Lifty & Shifty
Pop & Cub
With Special Guest Star:
It was a beautiful day in the little woodland town that the Happy Tree Friends called home. the sun was shining at peak capacity, birds were happily chirping as they flew by, and the grass was at it's very greenest. When had things ever gone wrong on a day like this?
On this day, a nervous looking red porcupine with a dandruff problem, named Flaky, whom for the longest time, people thought was a boy, parked her car in front of the local super market. Once she turned it off, she opened the door and got out, nervously looking around. In order to relax, she took out a walkman containing sounds meant to calm her down and put on the headphones. This helped put her mind more at ease Little did she know, that from behind a dumpster, she was being spied on by two green twin raccoons. The younger one, Lifty, and his older brother in the fedora, Shifty, laughed to each other as they spotted her taking out her wallet to put use the parking meter. Ducking back, the two thieves argued to each other on how they were going to snatch her wallet. Shifty took a fishing rod out from his hat, which looked way too big to even fit in there, and they snickered to each other again.
While Flaky was using the meter and not looking, Lifty and Shifty came out from the side of the store and Shifty reeled the rod back to prepare to cast it to snatch her wallet. Unfortunately, as the hook flew backward, it latched onto a garbage boot. Shifty through the rod forward, causing it to and smack Lifty square in the face, leaving a boot step print on his face. The boot had also been knocked off the hook, but it missed her wallet, much to Shifty's frustration. He tried again, this time, it caught a protruding nail from a pole, which flew and pierced Lifty right in the tongue as he recovered from the boot, causing him to scream in pain. Since Flaky had her headphones on, she couldn't hear any of this. Once again, Shifty missed. He tried once again, and has Lifty tried to pull the nail from his tongue with a hammer, the hook pierced his left ear. Shifty, none the wiser, cast the line again, ripping his brothers ear clean off, leaving him screaming in pain as blood squirted from the hole in his head. No luck for Shifty. One last time, he gave a mighty heave backward with his rod. This time, the hook caught on to a nearby power line, causing electricity to surge into the hook, down the line, though the rod, directly into Shifty, causing him to light up like a Christmas tree. It left his fur charred, his eyes bloodshot, and his rod destroyed.
Flaky had finished using the meter and had walked though the automatic doors to the restaurant. Shifty had had enough of this nonsense and ran up to her and reached for a good old fashioned snatch-and-grab. Just as he was about to grab the wallet however, the doors closed on his hand with the force of two jackhammers. He once again wailed in agony and tried to yank his arm from the doors, with no success. Lifty even tried helping him get his arm out, this only caused his arm to hemorrhage. Lifty went and got a monkey wrench from his van hoping to break the door and free his brother. But just as he swung it down, the doors opened, causing him to hit Shifty's already badly injured arm, splitting the bone right in two. Shifty screamed at the top of his lungs as he cradled his dislocated arm, with bone protruding from the skin and blood dripping out.
At that moment, the heard a sound that scared him more than anything, the sound of police sirens. The two badly wounded thieves looked to see a police car, manned by a purple deer with clown make-up on his face who never utters a sound, named Mime, wearing a police uniform and making the sounds from an invisible crank horn.
"Uh-oh," the two Racoons went, and they both bolted toward their van and drove off, with Mime in hot pursuit.
Afterward, a green bear wearing army camouflage and dog tags pulled up in his jeep. This bear, Flippy, happily walked inside looking to get some groceries, not seeming to notice the blood. He grabbed his shopping cart and whistled as he made his way through the aisles. As he wheeled along, he took the time to wave to some of his friends he saw there. Flaky was having her stuff checked out at the counter by The Mole, a blind pink mole with a shirt that covered his mouth, a pair of glasses, and a walking stick. Petunia, an obsessive-compulsive blue skunk wearing a flower on her head and an air-freshener on her neck, was checking browsing meats at the deli section. Even Lumpy, a tall unintelligent blue moose who was working at the place as a janitor. Being a veteran of a brutal war which took a massive toll on him, these were the kind of days that Flippy lived for. A beautiful day surrounded by friends, and no surprises.
As Lumpy was cleaning one of the aisles, his stomach started to growl and he started to crave something to eat. He looked over and saw a foil pan of popcorn.
"Mmmmmmm," he went, as he took the pan from its shelf, totally forgetting that he isn't allowed to eat the food there. He took a lighter from his pocket, switched it on and held the light just below the pan. He waved the light around below it, impatiently grumbling to himself, before popping could finally be heard. He stupidly laughed to himself as the foil grew bigger.
