3A/N: I hate school, school hates me, it's a mutual relationship and I need some failure Tachikawa in my life. I wrote this up kind of quick, just because the idea came to me yesterday and I had to write it even though I have exams for my college class in a week of two and the teacher dumped a bunch of work on the class to waste time until then. While this was fast and not my best work, I hope it's still enjoyable :D
Tachikawa yawned, exhaling with a deep sigh as he cracked an eye open to look at his computer. On the screen was one sentence of what was supposed to be a full-length report of the shift of Defense Duty his squad had just finished. However, even after twenty minutes of sitting at his desk, his body crumpled into a sulky slump that oozed negativity and lack of work ethic, all he'd managed to write was the date and his squad name.
"February 18th, 2016, Tachikawa squad Defense Duty report..." he trailed off, reading his sentence aloud to only himself. Tachikawa frowned. In the beginning, he had thought that he'd blow through the report in five minutes, then be on his way to the Rank War booths for some fighting. Evidently, he had been extremely wrong. Sure, the first sentence was pretty easy, but that was because it was made using a template that all agents were required to use for their Defense Duty reports. Date, squad name, and the words 'Defense Duty report'. Simple. Easy. That couldn't be said for what came after, though, and the thought caused Tachikawa to groan loudly.
"Tachikawa-san, are you seriously still struggling with the reports?" Izumi asked from across the room. The dirty blond boy was facing backwards in his chair, leaning against the back rest with a mixture of amusement and disbelief on his face.
Izumi's question was met with another louder groan and the sound of Tachikawa smacking his head on his desk. Izumi himself had to cover his mouth with his arm to keep from laughing at his captain. The man was twenty years old, the strongest Attacker in Border besides the great Masafumi Shinoda, a university student, and the rival of a guy who could see the future, but he couldn't manage a simple report on something he'd done for two hours that day.
Across the room from Izumi, Tachikawa suddenly got to his feet so fast that his chair fell over. The man didn't even spare it a glance, let alone move to pick it back up, as he headed for the door.
"I'm buying something to drink."
The door swung shut behing Tachikawa, leaving Izumi on his own, staring at his captain's abandoned desk with semi-wide eyes. His surprise quickly shifted into amusement though, and he chuckled to himself as he dropped back down on his chair and continued the game he was playing on his computer.
Down the hall, Tachikawa halted in front of the vending machines, eyes narrowed at the choices he had. Orange juice, grape soda, apple juice, water, tea, and a few other bottles of various other things Tachikawa didn't particularly want to try. He wasn't actually thirsty, but his brain was screaming for sugary apple juice, so he decided to just go with it. Rummaging through his pockets, Tachikawa pulled out a some money and stuck it into the coin slot, then he pushed the button for his juice with just a little more force than necessary.
The vending machine hummed in protest against the work, but did begin to shove Tachikawa's drink off of its shelf. The process was painfully slow, causing Tachikawa to grow impatient. One would think that an organization as important as Border would at least have some decent vending machines that would spit out juice faster than Tachikawa's immobile great-grandmother could sit up.
Suddenly, the machine shuddered, then stopped. Tachikawa's juice was just a few centimeters from the edge of the shelf, so close but not enough so for him to knock it off by shaking the machine. Not that a simple fact like such would stop him.
"Wha- REALLY?!" Tachikawa muttered under his breath, his voice breaking from frustration. He kicked the machine angrily, but didn't even manage to shake its contents. All he got was a sore foot. Next he grabbed the sides of the vending machine and shook it, then tipped it just a little, but his efforts were entirely fruitless. His juice refused to budge.
Sighing, Tachikawa took a step back and eyed his juice. It was three shelves up, not too far, and right in the middle. His arms weren't sticks, but he wasn't Reiji either. In theory, he could simply reach into the machine, grab his juice, then return to his squad room. Easy.
With a quick glance both ways down the hallway to make sure no one was coming, Tachikawa crouched down in front of the vending machine and stuck his arm through the flap at the bottom. His brow knitted in concentration, the young man crept his hand up past the first shelf, then the second. Reaching the third was quite a stretch, but he leaned into the machine as far as he could go, and a victorious smile split his face when his fingers brushed his juice. Good, now all he had to do was-
"Huh?"
Tachikawa tried to lean away from the machine, planning to jam his arm back into the outlet just a little further so he could get his juice, but he couldn't move. An experimental tug or four revealed that he had somehow managed to pin his arm against, under, or behind something. Whatever had happened, it all lead to the same conclusion; he was stuck.
