A/N Hello my dear readers I am back, I hope you are all in good health and stay Safe during this terrible pandemic. Today I decide to not write a new shot but instead write a part 2 on the one shot I did in fearing to love. If you don't remember, its a shot between Dick and Damian and basically Dick and Damian have a heated argument about how Damian doesn't accept their love. Anyway if you haven't read go ahead and check it out if you want. Now without further delay I should say that the all the characters don't belong to me but DC and that it's time to get on with the story.
A couple days after the heated argument between Dick and Damian. Everything went back to normal, well as normal as it could get in this house(manor). Everything and everyone was the same except the fact that Damian started to open up a little more to Dick, just a bit but Dick thought of it as in improvement and was glad about his little brother.
However, one night everything decided to just fall apart. The night was going like any other, Bruce and Damian were out in a patrol along side with Tim and Jason. Dick was on a mission so he couldn't be with them during patrol but he was back before they returned to the cave from said patrol.
Dick was sitting in the chair, looking through some files in the bat computer on a case he was currently working on when he heard the distant sound of a car and two bikes coming closer and closer. He ignored it and get back to his work knowing exactly to whom this vehicles belong to and continued with his work.
A few seconds later the vehicles came into view and came to a stop. The second Bruce opened the window/door of the batmobile, Damian got himself out of the car fumming.
"DON'T YOU DARE RUN AWAY DAMIAN!" Boomed a voice making Dick jump from his seat. Turning around he saw an angry looking Batman with his mask down and a Robin almost reaching the lockers to change and leave, stoping abruptly when his Father voice was heard but he said nothing in return.
Red hood and Red Robin are taking of their helmets and getting off of their bikes. They look tired but stay in their place waiting to see how the scene in front of them is going to play out.
"YOU CAN'T KEEP DISOBEYING MY ORDERS DAMIAN!" Bruce was furious, if it was possible smoke would getting out of his ears by now. Damian remained in his place saying nothing only clutching his fists
"Bruce calm down, your veins are starting to show. What happened?" Dick walked towards Bruce trying to find out what happened during patrol.
"IT WAS JUST ONE ORDER, NOBODY DIE!" finally answered Damian his fist still clutched with his back facing his Father.
"DAMIAN, YOU DISOBEYED MY DIRECT ORDERS, AGAIN, AND ALMOST KILLED SOMEONE. I HAVE REPEATEDLY TOLD YOU JUSTICE NOT VENGEANCE BUT YOU-"
"IF I WANTED HIM DEAD HE WOULD BE DEAD BY NOW AND YOU KNOW IT" Damian cut off his father, finally turning around to face him with an angry look.
"Do not interrupt me when I am talking to you." Stated Bruce with an icy tone "It doesn't matter if you killed him or not, you almost took his life. This is not the League of Assassins, I have told you again and again, that killing is forbidden and whatever you learn to that god forsaken place to forget it. You are groun-..."
"Every time when we go out at night I force myself to refrain from my deadly training that was drilled into my mind since I was born; And now what? You are going to ground me again from being Robin... Don't need I will save you the trouble, I Quit..." Cutting off his Father again, Damian removes with a swift move his mask, throws it to the ground and runs out of the room.
"Damian wait..." Dick tried to call him back but he had already left. He went to the spot that Damian was standing minutes ago and kneelled down to pick up the fallen black mask.
The rest of the people inside the cave stayed silent where they stood not knowing how to respond. Dick look at them hard wanted to know what the hell happened during the patrol. Slowly walking towards then a single word left his lips with a tone that left no room for discussion
"There is not much to say Dick you got the grasp of it" begun Tim
"Basically the Demon Spawn left his spot and he almost killed the bad guy" added Jason
"The Demon Brat is a freaking killing machine, he is dangerous, he almost killed the man without a second thought and he doesn't even regretted it one bit. His mother and Grandfather are dead so why does he keep killing? It is not like they are here watching his every move waiting to punish him if he doesn't kill everyone in sight, he does this for his own pleasure, he is a mons-"
"Don't you dare finish that word Tim, Damian is not a monster he is a little kid" threatened Dick
"He should act like a kid then"
"Leave it Tim, you too Dick" ordered Bruce
"I can't believe you Bruce, your own son quit-" said in disbelief Dick looking at Bruce before he was cut off by said man
"I said leave it, if he wants to quit let him quit. I have been patient with him when he was first brought here knowing how he was raised but it's been month and he still haven't change, he keeps going back to his Assassin training. He hasn't even make an effort to get along with us" finished Bruce and make his way to the batcomputer.
