A/N: This is the first of a number of nonsensical stories I come up with at random moments, and I will add others later. I hope you find them as funny as I do!
Disclaimer: I don't own Newsies, sadly, they belong to Disney. Nor do I own any of the other Disney characters that might make an appearance. Mac, however, is my own creation (as am I!). Please read and review!
1. The Laughing Boy
(Pie Eater is sitting in an armchair, laughing hysterically after reading a funny story, and Skittery and Spot are glaring at him, thoroughly unimpressed. Race is playing Poker with Kid Blink, Mush and Snipes, and his voice is getting louder and higher in a desperate attempt to be heard over Pie. Bumlets is having a stick fight with Mac, watched by Tumbler, Romeo, Les and Crutchy, and Specs and Dutchy have a retreated to the corner with me, where I am showing them how to play Wizard 101 on my computer. Everyone else has fled the scene.)
SKITTERY: (having finally had enough) PIE EATER!
(Pie responds by laughing some more.)
SKITTERY: Pie, if you don't shut up right now, I'll come over there and BRAIN you!
SPOT: Yeah! Me too!
(Pie continues to laugh. Race, who is fast reaching the end of his tether and vocal range, starts to weep as he continues to scream over Pie. This in turn causes Mush to start whimpering and Blink to pull a series of pained faces. Mac and Bumlets' fight gets more intense as the general tension gets to them, and their spectators start cheering loudly in an attempt to block out the din.)
SPOT: (getting up but watching me warily out of the corner of his eye; he knows I can see him.) Pie, Please Shut Up!
(Pie apparently finds this hilarious and falls out of the chair. Spot goes red with fury and clenches his fists, wanting more than anything to punch Pie, but he knows I won't allow it, so he returns to his seat. Everyone continues to try to ignore the laughing boy, while the volume levels steadily rise.)
SPECS: (looking at the laptop screen in front of him) So how do I get back to that hidden cave under the waterfall...?
DUTCHY: (looking at the computer screen in front of him) Specs, stop turning your character round in circles! You're making me dizzy!
SPECS: I'm not moving him!
DUTCHY: Yes you are!
SPECS: Am not!
DUTCHY: Are too!
ME: Boys, that's enough...
(Pie is showing no signs of tiring. Race, on the other hand, has lost it. He shoots out of his chair and advances on the completely oblivious Pie, still screaming his Poker moves at the top of his voice, tears streaming down his face. Seeing this, and not wanting any murders to take place in my house, I leap up onto the table, grab a random megaphone that I keep on the mantlepiece and yell into it.)
ME: EVERYBODY, SHUT UP !
(My cry cuts through the noise and the sudden silence is deafening. I look around at the boys (and girl) who have frozen in position, all looking at me. I smile and start to get down. But just as I reach the floor, a quiet whimper comes from somewhere. I look at Mush, expecting it to be him, but he is still sitting motionless, a look of shock on his face. Another whimper draws my attention back to a very deflated looking Pie. As I watch, his face suddenly crumples and he starts to cry, the sudden change in mood too much for him, and he is soon bawling his head off. Race bursts into fresh tears and flees onto the street, followed by most of the others. In the corner, Specs and Dutchy slide under the table as discreetly as possible, soon joined by Mush, leaving me alone with the distraught Pie.)
ME: Oh no...