A small sigh escaped Tachikawa's lips as he slumped against the machine. A small ember in his heart was telling him to fight and to keep trying, but he couldn't. He'd used up all of his energy trying to write a report and trying to get his juice, leaving him with none remaining for an escape. His arm was stuck, and he was doomed to a fate of sitting against a vending machine where anyone could walk by, laugh a little, and maybe even take a picture or video. He would be helpless to stop them. All Tachikawa could do was hope that no one else would decide to venture into the hallway, and for the love of all things living, he hoped that Izumi would not decide to suddenly start caring about his captain enough that he'd go see what was taking him so long, since the trip shouldn't have taken more than a few minutes.
With another sigh, one that Tachikawa kept silent so he wouldn't catch the attention of anyone in the nearby rooms and hallways, the young man closed his eyes and tried to relax. To relax his arm would supposedly make it easier to get out. Unfortunately though, relaxation was impossible the moment he heard a familiar voice behind him. Tachikawa's eyes flew open and his body tensed. He would rather Kido himself had walked by rather than the person who was standing a few feet away with a far too amused smile on his face.
"What's this, Tachikawa-san?"
-000-
Earlier in the day, Jin saw it. While skimming through the futures of the people around him, he spotted the funniest of scenes in the future of his rival. The image of Tachikawa with his arm trapped in a vending machine was priceless, and it made Jin wish he could take pictures of what he saw with his Side Effect, though that was mostly because he didn't think Tachikawa would actually do something so stupid. Of course that only made Jin laugh louder when he turned the corner of a hallway in HQ to see none other than Kei Tachikawa sitting on the floor with his arm trapped in a vending machine.
"Hey, stop laughing! You saw this didn't you? Why didn't you say anything?" Tachikawa asked accusingly. Jin laughed.
"Honestly, I decided to give you the benefit of the doubt. I didn't - I didn't think you'd actually - do it!" the brunette managed, choking on laughter as he spoke. It took a moment, but Jin managed to force himself to calm down before he pulled a muscle from laughing so hard, plus he was sure Tachikawa would overheat if his face got any redder.
"Whatever, just get me out of here!" Tachikawa hissed, glancing around. Jin was so loud that he was surprised no one had showed up to see what had Border's famous, self-proclaimed Power Elite choking on air.
"Hmm, I guess I could do that, couldn't I? Or, maybe I could just stand here and watch the show. Oh! I bet Kido-san, Shinoda-san, and Rindo-san would want to see this!" Jin teased, his finger grazing over his phone in his pocket. The gesture caused Tachikawa to jerk away from the machine, which followed him and tilted slightly. The action caused a new future to appear in Jin's mind. If he didn't help, Tachikawa would keep trying to get out. If everything went wrong, the machine would topple and fall right on Tachikawa, crushing him to death. As funny as watching his rival struggle was, Jin wasn't up for another death on his conscience.
"Jin!"
"Fine, Tachikawa-san. But you have to promise that you won't try to maim, injure, or kill me once you're free," Jin said, the skin around his ice blue eyes crinkling slightly with amusement.
"As long as that doesn't apply to Rank Wars it's fine. Now get me out!" Tachikawa whined, tugging on his arm again. It caused him to wince in pain, and he started to wonder if Jin actually knew how to get him out or if he was just teasing. After all, his Side Effect was foresight, not the best ways to get someone out of a vending machine.
"Straighten your arm as much as possible, then let it relax. After that, just don't move," Jin instructed, crouching down next to his rival. Tachikawa did as he was told, then watched as Jin quickly bent his arm this way and that way, easily sliding it out of the vending machine.
"Finally," Tachikawa huffed, standing as he stretched his fingers and rubbed his arm, which had gone numb while it was stuck.
The sound of an elbow hitting metal caused Tachikawa to spin around, and he was met with the sight of Jin rattling the machine by ramming his arm into it with a surprising amount of force.
"What-" Tachikawa began, but he stopped when his juice hit the bottom of the vending machine. The confusion and slight shock of what had just happened caused him to do nothing but stare dumbly as Jin grabbed the can from the outlet flap and held it out to him.
"You have to hit the sides a bit if your stuff gets stuck," Jin said, pulling a few coins out of his pocket after Tachikawa finally took his drink. The younger agent slid them into the machine, then pressed the button for orange juice. It slowly slid off the shelf, the landed at the bottom of the machine with a loud 'thud'.
"I'll keep that in mind," Tachikawa decided, popping the tab on the top of his juice. It was cold and sweet, just the way he liked it. Not exactly worth all of his troubles, though.
"Tachikawa-san, aren't you forgetting something? You know...a report?" Jin asked with a smug grin. Tachikawa cocked his head to the side in confusion, taking a long swig of juice that he proceeded to spit down his front when he finally caught on to what his rival was saying.
"SHIT, THE REPORT!"
Too caught up in rushing back to his squad room, Tachikawa didn't realize that he had juice dripping from his face and shirt, nor did he hear Jin's laughter echoing down the hall after him.