Curiosity Killed The Cook
by Kaline Reine

Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece or any of the characters/settings. This is just a fanfiction story.

WARNINGS: This story contains (or may contain) graphic adult content and language, explicit sex scenes, yaoi, possible non-con or dubcon, violence, gore, cursing, adult themes, etc. I do not censor my writing, but I do my best to warn people about the subject matter and potential subject matter. So if you don't like that kind of thing or can't handle it, then I suggest not reading this story. You have been warned. Also, I know this doesn't follow canon but it doesn't have to, that's why it's a fanfic. xD


Chapter 3:

So they had an agreement; an arrangement.

And Sanji could not believe his luck. He also could not be more nervous.

He lied in his hammock, barely able to sleep that night. It was rare that anything or anyone would actually disturb his sleep patterns in such a manner. This time it was an anyone. A certain green-haired anyone who would not leave his thoughts, no matter how hard he tried to keep his mind off of the other pirate. He'd given up trying to keep his mind on something else long ago.

It was interesting to note that he hadn't seen him at all since their earlier encounter, when they had made this crazy agreement. Zoro was nowhere to be found. He'd finished up doing the dishes and gone to bed in the men's cabin shortly afterward, but he hadn't seen the swordsman anywhere. In reality, Sanji knew that he was still around outside somewhere. Of course he knew that. It was just that, well... He hadn't technically seen Zoro.

'I wonder if he's suddenly avoiding me...' The blonde mused silently, before recalling that they had been bitter rivals for a very long time, and it was not unusual for them to go long periods of time avoiding each other anyway.

The crew's first mate had agreed- no, volunteered- to take the first ship watch of the night. Sanji had overheard and "coincidentally" signed up for second watch. That should give them plenty of time.

'Besides, how long can a handjob take?'

But it wasn't just from anyone. It was from Zoro... His rival, the one that he could always count on for a good fight, and the one who irritated him and got under his skin so much. To think of him in any kind of physically pleasing way like that just seemed so wrong. At first he'd thought it was all a joke of some sort, but the look in the swordsman's eyes told him that he was actually serious. He couldn't really bring himself to go through with it though.

No. No, he couldn't. He would just have to tell him.

Sanji's hands shook as he lit yet another cigarette, not daring to venture outside to fully enjoy it. He was out there, after all...


Before they knew it, the time had come... Midnight had stricken.

"I have to say," It still wasn't half as striking as the smirk that the swordsman dared to wield. "I'm not surprised you didn't bother to show up, cook."

He was speaking very deliberately in a low voice, just above a whisper, but a telltale growl was still present.

"Tch... You think I would?" Sanji took a puff from his cigarette nonchalantly, though he'd only lit it in an effort to help calm his nerves in the first place.

"What did you say?!" The green-haired swordsman snarled, still somehow careful not to raise his voice too much, so as not to wake the rest of the crew.

The others slumbered nearby, oblivious to the scene going on right in front of them. Luffy mumbled something unintelligible in his sleep, probably about meat if the drool slipping from the corner of his mouth was anything to go by... And Usopp tossed and turned, grumbling about gigantic monsters and saving Kaya. It was so corny, it nearly made the blonde smack himself in the face. The others were silent.

"Be quiet moron. Look, I never agreed to anything, so just leave."

He had actually slept in his clothes for this very reason. He didn't want to appear too eager or let himself be too vulnerable. Especially when he planned to let him down, gently or not.

Zoro's eyes gained their usual demonic look, this one especially menacing, as if he were taking a stand against some monumental enemy. "You know what? No."

"What- You can't just say no!"

"Why not? You did." He pointed out, one hand on his hip, surprisingly not gripping one of his swords yet, although they clung to his side. It was clear that he was ready for anything. "And for the record, you did say you would. You also participated in-"

And Sanji couldn't have crossed the room fast enough.

One hand flew up to cover Zoro's mouth before he could embarrass him any further. Who knew if the others were really asleep or if they were listening somehow? Pirates couldn't be trusted any further than you could throw them, even ones that happened to be your friends. And even if they happened to have also participate in the activities you did not want mentioned in front of your other friends. He had to shut the swordsman up before he said way too much. He definitely did not want to talk about that kiss, or the fact that he had taken part in it. Not just because it was with another man, but because it was with Zoro specifically.

