531Thanks for all the reviews last time! Glad to see everyone's so surprised by the twist at the end. I've been waiting 51 chapters for that twist, and the reactions are wonderful. Some of you are definitely piecing together the other related puzzles, reading everyone's speculations is so energizing and motivating. That said:
Echoes of Light will be going on hiatus until August.
My family is going on vacation next week, and I won't have time to edit/post while we're gone. Beyond that, the next few chapters are going to be VERY important so I need time to write them carefully. We're heading to the end of Part 1.
Chapter 60
Once upon a time, there was a shy little girl with a gentle soul and all the pressure in the world weighing on her shoulders.
"Akari-chan, I-I'm sorry..." Hinata's shoulders shook as tears pricked her eyes, her hands wringing the hem of her shirt. "F-father, the elders—th-they, they said—"
"Forget what they said, Hinata!" Akari cut in, and Hinata physically recoiled in shock, taking a step back as if she'd been slapped.
"A-Akari-ch-chan?" she stuttered.
"What good have your clan elders ever done for you?" Akari snapped. "They're just putting all this pressure on you and not letting you decide anything for yourself!"
"B-but, th-that's... Th-they're adults, a-and... a-and..."
"Because they're adults, they know better than you?" Akari sniped bitterly. "Is that it? That's just garbage and you know it! I mean, do you really think it's bad being friends with me!?" Her vision blurred as she shouted, Hinata's stunned face growing foggy and indistinct through the haze of tears clouding her eyes.
"A-Akari-chan, th-that's not—"
"I need to go," Akari cut in, her voice thick and wet. "I'm sorry. Goodbye, Hinata."
With that, she turned and ran, leaving Hinata alone in the middle of the forest.
Hinata's earliest clear memory was waking up in her father's arms as he stood over the corpse of a man dressed in black.
At the time she didn't understand the significance of the moment. She had only just turned three that day, and her still-developing brain couldn't process the full implications of the scene. Truth be told, she could barely remember anything else from that year, let alone the days that followed. She couldn't remember the sadness after her uncle died, she couldn't remember the tension at the threat of a looming war—she didn't even realize she had nearly been kidnapped by the man in black until someone explained it to her years later.
The only reason that moment remained so clear was because it had been the first time Hinata had ever seen death up close, and she knew instinctively that her father had been responsible.
That day would set the tone for the rest of her life. Something changed in the Hyuuga household that day, everyone became sterner and stricter. Though she could not remember the times before then, she still felt a strange sense of loss. Neji-nii—who she vaguely recalled thinking to be kind and fun to play with—became cold and distant with her, and she distinctly remembered wondering why her training had increased so much even if she couldn't remember how it was before.
In a way, she supposed their reaction was natural. She had nearly been kidnapped, and as the eldest child of the Main House she would always be a valuable target. They wanted her to be strong in order to defend herself, even if she would likely never directly enter the front lines as a kunoichi.
Hinata understood. Really, she did.
But that didn't make the pressure any easier.
Every time she trained with her father she could feel dozens of eyes watching her, looking for the tiniest imperfection. The close attention made her nervous and clumsy, increasing her likelihood of making mistakes. And when she did inevitably make one, whether due to her nerves or simply inexperience, she could feel everyone's disapproval intensify, only making her chest feel tighter.
Her naturally shy demeanor didn't help either. When other people visited the compound she would be too shy to speak to them, resulting in harsh scolding for her "rude behavior" once they left. Meanwhile, the Hyuuga clan's distinctive white eyes made her an easy target for bullying, civilian children often mocking her or calling her creepy when she tried to play with them the few times she left the compound. One of the few positive encounters she'd had with outsiders had been a boy with hair as bright as the sun defending her from bullies, but even then she couldn't bring herself to approach him again.
By the time she started at the academy her confidence had already hit a deep low, leaving her too anxious to approach any other students, not even the boy who had once defended her. All she could do was watch from afar as her classmates mingled and developed their own friendships and inner circles, always feeling like an outsider.
Back then, Hinata had already consigned herself to a lifetime of loneliness. She understood she'd always be on the outside, or at least she felt that way. In the end though, fate had other plans for her.
"Come on, Hinata! Just a little farther!"
