I do not own anything about Buffy the vampire slayer or the characters except for my oc Character and the story plot. Everything else belongs to Joss Whedon. Please review and please if you have nothing nice to say, then please do not comment or review. Please keep your comments to yourself. Thank you! Now then on to the story...

Bold - Text messages

italics - means thinking

Previously on Primal Evil - "You didn't bite me did you?"

"Relax wanker if I wanted to turn you from a bite don't you think I would have already done so already?"

"So you did bite me! You bastard!" I cried out sitting up in the bed in both shock and anger.

"So am I going to turn into a vampire now on top of this damned hyena spirit thing? Great this is just great. I mean Buffy's gonna kill me."

"Actually she'll kill me." Spike interjected. "Or at least she'll try to. I mean between you and me we both know she doesn't have the heart to stake me."

"Considering you banged her." I said rolling my eyes as I slowly lowered myself back down onto the bed letting my weary head hit the pillows.

"Careful wanker, I may have bitten you, but I can turn you If I choose to." Spike replied as I saw a flash of blue shimmering in his eyes causing me to shiver in fright as I took in a deep breath and rolled over on my side so that I wasn't facing him anymore.

"Xander? What's going on? Please tell me you and Spike aren't getting it on with each other? Cause that's just sick and wrong."

"God no!" I cried out quickly moving from the bed to stand but a wave of dizziness forced me to sit down on the bed nearly falling back down on my back. Beads of sweat started for form on my forehead and I could feel waves of pain flowing down my shoulder.

"How the hell did you find me here?" Spike asked. "This is my lair."

"I used a tracking spell in order to find Xander and it's a damn good thing I did." Willow's tone was starting to rise in anger. "I swear to holy hell Spike If you hurt him I will do a hell of a lot worse to you then Buffy ever could."

"Will, it's not Spike's fault okay? It's mine. I was being stupid like always."

"What are you talking about Xander?" Willow asked as I heard the sound of her footsteps walking toward me.

A burst of pain shot down my arm so intense that I cried out agony clutching my shoulder as the rest of my body suddenly started shaking as though I was convulsing. The high pitched hyena laughter I had heard before was now all around me ringing inside my head.

"Xander? Xander are you okay?" I distantly heard Willow's voice calling me as my vision started to go blurry. I had no idea what the hell was happening to me but I knew that whatever it was it definitely wasn't good.

The next thing I heard was the sound of Willow screaming and a hard crunching noise, which sounded like bones snapping, followed by someone shrieking in agony. For the second time in what felt like an eternity since Spike saved me all I saw was nothing but darkness unaware if I had just committed the murder of my best friend and if Willow was even still alive or not.


Chapter 4 - The aftermath


The first thing I remembered upon waking in a cold sweat gasping for breath was the sound of Willow screaming and my heart raced a million miles an hour as I bolted right up on the bed. My shoulder throbbed in pain and I winced as I looked around searching for a sign of Willow but saw no sign of her anywhere and stomach churned with worry. There was nothing but darkness all around me with only a small bit of light casting eerie shadows along the walls followed by groaning sounds of pain that sounded human. Sort of. A cold shiver of fear ran down my spine as I thought it came from Willow and the possibility that I had turned her instead of killing her.

Wait I'm a ghoul can I turn others like vampires can? I shook the thought from my weary brain. Why the hell am I even thinking that for? What the hell is wrong with me? I thought. For god's sake my best friend's life is in danger and once again I'm powerless to do anything much less even help her!

I mentally screamed at myself feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt crushing me as I then heard someone cry out, "Damn it all to bloody hell!"

"Spike?" realizing something wasn't right I found myself calling out captain peroxide's name to which I heard him reply with a loud irritated growl full of agony.

"Are you okay?" I asked hesitating at my words as more light was shone throughout the lair and I caught the sight of a gaping bleeding wound on Spike's chest. I felt my stomach turn at the sight of the wound and forced myself to look away as I asked, "Where's Willow? Is she okay?"

"I got to hand it to you wanker, you can pack quite a hell of a punch there." Spike said as I heard him take a swig off a whisky bottle. "This wound will take a bit to heal up but then again I've been through a hell of a lot worse then this."

"Where's Willow?" I demanded my voice slightly more forceful then I would've liked and instantly regretting it.