"Shut up, dumbass marimo!"

Before he could argue his point, he felt a hot wet tongue scrape across the center of his palm, warm and wet. He jerked his hand away on reflex, unable to hold onto his mouth if he was going to do things like that.

'So, he wants to play dirty, does he?' Sanji's curled eyebrow slanted along with the rest of his expression to form a scowl fit to match his rival's.

Determination evident on his face, he grabbed Zoro's wrist before he could pull away. He brought it up, closer to himself, aligning the digits with his mouth. A smirk appeared, as he toyed with the swordsman's clever fingertips, first nibbling them with his lips, before taking the first two into his mouth. They slid all the way to the back of his throat, where he swallowed around them. He wasn't sure how he knew it would have an effect on him. Maybe because Sanji knew that he himself would practically faint if a girl had the nerve to do something like that to him. Even worse if she-

He was broken from his daydream (Or nightdream? Whatever a daydream at night could be called...) by the sight of Zoro jerking his hand away. Before he could argue, that same hand had clamped down over his throat, lightly squeezing in short intervals. He glared right into his rival's single jaded sea-gray eye, thankful that he could hide at least half of his face behind a shimmering curtain of blonde.

"You won't have to worry about the others hearing anymore," Zoro suddenly decided when he felt the touch of that wet tongue along the length of his finger. He found himself wishing- no, demanding- that it was a different length being teased by that talented mouth. "I'm dragging you out of here now. Just like I said I would."

Strong hands latched onto his left leg, throwing him off balance. The cook hit the floor with a dull thud, thankfully slightly muffled by the large rug in the middle of the room. He'd never been so appreciative of Robin's decorating skills before. It really was a shame that he'd never had such a close look at the tapestry until now. Although it didn't feel very good when his skin was scraped across it... He turned onto his side to avoid getting rug-burn on his back when the first mate dragged him away.

"But, you can't-" Sanji sobbed brokenly, hands clawing desperately at the ground. "It's not fair- You, wait a seco- Oi! H-hang on!"

Zoro proceeded to drag him right out of the room and across the main deck of their ship. "Yep." He smiled pleasantly, enjoying the cool, crisp night air. "Just like I said I would."

"...I hate you." Sanji aimed a kick at the back of his head, but Zoro's free hand was a little bit quicker. "Unhand me, baka!"

"Heh. I will when I'm good and damn ready." His vicious smirk only grew. It sprawled across his face like some sort of possessed crescent moon.

Once he'd dragged Sanji all the way to one side of the ship, headed toward the stern, and successfully manhandled him back to his feet, Zoro turned to face him. Still grinning like the devil.

"First, we need to talk about ground rules."

"Ground rules?" The cook swallowed nervously.

"Yeah," Zoro looked at him, regarding him with a slight tilt of his head. "Like if you're not comfortable with making out and want to keep it limited to... To just getting the job done, then that's fine. If it would make it, uhhh..."

He paused, hesitating.

"What?"

"If it would make it less ga- Umm... I mean, if it'd be easier for you that way?"

The cook took a deep breath to steady himself. It was painfully obvious that both men were blushing, and the way he was just staring at him like that, so cold and calculating, just made it that much worse.

"Look, can't we just get on with it? We could... Ah, well..." Sanji rubbed the back of his neck nervously with his free hand, before taking another drag from the little white stick he held in his other hand. Then he straightened his tie. "We could just do what comes naturally?"

"We did already make out, so I guess that'd be alright. Whatever you want is fine with me."

It seemed that maybe Zoro was actually concerned for his discomfort. He didn't want to scare him away or anything. The blonde just stood there, waiting for him to make the first move. He cleared his throat, waiting impatiently.

"So..." The cook rolled his wrist around, moving his hand in a circular motion with his fingers upturned, as if to say 'come on already' or something along those lines. "We doing this or not, marimo?"

He didn't want to seem overly eager, but he was getting impatient. They only had so much time... It had been better before, when it had just happened effortlessly. Now that they lacked the spontaneity of their previous encounter, it was a bit awkward.

'Should I make a move? Or should I just forget it? Maybe he was only in it to help me and isn't really that interested... But he did wake me up and drag me out of bed for this. Maybe-' He was already advancing on the swordsman. 'Oh, what the hell?'

