will inevitably decrease, the story should sober up and hopefully end up being that much greater.

After all, the Super Saiyan is the ultimate equalizer.

Chapter 0: Zeno's Retcon

"A world like this..."

Two child-like blue hands rose in the sky, coating themselves with an unknown level of energy.

"Must disappear!"

And then, the entire Ludicrous Shinobi timeline was erased.

"We must retcon it immediately."

"As you command, Lord Zeno," an angelic figure with white hair, pale blue skin, lavender eyes, a turquoise gi with an orange triangular symbol, a luminescent halo, a red belt with a golden Zeno emblem in the center, and white boots with grey tips.

With a wave of his right hand, the Grand Priest reinstated the previously erased universe with the specific modifications meant to appease the Omni-King. Nobody likes a bad TV show after all, and to someone as powerful as Zeno, entertainment happens to be overwhelmingly important in his day-to-day life.

Entertainment was everything.

The timeline as it was had deviated too far away from what originally would have happened, and as such the story became hard to watch. It needed a change of pace.

In an event not too dissimilar to DC's retcon punch by Superboy Prime, the timeline of The Ludicrous Shinobi had shifted.

For better or worse, only time will tell.

For all of those people who've wanted to see my original story again... then here it is!

This will be my second attempt at my first DBZ/Naruto (the original) story!


Ki is not Chakra and vice versa, but at their core both of them are energy sources.

Ki (気 "Ki", lit. "Spirit"), also known as chi/qi, Yōki (妖気) or simply energy (エネルギー enerugī), is the life force energy of all living things. It is composed to these components as verbatim stated by Akira Toriyama: Genki (元気 lit. "Vigor"), Yūki (勇気 lit. "Courage"), and Shōki (正気 lit. "Mind"). Chakra (チャクラ, chakura) is the combination of two types of energy, Spiritual energy and Physical energy, which is granted only by the chakra fruits of the Otsutsuki.

Chapter 1: Son Goku

The mountains of Paozu were some of the best places for meditation. An older man sat down on the cliff with his eyes closed, simply becoming one with nature; breathing calmly, and getting rid of the troubles on his mind.

He continued his deep meditation, letting his energy flow freely.

Behind him, there was a small hut, which he identified as his home. He was walking to go inside, but as he was about to slide open the door; he heard a loud crash. He turned around, seeing that not too far from his house; there was a giant plume of smoke.

And then what followed was the appearance of a Ki signature he couldn't identify.

It seemed the newcomer would be the only other Ki user besides Muten Roshi, the Ox King, the Crane school students, a few scattered monk settlements, and himself in the world.

Acting within his nature as a turtle school ambassador, the elder statesmen was inclined to go and investigate.

Running, he quickly turned his attention to the metal pod. The man was more than confused as to what was going on. It was silver, with a small red-ish window in the front of it. He walked up to it and tapped it with his foot gently, and surprisingly it opened.

His eyes widened behind and he gasped once he saw what was on the inside. He took a step closer to get a better look.

It was a baby! It was no normal baby, but a baby nonetheless. It cried and held its arms out for help like any other child, and the man had no choice but to help the baby out of the pod.

It was a boy, and the man found that out the hard way because he peed directly on his face. The baby started laughing and the man couldn't even be mad. He ran a hand through the boy's spiky black hair and almost smiled.

"Hey there kiddo," he greeted the child.

His eyes widened once he realized the almost "alien" nature of the Ki that belonged to the child, "Wow, you're different."

Through all this he didn't notice that a tail wrapped around his arm while he held the child, "You're a weird one too aren't you!"

He laughed a bit to himself, before tickling the kid on his stomach and looking past everything weird about him, understanding he was still a baby. "My name is Gohan! What's yours?"

He knew he wouldn't be getting any real response, just a confused stare. Gohan still smiled.

"I'll call you…Goku," He said as he looked at the boy's tail, "It seems fitting anyway."

The baby, now known as Goku, giggled with glee and happiness.

- Seven Years Later -

Gohan ducked as the young boy in front of him threw another punch at his head.

"Not quite strong enough to hit me yet Goku," he told the boy as he sent a punch at the boy.

The Saiyan deftly dodged the attack and countered with a round house kick. The older martial artist promptly caught the boy's leg and used Goku's own momentum to his advantage, sending the boy flying off into the bushes.