Akari waved at her eagerly as she ran ahead, the smaller Hyuuga heiress panting with exhaustion as she followed the other girl down the busy streets. Her stomach churned with anxiety as people glanced at them, trying not to pay them too much mind and just silently thankful none of the peering eyes were stark, featureless white.
Uchiha Akari was Hinata's polar opposite in every way possible. Brash and confident, naturally talented and smart—Akari really was everything Hinata was not. Even now, the brown-haired girl showed none of Hinata's exhaustion as she skipped up the steps to Konoha's public library— literally hopping up them one at a time—before turning to wave at her. "Hurry, before all the good books get taken!" she yelled. "I don't want to get a bad grade!"
Hinata winced and nodded, forcing herself to move a bit faster lest she upset her classmate. The only reason they were talking at all was because the teacher had assigned them as partners on a history assignment. Her stomach had sank when their names been called. The Uchiha girl seemed to dislike most of their female classmates—a sentiment which seemed perfectly mutual—and given her own shy, timid disposition, Hinata felt sure Akari would dislike her too.
'Just for this assignment,' she told herself as she followed the other girl into the library. She just had to put up with this for a little while.
But two days after the assignment ended, they spoke again.
"Are... Are those cinnamon rolls?"
Akari stared at Hinata's lunch with large eyes, her head slowly tilting as she stared at the sweets. Blinking, Hinata looked between the fluffy dessert and Akari's intense stare before nodding meekly, scooting a couple inches away.
"Ah, y-yes," she murmured, looking away embarrassedly. "I-I know they're b-bad for you, b-but my mother packed them because I, um, g-got a good grade on the test..." She could feel her cheeks redden as Akari scooted closer, the shy girl lowering her head a bit more to avoid seeing the judging look on the other girl's face.
Cinnamon rolls weren't nutritious or even very filling, in fact they were pretty much the opposite, but Hinata loved them all the same. Her mother had been wise to bribe her with them in exchange for studying hard, but now that she was actually looking at them in her lunchbox, Hinata felt embarrassed. The other girls would make fun of her for sure if they saw it, and she doubted the teacher would approve either.
"Are... are those homemade?" the other girl whispered, and Hinata winced before giving a tiny, almost imperceptible nod, ready to curl in on herself. Why did Akari have to approach her today of all days? She felt so childish and embarrassed, and—
Her thoughts stopped as Akari suddenly grabbed her shoulders, causing her head to snap up reflexively to find Akari staring her straight in the eye. Her breath caught at the serious look on the other girl's face, her black eyes seeming to bore into her with an intensity that rivaled the Byakugan. "Hinata."
"Y-yes?" she breathed, ready to wince.
"If you split that with me, I will do anything you ask," Akari informed her, perfectly serious, and it took approximately five seconds for her words to register.
"I... Um, w-what?"
"Share them with me, please!" Akari burst, releasing her grip and throwing her hands up. "My mom makes us the most boring and 'nutritious' bento every day! Today she put in sashimi! Sashimi, Hinata! I hate sashimi! I want something sweet for once! Just name your price, I'll do anything! I know! I'll take over your cleaning duties for a week!"
"Um..." Hinata just stared at her, and Akari jumped to her feet.
"That's not enough? Okay, then—then I'll lend you my favorite book! It's got all these fairy tales from a place called Uzushio and it's super-cool, I promise!"
"A-ano..."
"No, you're right, you can't know if you'll like it if you've never seen it. Okay, instead, I'll do your homework—wait, that would be cheating... Okay, I'll help you with your homework! Anything you're struggling with! And—cinnamon!"
Akari cut off mid-ramble with a loud cheer when Hinata thrust her lunch at her in a desperate effort to end the mind-blowing jumble of words tumbling out of her mouth. In the end, the only reason Hinata got to eat any of her reward was because Akari made sure to cut the roll in half so she could have some too.
Hinata was still surprised when Akari sat next to her the next day with a textbook asking her what homework she needed help with. That conversation ended up being even more confusing and overwhelming than the previous day for both of them.
It happened the day after the invasion.
She hadn't spent that night at home. Kiba had taken her back to the Inuzuka compound, reasoning that if she went home she'd just run into "that Neji bastard" and then she'd just be even worse off than before. His mother had sent word to the Hyuuga clan about her stay and they'd received no objections, so it had only been early in the morning that she finally returned to her family's compound, the guards offering no words as she slipped through the gates.
