Disclaimer: Puny fan fiction writer does not own Minsc and Boo! No one owns Boo but Minsc! Nor Minsc but Boo! I am certain! I have paperwork somewhere… Boo is not sure who owns Harry Potter, maybe his witch does. That is how it worked in the snowy fields of Rashemen! *Squeak!* What's that, Boo? *Squeak!* Harry Potter is owned by J.K. Rowling and we are owned by the corporate owners of the Baldur's Gate's Series? *Squeak!* You heard him! And you should listen! Boo knows about these things…
Harry Potter and the Ranger and the Miniature Giant Space Hamster
Final Showdown
Harry fought his way through the battle and into the Great Hall. Spells whizzed through the air as brave witches and wizards fought the Death Eaters tooth and nail.
Hermione, Luna, and Ginny were holding off Bellatrix Lestrange until Mrs. Weasley stepped up and floored the deranged witch.
Near the Head Table, McGonagall, Flitwick, and Slughorn were fiercely dueling Voldemort, but they were clearly outmatched.
Harry pushed his way through the crowd. When he was in position, he quickly threw off his invisibility cloak and leveled his wand with a scream of righteous fury.
"Expelliarmus!"
But Voldemort proved himself to be worthy of his reputation and nimbly dodged out of the way.
"Potter!" the Dark Lord shouted. "How?"
"This ends here, Tom!" Harry cried.
"That we can agree on!"
Harry brought his wand around again, but Voldemort was too fast. A spell struck his chest and Harry's wand was ripped from his grasp.
"It seems the Killing Curse just won't work on you, Potter," the Dark Lord sneered. "Let's try something more… inventive."
Voldemort prepared to unleash a doubtlessly horrible dark curse, but was interrupted by a savage scream.
"RAAAAGH!" Minsc cried as he leapt at the Dark Lord, his huge sword cleaving through the air. "Okay, Evil, you strutted you badness, now it's Minsc's Turn!"
"What beastly manner of Muggle is this?!" Voldemort asked as he lithely dodged the blade.
"I am Minsc! And I grow tired of shouting battle cries at you, snake-wizard!" he proclaimed as he continued to swing his sword. "Evil, meet my sword! Sword, MEET EVIL!"
Minsc was gaining ground, but the Dark Lord proved to be a match even to the heroic ranger. Voldemort ducked as the sword slashed through the air above his head. He whirled around and pointed his wand.
"Corpus Immobulus!" he cried.
Minsc froze in mid-swing, his body immobilized by the Body-Freezing Curse.
"GAH!" the ranger struggled, "what manner of Evil sorcery is this?!" He couldn't move, but he still somehow managed to speak.
Voldemort stalked forward and reached out to grasp Minsc's chin in his claw-like fingers.
"You're nothing more than a beast, you filthy Muggle!" he scoffed.
"Minsc will be free! And then your Evil backside will be kicked until it is no more!"
"No," Voldemort replied. "I think you will die!"
He leveled his wand at the ranger.
Suddenly a loud, high-pitched squeal pierced the noise of the battle raging all around them. Boo leapt from Minsc's shoulder, his tiny arms and claws extended, and latched on to Voldemort's face.
"Go for the eyes, Boo! GO FOR THE EYES!" Minsc cheered.
"AHH!" Voldemort screamed in fright and pain as the hamster continued its attack. The Dark Lord flailed about and even dropped his wand as he desperately grabbed at his own face. After a moment he collapsed to the ground and was still.
Suddenly Minsc found himself free of the Body-Freezing Curse. He quickly brandished his sword once again.
Harry slowly crept forward, warry of some unexpected treachery from the motionless Dark Lord. He nudged the body with his foot.
Voldemort didn't respond.
Harry pushed on his shoulder, and Voldemort rolled onto his back. His face was frozen in a silent scream of horror and pain. There was nothing but a blood-smeared mess where his eyes used to be.
"Gah!" Harry jumped back in fright as Boo popped up out of one of Voldemort's now empty eye-sockets with a joyous squeak.
"Ha HA!" Minsc cried in jubilation, "The eyes of Evil are Boo's favorite snack!"
"What." Harry said in disbelief.
With the Dark Lord dead, the Death Eaters lost their will to fight and the battle quickly halted. Hermione ran over.
"Harry!" she cried as she threw her arms around his neck. "You're alive!"
"Indeed our Harry the Hero is!" Minsc proclaimed as he thudded the young wizard on the back. "The plans for your Heroic Funeral shall be canceled forthwith!"
"But how?" Hermione asked incredulously. "How did you manage to kill Voldemort?"
"I didn't" Harry numbly responded.
"Then who?"
Boo squeaked and leapt up onto Minsc's shoulder.
"He did," Harry said while pointing.
"Minsc?"
"No."
"Boo?!"
"Indeed!" Minsc cried as he lifted the hamster high over his head. "Did I not tell you that Boo is the mightiest of warriors?!"
"Wait a minute," Hermione said, "you're telling me that the prophesized 'power he knows not' was a hamster?!"
"Voldepants knew nothing of Boo's power!" Minsc exclaimed. "As the only miniature giant space hamster in the world, how could he know of him? And besides, Voldepants is not the type to keep a hamster!"
Harry and Hermione could do nothing but stand and stare, their mouths hanging open in disbelief.
Minsc continued to shout his hamster's praises.
"This battle will be forever remembered! From this day on we shall be known as the greatest of heroes! My friends, our hamster borne fury will be so great the bards will run their quills dry keeping up with our adventures! Ink will be scarce and we shall be legends!"
And thus it was that Boo, the bravest and fiercest miniature giant space hamster in all the realms, defeated the worst Dark Lord in history.
AN: Well, that's the last completed scene that I have. At least for now. A few of your reviews have given me some ideas though. I just need to find the time to flesh them out into interesting (and hopefully funny) chapters. So it might be a while until the next post.
Thoughts?
Thanks for your reviews. And thanks for reading!