The cook was stopped with a stern hand before he could make contact. It was embarrassing and caused a fresh blush to break out across his face.

"I know of a place where we won't be disturbed. It's a little risky, and the space might be a tad cramped, but nothing too bad."

Sanji was barely listening. He was staring at his lips as he talked, hoping Zoro wouldn't be able to read his thoughts as he idly wondered what they would feel like if he bit them... He found himself nodding slowly in mock understanding as the swordsman dragged him down into one of the lifeboats by his wrists. The first mate lifted the red and white tarp and held it up, with one hand extended, waiting for the blonde to join him.

"In... In there?" He shifted his weight to one side, unsure. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah. It's the only place they'd never think to look for us. It's quiet, it's private, and no one else would think of looking for us here. As long as we aren't too loud, it'll be fine."

"...I make no promises."

"Heh," Zoro smirked at the mental images that thought evoked. "Then I'll just have to find ways to make sure that filthy mouth of yours is occupied."

"But I'm supposed to be watching the ship, remember?" The cook was fully prepared to say no at this point and outright refuse, but Zoro grabbed his hand and started to pull him under the familiar blue cover anyway. The look on his face made Sanji infinitely more curious. "Fine, but if something happens because I was distracted, you can't blame me."

"Nothing's gonna happen, dumbass! Stop being such a coward and come here!"

The swordsman pulled Sanji flush against him. He did not miss the way their bodies lined up perfectly with one another. The cook adjusted, twisting himself so that he could lie more comfortably on top of him.

He somehow felt his cock give a good hard jolt at the way Zoro looked at him then. The swordsman was staring at him for all the world like he wanted to eat him alive. And then he pounced, flipping them over with his weight pressing into Sanji's lithe body, feeling his muscles tense and harden with every touch...

It was too much. And at the same time, not enough. Not nearly enough...

Lips were on his, and hands... Hands were everywhere. Their tongues carefully touched inside the joint cavern formed by their mouths. The cook ran a hand experimentally over Zoro's frame, feeling his pecs through his shirt before dropping down to his sexy abs. He really was very attractive. How had he not noticed this before? The other man ran his hands over Sanji's body, moving up his back and then down over his ass, cupping both cheeks to pull him even closer.

Sanji groaned when he felt Zoro's hardness rub against him and he realized that he was hard too. His cock pulsed and ached more the longer he had to wait for relief. He wasn't used to this sweet torture. He'd been denied his release earlier, so he was especially horny. His own hands that had been often used to prepare so many perfect meals were working overtime on his own belt buckle. A soft clink let him know that he'd been successful. Finally his length sprang free of the confines of his pants and Zoro wasted no time in grabbing it.

"Mmmmnn..." He moaned against Zoro's mouth, arching into his skillful touch.

His member was smooth like silk but hard as stone. It strained with the powerful surge of arousal that flooded through his entire being, a bit of precum dribbling from the tip. The swordsman was also very good with his hands, and slid them up and down the length of it, noting the thick girth and large size. Still, it was nothing compared to Zoro's, if what he'd felt earlier was anything to go by.

"Sanji..." Zoro said his name for the first time in a long time. That was all he could manage at the moment, and he stopped trying to talk, rolling his eyes back into his head with a soft blissful sigh.

"L-let me... Ahhh..." He'd tried to speak but was interrupted by a lascivious moan. Sanji was glad the others were asleep at this hour and no one else was supposed to have watch until the next morning. "Let me feel you... too... Nnnnhh!" Sanji let out a whine.

"Heh. Gladly." Zoro shimmied out of his pants, the dark green fabric oddly more cotton-like than Sanji remembered. He took the opportunity to remove his haramaki and pull his robe off along with it. His swords were laid to one side, on top of his clothes.

There it was... The moment when all rational thought had finally left him completely. The cook drank in the sight of his rival's beautifully muscled physique, his gaze eventually landing on his throbbing cock. It pulsed with power, and the size was even more impressive than Sanji's own, although it was nothing to laugh at either. And Zoro definitely wasn't laughing. Especially when the blonde leaned down to get a closer look. He knew they had agreed to keep this whole thing to just a simple handjob to ease each other's tension and all, but...