Hinata had been reluctant to go home, knowing her cowardly actions the previous day would elicit strict discipline and scolding. Avoiding it would have only made it worse though, so with a heavy heart she headed for her father's study to receive the well-deserved scolding. She had been bracing herself to knock on the door when she heard Elder Fumito speak inside.
"Your daughter is a disgrace to our family name. Not only did she flee before her match, but she did so in front of dignitaries from nearly every country."
His words had caused her breath to catch in her throat, freezing in place as she stared at the door. Beyond the painfully thin rice paper walls she could hear the ensuing conversation all too clearly, her father's voice joining with those of all the clan elders.
"If she hadn't fled, she would have been caught up in brunt of the invasion." Her father spoke second, his voice smooth and stoic as ever as he countered Fumito's point.
Next came Elder Nobuko. "The Hyuuga clan is fortunate that the invasion occurred in time to mask her cowardice from the public! It does not matter if her status as heiress has been revoked. She is still a member of the Main House, and her actions reflect upon all of us. If it were to become public knowledge that she was intimidated by a genin from the Branch house—"
Her father interrupted her. "Neji may be a member of the Branch House, but he's also one of the most talented geniuses to come from our clan in several generations. I doubt even I would have been able to match his skill at that age. Expecting Hinata to do so is wholly unfair and unreasonable."
Elder Fumito spoke again, cold and apathetic. "The difference in their skills doesn't matter. What matters is that she fled after he fought. That alone would have brought unspeakable shame and doubt to the Main House's reputation."
Then a fourth voice joined the fray, one which sent an unbearable chill down her spine. Elder Kyotoki was the oldest of the elders, one of the few who still remembered the Warring States Era. If he said something, the others treated it as law, and his words proved just as ominous as she feared. "We have allowed her slacking to go unpunished long enough. It is time for us to take action and do what we should have long ago."
Those had been the last words Hinata had heard before she'd turned and fled, words which would follow her into her dreams.
Somehow her steps made no sound as she darted down the hall for her room, no one stepping into her path to notice the look of panic on her face. Once inside she slid the door shut and crumpled to the floor, clutching at her chest as her breaths came out in ragged gasps. The dark tones of Elder Kyotoki had been the final nail for Hinata's frayed nerves.
Though she hadn't heard the rest, she knew what he intended: to have her sealed, sent to the Branch House for the rest of her life. Just thinking about it made her stomach twist, made it impossible for her to breathe. All she could imagine was Neji's hateful gaze, looking on her with nothing but scorn. Blinking away tears, she looked up at her room, trying to control her breathing to anchor and calm herself. As her panic slowly faded, one thought dominated her mind: she couldn't stay here.
Mind settled, Hinata rose and began packing almost mechanically, grabbing the barest necessities and shoving them into a bag. Passing her nightstand, she paused as a photo caught her eye, and after a moment's hesitation she grabbed the frame and slipped it into the bag before leaving.
An hour later she stood in Shino's house, too intimidated to return to the rowdy Inuzuka compound. His father took in the bag and her stricken expression, and then sent his adopted son to prepare the guest room.
"You like him, don't you?"
Hinata started when Akari's voice sounded behind her, jumping with a startled squeak and slapping her hands over her mouth as she spun around. Her face turned bright red as she saw the other girl looking at her with a smug smirk, no doubt feeling quite superior after catching the shy girl hiding behind a tree to watch Naruto train in the academy's training fields. Even now she could hear the blond yell in frustration as his kunai missed the target again, but his voice fell to the back of her mind, the girl in front of her taking precedence.
She swallowed harshly, lowering her hands and averting her gaze. "I-I," she stuttered, her mouth dry. "I-it's n-n-not... Not, u-um..." She winced when she heard Akari snort, her face turning even more red.
"You don't need to make excuses," she said. "You spy on him almost every day, it's super-obvious someone has a crush." Akari's voice took on a teasing lilt, making Hinata squeak again and duck her head lower.
"I-I'm sorry!" she blurted, dropping her torso into a bow. She missed seeing Akari abruptly jolt in alarm, confusion marring her features.
"Wha—h-hey, don't apologize! What are you even apologizing for!?"