"Relax she's fine." Spike replied. "I managed to stop you in time before you could do some real damage to her."

I felt myself let out a breath of relief and silently began praying, Thank god she's okay.

Just then as I laid back down on the bed another jarring thought shot into my brain. What the hell am I gonna do now? I'm a monster. What the hell are my parent's gonna think? If they didn't care about me before what would make them think any differently now? I'm a damn blood sucking flesh eating zombie.

I felt a wave of emotion start to crush me as I blinked back the tears of regret. I had always wondered what it would be like to have super powers like Buffy or be able to control magic like Willow and Tara or even what it's like to be a vengeance demon like Anya. I had always wondered what it would be like to not be the only one out the group who's just seen as the handyman who fixes things that are broken when need repairing. The only one out of the group who's not being watched by a watcher. The only one out of the group who's human.

Now all that time of wondering had finally happened, except for the fact that I've gone from being human to a monster who can turn and attack my friends. The only people in my life who actually mean something to me. The only people in my life who I see as my true family.

"How do you do it Spike?" I asked trying to keep the hint of raw emotion out of my voice as I spoke.

Spike looked at me from the other side of the room with a half empty bottle of whisky in his hand. "Sorry?" He asked. "Do what?"

I drew in a shaky breath as I struggled to find the words and the strength to continue.

"How do you keep yourself from losing control?"

"It's not as easy as you might think Wanker." Spike said rolling his eyes in annoyance.

"Being a vampire is no walk in the park you know, it's very nasty business."

"Yeah, but how do you manage to stay in control all the time? I mean you've had plenty of chances to bite every one of us and turn us like Drusilla turned you and you've never done it not even once. Why?"

Spike thought about it for a moment before replying, "Why would I even tell you that for? It won't do you any good."

A sudden thought shot through my mind then and before I even had the courage or the strength to stop my self as I sat bolt right up in bed the thought formed into words and tumbled out of my mouth, "Then train me."

Spike spit out some whisky he was about to swallow and then cursed at himself loudly for moment before going quiet for a minute.

"I'm sorry what the bloody hell did you just ask me to do?"

"Come on Spike you know this blood sucking life better then anyone. If anyone can train me to control this it's you."

Spike laughed. "Harris, let's get one thing clear okay? I'm a vampire you are a ghoul there is no way in hell this is ever gonna work. Not now or in any lifetime."

"If you help me out then I won't tell Buffy that you have sexy dreams about her at night." Once again the words were out of my mouth before I could stop myself.

I really need to learn to keep my mouth shut. I thought trying not to panic at the darkened look of Spike's blue eyes.

"How the bloody hell do you know about that?" Spike asked and immediately I burst out laughing. "Wait, so it's actually true? oh my god! I just took a shot on the dark and guessed!"

I then felt Spike grab a hold of my shirt in a flash and lifted my at least a foot of the bed his eyes shifted now from blue to a menacing yellow and all my laughter died down. Seeing spike in his vampiric form was scary and for a minute or two I thought he was about to end my life and turn me for real.

"Tell no one about this little conversation between us and we got us a deal wanker." Spike said dropping me back on to the bed with slight hard force the pain shot through my injured shoulder as I winced slightly in discomfort.

"Really?" I asked. "You'll really do it?"

"I will do what I can to teach you to control your blood lust at least but the other stuff will be challenging so we might have to call in reinforcements for that."

"Reinforcements?" I asked. "Like who?"

"I hate to say this I really hate to bloody flipping say this but..." Spike cut himself off for a moment as he regained his composure slowly returning to normal.

"We might have to call in Angel."

Oh great! I thought. Just flipping great! As if dealing with one vampire wasn't bad enough now I have to deal with two? I might as well be a dead man walking at this point cause that's exactly what I will be if Buffy or even worse the Watcher's council finds out what I've become.

Just when I thought my screwed up ,life couldn't get any worse, welcome to the life of being a blood sucking flesh eating graveyard dwelling freak of nature!

TOO BE CONTINUED... Will this actually work out for the best? Will Xander manage to be able to control himself before Buffy finds out what's happened? Or will Giles find out before she does? Find out in the next chapter which will be coming out as soon as I can get it. Hope your enjoying reading and if you did please fill free to pm me any ideas you might have for future chapter ideas and what you would like to see happen within the story!