"Effort needs to be made by both sides. Don't even say you tried because I know that none of you made an effort" stated Dick walking to the batcomputer and closing the file Bruce had just opened.
"What are you doing!?"
"I want to saw you how wrong you are now sit back and watch, the same goes for you too guys. Here...now" commanded Dick opening the security files of the cave and open one that was date almost a week ago forwarding it to a specific time
"You three, are going to sit here and watch that security file while I am going to see how is Damian doing" informed Dick and left the Cave leaving the three men still in their hero costumes to watch the file.
(A/N from here on it will the batcave argument between Dick and Damian appearing in the Screen, it is not necessary to read it and if you wish and remember the part you can skip it and go to what follows after they finished seeing it. It is easily noticeable as it will be in bold)
"Why do you say that you don't need love Damian?... Everybody needs love and you are not the exception" said Dick and took one step towards Damian
"No, you are wrong I don't need anyone's love I'm fine" answered back Damian and took a step away from Dick
"Why are you doing this?" ask frustrated Dick
"Why I'm doing what?"
"Why are you denying the love we are giving you? Everybody needs to feel loved"
"I know how love feels and I hate that feeling. Love is useless, a weakness, the only thing that love is capable of, is to be used in order to manipulate is giving me love to begin with, I didn't notice Todd, Drake, father or maybe mother giving any because I'm 100% sure they don't love me and neither do you" Damian said feeling his eyes watering, but trying to hold the tears back.
"Damian that's not true and you know it, I love you so does the rest of the family they just have a weird way of showing" Dick tried to make Damian see some sense and believe him.
"It's not?" and Damian's tears start to fall unable to hold them back anymore "You don't love me Grayso,n you just felt pity for me because of my past and of who my mother and grandfather is. Todd and Drake don't love me the barely stand me, they hate me they think I'm a monster, a demon spawn as they called me, father doesn't love me either and don't try to deny it because I know it. I can see the look on his face every time he looks at me and he thinks I didn't notice, he just took me in because I'm his son and he doesn't want me to be an assassin like Ras, he is letting me stay in the manor because he feels guilty, the only time he notice me is when I do something bad or Todd and Drake do it and because I'm close by father blames me or when I'm Robin and he has to keep an eye on me because he thinks I'm that stupid that I would go on a killing spree without a second thought. The same thing happened with Talon, he kill the bad guy he rip his heart out with his bare hand because I let him live, because I listen to father and where that took me, father blame me the second he sees the body. There was no blood on my hands Grayson but he still blamed me and the crazy thing is that even if I wanted to, I couldn't rip his heart with my own bare hands I don't have super strength..." sniffs
"And if you think that Talia or Ras love me, then you are fool they tortured me, punished me, made me kill the teachers I was beginning to get attached to, they made me kill my nanny the first person that made me feel loved. If Todd and Drake think that I AM the monster, the demon then what are they supposed to be?" asked Damian with tears falling rapidly from his eyes not showing any sign of stopping it.
"Come on, Grayson answered me what are they supposed to be!? Who cares about me!? Who loves me!? ANSWERED ME! who could love a monster like me, a machine built with only one kill? WHO?!" his leg couldn't keep him up anymore so he fell on the floor crying
"Damian, it's going to be okay Shhh" Dick tried to make Damian stop crying and relax after he came out of his shock when he heard Damian and without second thought he took Damian in his hands and carried him to his room leaving the batcave.
The cave was filled with silence, the only think that could be heard was the faint sound of the security file still playing in the screen. A shaking hand rose slowly and pause the video.
Tim felt so guilty and ashamed, he was so wrong about Damian. He felt like a failure, he called his little brother a monster, a killing machine. How could he be so unconsidered?
Jason was in the same place of mind. He thought the same things about Damian, he called him demon spawn on regular basis and on top of that he is such a hypocrite. How could he possibility blame Damian for killing or his instincts to kill when he himself has killed before and knows how this instincts were drill into his mind, knowing full well it was not a jolly ride.
Bruce felt so ashamed of himself and the guilt was overwhelming and his heart was breaking as he saw he own son breaking down. He failed his son in so many levels, he made him think he was a burden and unloved in his own hone. He have to fix this, he has to saw his son that he is loved and apologize to him for making feel that way. He knows it's going to be hard but he is going to try.