Flippy, from another aisle, heard the sound of popping popcorn. As he stopped and listened, his mind translated the sounds into that of gunfire, which caused him to sweat. As the sounds disturbed him more and more, he found himself back in the hellish pits of the war in which he fought. Seeing bullets speeding toward him, he ducked to find cover. He found himself crawling through countless bodies in order to survive this nightmare. All of a sudden, he found himself facing two familiar faces. Before him were the mangled bodies of his two best friends and comrades, Sneaky, and Mouse Ka-Boom, with not a hint of life left in their eyes. Flippy was so horrified that he couldn't even scream. Before he even had a chance to weep for his fallen friends.
Back in the present, his eyes twitched violently, turning a devilish yellow color, and his breathing turned absolutely savage. His fear turned into uncontrollable rage and an urge to kill anything he see's breathing, much like the war. He then abandoned his cart, and searched for his first victim.
Flaky was still and the check-out counter, sorting through all her groceries. Little did she notice the flipped out bear emerging behind her. Just as she noticed there was someone behind her, Flippy grabbed the back of her head violently, causing her to scream hysterically. With his free hand, he turned on the check-out conveyor belt, making it go at an incredible speed. He then rammed her head straight into the belt. AS he held it there, blood began to run from her face along the belt, coating it red. He lifted her head and it was badly bruised, with her still screaming. He pressed her head against it once again, and raised it to show her face completely skinned, and one of her eyeballs were hanging by a thread. He then pressed her face one final time, until her body went completely limp. He raised her head, which was now completely missing its entire front half and bleeding profusely. At the end of the checkout desk, The Mole, unaware of what was happening, grabbed each of Flakys organs and bagged them like groceries.
Flippy then turned his attention over to Petunia, who screamed and hid behind the deli department counter. She curled there in a fetal position panicking and trying not to make a sound. She listened carefully to his footsteps, hoping to find an opportunity to escape. She heard the steps travel alongside the opposite end of the counter. Suddenly, her eye caught something on the floor. It was a discarded olive that looked like it had been there for days, disgusting looking and forming mold. The obsessive compulsive skunk was absolutely repulsed at the sight and let out a slight shriek, before quickly putting her hands on her mouth in a panic, remembering the homicidal maniac who was after her. She heard the footsteps stop for a moment, as if it had heard Petunias sound, causing her heard to thump hard against her chest. Then, she heard the footsteps continue, getting quieter and quieter. She cautiously peeked out from behind the counter. There was no sign of Flippy, Just some empty food aisles and an empty shopping cart rolling past like a rolling tumbleweed. She let out a quiet and exasperated sigh of relief before looking back the other way. Next thing she knew, a meat hook was rammed right into her stomach, giving her intense and unbearable pain. She looked over horrified to see Flippy holding the other end of the chain. He then sword the chain, hook, and skunk around with great force and ease, the centrifugal force slowly yanked more and more of her innards out. Finally, she snapped off of her internal organs and her lifeless body flew toward the window, crashing through and leaving her body on the asphalt outside the store, with several shards of glass impaled through it.
With Petunias intestines in his hand, Flippy continued to prowl the store for anymore survivors, when he heard a sneeze coming from the freezer. He opened the freezer door and yanked out all the milks and cheeses to find Lumpy hiding there, shivering with cold. Laughing maniacally, he yanked Lumpy out of the freezer, wrapped Petunia's intestines around his neck, jumped onto his back, and proceeded to strangle him with them. At that moment, a butterfly through the broken window toward the homicidal bear. Just when Lumpy was beginning to lose consciousness, it flew in front of Flippy and got his attention. Such a beautiful and innocent sight was enough to snap Flippy out of his homicidal rage. He loosened his grip and the two of them fell to the floor, giving Lumpy the liberty to gasp for breath.
"Awww," cooed Flippy, who was now back to his peaceful state and admiring the Butterfly. Suddenly, he heard an ear piercing scream. He looked over to the store entrance to see a horrified Lamb with a white Wool coat, Lammy, carrying a pickle named Mr. Pickles, which she claimed was alive, looking at the scene. Flippy looked down to see Lumpy with bruises all around his neck and trying to catch his breath. He then looked around to see the blood soaked scene of his massacre with horror in his eyes. He then looked down at his hands to see them covered with blood. He simply stood there, traumatized by what he had done.