His tongue came out, limber and pink, and he licked all the way up Zoro's hard cock, from the base to the tip. The swordsman let out a long pent-up moan, letting his head fall back onto one of the life-jackets they'd cleverly stashed on board this small boat. It made for a nice temporary pillow.

"Watch it, shit cook..." A strong hand rested on Sanji's scalp, fingers tangling through his hair. "Take it slow."

The swordsman pulled him away. The cook only looked up at him with pure desire in his bright blue eyes. His face was flushed and he was panting a bit... Zoro made a note to take a mental picture of him like that for later. Sanji looked, well... Beautiful. And he hadn't been prepared for such an overwhelming thing. He knew the moment that the blonde had taken his cock into his mouth that he was highly likely to just cum down his throat right away. And that wasn't what he wanted, they needed to take their time with this. He wanted to enjoy it properly.

When Zoro had pulled him away in such an abrasive way, it pissed Sanji off. A sullen look was his reward. The blonde shrugged it off though, not wanting to completely spoil the moment. Besides, there might be a chance for that further down the line-

'No! What am I even thinking?!' Sanji could only shake those strange feelings off. 'This won't happen again. And definitely not with him!'

His hands found their way to the buttons of his striped dress shirt. Zoro was undressing him, apparently having gotten too impatient to wait for him to finish doing it on his own.

"Okay, this is weird..." The blonde commented, pulling away from him. "It's kind of... I can undress myself, damn it!"

"Suit yourself."

Zoro lied back on his arms, content to enjoy the show. He tried to relax. Sanji flipped him off in the process, but eventually got his shirt off. The swordsman did not seem disappointed, if the way his eye raked over the cook's pale exposed skin was anything to go by. He wanted to reach out and touch him, but knowing how Sanji was taking this, it probably wasn't a good idea to push him too far too fast.

He waited for Sanji to make the next move, staring him down with hunger and lust in his eyes. It made the cook shiver, but he slowly reached out and tentatively let his hands trail over Zoro's torso. He stifled a moan, taking his time and feeling every inch of hardened muscle, as it flexed beneath his fingertips.

And that wasn't the only thing that was hard... He noticed that even the slightest touch from him caused the swordman's erection to grow even bigger than it had been previously.

'Just how big IS he?' Sanji wondered, noting that he was actually more of a grower than a shower, and filing that information away for later. ...If there was even going to be a later, that is. Not that there necessarily was.

His mind turned to mush when he felt Zoro's mouth covering his own again, their breath mingling together for one brief moment before they touched. He moved his hips experimentally, earning a groan from the swordsman. He felt himself slowly losing control, giving in to the waves of pleasure that overwhelmed him, succumbing to his lust.

But something was off...

Both of them had failed to notice the true result of their constant rocking motions and powerful thrusts... The little lifeboat swayed to and fro on it's hangers, the ropes groaning with untold effort. But it was soon forgotten when Sanji nipped at Zoro's ear, his teeth just grazing the shiny golden bars that hung there, and setting off a flurry of butterflies within the swordsman's stomach. Three... As if to offset the balance from the chaos his swords created. It was ironic but also perfect.

There was a loud creak, followed by a snap!

'Uh-oh...' They both seemed to think, vaguely. There was no time for words.

The sound of water was a little too close for comfort. It didn't sound like they were on board the ship anymore... It was too close. And it was getting closer...

Suddenly, there was a sharp pain, and everything faded away.


A/N: 'This won't happen again.' Suuuure, Sanji... Just keeeeep telling yourself that. ;D Yay, this is out just in time for Zoro's birthday! Happy Birthday Marimo-kun! You gets a Sanji! :3

And I know their ship doesn't "really" have lifeboats, or at least maybe not idk, but let's just pretend that it does because that's sort of the premise of this whole little scenario. Sorry the idea is kinda lame and not better or more clever, but it gets the job done, lol. (I do have good ideas sometimes, I swear!)

I am very sorry for the long wait. My computer died thanks to my kitties, but I got a new one now and I'm so happy! ;w;

NOTE: I have also gone back over the first two chapters and edited them so they will be a bit better, hopefully. I didn't make any major changes but wanted to let readers know anyway. I hope I did good so far. All feedback is welcomed.

-Kaline