After almost 10 minutes of silence and deep thinking the three heroes came back to the real word with one thought in their mind
"We have to fix this, we were so quick to judge him, without thinking how he must feel or why did he did what he did" urgently said Tim
"He is right Bruce"
"I know Jason, we will go find him but first we have to change and take a shower. We can't go up like this" replied Bruce
The two boys looked at him, wondering what he meant until they remember they were still in their suits, their bloody suits they might add
"Right" they both agree simultaneously and run towards the locker area, disappearing within seconds. Bruce gave a little chuckle shaking his head and followed then soon after.
Damian's room after he left the cave.
Damian basically run to his rooms and close his door with a loud bang. He lean on the door with his back and slide down, slowly tears begun to fall from his eyes. Pathetic he thought he was being so weak, he was crying again, he wanted to stop but his tears kept falling down his cheeks.
He stood there for almost 5 minutes before he decided he need a bath to wash all the blood sweat and tears he was covered with. Slowly but steadily he got up from the floor and drag his feet to the bathroom. He begun to fill his tub with hot water and then proceed by striping off his bloody suit.
Without waiting for his tub to be filled with water he climbed inside, sit down, curled himself laying he head on his knees and stood there with the water slowly rising.
In the meantime
Dick was panicking, after he told the others to sit down and watch the security tape, he went after Damian to see how was he. He firstly, went to the gym thinking that maybe he wanted to let out his anger in an innocent punch bag or dummy but he wasn't there. He then went to the kitchen to get some of Alfred's favourite after patrol cookies but he wasn't there either. He debated on his mind the possibility of him leaving the manor which on itself wasn't something weird as he has done again, multiple times, but a big thunderstorm started while they were inside the cave and now he was afraid of his little brother well being. One thought comfort him though, he hasn't check Damian's room yet. So he climbed the stairs and run to Damian's room.
He stood outside of Damian's room, scared to go inside. Thinking what if Damian isn't in his room either, what I am going to do then. Still, he found some courage to open the door and walk inside. For a minute all hope left him when he noticed the empty room and his Little brother nowhere to be found. He was ready to leave before he noticed a light coming from the bathroom.
"Damian?" Called Dick knocking the door in order to alert Damian of his presence but a reply never came.
"Damian, it's me are you okay?" He tried again but still got no answer. He rested his head on the door letting out a deep sight "I am going to sit on your bed and wait for you to get out okay?" Knowing he wouldn't get an answer he turned his back to the door and was ready to walk away from the door when he heard it. The faint sound of someone sobbing, with a sharp move he turned around and placed his ear on the door "Damian are you okay? Are you hurt? Why are you crying?" Asked a worried Dick while knocking on the door urgently. No response ever came, only the sound of faint sobs on the other side of the door could be heard.
"Damian, answer me!... Okay that's it, I am coming in" Dick opened the door and followed the clear sound of crying. His heart broke when he saw his little brother in the tub curled up and crying. He kneelled down turning off the running water that was close to overflowing and put his hand on top of Damian's head.
Damian turned to looked at him with his little puffed red eyes before returning to his previous position.
"Oh Damian, it's okay I'm here now" Dick reassured his little brother
"They hate me..." Whispered Damian.
"Shhh...you don't need to talk right now... Let's get you cleaned up first and then we can lay down on your bed and talk, sounds good?"
Damian raised his head and gave a nod, before Dick took his hair shampoo and begun to wash his hair
10 minutes later
Dick was sitting on Damian's bed waiting for him to put his PJ's on and come out of the bathroom. After a few minutes Damian came out, walking slowly towards his bed. He stoped in front of his brother, taking a sudden interest in his bedroom carpet.
"Grayson" Damian said with his head down. Dick looked at him with a sad smile on his face and stroked his wet hair
"I thought we passed the whole last name think after out last talk" said jokingly Dick before picking him up and placing him on the bed besides him, gaining a gasp of surprise from Damian in the process.
Dick started to tickle the unexpected Damian, hoping it can help him to forget his worries. Which seem to work because Damian started to laugh. This made Dick's day cause Damian doesn't laugh as much as he needs too.
"Damian?" Called a voice from outside the door followed by 2 loud knocks.
"Can we come in?" Called another voice
Dick looked at Damian waiting to see what he wanted to do but he just looked down on his hands.
"Please?" Called another voice when they didn't get a response.
Damian moved behind his brother, looked up and gave a nod before looking down again.
"Come in" called Dick letting them know they could enter the room.