"B-because I do like him!" Hinata cried, dipping over even further. "A-and you don't like girls who like boys! I'm s-sorry!"
"I—what? No, that's not it at all!" Akari's voice rose in panic as Hinata started trembling, waving her hands frantically. "I don't like girls who let crushes get in the way of their training! But you're different!" Hinata sniffled, standing up straight to shoot the other girl a confused look.
"I... I am?" she asked hesitantly, still feeling a bit teary-eyed. Akari quickly bobbed her head, her panicked expression becoming serious.
"Yeah! You're not fawning over him constantly like the other girls fawn over Sasuke. You're trying to be more like him, right?" The accuracy in the girl's words caught Hinata off-guard, her eyes widening in surprise. Seeming satisfied by her reaction, Akari nodded to herself and continued, "That's totally different. That's how crushes should work, they should make you want to get better, not prettier. That boy's way luckier than he knows. You're going to be a great kunoichi someday, everyone'll be fighting over you."
As Akari spoke Hinata could feel her nerves settle, quietly rubbing her eyes. She had been apprehensive about how Akari would react to her crush on Naruto—even her family seemed to dislike it—so to hear her approve of it... Hinata hadn't expected that. "Th-thank you," she said, offering a weak smile. The other girl responded with a bright grin of her own, embodying the light which served as her namesake.
For the next six weeks Hinata threw herself into assisting with reconstruction around the village alongside her team, avoiding her family the whole time. Her teammates became bodyguards for her by unspoken consent, Kiba and Akamaru working out some sort of signal whenever they so much as scented a Hyuuga and leading her away. If they couldn't leave the area Shino would station himself in front of her as a sort of shield, making sure no one would approach.
When they didn't have work, she hid herself in the Aburame compound. The Aburame never once showed annoyance at her extended stay, never questioned her about when she would return home or made her feel unwelcome. Shino's father rarely spoke but he radiated a calm sort of aura that never made her feel unwelcome. Torune tended to be more vocal, often the one to fetch her in the mornings for breakfast and politely inquiring about her day with what appeared to be genuine interest.
Slowly, she felt her frayed nerves mend themselves and her fear lessen. Each day Hinata felt herself grow stronger, braver and more confident than the day before. She still lived in fear of encountering one of her relatives, but the fear no longer completely consumed her and left her paralyzed. She began leaving on her own more often, only for short periods of time and never straying too far. One day, when her hosts ran out of a certain cleaning product needed for their hives, she volunteered to fetch it to show her gratitude for their kindness in allowing her to stay.
That had been when her luck finally reached an end, and Elder Fumito cornered her on a lonely street.
"Your behavior has been absolutely disgraceful," he'd told her coldly. "Just yesterday the Yamanaka heiress came asking for you! Do you realize how utterly shameful it is to admit that our supposed heiress has not set foot in the compound in more than three weeks despite being in the village the entire time?"
"I-I-I... I-I-I..." Her voice had wavered, her nervous stutter returning with a vengeance under his harsh, judging glare. A single sob slipped out, and she sucked in a squeaky breath as she continued, "I-I'm s-s-sorry. P-p-please, I-I'm n-not t-trying to—t-to—"
"Enough," the old man cut in icily. "Your stutter is just further evidence of my point. You are a disgrace to the Main House. It has been over a month, we have let your little 'episode' last long enough. It is time for you to return home so we can deal with your behavior—properly."
At that point he'd silenced himself as Masaru strode into sight, his appearance making her jump in surprise and horror at being witnessed. The boy paid her no mind, his gaze focused purely on Fumito as he walked past them silently. Watching him depart made something sink inside her stomach, his cool glare reminding her of someone else she once knew.
Fumito huffed quietly, drawing her attention back to him. "I expect you to be back at the compound tomorrow night by sundown," he told her coldly. "If you arrive even a second past that, I guarantee you will suffer much worse than merely being sealed."
And at that moment, as she watched him turn and stalk away, Hinata felt her whole world begin to crack.
"Here, my mom showed me how to make it."
Six-year-old Hinata's cheeks flushed as she stared at the long braided strand, her eyes wide with surprise. Raising her head, she found Akari looking at her with a smile, the other girl's face radiating a quiet confidence that the young Hyuuga heiress desired oh so much. "I-I," she stuttered, but the other girl shook her head, grabbing one of her wrists when Hinata nervously poked her fingers together and lifting her hand in the air.