The child arose from the bushes and dusted off his blue martial arts uniform. "No fair," the boy said with a slightly somber tone. "I still can't hit you."

"You've only been training with me for a few years now," Gohan replied with the name, kind-hearted smile. "You'll improve with time. And I've been training my whole life. You can't expect to get results like that overnight."

"Grandpa," Goku started. "Is everyone as strong as you are?"

"No," Gohan replied. "Many people aren't even as strong as you are now. I've been studying martial arts for my entire life to gain the amount of strength that I have. But don't be discouraged that you're not winning. It takes time to be the best, but eventually I know that you will surpass me."

"Really?!" The child asked, excitement manifesting on the boy.

The elderly man chuckled, nodding in confirmation.

Over the past seven years since the untimely arrival of the boy from the stars, their lives of isolation in the wilderness known as Mount Paozu had been incredulous to say the least. In the first two years of their time together, Goku was as wild and aggressive as a toddler could possibly be. While the child not far removed from infancy posed zero threat to his personal safety, the intent to kill never subsided unless there was food to eat.

House repairs, great apes, broken dishes, ravaged clothes, Goku did it all. And then one day, on an accident that he still could not fathom actually occurred, the boy from the stars fell fifty feet into a ravine...

Bumping his head. Ouch.

Thanking Kami that his surrogate grandchild happened to survive the fall, Gohan was able to nurse the boy back to optimal health after a week of bed riddance. Upon the child's reawakening, his behavior and nature completely reversed itself and the boy was as pure of heart as anything he had ever seen.

In the years following the amnesiac shift in Goku's character, the senior martial artist trained the prodigal child in a manner similar to the way of the turtle hermit. The boy, enthused to fight and become stronger more than anything else, soaked up every movement like a sponge. It was ludicrous.

Whether or not he lived to see it, he knew that his adopted grandson would one day become the most powerful fighter under the heavens. It was written.

Gohan smiled in his thoughts, perhaps for the last time...

And just like that, the day had gone by in the blink of an eye, and Goku didn't go to bed, seeing the moon.

"Man the moon sure is pretty tonight. I wonder why Grandpa never let me stay up to see it when it was full like this," the boy said to himself.

Before the words were out of his mouth, Goku lurched back uncontrollably as his body began to spasm. His eyes turned bright red and canine teeth soon grew from his mouth. The front of the boy's face began to pull outward into a long snout. Brown hair grew all over Goku's body as his clothes were ripped to shreds by his rapidly growing body. Within seconds, the unwanted transformation into his Oozaru form was complete.

This would be the second turning point in the life of Son Goku.

- In The Aftermath -

The Sandaime looked at the seven-year old with apprehension.

With sheer luck he had been able to distract the Oozaru with his monkey summons to allow Hatake Kakashi a chance to cut the apes tail off. It had succeeded, turning the great ape back into the seven-year old he is. After breaching the village walls which were still in the process of rehabilitation from the Kyuubi like nothing, and then destroying a whole sector of the village. In what could only unarguably be the most random, sudden siege in the history of Konohagakure.

Many were in outrage. They clamored for the boy's execution.

However, the Sandaime being the kind man as always, protected the boy from the council and made the debacle an SS-ranked secret.

Having a Yamanaka check his memories didn't help, as they were blank. The brat remained an enigma to him even to this moment, and he examined him. He seemed below-average in height and weight compared to everyone else his age.

To any onlooker, many would think he was the Yonbi, Son Goku in full transformation. However, the boy didn't have a seal mark anywhere on his body and had previously possessed a tail before it had been sealed off. Just what was he?

The boy's eyes groggily slid open while the Hokage mused to himself, and he groaned. "W-what happened?" The boy said, with a yawn and half-opened eyes.

He then tried to move his furry appendage, but failed to even feel movement. "Where's my tail?!"

Sarutobi Hiruzen snapped towards the child, tossing him a gi similar to the one he had prior to the transformation. The only difference were that the pants were black instead to the blue hue they once were.

"Put these on. I'll explain everything afterwards."

The Saiyan quickly changed into his new gi, awaiting the Sandaimes explanation. Hiruzen dropped his cigar on the floor, spewing smoke from his mouth and looking towards the boy. "So, as you know, your tail is missing. The reasons...are rather complicated. Transforming into some kind of Great Ape, you went on a rampage towards the village and breached it, ravaging it in fury. To stop you, we had to cut off your tail and seal it. By the way, what's your name?"

