Mostly insomnia induced but I really did try but yeah, probably needs edited. Euphemia and Suzaku cultivating their Bounty Hunter cred was kind of fun to write, and their very limited knowledge of the Force is enough for them to accept the insane coincidence meeting later in the chapter without much question.
"I'm sorry, really, please just forgive me!" Euphemia rolled her eyes as Suzaku hefted up the "negotiation bar " (it was an eight inch long two and a half inch width bar of durasteeel Suzaku found on Corellia when he was kinda sorta drunk and had to fight off some muggers) and smashed it against the Twi'lek man's hands in annoyance.
He screamed in pain, of course, and Euphemia let out a tired sigh as she shook her head slowly, "It hurts me that we have to even have this discussion, but Jabba demands justice, and his payment plans do not bounce. So..."
"You're kinda borked, sorry!" Suzaku shot out sounding highly amused as he did so while he wiped fresh blood off the negotiation bar.
Euphemia grinned at that, "What he said!" Then her cheerfulness dropped as she cocked her head to the side, "Now are you going to behave and tell us what you did with the credits or am I going to have to become...inventive?"
"Go to hell you kriffing whore!"
Euphemia smirked, "Inventive it is then. How many bones are there in a Twi'lek's foot?"
Their was a pause then, "Wait, wait I can pay you if you just let me go!"
Suzaku snorted in amusement as Euphemia pulled out a pair of pliers and grinned down as their victim's foot was laid beneath her husbands chosen cudgel, "I have no idea dear, but I'm willing to to find out!"
"Please, please! I... I have a daughter, she's beautiful, if you'd like I can arrange her to be available for a... a... trade?"
The two beskar'gam clad mercenaries stared down at the filth tied down before them when Euphemia eventually stated, "Sweety, could you hand me the bolt cutters?"
Two hours later Suzaku eventually let out a sigh.
"Go ahead, say it," he sighed out.
"I will, good cop bad cop does not work when your target is a self interested monster that both of us want to hurt."
"Which we did."
"We kind of went overboard on him but really I feel no remorse."
"Regardless, you were right love, I admit it, he's a bloody monster."
Silence for a time then Euphemia sighed, "We'll be on Tatooine in twenty minutes so he will soon be Jabba's problem, maybe if we fed him feet first into a wood chipper we wou-"
"I'll give you the access codes to the accounts I transferred the credits to! Just please don't hurt me anymore!"
Euphemia blinked shocked that their victim was still conscious while she and Suzaku turned to the Twi'lek in surprise.
"Please! I don't want to die! I'll give you all the account information! Just don't hurt me anymore and please, please don't give me to Jabba!"
The Mandalorian couple glanced at each other, exchanged a silent conversation then shrugged.
"All right then," Suzaku began, "start talking."
Twenty minutes later the Kururugi's had access to four hundred thousand stolen credits and neither of them could quite process the complete idiocy of the man in their ships brig.
Eventually Suzaku said what they were both thinking, "He... He committed the galaxies most perfectly traceable crime... Against a Hutt none the less, then openly surrendered his ill begotten gains in a desperate grab for salvation without even negotiating terms."
Euphemia ran a hand through her hair then quickly shook her head, "I just can't even... Let's turn him in and be done with it. We will give Jabba the account info and wash our hands of this entire fiasco. Brownie points earned, reputation solidified, and we jog right the hell on."
"Agreed," Suzaku said while shaking his head in annoyance.
They landed in Bestine, took a rented speeder all the way out to Jabba's Palace and after much posturing with the guards and the Hutt's many hangers on they pushed the idiot before them. As they stood before Jabba the idiot tried to make a break for it and Euphemia let out an audible sigh of exasperation as she fired her wrist mounted grappling hook at him.
The hook shot through his left calf and sent blood spraying as its barbs extended and the Twi'lek cried in agonized horror as he was dragged back towards her.
Suzaku shook his head slowly as he turned back to the Hutt while tilting his head in deference, "Our apologies mighty Jabba, this particular hunt has been rather exasperating considering the cowardice inherent in our prey and my wife has lost any patience she may have had in dealing with him."
Jabba stared down at him for a few moments, glanced towards Euphemia who was beating her bounty target over the head with a collapsible truncheon while swearing up a tear in Huttese, then met Suzaku's helms reflective gaze for a moment before muttering out, "Women."
Suzaku nodded quickly at that, "Right? So about that bounty?"
Apparently turning the stolen accounts over impressed the Hutt so on top of the bounty Jabba had allowed them to keep half the credits as a sign of good faith.
It was surprising but not unwanted, so once they returned to Bestine they poked through the shopping district for a time when they heard a voice that carried through the crowd.
"Luke do you think this board would work? I think we would have to solder a few contact points but it looks exactly like what Ben told us we needed for our...tools..."
They stared at the brunette a moment when a blonde boy leaned forward and nodded with a smile on his lips, "Yeah Nunnally, I think that would work perfectly, though we're going to have to replace a component or two..."