The following days were rough for Flippy. The incident at the Supermarket wasn't the first time he had lost control, but now, everywhere he went there was a sense of fear among those he encountered. They tried not to show it, but he could tell that his friends were nervous when he was around them.
One day, Flippy was walking across the sidewalk feeling bummed out, when he saw some of his friends, Toothy, a purple beaver with abnormally large buck teeth, Mime, a purple reindeer wearing a striped shirt and clown make-up who never uttered a sound, Sniffles, an intelligent blue anteater wearing glasses and a pocket protector, Handy, an orange amputee carpenter beaver who wore a hard had, a tool belt, and bandages around his arms, Nutty, a hyperactive green sugar-addicted squirrel with a lazy eye and candy stuck to him, and Cro-Marmot, a stone-age marmot with long hair that covered his eyes, a loincloth, and a giant club, who was encased in a giant ice-block.
Flippy asked if he maybe he could join them. Toothy nervously told him that he was sorry but they were all full, sweating and trying to smile. Flippy noticed that the others were noticeable fearful. Flippy put his looked down sad and went on his way, as his friends looked on, not being able to help but feel slightly guilty.
That night, he arrived back in his neighborhood. He noticed little Cub, an infant tan bear wearing a diaper and a beanie playing in a sandbox in his backyard. Cub's father, Pop, a tan bear wearing a bathrobe and smoking a pipe, came out and noticed Flippy looking at them. He nervously chuckles and quickly took his son inside, locking the doors. Flippy became very depressed and went back to his house.
As he approached his home, Giggles, a pink chipmunk wearing a pink bow on her head, was watering some flowers in her garden, when she noticed Flippy walking up to his door in such a depressed state. She couldn't help but take pity on him and went over to his house. She knocked on the door, only to find that it was unlocked.
"Hello?" She muttered, as she stepped inside, looking for the houses sole resident.
As she passed through his halls, she noticed a series of pictures of him back in the war days, along with several honors he received. Many of the photos were of him and his two best friends at the time, Mouse Ka-Boom and Sneaky. Hung above them were their dog tags, which he had kept all this time. She then heard the sound of cabinet drawers being opened. She followed the sounds until he found Flippy in his bedroom, going through his things and placing them on a large clothe next to a stick. When Flippy noticed her, Giggles came in to ask if he was alright, and what he was doing. He sighed sadly and told her that the everyone was better off without him, and that he was leaving. This shocked Giggles, who asked him where he was going. He showed her a picture of a far off monastery up in the mountains, where he can spend the rest of his days at peace with himself and not be a threat to anybody. As Flippy gathered his war memorabilia, Giggles protested and tried to convince him to stay, but Flippy felt that his friends wouldn't always be in danger around him, and that he couldn't in good conscious do that to them. Once he got everything he could carry together, he tied them into a bindle and prepared to leave. He made Giggles promise not to tell anyone where he was going and hugged her goodbye. He then went on his way, with Giggles looking on helplessly.
Leaving was tough for Flippy. Coming home from the war, he, like so many others who had survived that horror, was heavily scrutinized by the masses for being a monster and taking part in an unethical conflict. The people here however, took him in and treated him as their friend. He saw this place as a new start for him after suffering so much torment and loss. But he remembered what happened at the supermarket, and felt that they deserved better than him. He looked back one last time at his old home and then marched off, intending never to come back. Once he was out of sight, Giggles looked up at Flippy's abandoned home, sighed sadly, and went home.
Now I know I'm probably gonna get a lot of negative reviews for having Flippy kill Flaky at the very beginning of the story. I am aware that the HTF fandom is comprised of a lot of people who see the two as a couple. Therefore, I feel that it may be appropriate to address your concerns in the most dignified way i know possible.
I DO NOT CARE FOR FLIPPYXFLAKY!
As a matter of fact, I openly despise it. 90% of all the fan work I see for Happy Tree Friends is just a romance between those two characters. And why? Because he didn't get to her during one of his flip outs 2 out of 6 times? I bet he had a pretty gruesome death in store for her before The Mole blew her up that one time. I spit in the face of FlippyXFlaky and will resist it at all costs!
And don't go thinking that there is going to be romance between Flippy and Giggles either. There are going to be many points in the story where it might look like it to some of you, but I assure you, Flippy is going to have no love interest in this story.
That being said, I hope you enjoyed the first chapter and I hope to crank out the rest soon :).