"Son Goku," the boy muttered solemnly, feeling solemn and guilty for his circumstances.

"I see," Hiruzen mused, thinking it ironic to the event that took place the night prior. "I now hereby declare what I just told you to be classified as an SS-ranked secret. You're the only one allowed to tell the secret other than myself to anyone who you deem trustworthy. Those that break those rules will be executed without hesitation, Goku-san. Understood?"

"H-hai," Goku stated hesitantly, responsibility having never been truly dawned on him. "Where's Grandpa Gohan?!" The boy inquired with nothing but curiosity pegged into his voice. The Hokage looked downwards, dreading at the question being asked. What will the boy's reaction be? Clearing his breath with a sigh, Hiruzen answered. "We were unable to find his body after we ended your rampage. Long before he passed on however, he left me a set of instructions regarding your future."

The boy had tears pour down his face, guilt rolling down his spine, shaking him to the core. He clenched his fists and gritted his teeth in anger at himself, and he cleared his eyes of liquid. "T-then what do I do?"

Hiruzen sighed, reading his directions. "You're to live in this village for four years and then live with...Kame-sennin? For the one year following your fourth year in the village. When you return, you will enroll at the Academy once more and become a Genin."

Goku nodded, not saying a word.

"Good. I'll have living quarters arranged for you and enroll you into the academy effective immediately. Dismissed."

Nodding, the Saiyan strode out of the room, a lot on his young seven-year old mind.

- 18 Hours After the Meeting -

"Hey wake up!" a spikey haired child said as he slapped the boy upside the head to get him up. The orphanage generally had a myriad of chores to be done and the blonde would be damned if he had to do some by himself when this new kid could help him.

Goku groaned as he woke up, his head pounding. He wasn't sure what had happened last night or where he was, but there was a loud blue eyed blonde kid around his age yelling at him for some reason.

"Where am I?"

"You're in the orphanage. What's your name?!"

"Son Goku," he said, pointing to himself.

The blue-eyed kid pointed to himself as well, "Uzumaki Naruto!" he said exuberantly.

Goku was then dragged from the bed by his hand and taken from the room in a rush.

"We've got a lot to do today!" Naruto said loudly as he dragged his new friend through the orphanage.

Goku had no idea where he was, but the blonde that had woken him up seemed friendly enough.

The blonde kept looking over and smiling at him as they went about doing chores, which Goku didn't mind. He had no problem with the boy or the chores and he had a feeling that if they didn't do what they were told the stern woman that he saw patrolling the large house would definitely have something to say about it.

Even with all his concentration focused on doing the chores and trying to be happy about it he still couldn't prevent the breakdown that hit him like a truck halfway through the morning as they were doing dishes. His grandfather had presumably been killed on accident in a form he had no control over, or even knew existed.

And when it rained, the gloomy mood settled in.

'Screw this,' he thought as he grabbed his new friend's hand and sneaked away. The kid was lucky he was mourning silently, he knew that bitch wasn't a fan of soppy kids. Even ones recently orphaned like this one, the insensitive cow. The amount of crap he had to put up with from her for no particular reason was ridiculous, he didn't know why he didn't just run away sometimes. Given the fact that he was in the academy in order to pursue of shinobi career, living alone didn't sound so bad anymore...

Emerging from the house, his companion in tow, Naruto quickly made his way to one of his favorite places within the village. Making their way a fair distance from the orphanage and climbing the winding stairs carved into a cliff they soon arrived at the top of the Hokage monument.

The sun was just beginning to properly rise into the sky and as it bathed the village in golden light Naruto couldn't help but smile. He was going to be Hokage someday and this village would be his. Everyone would recognize him for the great man he was!

He noticed a lack of sadness and looking over to find that Goku himself was captivated by the view the lookout offered.

Naruto felt for the guy. He barely knew him but he seemed nice enough. And the fact that he was now in the orphanage meant that something horrible must have happened to his guardian. No wonder he was sad, but concealing his turmoil.

He was lost and alone, just like Naruto was alone. But they didn't have to be alone any longer. They had each other.

-The Next Day-

Naruto spent the rest of the day exploring the village with Goku, using the adventure to try and keep him busy. The boy marveled at everything, from the stores, to the variety of people, especially the ones with funny lavender eyes they saw. He obviously didn't get out very much where he was from.