"Don't you dare try to refuse, Nata," Akari scolded, using the strange nickname she'd come up with. Slipping the bracelet around Hinata's slender wrist, she wrapped it around three times before tying the ends together, nodding with a pleased smile. "See? It looks good! And it's long so you can keep wearing it even when you get bigger!"
Still surprised, Hinata's face grew even redder and she swiftly retracted her wrist, cradling it against her chest. The bracelet felt soft, the weight light and feeling almost natural, as if it belonged there. "I... I didn't get you anything though."
"You don't have to," Akari huffed, pouting at her childishly. "Silly Nata-chan, don't you get it? This is the last chance to get you a birthday gift!"
"O-oh, I... I see." Hinata nodded slowly, staring at the bracelet in shock. Today marked the last day of classes before winter break, and classes wouldn't resume until after her birthday passed. The fact Akari remembered her birthday at all stunned her, she had only mentioned it once. Then again, the fact that Akari spoke to her at all still surprised her.
That one fateful assignment had somehow led to something more. At some point she started arriving at the academy almost every day to find Akari waiting for her at their shared table, a bright smile on her face. They shared their lunches together more often than not, trading disliked foods with each other, and spent their free time helping each other with homework when they struggled.
Not once did she look down on Hinata or scold her for being weak. She sometimes nagged Hinata about how timid she acted, but it had a more playful and friendly ring to it than genuinely annoyed like the adults. And now, to give her a bracelet... After resigning herself to an academy career full of loneliness, this was more than Hinata had ever dared to hope for.
"I... Th-thank you," she murmured, dropping her torso in a polite bow.
"If you want to thank me, then you can make me one too!" Akari chirped cheerfully, and Hinata snapped her head up with a startled squeak.
"Wh-what? B-but, I don't know how—"
"I'll teach you," Akari interrupted, smiling at her. "This will be a symbol of our friendship, okay?" Hinata's eyes widened, stunned, but she swallowed down the reflexive urge to repeat 'Friendship?' and instead nodded.
"O-okay," she replied, her lips curling into a small, hesitant smile of her own. "That... That sounds like fun. Right?"
"Right!" Akari clapped, a giant grin on her face. "This will be the sign of our promise! We'll become the best kunoichi in the world, and stay together every step of the way!"
Akari beamed at her and the hesitancy left Hinata, her smile growing more genuine as her chest grew warm. After all, when she thought about it, they spoke to each other every day at the academy. They helped each other with classwork, they told jokes, they encouraged each other...
They were friends, right?
"Hinata, it has come to our attention you have formed a friendship with an Uchiha girl, Uchiha Akari. Is that correct?"
The seven-year-old heiress sat in perfect seiza, her head bowed and her heart racing. The elders of the Main Household sat before her with straight and perfect postures, all of them feeling so giant and imposing to the tiny girl. "Yes, sir," she murmured, not daring to look at them. She could feel their gazes grow sharper, their scrutiny intensifying tenfold.
"That is unacceptable," Elder Nobuko declared, making Hinata wince. "You, as the eldest daughter of the Main House, represent the Hyuuga as a whole. You cannot associate with someone so deplorable." Her cold words made Hinata freeze, so stunned her head immediately raised to stare at the old crone.
"What? But Akari-chan's not bad! She's nice and encouraging and never acts mean!" 'She's my best friend,' she wanted to say, but the words died in her throat as she saw the apathetic looks on the elders' faces.
"The Hyuuga and Uchiha clans have a long standing rivalry dating to before the village's founding," Elder Kyotoki declared. "What's more, Uchiha Akari is the daughter of Uchiha Ryoko, whose retirement and career has caused great shame. Having our heiress consorting with her daughter will only cause harm to our clan's reputation. Do you wish to dishonor us?"
Hinata faltered, too stunned to speak. Why? Why would talking to Akari be so bad? Why did her mother have anything to do with Akari? She couldn't find words, just stared at them wide-eyed. Next to her she heard her father clear his throat, answering in her stead.
"I shall personally see to the end of their relationship," Hiashi promised, and at that point Hinata knew that her friendship was over.
"I expect you to be back at the compound tomorrow night by sundown."
Hinata felt numb.