Slowly the door cricked opened, revealing Bruce, Jason and Tim. They walked towards the bed where the two boys were sitting and their hearts broke upon seeing Damian's puffy red eyes. They felt guilty and ashamed, especially Bruce, that they made Damian cry.
"Damian, I am sorry"
"For what are you sorry Father?" Damian looked up to his father, unsure as to why his Father apologized to him, something that wasn't very common around here. His father was strong-headed he rarely apologize, even more to him.
"For many things but mostly for my behaviour towards you" explained Bruce seeing the confusion on his son's eyes.
Bruce kneelled in front of Damian and put his hands on his knees, grimacing when Damian flinches under his touch. He son looked beyond confused and, honestly, he can't blame him.
"After you left the cave, Dick showed us the security tape with you in an-"
"What security tape?" Damian cut him off looking at Dick
"The one from a week ago" informed him Dick half-heartedly.
"You saw them that?" Damian look at Dick with a betrayed look. His brother betrayed him by showing them a private "conversation" between the two of them
"Damian..." Started Dick but Damian turn his back on him, which hurt Dick
"Listen Damian, it doesn't matter what Dick showed us, we just wanted to apologize for everything wrong we done and said to you"
"Yeah, what Tim said." Said Jason swinging back and forth with his feet
Damian looked at the three of them like they had grown a second head, debating if this was one big sick prank or not. Which after two minutes of deep thinking leaned against it, since his father was here too and he knew his father wouldn't participate in a such awful and cruel prank or so he hoped too.
"You think a few sorries will make everything better?" Asked hurt Damian "because let me tell you one thing, it will not."
"We know Damian, we really do, we will try to do whatever we can to make it up to you"
"Really Father you do?" Asked Damian with a sarcastic tone in his voice. " Because it seems like you do not. You father, ignore me pretty much all the time unless I have done something wrong, the only reason I am here is because you took pity on me. Todd and Drake basically hate my guts and they barely even making any effort to hide it, they keep calling me demon spawn or brat and other things like that, like it is nothing." Damian was shaking, his voice was filled with anger and sadness, stretching here and there as he was trying to keep himself for crying. Jason and Tim look down ashamed of their previous behaviour.
"You act like you know what they did to me, how they treated me, training me! You know nothing! Do you honestly think that I enjoy killing, they forced me to kill. It was either kill or be killed. They tortured me whenever I disobeyed them, which to them was just a simple punishment." Damian by now was crying, he couldn't keep the tears back anymore.
"They forced me to kill everyone who I was getting attached to. I was forced to kill my first nanny, who was more like a mother to me than Talia ever was, when I was only four." Damian was breaking down Dick tried to comfort but he pushed him away.
"You can't just expect me to forget the torturous training that I had to endure for 9 years and turned into a normal 10 year old kid. Do you know how it is to live with the conston fear of my so called Grandfather and Mother coming to take me back and punish me for everything wrong thing they think I did while I was living here?"
"Damian you don't have to worry about them they are dead" said calmly Tim as he came closer to Damian
"He is the Demon and she is the daughter of a demon, if anyone can find their way out hell it would be them"
"You don't have to worry, we will protect you and even if they manage to come back we will never let them take you away from here" reassured him his father placing one of his big hand on his youngest son cheek and gave him a gentle smile.
"Damian you are right, we shouldn't have expect you to act like a regular 10 year old or forget at command all that you had to endure. Me more than the others, since I stayed there myself for a while after I was brought back to life. I should have been more considered of your past since I knew how they trained there." Admitted Jason getting closer to the others
"Look Damian, I know we treated you poorly but please let us make it right" pleaded Tim
Damian looked at him searching for any indication that he was lying but found none.
"Okay" he whispered making the rest of them smile
"Thank you Damian, now how about we go to the cinema room and watch a movie and eat some of Alfred's famous cookies huh? I think we had enough emotional turmoil for the Day, don't you agree Damian?" Bruce smiled at his son stroking his hair
"Okay, then let's go" Said Bruce taking Damian in his arms gaining a gasp of surprise from the kid in his arms with the other three following behind smiling at the sight.
My dear readers I hope you liked this second part of fearing to love. If you want you are welcome to leave a request for a shot you would like me to write, I already received a kind of request to do a deaged Damian one in my Ao3 account where I have posted the same story. Anyhow as I you know English is not my first language so I apologize for any vocabulary or grammatical mistake I made and missed when I read it again for any mistake. Kisses my readers untill the next shot.