It was late in the night when the two young boys returned to the orphanage, scolding words thrown at them from the headmistress. She hated that little blonde and if that black haired kid was anything like Naruto she was going to hate him too. Goku obviously didn't care, and Naruto could give two shits about her.

But no, she couldn't do anything about them, not even throw them out; Hokage's orders. She had to put up with having the Kyuubi in her orphanage and some strange child the old man had just dropped in a bed last night.

Both of them scuttled back to their beds as fast as possible, trying not to wake the other children. Naruto didn't need scorn from them either. For some reason none of them liked him anyway. He wondered why?

-With Hiruzen-

"So do you mean to tell us what that booming sound was last night?" One of the civilians piped up from their section of the table.

Hiruzen had just concluded the first half of the meeting, addressing everything that was of concern to the civilians. This was definitely not something he was going to share with everyone.

"If you would please excuse us."

"Excuse you? What is the meaning of this Hokage-sama!"

"There are some things that must not be shared with the public, and to put it bluntly I do not trust you. There are very few people I would trust this information to in actuality but I must reveal the secret to some. The situation has been handled and the source of last night's disturbance has been dealt with. Now you will excuse us," the Hokage said more sternly, concealed anger in his eyes at their insolence.

He was the Hokage, which put him above everyone else in the village.

The civilians got up grumbling and left the meeting room. Only clan heads, the high-ranking Jounin, the two elders and Danzo remained in the room, along with the Hokage's hidden bodyguards.

"Cat, before we proceed did you inform the ANBU that were present last night of this meeting?"

The ANBU stepped from the shadows and nodded.

"Good, fetch them now, this involves them as well."

Danzo wasn't exactly happy that this was being drawn out. And why were ANBU allowed to hear what was said. He understood that they had been involved in subduing the beast-child, but this didn't have to involve them. Unless he was giving a command or something of those sorts.

He would just have to wait and see what his sentimental friend had in store, and what exactly he planned to share with them.

After all the ANBU had filed in to the room, standing at the back away from the table the Hokage spoke.

"As you all know, the village came close to being damaged heavily under a rampage last night. If it were not for all of your efforts, especially yours Hound," the Hokage said, turning his head toward Kakashi, "there would have been a major loss of life for sure."

"What was the threat?" Uchiha Fugaku spoke up. As the head of the police force he needed to know about all incoming hostiles, so he could use them in his planned coup d'etat.

"I was getting to that," Hiruzen said, annoyed at the interruption, "We came under attack from a monster that was handily dealt with."

"What are you not telling us father?" Asuma said from his position within the Jounin.

The old man sighed. "The vile monster was a child… a child I found within the forest while investigating a disturbance with my bodyguards. He turned into the monster during the night of the full moon that caused the destruction that you no doubt all heard and will see if you venture a few miles out from the main gate. I called for ANBU reinforcements, which arrived whilst I kept the monster busy and they all helped me deal with the problem, this is why they have been allowed to hear what I have to say."

"You say a child turned into a monster? What did you do with this child? Is it dead?" Homura the elder councilman spoke up.

"No," the Hokage said to only a few shocked faces. Most of the people in the room knew what kind of man the Hokage was. He'd spare a life if he could. It was the reason Orochimaru was still at large, the biggest threat to the village as of right now.

"Then what became of him," Homura asked once again.

This time Danzo was interested. He would have had one of his ANBU tail the Hokage but if he'd been caught then there would be investigations. And investigations weren't the greatest way to keep a covert operation covert.

"I have put him in the orphanage," the Hokage said. Now people weren't exactly happy.

"A child that was a threat to the entire village and you just put him in an orphanage!" Koharu exclaimed.

"Sounds rather familiar doesn't it?" Danzo added slyly, getting a stern look from the old man in charge.

"I'll not have any of that! He is just a child and his monstrous transformation has been dealt with thanks to Hound, although I believe he performed the attack unknowing that the tail of the beast was the source of it's power."

"Tail? Beast? So we are dealing with a Jinchuuriki?" Gai wondered what particular beast it was if that was the case.

"No, he's not a Jinchuuriki, as far as I can tell, and like I said, I think it is in our best interests to let him live in Konoha. I know not where he is from, but I know that he is alone after killing Gohan-san." Now that caused many people to be shocked, THE Gohan? The one trained by the legendary Muten Roshi?

