Disclaimer: Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable belong to Disney. I'm using them in the spirit of creativity.
"Bruce. What do you think?" said Ron, a hint of twinkle in his eyes.
"Bruce … Bruce … Bruce …" Kim laved and rolled the name on her tongue, checking how it sounded. "Hmm, that's a pretty nice name," she decided.
"And for middle name, I was thinking about my uncle – Wayne. I always liked him. In fact, I have him to thank for my refined palate. He was the one who introduced me to all the Mexican delicacies – Tacos, nachos, burritos, chalupas and whatnot," Ron said, a cunning smile sweeping across his face.
"Bruce Wayne Stoppable?!" Kim exclaimed. "You might as well go ahead and name him Batman Stoppable!"
"I would but I know you won't let me! Just think about it. What with the combination of my mystical monkey powers and your kung-fu skills, he'd practically be a Batman! Why not name him as such and make it official? Please Kim. Please let me name him Bruce Wayne," Ron pleaded, touching the brake pedal and slowing down in order to be able to look at her.
"Listen Honey, I have nothing against the name per se but it's too risky. What if Batman isn't considered as cool then as he is now? What if Green Lantern or Ant Man or any other superhero overtakes him by-"
"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! You're comparing the Dark Knight with the likes of Green Lantern and Ant Man? I don't think you know what you're saying, KP. Green Lantern sucks with the power of a thousand vacuum cleaners. Look up the figures of the movie if you don't believe me. And Ant Man – well, he's Ant Man! A superhero named after the world's tiniest insect? The creators must have been high when they came up with that idea. What's next? Grasshopper Man, Beetle Man-"
"Uh, Ron, Spider Man ring a bell?"
"Well, Spider Man is in a different league. Spiders are cool … and scary." He visibly shuddered and continued, "But let's drift back to the original topic, shall we? Promise me you'll consider Bruce with an open mind," Ron said, smoothly steering the car across the lanes of the freeway and down the controlled-access route.
"Okay, I promise I'll consider it," Kim said while simultaneously thinking: But I know what the outcome would be.
"Thank you, KP. Now that one of my name is on the table, let's put one of yours on too. Do you have a name in mind?"
"As a matter of fact, I do." She paused for effect before proudly announcing, "Richard."
Her pronouncement caused Ron to transgress from his lane and a sedan to their right honked in warning. He corrected his path and with a shocked expression on his face, exclaimed, "Richard?! You know you're not giving birth to a ninety year old, right?"
"Oh c'mon, Ron. It's a sophisticated name."
"Yeah, for a ninety year old maybe. I'm pushing it off the table. Richard is OFF THE TABLE," Ron said in a stern voice.
"Well, then I might as well veto Bruce. Didn't like it much anyway," Kim replied in an equally stern voice.
Ron took a deep breath. After spending ten years of his life as the boyfriend of the woman sitting beside him, he had come to realize one thing. Confrontation with Kim didn't achieve much. Even if he won the argument, she would just put on her puppy-dog pout and he would melt like butter. Alternatives needed to be devised and he was ready to wield one now.
Appealing to her ego seemed like a good plan. "Oh, KP, I'm sorry if I came on a little too harsh. I simply wanted to convey that Richard doesn't have the same ring to it that Bruce does, you know. Besides, you're capable of coming up with so much better. I know you are."
Out of the corner of his eyes, he watched Kim and saw the seed he had planted in her head bloom as her rigid features mellowed. "Perhaps, you're right. Richard does sound old and boring. Gimme a minute and I'll come up with an alternative."
"Of course," he said and in the same breath mumbled, "Or maybe an hour, or a day, or a month, or a year, or ten years, or better yet, never."
"Nothing, nothing. You go on and zero in on a name."
A minute later, Kim gleefully clapped her hands and screamed, "I have it! Behold … Benedict Stoppable."
"Benedict? Really?" Ron snapped.
"Oh, I didn't know I was going to be fathering the future pope!"
Half a minute passed and there wasn't any retort from Kim. Strange. Ron glanced at her and saw she was facing away from him, her reflection in the window glass revealing the tears streaming down her cheeks.
Oh, not the hormones again!
Seven months into her pregnancy, hormones had started kicking in and messing up her mood. There was no telling when she'd be laughing or crying, what would make her scream at someone and what would cause her to curl up on the divan with the neighbor's cat purring at her side.
At once, Ron maneuvered the car and parked it on the side of the road. He turned to her and took her in his arms.
His loving embrace broke all dams on her tears and Kim started sobbing loudly into the crook of his neck. "You probably think (sobs) I'm a big dodo, coming (sobs) up with crappy names for our (sobs) baby, don't you? I'm a total (sobs) idiot."
Ron lovingly smoothed her hair – God, how much he loved to run his hands through those silky strands! – and said, "No, darling. That's not the truth at all. You're smart and intelligent, and you know I know that."
Kim retracted from his embrace and looked into his face with her flushed and puffy green eyes. "You really think (sobs) I'm smart and intell-(sobs)-igent?"
Ron smiled. "And lovely. Look at the glow on your face. The cons of the hormones aside, this pregnancy thing is really doing wonders to your natural beauty." He leaned in and stole a kiss from her lips.
Finally a smile from his love.
"You know what? Now that I think about it, Benedict does sound like a unique name. I mean we could both use a little … religion (?) in our daily lives," said Ron.
"You think so?" Kim asked, hopeful.
He pecked her nose in the adorable way he did and pushing his foot down on the accelerator, said, "Yeah, I do. Ladies and gentlemen, Benedict is very much on the table. Not Richard, though. Never Richard."
A minute or two passed in silence and then Ron heard Kim gasp. Her hand was on her bulging abdomen.
"What? Is there a problem? Are you experiencing pain or anything?" Ron asked, glancing at her, his face distorted with worry.
Kim shook her head. "The baby just kicked. I was thinking about a name and the baby kicked. I think he approves."
She took his free hand and pressed it on her tummy. "Ronald Jr. Stoppable," she said in the softest of tones and the baby kicked again, eliciting a smile from his father.
"Well, I guess it's neither Bruce nor Benedict then," said Ron. "Hmm, Ronald Jr. Stoppable. It does have a nice ring to it."