After a night of restless attempts to sleep Hinata woke up a final time just before dawn with a large knot already present in her stomach. She went through her morning routine mechanically, stepping into the bathroom to wash herself before dressing for the day. She stared at her reflection in the bedroom mirror in silence, blankly registering the dark bruising under her eyes from a bad night's sleep.
Elder Fumito's harsh words from the previous day rang through her head on loop, a constant refrain of coldness and apathy. Each time his lecture repeated she felt her heart twinge, her teeth digging into her lip a bit deeper and her stomach coiling just a bit tighter. Yet more than that, she felt hollow and empty, her emotions almost exhausted.
"If you arrive even a second past that, I guarantee you will suffer much worse than merely being sealed."
Those were the words that made her finally break, her face crumbling as she clutched her stomach with a noiseless sob. Tears slid down her cheeks as she fell to the floor and silently cried, fear consuming her and leaving her almost paralyzed.
I can't... I can't go back! I can't be sealed!
Neji's hateful eyes flashed in her mind, years of harsh whispers and cold stares at the hands of her family washing over her. When she received the Caged Bird Seal, it would validate every one of those horrid whispers about her being unsuited. It would confirm, once and for all, that she was a failure, a disgrace to the Hyuuga clan in every shape and form possible.
And she couldn't do that.
She couldn't handle the thought of returning to the compound with all those featureless white eyes watching her, fully aware what hid beneath her bangs and bandages. She couldn't handle those scornful whispers she would inevitably hear, the disdain she'd experienced her whole life amplified as their beliefs appeared to be validated.
Her fingers instinctively scrabbled for her wrist only to brush against bare skin, the sensation making her freeze and snap back to alertness. The bracelet... Where was it? Panic rose in her as she swiveled her head around in search for it before finally spying the braided bracelet on the nightstand. Relief swelled as she practically dove for it, snatching it up with an eager fervor. She squeezed it fondly but paused, her eyes lingering on the framed photograph sitting next to it.
It was a simple picture, just her and Akari sitting in a photo booth with Akari making a face at the camera while Hinata giggled. It had been taken just a week before the elders forced her to end their friendship, on a day when the academy unexpectedly released early. It was the only photo Hinata had of herself together with her friend, and whenever she looked at it she felt an overwhelming surge of fondness and grief.
Hinata felt something thick and heavy catch in her throat, gulping harshly as she turned to face it fully.
Once, when they'd been young, Akari had promised her she'd be with her every step of the way, watching Hinata grow and develop into the great and powerful kunoichi she was destined to be.
"I'm not great," she whispered to the photo, her fingers clenching around the bracelet. "I'm not powerful, I'm weak and stupid and useless. I couldn't even stand up to the elders to defend you. Y-you were right, to be m-mad at me back then, a-and I... I-I..." Tears started to well in her eyes and she quickly wiped them away, pushing down the urge to cry as she shook her head.
Sucking in a deep breath, she looked at the photo and willed her determination to return, her eyes burning with resolve. "I'm not strong, but... I want to get better," she said quietly. "I-I know what I have to do, a-and it scares me, b-but... But I'll try to do my best, so please just wait a little longer!" She bowed to the photo, and then tied the bracelet around her wrist before turning to pack her meager belongings.
The last thing she grabbed was a small pouch made of lavender fabric and attached to a string, the kanji for "courage" embroidered onto a white tag. Hinata draped the string around her neck and stuffed the pouch into her shirt, turning to leave the room as empty as the day she first arrived.
One day, her father called her into his study.
She sat in perfect seiza like she'd been taught, mindful of her posture. He just looked at her with heavy eyes, his face grimmer than she'd ever seen before, and she couldn't help the curl of anxiety that formed in her stomach. Had she done something wrong? Had her grades fallen? Or was there an issue with her form during training?
A million possibilities ran through her mind, each worse than the last, but she never could have expected the words her father actually said.
"Hinata, last night the Uchiha clan suffered a near-total massacre." Pausing, he looked at her for a long moment before sighing and continuing quietly, "Uchiha Akari was among the casualties. I'm sorry."
Hinata stared at her father blankly, his words sinking in slowly. A massacre. The Uchiha clan. Akari was dead. Akari was dead. Akari was dead.
Hinata opened her mouth, and she screamed.