"Yes," Danzo spoke up from next to the elders, "For once I agree, it would be best to keep him under surveillance and alive. He may be useful in the future, and if we were to turn him out, another village may discover whatever power is hidden within him and use it against us."

Hiruzen's expression darkened, it was very rare that Danzo ever agreed with him.

"Yes, and on a final note do not inform anyone of this. If people ask what the disturbance was and questions are being asked, tell them that we were under attack from a rogue force and that the ANBU Hound was responsible for bringing them to justice. It is better that they focus on a hero within the ranks than a potential but unlikely threat within their midst. The punishment for this will be the same as the punishment for speaking of the nature of Naruto's secret."

One of the ANBU in the ranks at the back of the room, wearing a dog mask, looked to move to be in a position to speak when the Hokage finished.

"My decision is final, there will be no discussion nor debate," he said firmly. "The boy is not to be harmed and he will be watched. The fact that he and Naruto were observed getting along today will make observation easier."

"Now, I'd like to speak with you three," Hiruzen looked over at the three elder council members as he said this, "Kakashi, Ibiki, Shikaku and Inoichi remain behind also. Everyone else, you are dismissed."

The rest of the high-ranking jounin eyed Kakashi curiously, but knew not to make a fuss. They would get their answers if the Hokage deemed it necessary.

"Okay, to get to the really important information. I called the main meeting so that none of the ANBU made a move against the boy or revealed his true nature to the public. Now we must discuss the true nature of the child. What have you been able to determine from the old spacecraft, Ibiki, Inoichi?"

"The thing was pretty beaten up when we brought it in, and it doesn't seem to be able to power-up. Although it might just be because we don't know how. The technology involved is amazing, vastly ahead of our worlds. If we can reverse engineer even half of the tech from this thing we'll be well off, that's for sure." Ibiki said, the scars on his face moving animatedly as he spoke in the low light.

"What craft?" Danzo had heard nothing of a craft from his operative. This was definitely news to him.

"I said I did not know where the boy was from because he is from the stars. I have no idea how but he fell from the sky seven years ago in a craft that seemingly allows safe travel between celestial objects. How, I do not know. But what it means is that we aren't as alone as we thought."

Everyone who wasn't in the know, meaning the three elders and Shikaku, were in shock.

"Th-the implications," Homaru stuttered out.

"Yes we know," Kakashi said, "the question though is what we are going to do with this information."

"The people in this room are the only people that know of the nature of the boy and the craft. Everyone else that is working on the craft don't know the relationship it had with the boy and the ANBU that fought him don't know of the craft either. It was buried under rubble and covered in moss by the time they arrived," the Hokage explained. "What is worrisome is that a small child like him could not come up with technology like that. So there are others. We are not alone and who knows how powerful some of the beings out there are?"

Shikaku was still sitting stunned in silence as is mind ticked away at trying to comprehend the possibilities and implications. This was mind-boggling.

"Hokage-sama," Inoichi spoke softly, getting the attention of everyone in the room, "There's something else. We found a small spherical object inside the house of Gohan, a golden orb with four red stars on it. Preliminary investigations show that it contains extremely immense power, easily enough to make a Bijuu look like an ant in comparison. We are unsure of just how to access this power though. It may not be possible."

"That is fine," the Hokage said, not one to miss the greedy look that slipped across Danzo's face for just a second. "For now we must focus on keeping the boy safe until he can tell us his story and continue trying to obtain information and technology from the craft. As long as this enormous power is contained and isn't a threat, it shall not be our top priority."

"Hai, Hokage-sama," they responded, which ended the meeting right then and there.

- Two Weeks Later -

The duo had finished up their chores quickly before they headed out to an open parkland area, this one sitting near a path that ran along the water.

"Okay," Naruto said as he turned to his newly-minted friend, "let's fight!"

"Finally!" Goku got into his signature fighting stance taught by the late Son Gohan. "Let's do this!"

"Go!" Naruto shouted, charging in earnest. Only to have Goku charge him to the ground, easily shoving him over and trying to hit him while he was down. Suffice to say, most of the attacks landed. He wasn't hitting Naruto as hard as he could, but he was making an example of him for letting him get the early advantage.

Naruto quickly came to his senses, otherwise it wouldn't have been long before he'd be seeing stars, and blocked a punch, pushing the boy off and punching him in the chest, allowing him room to back away and get to his feet.

