A Christmas Greeting

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to JK Rowling

N.B. I am in no way trying to alter characters, this merely tickled me. Enjoy!

Albus Dumbledore: Tom! TOM!

Voldemort: You know Albus, this is without a doubt the worse idea you've ever had!

Albus Dumbledore chuckles: I know! Well, it would do you some good to experience torture for once!

Voldemort: I'm not doing it!

Albus Dumbledore: Oh yes you are!

Voldemort: NO I am not!

Albus Dumbledore: Tom, it's literally two seconds of your time!

Voldemort: I don't care! It's wrong and completely against everything I believe in!

Albus Dumbledore: It's no good trying to disparate, I've fool-proofed the room.

Voldemort: You do know that's basically torture?

Albus Dumbledore: Well, for you!'

Voldemort: Look, I don't see why I should!'

Albus Dumbledore: Well, I don't see why you shouldn't! Come on! You used to love this time of year!'

Voldemort: What do you mean? I was completely indifferent.

Albus Dumbledore: Tom come on! Please! It's two words! Two words and then you can go, I promise!'

Voldemort slowly appears dressed in his black suit and glowering.

Voldemort: I hate you, you know that?

Albus Dumbledore chuckles : Yes, I know, look come on! You've got lots of fans!

Voldemort: Seriously?

Albus Dumbledore: Yeah! God knows why! I think they sympathise with your backstory.

Voldemort: I told you to keep quiet about that!

Albus Dumbledore: Why are you so ashamed? It's not your fault!

Voldemort: Whatever!

Albus Dumbledore: Look, come on! Voldemort moves reluctantly towards him and looks in front Well? Smile then! Voldemort forces himself to smile. Oh come on Tom! You can do better than that!

Voldemort: It's the best you're going to get!

Albus Dumbledore sighs: Fine!

They both look in front and Albus Dumbledore beams

Albus Dumbledore: On behalf of Tom and myself – I would just like to wish all you wonderful people, young and old, witches, wizards and muggles alike a very merry Christmas and a happy new year! Tom?

Voldemort: Yes, whatever – Merry Christmas.

Lighting fades

Dumbledore: See? Didn't hurt did it?

Voldemort: Yeah!..Wait a minute, what did you mean Wizards and muggles alike! You tricked me!

Dumbledore: My dear Tom, I do not have a clue to what you are referring! Oh, Merry Christmas by the way.

Voldemort: Yeah, yeah whatever!

The end.