"Wait...wait...what!?" Euphemia began hyperventilating and Suzaku quickly pulled her into his embrace while trying to calm her down, all while wondering exactly why the universe had such a twisted sense of humor.
The pair stood there for a time as the teens they were observing bought their wares and left, completely oblivious of the observing couple approaching a near mental breakdown.
After a few minutes Euphemia calmed down and eventually seethed out, "Lelouch would blame the Force for this."
Suzaku nodded, "Agreed. Follow them?"
Euphemia let a growl out at that, "Oh yes, I'd love to know why my little sister has kept us worrying over whether she was dead or not for the past year..."
Suzaku paused at that, then nodded, better her then him after all.
Nunnally was fiddling with the circuits she had picked up earlier in the morning while Luke stared at the crystal housing of his father's lightsaber, trying to figure out exactly what he needed to do to properly center one of the gems they had acquired for their little project.
Master Obi-Wan had been quite specific on the details of what was needed to make their first lightsabers, but being able to dismantle and understand the inner workings of a tool that most Jedi considered to be an extension of themselves had been beyond helpful in the long run.
Sticking her tongue out of the corner of her mouth Nunnally held the circuit board up to the light looking for any faults in it when there was a knock on the door of the Lars family garage.
Luke sighed, placed the crystal housing on the desk and walked over to the door, with a hydraulic hiss it slid open and they were confronted by two armor clad people with rifles in hand.
They stared at Luke, then the one with pink trimmed armor looked past his shoulder, stared at Nunnally for a time, then let out an audible sigh as she slung her weapon and removed her helmet.
Nunnally choked a bit when she met the violet gaze of the woman who was now sending her a disapproving glare.
"Nunnally vi Britannia, do you have any idea how worried you've made our brother?! And where is your Knightmare young lady?"
"Euphemia?" Nunnally muttered as the circuit board nearly fell from her hands, Luke turned towards his friend, back to the newcomers, then back to Nunnally.
That's when Nunnally's eyes rolled into the back of her head and she fell to the floor with a thump, Luke panicked as he rushed towards his fallen friend while Euphemia let out a tired sigh.
"Told you that would happen," Suzaku stated blithely, Euphemia gave her husband the archer's salute then marched into the garage while pulling out a medical scanner.
She may be ignoring his commentary but he wasn't wrong, and with that annoyed thought she knelt down beside her sister as she began her scan silently wondering what stories she would be sharing when she awoke.
Eventually she turned to meet the blonde boys gaze while raising a single brow as the scan continued, "And who are you to my little sister?"
The boy sputtered a moment before his visage took on a determined look.
It was adorable.
"I'm Luke Skywalker, and... I...think I'm Nunnally's boyfriend."
Suzakua chuckled at that, "You think you're her boyfriend."
Luke scratched the back of his head a moment before shrugging sheepishly, "Nunnally is hard to read when she wants to be coy."
The Kururugi couple paused for a moment before they chorused, "Agreed."
Eventually Nunnally awoke and as she sat up she looked between Suzaku and Euphemia a few moments before asking, "How?"
"Lelouch," they stated in unison.
"Of course... Well... Luke let me introduce you to my as of five minutes ago thought to be dead family, Euphemia and Suzaku..."
"Is that really a tone befitting a Princess?" Suzaku teased.
Luke blinked then turned back towards Nunnally who was now blushing brightly, "Princess? What is he talking about?"
Euphemia giggled then turned to focus her gaze on the now crimson visage of her little sister, "Oh, didn't Nunu tell you? She's the Crown Princess of the Holy Empire of Britannia, one Nunnally vi Britannia, younger sister of the Emperor of the Realm Lelouch vi Britannia."
Luke stared at Nunnally for a time before he rubbed his hands across his face a few moments before he stood up, "I'll let Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru know we're going to have extra guests for dinner..." With that he marched out of the room leaving the trio of Britannians alone, a few minutes later Nunnally stood up and began putting Luke's lightsaber back together.
Once done she placed it on the work bench and then braced her hands against it as she rested all her weight on its surface, after a time she eventually spoke.
"I didn't want him to know I was a princess..."
"Why?" Suzaku asked.
Nunnally let out a weak laugh as she walked away from the couple that up till ten minutes ago she thought was dead, "Because I was falling in love with him and now he'll think he will never be good enough for me. Thanks, appreciated."
As she swept out of the room Suzaku tilted his head to the side and muttered out, "Holy shit she's become a moody teenager..."
Euphemia responded with an amused lilt to her voice, "Oh they grow up so fast."
"Should we, you know, go talk to them?"
Euphemia snorted at that, "Teenagers."
Suzaku paused, then nodded, "Right. Well we're apparently invited to dinner so shall we prepare?"
His wife's voice took on a playful tone as she replied, "But dear, I have nothing to wear."
"I'm sure we can find enough burlap for you to fit in with the locals dear."
Euphemia burst out laughing, and the couple soon left the garage to hunt down a pair of overly emotional teenagers.