"I'm sorry, Naruto. I love you. Goodbye."
The words tasted like ash on her tongue as she spoke, her palm striking Naruto in the chest as her mouth forced itself into a tiny smile. Her chest ached as she watched the boy she loved more than anything else fall backwards, the sparks of consciousness faded from his bright blue eyes by her own doing. She couldn't watch him hit the ground, she spun and ran away even as he fell, tears pricking her eyes as she tried to hold back her desperate sobs.
As she raced through the empty streets of Konoha the world seemed to blur, her heart at war with itself over the knowledge of what she was planning to do—what she already had done. The moment she knocked out Naruto, there had been no going back anymore. The storage scroll in the pouch on her hip felt heavy, the pouch tucked into her shirt bouncing against her chest with each step.
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, please forgive me!
She held so much remorse and regret, yet she knew nothing could make her stop now. Just imagining the tall gates leading to the Hyuuga compound, Hinata could feel the pressure crushing her bit by bit, her body ready to shatter into a million jagged pieces that would then implode and curl together into a jagged mess of sharp pointed ends while she screamed in agony and despair.
That pressure had been weighing upon her for so long, longer than the invasion, longer than the Chuunin Exams, longer than she could even remember. Hinata wasn't strong like Akari or Naruto, she had never been brave despite the kanji on the pouch Ryoko made for her. Hinata was weak, pure and simple, a timid soul thrust into a situation that would be harsh even on the strongest souls, and she just couldn't stand it anymore.
All she could do now was try to make things right.
"Hinata?"
A familiar voice made her freeze and she slid to a halt, her throat constricting tightly with dread as she spun around. She swallowed harshly, her fingers once more unconsciously reaching for the bracelet. It had started to fray from how much she'd been fiddling with it, thin pieces of thread starting to unravel from the strands beneath her fingers.
"M-Masaru," she whispered, her face pale as she stared at the twin of the girl she had once called her best friend. His black eyes remained unreadable in the dim evening light, his whole form shrouded in the shadows and darkness of night.
"Where are you going?" he asked, and she swallowed, taking a step back.
"I-I... U-um..." Masaru inclined his head as he regarded her, his face still impossible to read. His head half-turned to look over his shoulder briefly.
"Naruto's unconscious on the ground over there," he commented almost casually, and her blood turned to ice. He knows. She could sense it in her gut, with more certainty than anything she'd ever felt before. She didn't know how she knew, or even what exactly he knew, but she could just tell he knew she'd been the one to knock him out.
Hinata swallowed harsher than before, trembling lightly as she stared at him. "I need to go," she forced out, her hands balling into fists at her side. "I-I need... I c-can't..." Masaru turned back to her, blinking slowly before nodding.
"I know," he said simply. "I figured that would happen, after what she said to you." Hinata stiffened once more, her eyes widening.
"What... she said to me?" she repeated slowly, and he shrugged.
"How did she put it...? 'What good have your clan elders ever done for you?' 'They're just putting all this pressure on you and not letting you decide anything for yourself?'"
Hinata froze at his words, her face draining of all color as numbness washed over her. "How...?" She trailed off, her voice barely more than a whisper, and Masaru paused before smiling cryptically.
"Don't worry about Naruto," he said, ignoring her unspoken question. "I'll still be here to take care of him. Just take this for me." As he spoke he pulled out an envelope and tossed it to her, Hinata fumbling to catch it. Even as she turned it over in her hands he dipped his head at her and raised a hand in farewell, adding, "Goodbye, Hinata. Tell them I'll see them around."
With that he turned and walked away, leaving a dumbstruck Hinata holding the envelope. After a long moment that felt like an eternity, she finally turned and broke into a run, fleeing before anyone could see her. Veins bulged around her eyes as she wove through the empty streets, darting for the forest with a desperate fervor. She burst into the clearing and staggered to a halt, nearly doubling over as she gasped for breath.
Pulling the pouch out from inside her shirt, she quickly loosened the drawstring and dumped a small slip of paper into her palm with a seal drawn on it. Her fist crumpled around it as she pumped chakra into it, her shoulders shaking the entire time.
Almost immediately she felt a displacement of air behind her, sending a chill down her back, and she turned to find a man in a red mask.
"You ready to go?" he asked, tilting his head, and she exhaled a shaky breath as she nodded.
