Hello, here's a short, cracky fic that wouldn't leave me alone. Sorry if it's a little ooc for some characters, but hey it's just nonsense and it's a change from my usual depressing stuff.

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters.

"You're kidding me, right?" Damian drawled with one eyebrow raised. He held in his hand- or rather between his fingers and thumbs to show his level of disgust - a pair of green scaled undies. " You actually wore these, Grayson?"

Dick suddenly stopped rummaging, head turning almost knowingly before he laughed. "Oh God, put those back where you found them." Dick straightened up and cracked his back. He'd forgotten about those, um, things.

Jason stood a few feet away. He had his head down and was busy studying a small toy car, turing it over in his hands. The second oldest raised his head at Dick's laughter and joined in when he spotted the green abomination in Damian's hand.

"Jesus Christ." Jason choked, "Those things haunt my dreams." He put the car down and went to snatch them out of Damian's grip. "Do you think they'll still fit, Dickie-bird?"

"Oh, hell no. You're welcome to attempt-" he was cut off by the sight of Jason pulling them on. Well, they only fit one leg.

"I can't get them past my calf muscle." Jason raised his leg slightly so the underwear dangled away from his leg. He pulled them off again and turned to Damian. "You're small enough, they'll probably fit you."

Damian made a face like he'd smelled something unpleasant, "Fuck no."

Jason shot Dick a glance and took a step closer to the youngest bat, "Come on, Dami. Be a team sport...just put 'em on."

Damian turned to run and Dick dove forward, catching his younger brother around the waist. Damian rebelled by punching and kicking furiously, spitting curses that even a sailor would blush at before Dick managed to pin him.

At that moment Tim came down the stairs, "Hey Alfred was wondering what you guy wanted for..." He stared, "Dinner...what the heck are you doing?"

What Tim was witnessing was Damian lying on the floor of the cave, head turned to one side, glaring whilst Dick had both of Damian's arms pinned and Jason stood above them both holding the green underwear with the most sinister facial expression, like he could have eminated an evil laugh at any second.

"We're trying to get the brat into these." Jason explained, "He's not playing nice."

Dick spoke up from the floor, "Pizza."

" What?" Tim turned his attention to Dick.

" For dinner. We want Pizza."

"...Okay. I'll just...leave you to it, I suppose."

"Drake, don't you dare!" Damian protested.

"Just put the panties on, Damian."


" ...Dick just let him go, I'm starving."

"Yeah...me too."

"Fine. Come on, baby-bird. We're sorry."

"Oh, you will be. You'll be very sorry. I'll use that fucking thing to choke the life out of you."