Goku backflipped and then sprinted towards Naruto, blitzing him with his Saiyan physicality. The Saiyan attempted to hit Naruto with a swing, but the blonde jumped backwards just in time. However, he found himself unprepared for the sweeping kick that followed. Goku connected, and the kick knocked Naruto into the air. The son of Bardock capitalized on it, grabbing the Uzumaki's leg and tossing him after rotating three times.

Naruto, whilst being tossed, managed to grab Goku's arm and pull him along, making both tumble. Naruto punched Goku twice in the face, before Goku flipped over and gave the blonde a harsh roundhouse kick. The blow staggered him, sending him tumbling backwards. Goku, not able to regain control of himself, rolled onto the ground as well.

As they both got to their feet, they heard a small giggle, causing both of their heads to snap in the direction of the sound. There was a small girl standing and watching them from a distance. She had strange lavender, almost white, eyes and medium length black hair. She looked to be trying to cover her face with her hands. Occasionally she would move her hands away from her face, pushing her two index fingers together, before she went back to hiding behind them.

"W-what are you two doing?" She asked timidly through her hands when they looked over to her.

Hinata normally wouldn't have ever bothered talking to these boys, but they were curious. They looked like they were getting along, until the black-haired boy started to beat the other one up, and then they roughhoused with each other. She could only wonder why.

"What does it look like? We were sparring," Naruto said loudly, annoyed that this girl couldn't work it out.

She giggled again, "T-that's n-not how you spar, that's j-just roughhousing," she said with a smile.

"Aren't those the same things?"

The shy girl shook her head; she knew the difference. Her father was training her to be the head of the clan after all.

"H-here," Hinata said as she finally made her way to them, getting into a stance. "you spar like th…"

Before she could even begin her explanation her bodyguard interrupted her.

"Hinata-sama, it is time to leave, leave those riff-raffs alone."

"Hey, we're not riff-raffs!" Goku spat back defiantly.

He'd entertained her curiosity for a little while, but she was getting too friendly with the Kyuubi and that black haired orphan. Well he figured he was an orphan. The only way he'd be hanging around that brat was if he had no one to tell him otherwise.

Goku found himself a bit disappointed that the indigo-haired girl that had mustered the courage to talk to them had to leave so soon, and he didn't like the way that the guard had addressed them.

"What's your name?" The Saiyan called out after the girl as she left them alone, "My name's Goku!"

"I'm Hinata," she said just loud enough for him to hear as she walked away with a rather sad expression on her face. She finally might have been able to make some friends for once. All she wanted was people that were her age to mingle and play with.

Before Goku could ponder on the situation any longer, his yellow-haired friend called out to him. "DODGE!"

"What?" Goku's question was swiftly answered when a fist bounced off his face, knocking him back a few feet.

"Hey, I wasn't ready!"

"So?" Naruto asked with a shit-eating grin on his face — you had to be ready all the time.

"Good point," Goku added before charging right back at him to attack. He broke through the blonde's guard with practical ease and clipped Naruto in the jaw, throwing him back some and making him stagger dizzily.

The two boys proceeded to "roughhouse" for the rest of the afternoon, having the time of their lives.

- A Week Later -

"So what do you want to do today?" Naruto asked his one and only friend Goku

"Umm, how about we go look at the shops? I wanna see all the cool stuff they have," the boy responded.

"Surely it's the same stuff from your village," the blonde replied, confused as to why Goku was so excited about looking at things they didn't have the money to buy.

"Besides, the shopkeepers don't really like me, and I don't know why," he added dejectedly.

"That's pretty weird, I don't think we did anything wrong," Goku commented with obvious boredom.

"Yeah well don't ask me, I don't have a clue."

"I guess all we can do is hope they'll let us look around." Goku said hopefully. Aside from the bullies they constantly ran into, Goku hadn't really met anyone mean in Konoha. He didn't think the head mistress at the orphanage was mean; she was just stern.

Sure people ignored him and Naruto, but he thought that was because they were "orphans." Sure it was rude, but that never mattered to him.

Gaining the confidence to walk into a shop, Goku pulled Naruto along with him inside.

Not three seconds later they were being thrown out, "STAY OUT OF MY SHOP IF YOU CAN'T BUY ANYTHING, ESPECIALLY YOU BLONDIE!"