"Y-yes," she whispered. He extended a gloved hand and she took it with only a moment of hesitation, and then the world swirled around them.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"
Hinata sobbed in the bathroom stall as she buried her face in her arms, tears threatening to flow at any moment. In the end, the pressure had been too much. After making it to the finals by a fluke, she'd been unable to bring herself to fight Naruto. Her opponent's sickening scream from the preliminaries looped in her head, that sickening crack of bone shattering filling her with nausea. Worst than that, though, she could imagine her clan's reactions, their disdain finally validated by this act of cowardice on such a public stage.
Years of pressure had finally broken her down, leaving Hinata barely more than an empty shell.
"Hey, are you okay?"
Hinata squealed in surprise and jumped almost a foot in the air, spinning to stare at the stall door in shock. A brown-haired girl peered through the open crack with a worried expression, her dark eyes glittering with worry. "Sorry, but, I thought I heard crying and you look kinda upset?"
Too stunned to reply, Hinata stumbled back and folded her hands over her mouth, her eyes wide with horror. "I'm f-fine," she forced out, and a long moment of silence passed between them.
"You don't sound fine?" It sounded like a question, and Hinata winced before averting her gaze. All she could think about was how disgusted her family would be that she'd lost her composure in front of a stranger, the final cherry on top to her shameful behavior that day.
She barely had time to imagine their reactions when another head appeared in the doorway, this one much more familiar. "Onee-san?" Hanabi questioned, and she stepped back with a startled squeak, her face draining of color.
"H-Hanabi? W-what—"
"I was going to the concession stand and saw you run in here. Why are you so upset?" Hinata couldn't respond, only able to stare at her sister in muted horror.
"Ah, I should, uh, probably go," the other girl murmured awkwardly, and quickly retreated from the scene. Hinata barely noticed, too focused on Hanabi's presence and the fact she'd shown her weakness in front of her.
"I-I'm sorry," she whispered, averting her gaze even as her younger sister regarded her with a worried frown.
"Onee-san, why are you so upset? Did something happen?"
"I-I... Th-that is..." She trailed off, unable to finish the sentence. Her gaze flickered to the braided bracelet on her wrist, instinctively drawn to the fond memories it held, Akari's dark eyes and warm smile which glittered with so much light—
And at that moment Hinata froze, her head snapping up with wide eyes. Without a word she burst out of the stall and darted past a startled Hanabi, flying down the halls with her Byakugan active. Her heart fluttered erratically as she burst out of the arena, her eyes tracing the path of a distant figure only she bothered to see.
Chaos erupted around her as she ran, the streets devolving into violent battles as unfamiliar men in masks began descending and wreaking havoc. She nearly screamed as a kunai whizzed past her head, swerving to dodge it, but she never slowed down or changed course. All she could focus on was following the distant figure running ahead of her, ducking through small alleys and side streets to avoid the chaos around them.
Their path took them away from the town, away from the battles and death and bloodshed. The buildings gave way to dense forest, the sounds of metal clashing fading into the distant background. Hinata's feet carried her even faster, her heartbeat growing more and more rapid as she drew closer to her quarry. Finally, she could see her target through the trees even without her Byakugan active and she staggered to a halt, her heart catching in her throat.
There in the clearing stood the girl from the bathroom, turning to look at her with wide black eyes. Hinata's mouth opened, one word breathlessly slipping out:
"Akari-chan?"
Hinata gasped as the world stopped spinning, staggering slightly as she tried to reorient herself. "Sorry, forgot to warn you," she heard the man say distantly, but she barely noticed. Instead her attention was drawn to the heavy weight that suddenly barreled into her, making her fall down with a startled yelp.
"You're here! You're actually here!"
"Geez, are you always this physical?" someone grouched above them, only to get shushed by the man. The person on top of Hinata just laughed, musical and sweet as she pulled away with a grin.
"Nata-chan, I missed you so much!"
Despite the furious red tint dusting her cheeks Hinata couldn't help but smile, returning that beaming grin which embodied light.
"I missed you too, Akari-chan."
Once upon a time, the shy little girl with a gentle soul and all the pressure in the world weighing on her shoulders lost her first friend and saw her world fall apart. Then one day she found the friend again, and for the first time she felt all was right with the world.