We had to write a story in English with symbolism, this is what I did. I didn't intend the character to be Jason but I couldn't come up with another name.

Jason walked along the dense forest floor, lightly decorated with snow, his tracks clearly marking his path. He clutched his bleeding side as he stumbled through the cold, the snow slowly making a dotted trail of red as blood fell through his fingers. The wound didn't look that bad, but it was hard to see through the crimson gushing out.

'Just a simple bullet, it's amazing how such a small object can do so much damage' Jason thought as he continued to try and navigate the large forest.

The sky slowly became darker and with each passing, Jason's hope faded with the sunlight. He paused his painful trek to check his wound. The blood was still pouring out, but not as quickly as before. Unseen Ravens cawed angrily from the canopy. The freezing cold air whispered eerily as it passed Jason's ear.

"The end"

Jason wasn't sure whether the wind was actually speaking to him or the blood loss had made him delusional. He entered a small clearing and laid against an icy rock. His ragged breaths creating puffs of smoke with every exhale. A small rabbit hopped around, almost invisible against the snowy ground. Following the red trail, the little bunny cautiously approached Jason. She leaned toward his wound and twitched her nose. Jason smiled at the little ball of fluff, she seemed almost, sad. He slowly let his fern green eyes close and let out one last breath. The young rabbit watched with watery, red eyes before bounding back to her burrow.


This is an excellent effort. There are some small technical problems but they're easily fixed. The point is, you have great potential. Read widely and keep could do very well in the creative writing section in the HSC.

We were supposed to use symbolism, so I used;
Winter and ravens for death
Rabbit for new life


Oh and he's meant to be around 20. A friend suggested that Tim saves him, but I'm not sure whether or not to just leave it here. My other friend (Miminfifi, you should look at her stories. She only has two right now but lots are in progress and they are really good) and she said I should make Tim find him, but he's dead.

I am conflicted, so until I have decided, it will remain as just this.