Goku was confident that it was just the one shopkeeper. But his firm confidence took blow after blow as they went to shop after shop and were thrown out immediately. Occasionally, a shopkeeper would let them look around for a little while before asking them to leave politely. Other times they wouldn't even get a foot within the door before they were yelled at to leave.

The only people Goku could say that were nice to Naruto and him were the old man and his daughter that worked at the ramen place. They didn't look at them with scorn or completely ignore them. The aged man even smiled at Naruto as they walked past to try and cheer him up, so he seemed like a nice guy. They even fed both of them a free bowl of delicious ramen to compensate for their rough lives, which made them instantly fall in love with the place.

At the end of the ordeal, both of them looked dejected as they sat down on a park bench. The wind was blowing their hair around and rustling the leaves of the trees nearby, making it more difficult for anyone to overhear their conversation. They'd need to be sitting in the tree directly above the bench to overhear the conversation; not that they were worried if someone overheard them.

"Told you they hate me," Naruto said sadly.

"What got em' to hate you?" Goku asked, a little vexed.

"I don't know. I mean I prank them sometimes, ya know that," He put his head in his hands as tears started forming at the edges of his eyes, "But that's only because they ignore me."

Goku was amazed, as his friend always seemed so full of life and energy. This was the first time that he realized that without each other they were both alone in this large, harsh, cruel environment known as the world. Even living out in the wilderness with Grandpa Gohan was better than being alone in the village, as he never had to deal with the amount of hatred launched at him everyday in Mount Paozu. He'd stick by his friend, and he wouldn't let anything come between them. Otherwise they'd be alone again, and Goku didn't particularly enjoy being alone, but he was used to it, living in the woods all of his life.

The Saiyan turned to his friend, pulling his feet up onto the bench as he wrapped his arms around his knees to stop his legs falling back to the ground. "What were those cool metal knives and discs that we saw in those shops?" Goku asked, wondering just what they were used for. They looked very deadly and lethal to him.

"They were kunai and shuriken," Naruto said wiping the tears from his eyes with a small smile forming on his lips. "Ninja use them, and one day I'm going to use them when I become the greatest shinobi ever and become Hokage!"

All Goku could do was laugh. "So you wanna be one of those cool guys with the green jackets?" Naruto had explained to the Saiyan that if you wanted to be cool, you had to be a shinobi and pointed out some of the coolest ninja in the village whenever they were around, namely the ANBU and the Jounin.

"Nah even cooler. The Hokage is the head of the entire village and he has an awesome hat!"

"I'm gonna go to the academy and learn to be a ninja and then I'm gonna be so awesome they'll just have to make me Hokage, dattebayo!" Naruto yelled to no one in particular, he stood up on the bench and raised a fist in the air, "No one's gonna stop me!" The blonde promptly calmed down and sat back on the bench, "So what do you want to do when you get older?"

"I dunno, I guess become as strong as I can be?"

"Where is your home?" Naruto asked, curious as to where his friend was from.

"I lived in Mount Paozu for my whole life until I got here."

Before he broke into a massive grin, "That is SO COOL, DATTEBAYO!"

Then Naruto realized what that meant for his friend.

"Then why exactly are you here?" Now it was Naruto's turn to be concerned for his friend.

"My grandpa named Gohan was killed somehow..." Goku said, the slight waver in his voice showing it was a touchy subject, "...by me."

Naruto remained silent for awhile, letting the realization dawn on him. Goku decided not to leave his friend worrying and broke the silence. "But it's okay, it was just an accident."

"Well hey, stuff happens. Why don't you become a shinobi like me! We can be ninja together and stop bad things from happening and I dunno, get stronger!"

"Sure! I'll be a shinobi and surpass my limits!" A slight smile touching his lips.

And at that moment came the most random attack. Literally.

A kunai flashed from a tree on the opposite side of the park with blinding speed.


Reacting in time to launch her own shuriken that would knock the kill-shot off of its path, the ANBU member known as Cat turned to find a fellow, rogue ANBU black op lunging at her from behind.

She quickly fell backwards from the tree, landing next to the boys, and before they could say anything, the teenager spoke up. "Goku, Naruto, you are both in danger, stay near me and I'll keep you safe."

The ANBU that had attacked her dropped from the tree, his features covered by a bear mask, while another sprinted out from the other side of the clearing her mask depicting a ferret.

Ferret quickly came to a stop out of reach of Cat as she tried to protect the two children. They were surrounded, and Cat knew that as fast as she was, she wasn't going to be able to get both of them out of harm's way if she tried to flee.

The question then became, could she protect them while fighting two Anbu-level combatants?

What she was most surprised by though was that the attack came in broad daylight. And while the park was mostly empty, Cat could spot a few civilians playing with their children and a young Hyuga and her bodyguard. There were witnesses. Just what the hell were they thinking?

"What's going on?" Goku asked, oblivious to the killer intent in the area. He recognized the Cat mask on the woman that was protecting them. But why was she even in the tree above them to begin with? What was going on?

Naruto looked just as confused as he stood next to his friend, fear in his eyes. Why were they in danger? What was going on? His thoughts perfectly mimicked Goku's.

"You don't have to do this," Cat proclaimed as she tried to prevent them from advancing any further.

"You think you can stop us?" Bear said as he took another step toward the boys. "It's two against one. And even if we fail there will be others. Don't think that just because we didn't protest to the Hokage's actions that we agree with them!"

He lunged at Goku in an angry strike, intent on taking the child's life.

"Stay away from my friend!" Naruto yelled at the strange man, stepping between the masked assailant and Goku.

"No!" Goku shouted, pushing both himself and Naruto out of harms way, hitting the ground. Bear turned back around and leaped back towards them with a speed that the little Goku could barely even register. Using his Saiyan instincts, he caught very few of his opponents wild strikes and narrowly evaded the rest. Then one strike connected...

And it knocked the utter wind out of the Saiyan.

Naruto then, having had enough, scooped Bear by the legs and caught him off-guard with a tackle. However, the Anbu kicked Naruto off of his leg and flipped over. Then Goku once again reappeared in front of him, ready to fight for his and Naruto's sake.

The angry ANBU hesitated just enough at the sight of the boy in his way for Cat to step between the two and separate the man's arm at the elbow with her blade, her blade a silver blur as she unsheathed it and struck in one swift motion.

Ferret had been charging from the other side at the same time, but seeing her partner go down hard gave her just the slightest falter in her step. Cat capitalized on the error, turning her body and dashing past the boys in a burst of pure speed, putting her blade straight through the kunoichi's abdomen before she could harm Naruto.

She might have been fifteen years old, but there was something to be said for her skills if she had been a bodyguard to the Hokage. She simply wasn't going to be bested by two regular ANBU, especially when these boys lives were at stake.

Naruto turned to say thank you, but was stopped as the mysterious Cat held up her hand to stop him from speaking. She stalked over to the shinobi that was still alive, and his hand lie twitching on the ground.

He made to throw two shuriken with his off-hand, but they were easily intercepted by Cat's blade before she lifted it and drove it into his torso, pinning him to the ground, protective anger surfacing for just a second.

"Why?" She seethed, bending down to take off the mask.

"I was not…" the shinobi spluttered his words with barely a whisper in the ears of Cat, "We were not going to raise a child in a world that contained such a monster."

"You're wrong," Cat said coolly, feeling nothing for what she had done to this man. "You're the monster. A monster that tried to kill two innocent children who don't know any better." She promptly twisted the blade, ending the encounter, the life quickly fading from his eyes.

Goku and Naruto were both stunned after what had happened. It had only been moments, but now both of their attackers were dead, and they were saved. Thanks again to this mysterious Cat. Only this time the stakes had been much, much higher.

The masked woman unrolled a scroll she extracted from her vest before placing it on the body of the dead man. It disappeared in a puff of smoke and she moved to do the same with the woman before Goku finally spoke up.

"Thanks uhhh...Cat," he said, unsure of how to actually respond to the situation. He was shaken, but not out of fear, but rather from being excited?!

"Why'd they wanna hurt us? What the heck is going on?" Why did anyone want to hurt them?

"I cannot answer that boys, only know that I'm here to protect you," she bent down over the body of the woman, it too disappearing in a puff of smoke after the scroll was placed on her chest. "You will have answers eventually, just not from me."

She disappeared in a Shunshin. It was hard to just leave them when she wanted to comfort them, to try and explain the situation, but she needed to report this and she'd just seen Hatake Kakashi land in the tree above the park bench where the boys had been sitting. They had protection, and the Hokage had to know.

Effective immediately.